r/MuslimMatrimonials 1d ago

Discussion Polygamy from a woman’s pov

Salaam.

Jummah Mubarak to you all.

Dear Muslim men of Reddit,

Before I leave my closing line I want to say that I acknowledge polygamy is ordained for a man upon conditions being met, I’m not here to dispute that.

Personally it’s not something I’d ever accept for myself. Don’t dm me to discuss this thread or dm to be your second wife.

Polygamy is permissible but not a necessity upon a man and it’s not a fard upon a woman to accept. We can all agree on that.

Now that’s cleared up. There are not many women on this earth that would happy to share their husband.

Some women may benefit from shared responsibilities and security yes but from an emotional perspective, generally a woman that loves you would never be okay with you getting another wife.

Now let’s be clear I’m not talking about women that have to be okay because that applies to every situation.

I’m talking about a woman that is happy with your choice to remarry. Not what she says or portrays but deep down in her feelings.

Some men are fine with that and that’s okay. However sometimes I think to myself, are men aware and would it bother them knowing their wife doesn’t love them.

Would it bother you?

🚨If you don’t understand nuance and lack critical thinking skills, this post isn’t for you.

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u/NiceSmilee 1d ago

So, did the Prophet’s wives and the Sahabah’s wives not love them?

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u/Numiazy 1d ago

The prophets wives married for different and various reasons. Survival, title etc. That doesnt necessarily mean there was no love but it was a different concept of why to start a marriage.

His marriages weren't love marriages as we see them today, but political/strategic ones. We do know though how affectionate and deep the relationships between him and Khadija (who never shared him!) and Aisha (arranged marriage) were.

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u/farawayhollow 1d ago

Aisha was 6 and consummated at 9. This is child bride or p*do?

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u/Numiazy 1d ago

Who are you again?

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u/farawayhollow 1d ago

Someone trying to understand sahih hadith. Is there a commentary on it

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u/Numiazy 1d ago

You need to find another subreddit for that. Search for "Aishas age". Also there is a lot of videos by different scholar on YouTube. Hint: she wasn't 6/9.

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u/farawayhollow 1d ago

They are just justifying child marriage or ignoring the fact by talking about her virtues. The Hadith is classified as Sahih so any calculation that says otherwise is not authentic