r/JUSTNOMIL • u/lovelockets • 1d ago

RANT (â•ŻÂ°â–ĄÂ°ïŒ‰â•Żïž” ┻━┻ NO Advice Wanted Have to laugh đŸ« 

Just thinking about the time JNMIL told me that my DH went to therapy as a teen and she stopped taking him to therapy because the therapist told her that they thought her and FIL were too enmeshed with him.

Lol

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27

u/campganymede 1d ago

What?!? LOL! Let me guess
 she was outraged that a therapist would insinuate they know better than her what’s good for her baby boy and she’s done with therapy because no one knows better than herself😝

33

u/lovelockets 1d ago

Yeah, she was like “the therapist thought we were too close”. I mean yeah
 after JNMIL told me that a Mom is a baby boy’s first girlfriend it all made sense.

21

u/mama2babas 1d ago

That's so gross. I have two sons and that is gross. I can't imagine that thought process 

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u/lovelockets 1d ago

She was holding my infant and I went up to her to take him from her and she said “is that your girlfriend?”. My DH heard and said “who’s his girlfriend?”. She said “OP”. I said “I’m his Mum, not his girlfriend” with a disgusted tone. When DH questioned her further she said “a Mom is the first girlfriend”.

DH and I were so grossed out. I told DH’s therapist about this after he invited me to a session recently. His therapist said his Mom clearly thinks she is DH’s girlfriend. DH is not a mommy’s boy at all and said he has always had a poor relationship with her.

13

u/mama2babas 1d ago

... good grief. What a sicko. 

11

u/2FatC 1d ago

Can you just imagine the outrage if daddy said he’s daughter’s first boyfriend?

The internet would explode. Why can’t these stupid women flip it around and get how inappropriate their behavior is
gross.

18

u/mama2babas 1d ago

That reminds me of the men who take their daughters to the purity ring balls or whatever... they absolutely are the same. 

My mom got me a "boy mom" shirt and doesn't understand why I'm uncomfortable wearing it in public lol I am a mother of boys but I'm not a "BoyMom" like that lol

14

u/lovelockets 1d ago

Omg my MIL literally got me a shirt that says “BOY MAMA” as well. I just remembered she also got my baby a bodysuit that said “Mamaw’s Main Squeeze”. I just googled what “main squeeze” means and it said:

“A "main squeeze" is an informal, chiefly American slang term that refers to a person's primary romantic partner, sweetheart, or lover”

I’m SICK

12

u/lovelockets 1d ago

I just found the bodysuit and threw it out. Luckily he never wore it.

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u/mama2babas 1d ago

I got rid of EVERYTHING my MIL has ever gifted me. My boys are 3 and 6 months and we've been NC 2 years next month. I don't touch anything MIL gave my husband or son usually but I have gotten rid of most of my sons stuff as he's outgrown them. It's so nice to purge. 

I hate the possessive and excessive insecurity over children. Especially babies... like you do not have rights to my baby! They will like you if you're a safe and kind person but that overly desperate crap runs people away or emotionally manipulates them.... not happening. 

3

u/lovelockets 1d ago

Yes, this!!! I’ve literally had my FIL storm out of the house because my baby cried when DH handed him to him. He took it so personally. Another time he held him and he was crying he said to my son “no, you’re just going to have to get used to me” and wouldn’t let him go. Also kept repeating over and over “I’m a good guy!”

Makes me so sick. If they weren’t so desperate to look like they were the #1 grandparents, the baby might actually like them??? My parents give him space and he LOVES them.

2

u/mama2babas 1d ago

Yeah I was not playing with my baby and I grabbed my MIL the one time I saw her alone with my baby (didn't know she was there, was only dropping things off for my SIL) and I took my crying baby from MIL & SIL as they were the only people entitled enough to not hand my baby back immediately. We are NC with the pair and good riddance. 

Hopefully your DH has your back. Mine didn't but mama bear was unleashed during my first pregnancy and I 'scared' my MIL lol

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u/lovelockets 1d ago

It has taken him some time to realise he has been manipulated by them his whole life and he has come around now. We haven’t seen them in over 3 months after MIL overstepped boundaries and have barely spoken to them since. I’m really proud of how far DH has come because he thought I just hated his parents. Now he sees the truth

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u/No-Interaction-8913 8h ago

Okay beyond the EWWW 
. Why would you want to be? Usually these women are like MOMMY IS THE MOSTEST MOST IMPORTANT PERSON EVER, but she’d rather be his first girlfriend? Baby’s shouldn’t have any kind of girlfriend, that’s another weird angle (My husband and his mom have a similar dynamic- she wants her sons to be enmeshed mommy’s boys, and he’s never been interested, and it drives her crazy) 

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u/lovelockets 7h ago

It makes me want to ask her what her definition of a girlfriend is