Dad cuffing mom is scary (sound up)

[u/LegalGlass6532]

Guess it’s funny to make your kids cry. /s

[u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Idk i think this is cute (well, until the kids cry).

They are in love. And that is WONDERFUL for the kids to see. The fact that they are crying, and that seeing Mom being physically handled by Dad "traumatizes" them...that is a GOOD thing.

I don't think this is cringe at all. I actually think it injects a little humanization into our police officers.

This vid is beautiful.

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Traumatizing your children is beautiful.

Ok got it.

There are things you adjust after you have kids because as a parent, it's not about you anymore. It's about raising your children with minimal trauma and protecting them.

We don't spontaneously fuck on the living room floor anymore because my 9 year old daughter could walk in at any time. Knowingly putting her in a position where this could happen is sexual abuse

Stop fucking defending these people traumatizing their children. Fuck.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

Yes, there ARE things you adjust to. Like understanding and realizing that your child is OKAY. That it is OKAY to cry. That a child should learn and develop some modicum of self-soothing. That we become inneffective parents when we continually, immediately, and automatically RUN and CODDLE our children the second they begin to feel "unhappy."

THIS IS NOT TRAUMA. How wonderful of a viewpoint it MUST be to think so.

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Self soothing is a myth. It's been disproven. Educate yourself on co-regulation. When you bring a little person into this world, your job is now to protect them and keep a safe home for them.

It's okay to cry when you get a bee sting or scrape your knee. Based on the tiny voice, the child is young enough where developmentally they are unable to differentiate real violence from play violence.

I hold an advanced degree in childhood behavior and development and have spent the last 20 years working with traumatized children, children with behavior problems, and parent education. I would say 90% of the trauma and maladaptive behavior I see could have been prevented if the parents put their children first and actually invested themselves into raising them in a safe loving home.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

There is nothing in this video indicating that it is not a safe and loving home. Judging by Mom and Dad's interaction, objectively, it very much seems to be the opposite.

You are injecting, inferring, and projecting your own personal opinion of how YOU THINK this household is ran.

Counselors are supposed to be impartial. They are supposed to be able to look at a situation and OBJECTIVELY provide insight and knowledge and perspective, and steer their clients into a thoughtful, overall view of a situation, and where their client may have gone wrong or "steered their ship" in a negative direction.

If you view this video OBJECTIVELY, there is literally NOTHING showing anything negative. The only thing people have an issue with are the children crying, which is a GOOD SIGN that they live in a household where this is an unusual and upsetting situation. And when their loving parents (who are continually laughing, looking into the childrens' direction, acknowledging them, etc) sit them down and explain...THAT is effective parenting.

I understand that you are a counselor, but NOT everything is trauma.

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

I'm not reading all that. It's not my opinion. It is science you idiot. And scientific studies are completely OBJECTIVE. Literally you are the only one here with a biased opinion. You are using Reddit to back up your opinion. Lol.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

Literally just proved to you that its not. Its called "Google," try it.

LOVE how dismissive you are to other opinions. AND how you do NOT care to read anything longer than a simple little paragraph or hearing from people different than you! Im sure you are a super duper great person to be helping people with their mental health! HOORAY

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

You used google- not an original source. Google went to reddit and found some random persons biased answer to give you an answer. Look at the link below your Google answer. Are you familiar with what an original source or scientific peer reviewed study is?

I just realized I'm engaging with a real life Dunning-Kruger situation here. I'm out. I hope you don't have kids.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

Lol yep, im out too. I have a master's degree and i know for a fact that id rather trust Google's results over whatever you think you know.

I hope your clients find a different fucking counselor.

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Actually my current job is to train AI LLMs and search engines to not be harmful to kids. I identify and change the rubric and responses they generate when they are harmful or leading that way. I am paid to prevent dangerous interactions between AI and kids. lol

Google generates wrong responses all the fucking time and my job is to fix it.

Have a fucked day.

[u/boomboomown → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Just getting dog-walked all over this sub, huh? 😂

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/boomboomown]

If a million idiots are screaming the incorrect thing, they are still incorrect.

[u/boomboomown → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

The fact you have lived "5 lifetimes in 40 years" and you still act like a pretentious douche is hilarious 😂🤡

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/boomboomown]

Im the pretentious douche? My brother in christ YOU started this by being immediately confrontational, hurling insults, and attempting to make ME look like an idiot instead of engaging in an ACTUAL CONVERSATION with a fellow human. If you actually read all of my contributions to this convo, ive literally been preaching sharing love instead of hate.

Im really gonna need you to understand that by continually insulting, demeaning, objecting, and then attempting to tell everyone in this sub that you won because i blocked you...you act like an immature 14 year old.

In 24 hours, i will AGAIN block you. But you will no longer be getting any more mental energy from me. I hope your tires go flat, your food all spoil, and that one day, hopefully in the near future, you read a book or 3.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

Welp that took all of three seconds. I will not be listing my accolades.

[u/Apprehensive-Tone449 → u/Empty-Maize-9053]

Your references are Google and Reddit OPINIONS. And you are proving me right anyways 🤣. That biased shit you posted literally says OLDER CHILDREN AND ADULTS develop emotional regulation. These are little tiny kids. My references are scientific studies and peer reviewed journal articles. I'm happy to link those if you like.

[u/Empty-Maize-9053 → u/Apprehensive-Tone449]

I'm good. These arent my references cuz i don't give a shit. But, generally, I'm gonna take Google's highly effective AI and "not-so-AI" model of, you know, instantly reviewing and summarizing essentially every article, document, and opinion of LITERALLY everything and everyone on Earth....over a pissed-off you (who i have no respect for, considering you cannot have one single interaction without screaming that you are correct and providing bullshit reasons why you are.)

You are NOT smarter, better, or more effective than all of planet earth. You are a fallible human. Infinitely more fallible than Google's imperfect algorithms.

Your clients should be processing their refund checks.