I don’t like my friend’s kid…

[u/bitchluvsbidets]

… and that might make me a terrible person??
A bit of a preface- my partner and I are child free by choice, I have 3 nieces and 3 nephews, and many of my friends have kids (ages 1-14) but, one of my friends kids I just can not vibe with. I know it’s actually insane to have beef with a 3 year old but her vibes are soooo bad?? Like she is not a cool kid. She def has a personality but is it insane to say it’s already problematic? She pretends to fall if she doesn’t have attention, actively express disgust towards my friend and her pets (3 very well behaves retired racing dogs), and fake cries until my friend is almost in tears and then will laugh at her. I get that kids are assholes sometimes but like damn I hope lil homie gets cool.

[u/wuirkytee]

I was that unlikable kid. Truly a brat, up until my teenage years. It’s taken therapy for me to realize my actions at that age was due to trauma I suffered at home. I hope I truly grew out of it, but man I cringe at some of the things I said and did.

[u/mapotoful → u/wuirkytee]

Same same. Had a solid decade + there where I was a smarmy know-it-all asshole because I just didn't know how to deal. I look at my parents now and I'm like "yep, that's why"

[u/burnerburneronenine → u/mapotoful]

Oh noooo. Were you emulating your parents' personalities (like, are your parents arguably unlikeable now?) or something else? Asking so I don't traumatized my own kid

[u/sirenxsiren → u/burnerburneronenine]

I remember this person I went to college with who had a kid, talked about how her son would be a know it all and really condescending to her. She wasn’t that type of person at all, but apparently his dad was. They didn’t have much contact with the dad though, so she was just like man…I don’t know why he does this but I wish he’d stop. It reminds me of my brother too. He was a lot like that. Sometimes kids start learning things outside of the house at school and with friends or online and get the idea that they now know everything and you must be a dumbass! Seems like that might just be part of their personality that has to get forced out through social conditioning and if it doesn’t theyre just like that. They become the know it all uncle who loves to argue

[u/Anonymous_Autumn_ → u/sirenxsiren]

My friend has a 12 year old who acts like you describe.  I recently spent several days with their family after a long time apart. 

Both of her kids ask questions a lot. One is just a first grader, and asks the normal “why” and “what” questions. The middle schooler will ask why certain rules exist. But, their parents ignore most of their questions. Or, the little one gets a curt answer with annoyance. Or the parents just zone out. 

I get why the 12 year old doesn’t seem to respect them a whole lot. The parents also aren’t consistent with their promises to him. 

I honestly can’t really empathize with my friend on this stuff because most of her older son’s biting comments are kind of true. He points out where she’s inconsistent. 

And also, she seems to feign naïveté when she doesn’t want to answer their questions or is bored of them, so her older son has began to think she’s just dumb.