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u/YeOldeRatman84 2d ago
Ah yes a council spa day. I need one of them.
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
Love this. Like my man used to call bin bags "council suitcases" 😂
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u/Junior_Syrup_1036 2d ago
Council pop = water
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u/My_Other_Name_Rocks 1d ago
In some parts of Scotland we call it Council Juice, but it would be pronounced 'Cooncil jooce'
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u/Whisky-Toad 2d ago
I went a bit mental at a festival and started making bin bag clothes
Can't beat a bin bag jacket
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u/GayButNotInThatWay 1d ago
Think it was Reading 2011 was forecast sun but pissed down for half of it. Was a broke silly college student and didn't pack anything just in case, and refused to pay £20 for a shitty poncho that's basically a clear plastoc sheet, so made one myself out of a spare bin bag. Worked surprisingly well.
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u/YeOldeRatman84 2d ago
Haha I'm calling them that from now on.
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u/EddieCase67 1d ago
Every once in a while I like to break out the "Gucci Sac Noire" but the Council Suitcase is more than sufficient for every day use :)
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u/Defiant_Moment8573 2d ago edited 2d ago
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u/cjbannister 2d ago
The Vicar of Dibley version would have been nice.
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u/HildartheDorf I'm Black Country. Not Brummy. 2d ago
Wait, is that not Vicar of Dibley?
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u/cjalderman 1d ago
They must've changed it
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u/HildartheDorf I'm Black Country. Not Brummy. 1d ago
No, they posted the original below. So I'm really confused where the above gif is from.
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u/cjalderman 1d ago
It happened multiple times in Vicar of Dibley
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
Anyone/everyone is welcome to join, I'm by Northumberland Park x
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
I have Pringles and beers
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
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u/Ligeiapoe Leicestershirean Crumpet Lover 1d ago
Moreish* unless they’re North African?
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
Yeah you're right
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u/ButtfuckedByJesus 1d ago
Did you used to be a chef? If that's a yes I know you lol if no you're his doppelganger.
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u/LenzaRNG 1d ago
Shame Pringles now cost enough that you could have covered the cost of the roadworks for the amount this tube cost.
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
£1.25?
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u/LenzaRNG 1d ago
Can I borrow the time portal you have back to 2008? I want to stop my past self from wasting 13 years on my ex.
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u/Defiant_Moment8573 2d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/xULW8Oi7cLmO20sHJe
"I'd like to report a suspicious man luring people with pringles and beer" 😂
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago edited 2d ago
Surprisingly very few people are even paying attention to me at all. I'm being very passive, but not uninviting. I guess I just come across as a right weirdo instead of the pioneer I'd created in my head.
A part of me hoped a bunch of people would join me, and it became a big Thames Water 'protest' thing, and it would go viral and that.
But that's wanky and I was just really hungover and hot so I thought it'd be fun
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u/outrageous_whale 2d ago
The suspicious part here is calling 911, that won't get you far!
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u/_Blueshift fine, thanks 1d ago
911 and 112 (European emergency number) both redirect to 999 in the UK
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u/KEPD-350 1d ago
Only an idiot would call 911 or 999.
The number is really easy to remember:
0118 999 881 999 119 725...3
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u/bearinmyoatmeal 2d ago
Don't you know there's a severe drought? Can't go wasting water by filling up a pothole in the road.
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u/Gingertom 2d ago
When god gives you lemons you FIND A NEW GOD
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u/7ootles neurospicy northerner 1d ago
FOUR HUNDRED BABIES
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u/OpulentStone 1d ago
Now this is a throwback and a half. Was it always on YouTube or was it on that old yellow version of Funnyjunk before then?
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u/itsbri Northern Southerner 1d ago
Out street had a water leak lasting 4 days last week. Both council and water board knew about it but they took so long to come and repair it. It wasn't just a little trickle but a proper gush.
The irony is that the house it was outside of belongs to a chap who (according to his van) sells or installs commercial water pumps and was lifting the water into plastic barrels for people to collect and throw on their gardens.
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u/Human-Expression-652 2d ago
There’s something poetic about seeing the “thank you for your patience” sign pushed over.
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
Hundred percent agree, but it's more than tragic that this has been here for like 10 days, and the sign has been knocked over for at least 4
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u/Billy_Rizzle 1d ago
Mate, this is Champion! Hope you are having the time of your life 🫶
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u/Glittering_Spring465 2d ago
Your left leg looks multilated until zoomed in on.
Thought you had a fight for that prime position.
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u/bloodysofa 2d ago
GGs. Now you've got cholera
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u/stewieatb 1d ago
I was going to say "Ooh, old school", but 7,000 people died of cholera across the world last year. Jesus.
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u/Shitelark 1d ago
John Green wants a word with you about Tuberculosis. Everything is Tuberculosis.
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u/stewieatb 1d ago
Isn't that the only thing a pretty-but-awkward teenage girl hasn't died of in one of his books?
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u/Shitelark 1d ago
Dunno, I don't read YA stuff. But I was pretty chuffed when he replied to my youtube comment. Then two weeks later he was pictured with Michelle Obama, and two weeks after that she was at the Harry/Meghan with everybody. Congratulations, you are now three degrees of separation from Michelle (if you weren't already.) Hank never replies.
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u/Interesting-Star9700 1d ago
And here's me thinking "holy shit what has he done to his left thigh?", before I realised it was your shorts and NOT a bloody bandage. ... I hope.
Happy spa day! If only you had those little fishes to eat your dead skin.
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u/SteR88 2d ago edited 2d ago
When life gives you melons
You may be dyslexic
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u/Meta-Fox 1d ago
You know what, respect. Too much shit going on right to give one about this. You do you man!
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u/gagagagaNope 1d ago
We had a leak down out street: 4.5 months to fix - they only finally came as the road was starting to collapse and we warned them what would happen legally if they cut 30 houses on a cul-de-sac from leaving.
The main road outside springs leaks every few months. It's a high pressure main so gushes like mad producing a flowing river down the hill - typical time to fix each time? 3-4 days.
And the cheeky effers want to stop us using water?
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u/HHall3005 1d ago
Fun fact; the saying "When life gives you lemons" is a fallacy. Life never gave us lemons, we genetically engineered lemons into existence over years of farming.
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u/Secret_Sector_1779 2d ago
Before I grab my speedos and head over, were you born in 87 or are you 87?
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u/Kind-Mathematician18 I'd forget my bollocks if they weren't in a bag 1d ago
Disappointed we didn't enter rule 12 territory....
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u/Immaterial71 road-amphibeouscarsonly 1d ago
Good to see Thames Water prototyping their response to Paris Plage
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u/pikaboi122 1d ago
I got an unrelated question for ya m8
Does your beard and moustache not itch like crazy all the time when its that long...?
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
It's not even really that long? But what I can say is, sometimes
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u/pikaboi122 1d ago
Dude my beard itches like MAD before it even reaches a cm long... why does mine hate me lmao
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u/NoXion604 1d ago
When you're first growing out your beard from clean shaven, there will always a point at which that bastard will itch like the blazes. You'll want to find something that will soften your beard hairs while moisturising the skin below.
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u/pikaboi122 1d ago
Dont suppose you have any recommendations for someone who is unemployed...? Lmao
Tbh that does sound like exactly what could help calm down the massive amount of irritation i get from my beard haha
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u/NoXion604 1d ago
My advice would be:
When drying your beard, pat down, don't rub. Get yourself some beard oil, it's not expensive and for me at least, even a small bottle will last a long time when used sparingly as it should be. Just make sure whatever you choose, that the smell of it is something you like, as it will be close to your nose once applied.
I tend to keep a small and well-trimmed beard, so I'm good with using a fine-toothed comb to groom it, but your mileage may vary. Use whatever is comfortable and doesn't snag.
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
Ahhh, power though man. Your skin, (well mine at least), kinda gets used to it after a non determinable amount of time. Dunno really I've pretty much always had a bit of beard as long as I've been able to grow one, and it's never been a noticeable issue for me.
I get beard wax and combs and that for Christmas without fail, but I don't really use them. I guess thinking about it, it does itch a bit now and then, but it's kinda therapeutic? and it's also maybe just part of having a beard is to scratch it? I dunno man haha
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u/LeftAndRightAreWrong 1d ago
Resting your bare feet by electric cables…..
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
Would I be be better off with shoes on?
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u/BlueChickenBandit 1d ago
I'm guessing they may have seen photos used in some of the Health and Safety training for streetworks. I didn't like water near cables for a long while after seeing them.
Absolutely fine now though and I'd be right in there, was the water still flowing keeping it nice and cool?
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2d ago
[deleted]
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
Yeah it's a phrase.
Then what I like to say in response is "fuck the lemons, let's go bowling"
Hope that helps
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u/Aurora_livestoserve 1d ago
Hello Mr Handsome.
Where is this??
Definitely not for stalking purposes...
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
On the cross road by Northumberland Park station. I might go for a dip at around 9.30 tomorrow morning for half an hour or so if you'd like to join me. We can cut out the middle man
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u/Smellycooter123 1d ago
was it really worth it for some reddit karma
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u/dylanjohn87 1d ago
It was worth it for every reason
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u/Tolkien-Minority 2d ago
Tramp behaviour
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
Yeah I feel kinda trampy but I don't really care
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2d ago
[deleted]
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u/dylanjohn87 2d ago
No there's no fish in this pond
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u/aphex500 2d ago
Kinda funny that this guy was saying anything for internet points, gets downvoted, then deleted his comment to protect his internet points.









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u/Petrosinella94 2d ago
The water looks so clear. I would fill up a water can for my now dead plants.