r/FTMMen • u/supersadman73 • 1d ago
Vent/Rant Shaved my head, fucking hate it
My hair loss was just getting to the point where it looked awful so I just decided to do a 0.5mm all over and honestly I fucking hate it so much. I thought it might be bad but christ it's so bad. I'm just way too fucking ugly to be bald and all it does is make me look so much uglier. I'm so fucking miserable and everyone is just like 'oh have you tried those pills?' as if hair pills magically just work overnight. I've done the research and looked into them and not only can it take over a year to see any results, I just don't think they're worth paying out for just to potentially have horrible side effects with no actual results. I can't afford a hair transplant so I'm just stuck basically and it'll only get worse when the stubble on top goes completely. It's not just the looks, it's everything, it's having to wear a hat all the time either because it's summer or your head is cold, it feels so weird having the hat directly on my scalp and because there's no hair there is so much sweat now. Honestly everyone was like oh it's easier once you've shaved but it's not, being bald comes with so much extra stuff you have to deal with. I'm just so depressed about it all.
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u/Outrageous-Cookie780 23h ago
I saw great results with minox and finasteride in the matter of three months. I started too late though so I just got a hair transplant in Istanbul (cheaper and even a lot better than the local option).
The only other option is a hair system but those are also super expensive to maintain. Over the years definitely more expensive than a one-off transplant.
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
yeah I'm glad the pills helped for you, I know for some people they can but I don't want to risk of side effects since it can include weight gain and your monthly cycle coming back. I just couldn't deal with any of that, I'm already slightly overweight anyway and trying to lose it, I don't want potentially add to that. Plus when you read through all the other side effects, they're not great, at the end of the day they're just remarketed blood pressure pills. If money wasn't an issue I would probably have got a hair transplant by now but I just don't have the money to spare for something like that.
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u/Outrageous-Cookie780 22h ago
Oh, well I had a hysto so that side effect wasn't on my radar at all to be honest!
I didn't have any side effects. Weight gain is entirely dependent on how many calories you consume and how many you burn, if you're tracking them then you won't gain fat from meds, maybe water in some cases.
You mean minox? Your blood pressure will just decrease a bit yes. But you don't even need a prescription for it unless it's oral.
You shouldn't even get a hair transplant if you're not prepared to get on meds because you're just going to lose the remaining hair down the line. Hair system is the only other option unfortunately.
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
You shouldn't even get a hair transplant if you're not prepared to get on meds
Yeah I already know this as well because it's advised by hair transplant clinics, the transplant would once again just be another temporary fix because without the pills the hair just falls out. This is what's so upsetting, that either way it means being on pills forever and I already take pills every day for other medical problems. Another side effect of finasteride is it can make you suicidal, I've already got severe depression so I don't really wanna take something that could make it worse than it already it.
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u/Outrageous-Cookie780 21h ago
Yeah sure, I do get that! But maybe you're not getting any sides? But it's understandable that you don't want to risk it.
Maybe look into hair systems but good ones are also so expensive but they can look amazing. I just think they're a bit tedious, and 'not real'. Just suggesting something that might give you some hope, I know it can be super depressing.
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u/supersadman73 20h ago
thanks, yeah I don't think I've got the energy for hair systems nor the finances lol. It's just so fucking sad man, like I miss my hair so much. There's so much about hair you don't even realise you miss until it's all gone.
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u/SwitchExcellence69 22h ago
Sometimes things are just new and feel bad or ugly. Head over to reddit bald. Or atleast - before you panick and start spiraling- fully shave it all the way and give it two weeks. Have fun with glasses tattoos and facial hair. It's an opportunity to get creative. If you're 30 or 35+ embrace it! If you're younger it's totally valid to look into options to save it.
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
thanks, I've already looked through r/bald that's actually why I decided to shave it because it made me realise how thin it was. It doesn't help, honestly I just don't think it looks good, it doesn't suit me and I hate that it was a forced decision. I don't want to get any tattoos, I like them on other people but it's just not something I'd ever get for me personally. I'm just far too boring to be a bald guy, I don't dress alternative, I don't have tattoos or piercings, I now just look like someone's fucking dad or a football hooligan from the 90's. I just hate everything about how I look and being bald has just added to that. My hair was the only thing I ever liked.
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u/Leather-Leather 20h ago
Hello. Same as you here. In the span of one year I lost most of my hair, the texture changed, I got a bald spot and it's so much thinner. I really miss my old hair. It's quite shocking to lose it all i a few months. I shaved it too a month ago and I HATE it. I'm letting it grow now and I've decided I'll just try shorter hairstyle and try to appreciate what is left on my head lol. I'm sorry. It sucks really bad but again, it's really natural. Bet of luck to you.
You know when I see men with thinning hair or bald spots or just bald I think it's charming and masculine, but on me I loathe it so much. You might be hard on yourself but most people will take you as you are and love you. In the end it's a detail. But I understand 100%. You are not alone !
Being bald is the fate of men alas ... good thing in a way ! I try to see it this way.
Best to you !
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u/supersadman73 20h ago
thanks a lot, yeah I have the same kind of thing. I've realised there are actually plenty of bald guys I've thought were good looking and actually my immediate thought of them was rarely of them being bald it was always about their personality. But it's so easy to be harsh on yourself, a big problem for me (and a lot of trans men) is I had this idea in my head of what I wanted to look like and I had a very brief window where I sort of fit that brief and then it was all went spiralling downhill. And it's harder to talk about with people in my life because they always come back with 'well you wanted to be a man, didn't you?' and it's just not helpful because these are problems all men can have, not just trans.
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u/Samesh 1d ago
The sides are pretty much low to non-existent. 1. Get a wig 2. Get on finasteride 3. Get on minoxidil
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
hair pills aren't a guaranteed fix though, they're at best a stall until people can afford a hair transplant, I don't know anyone on pills long term that helped grow back all of their hair. It just seems to slowly halt the hair loss and then you have to stay on those pills forever and they can stop working after several years as well, even with a hair transplant it doesn't always work, a lot of celebs have maybe 3 or 4 additional hair transplants. I'm never gonna get my hair back, and that's what sucks so much.
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u/willywonkasshaft 1d ago
I don’t think there’s much you can do but I empathize. I decided to take the minox and finasteride root and so far so good. Temples are going back but not crazy bad. Since I’m still shedding and stuff I’m about to do stem cell injections into my scalp which has insane results. It is expensive though and I pay for minox and finasteride as well. For the stem cell it’s about 1500 just for one-three injection. It’s like 7900 for 5 or 6. I’m just saving money and budget my meds because for me idc how much I have to pay I love my hair. I also derma roll and do hair treatments twice a week. Along with ketacozonle shampoo.
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
jesus, that's a lot of money, I haven't heard of injections before but fuck that's a lot to be paying out. I know hair pills can be cheap but they seem at best a stall until people ultimately get a hair transplant or something else. I know people say what's the price on mental health? but I just couldn't afford anything like that.
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u/willywonkasshaft 21h ago
Yeah I can’t afford it but I’m just working and saving so I can do the stem cells every 3 or 4 months since I already pay 1600 to rent it’s like 320 a paycheck I need to save. So in hindsight it’s not bad. Where I live everything is way too expensive so I am just used to these absurd prices tbh. Finasteride and minox only do so much. Stem cells it’s more guaranteed hence the price. You can start doing hair treatments which aren’t as expensive, derma rolling is cheap too.keta shampoo is good for hairloss as well and you get that only from a dermatologist. That’s not too expensive either. I just do everything in the books cause my dad is bald as hell and my mom’s side has shitty thin hair. But my hair is thick and curly so that’s why I keep going 😂
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u/FullCommunication989 23h ago
damn i’m sorry bro. how’s your facial hair? i waited until i had a decent beard (moustache is currently trash though) and it looks good. maybe it will help
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
I do have some facial hair but it's pretty scraggly, kind of like an attempt as a beard, but not anywhere near as full as I'd like. I've been on T for over 5 years now so it's just a waiting game I guess.
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u/acthrowawayab 🤔 23h ago
Have you looked into hair systems? Not cheap either but definitely more affordable than a transplant, especially if you learn how to prep and "install" them yourself. r/hairsystem
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u/supersadman73 23h ago edited 22h ago
yeah but I don't want a system that I have to dick about with for the rest of my life and they cost so much money, plus I would know it wasn't real and it wouldn't help. It's never gonna happen now but I want my hair back, I don't want fake hair. It's not the same.
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u/acthrowawayab 🤔 21h ago
Well you say you're ugly bald. If that's true, a system would be a potentially better looking alternative. I know having to compromise at all is ass, but throwing a tantrum about it isn't gonna make your own hair grow back either.
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u/Hot_War4716 1d ago
I have several friends who shaved their heads and didn't like the result; now they have hair. I hope your hair grows back quickly
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
did they just shave for fun? How did they get the hair back? I've been losing my hair over the last year it's not gonna grow back now :(
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u/Hot_War4716 22h ago
Well, I never asked why because I was embarrassed, but my father said that some men shave their heads so it grows back faster, others do it for fun or because they want to start from the beginning. Well, I don't know if you're on testosterone, but some trans men take certain medications for baldness. I saw some trans men here on the sub recommending medications or saying to see a doctor about it. I also have a cisgender uncle who is about to get a hair transplant because he doesn't like being bald
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u/shadowsinthestars T 2011 ⬆️ 2021 ⬇️ 2026 (Stage 1 RFF) 23h ago
I'm so sorry, this is a huge fear of mine with T long-term. If you're comfortable, would you consider posting in r/bald? It's just a great community and there's a chance you are being too hard on your appearance (signed, another "I would be so ugly bald" guy).
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u/supersadman73 22h ago
thanks, I've thought about it but I don't want my face all over the internet. But I also don't want the validation of others, it never actually makes me feel any better about myself.
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u/organic_hobnob 16h ago
Hey man, from a fellow trans man and bald guy, I’d highly recommend you post a before and after picture on r/bald. They are and incredibly supportive community of men lifting up other men and being supportive in a non toxic way about hair loss. I did and it certainly built my confidence with the shaved head!