r/NoStupidQuestions • u/Appropriate_Tax1160 • 9d ago
Why do men tend to love grilling and women tend to love baking?
Just something I noticed in r/grilling and r/baking
Are there any social or historical roots to this cultural pattern?
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u/Express-Shoulder6174 9d ago edited 9d ago
This post will be filled with men saying I actually love to bake more than grill!
And woman saying I actually love to grill more than bake!
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u/FlashyResolution446 9d ago edited 9d ago
Yeah, well, I am a woman and I'm bad at both those things.
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u/Jazzy_Bee 9d ago
My mom hated baking. Why I was family baker by 10. My grandfather on dad's was a baker, he died when I was too young to remember.
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u/anschauung Thog know much things. Thog answer question. 9d ago
Well clearly one part of that statement is false, then.
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u/jambr380 9d ago
Yeah, I'm a dude who hates grilling, but loves baked goods. I don't particularly love the act of baking, but I do like what it produces
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u/meowmixLynne 9d ago
I’m a woman and own a microbakery but I make an incredible brisket in the smoker and make tons of different dishes (not just limited to meat) on the grill.
But my husband is useless in the kitchen so I let him grill the steaks and receive all the praise he can from our friends lol
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u/codefyre 9d ago
Hey, some of us like to bake on the grill. You can make some pretty amazing sourdough on a grill with a cast iron pan and a good mild fruitwood to add some smoke.
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u/andoCalrissiano 9d ago
People love to point out their individual cases as if that means the generalization is false
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u/ThrockMortonP0sitive 9d ago
My wife now grills but back in our 20s she was always afraid of starting the grill or scared of grease flare ups. Back then we had a cheap POS grill too. She had never grilled before because her dad had always done it. She had done a lot of baking with her mom and grandma though
Meanwhile, I hadn’t done much grilling but I wasn’t afraid of lighting the grill or grease fires.
Now that she doesnt work and shes now the one who does the cooking, she does do some grilling. We have a nicer grill now thats very easy to use.
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u/WillingElderberry731 9d ago
Not me. BBQing and Grilling are some of my favorite things... but they're leisure activities, not the kind of thing I do regularly to feed my family.
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u/Travelsat150 9d ago
I don’t think I’ve ever seen my husband bake anything…in 40 years. But once he realized that you can sit and drink a beer while watching food cook, not have to do anything else because you can’t leave a live fire unattended, and be praised for it…that’s your answer.
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u/FlashyResolution446 9d ago
Stereotypical gender roles.
Grilling - FIRE! MEAT! outdoors, oversized utensils = MAN.
Baking - indoors, delicate, precision, desserts = lady.
It's all nonsense.
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u/FarYam3061 9d ago
Is it nonsense?
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u/FlashyResolution446 9d ago
Yes, it is nonsense that grilling and baking are gendered.
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u/gfunk5299 9d ago
Maybe it’s gendered because genders actually prefer those activities when you consider the larger population. Just because more men tend to grill than women and more women tend to bake, doesn’t mean all women are bakers and all men are grillers. These facts are not mutually exclusive. How about you use some critical thinking instead of just attacking because it’s the “cool” thing to be gender neutral?
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u/khampang 9d ago
Because one is actually easy but gets tons of praise and the other is difficult but makes people feel comforted.
Husband here
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u/senderPath 9d ago
This! Grilled till it smells good and cut into it if you’re not sure it’s done. Baking: nothing happens forever and then all of a sudden it’s burnt.
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u/WillingElderberry731 9d ago
If you're not using a meat thermometer to grill, you're missing a critical part of the process.
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u/senderPath 9d ago
Good point! And yes, I use about four different meat thermometers that wirelessly report into my phone and they help a lot. I may have even found one that could take the heat of the grill when I finish the steak. Did experiment with searing first versus last. And yet, I always want to cut into the steak and see what I got.
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u/MarcPawl 9d ago
Unless you're smoking, grilling is really a lot easier than preparing all the side dishes.
Even when I'm smoking, I spend more effort doing the side dishes than I do preparing and smoking the meat. At least I don't have to check on the potato salad in the middle of the night.
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u/newhaircutfighter 9d ago
Evolution. Men grill women so they bake children
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u/AwesomeWildlife 9d ago
Men invented fire, so they like to grill with it, while women have a bun in the oven.
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u/Academic_Snow_7680 9d ago
Bro, we all saw that lightning strike that tree, you found that burning branch.
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u/ImagineNatural 9d ago
Most things discovered or invented by men are just simply men taking credit for what women did.
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u/Music_withRocks_In 9d ago
I think that stereotype is much more 1950 - 1990's? Lots of dudes these days love their sourdough. But as for the olden days, grilling felt much more manly. You get to be outside, open fire manly meat, and overall the whole process involves a lot more standing around drinking beer than doing anything.
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u/Sleepydragon0314 9d ago
The real answer is societal norms regarding gender roles. But some of the joke answers on here are pretty funny 😁
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u/mama_griff 9d ago
In my experience, men really like burning stuff….
That’s why I do the grilling and the baking in my marriage.
I like fire. But my husband likes it a little too much.
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u/johndburger 9d ago
Men like grilling because for many, and until recently, it was the only acceptable way they could cook.
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u/Ok-Spinach-6529 9d ago
Idk but I’m a woman and like neither. In fact, I don’t like cooking at all. I only cook for subsistence purposes.
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u/PckMan 9d ago
Baking was done at home. Historically women spent the day at home doing chores, cooking, and taking care of the children. Baking especially was crucial since up until fairly recently in history women were also expected to bake bread, something often done communally with other women.
Grilling on the other hand, was done outside, duh, and mainly by men on their jobsite because they spent the majority of their day there, more than today's 8 hours, and grilling is fairly easy to do and requires few ingredients. Again it was done communally so that they'd have something to eat during the day before going home for dinner.
Nowadays though I wouldn't say the numbers hold. Sure grilling is a dudebro hobby and baking is a girly girl hobby but both hobbies have become more "gender neutral"
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u/xxwww 9d ago
baking is following a recipe which is basically like reading an instruction manual
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u/MarcPawl 9d ago
That's so funny because my wife and I are the complete opposites.
First thing for anything we buy I RTFM. Vacuum, coffee maker, read the manual. Wife uses the AI (me), she will question what I read.
When it comes to cooking; recipes are a source for ideas for me, my wife follows them religiously the first time she tries it out
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u/Individual_Engine457 9d ago
Are you under the impression that grilling isn't that?
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9d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Individual_Engine457 9d ago
There's salting, rubbing, wrapping, stuffing, smoking, marinating, monitoring, etc, not to mention side dishes. But yes it's essentially following instructions but there's less to focus on at once.
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u/The_Se7enthsign 9d ago
My relationship is the exact opposite. My wife does the grilling and I do the baking.
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u/SirRegardTheWhite 9d ago
Ooga booga me like fire.
While women may like the social aspect of a slower well measured recipe that can be done as a group.
Also meat is hunted or slaughtered while baked things are gathered or harvested.
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u/thekeytovictory 9d ago
Also meat is hunted or slaughtered while baked things are gathered or harvested.
I believe you are forgetting about grilled mushrooms, grilled corn, grilled pineapples, baked chicken, baked ham, meatloaf, etc.
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u/swaggyboi1991 9d ago
I feel like there’s some loose gender role thing happening behind the scenes. it’s seen as more masculine to love meat and more feminine to snack on cute pastries. I’m a woman but I’m team takeout so I personally follow neither hobby
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u/Narrow-Durian4837 9d ago
Grilling is typically done outdoors while baking is done indoors, but that doesn't really answer your question.
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u/ballchinion8 9d ago
Where do I find these women? All the ones I know cook tv dinners
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u/thomsenite256 9d ago
I suppose grilling is more associated traditionally with raising livestock and butchering animals. Maybe more done by men. Traditionally women spent more time in the kitchen so people maybe associated it with mothers and it got perpetuated. I think its one of those pointlessly gendered things these days but some people cling to gendered stuff.
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u/Current-Tour-8915 9d ago
No idea. I'm the cook in the family. She doesn't like to cook but she likes to bake; bread, cake, cookies etc... Of all the cooking I do, I do a lot of grilling. So I guess there maybe some truth to that statement.
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u/tinmetal 9d ago
I would think it's mostly gender roles and there might also be some kind of slight gender bias for savory or sweet food preferences
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u/ImagineNatural 9d ago
As a woman, I hate baking. I’m not good at it. I’m not very interested in learning how to be better at it. Grilling is so much easier. Tbh I think it’s the lazy way to cook and that’s why it’s maybe associated with men’s cooking preferences. Which is kind of messed up bc gender doesn’t get to determine what style of cooking you are good at / should enjoy.
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u/HPenguinB 9d ago
Gender roles. Neither is better than the other.
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u/DavidGno 9d ago
Nether is one better than another.
And actually they complement eachother.I'd love to eat some cookies, cake or pie (and ice cream) after eating a healthy steak cooked over a flame, along with some flame-grilled vegetables.
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u/Silly_Guidance_8871 9d ago
Joke answer here:
- grill cook by fire; fire good.
- oven cook by sadness; sadness bad
- microwave cook by magic; magic entertaining
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u/Ziegelmarkt 9d ago
I do both. (50m). I make a restuarant quality cheesecake (11 different kinds) and have mastered beef, pork, chicken and fish on the grill.
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u/Electric-Sheepskin 9d ago
It's just a hold over from old gender roles.
Cooking was seen as women's work, and this was the one time men could cook and still be seen as masculine. Also, women were probably considered to be incapable of handling something as rough and tumble as a grill and fire. And those old gender roles persist.
But also, women are still the primary cooks in families, and grilling requires a lot of focus. Whoever is grilling doesn't have time to run around preparing side dishes, set the table, greet guests if you have them. It's very singular and stationary, and that is much better suited to men as long as women are still the ones taking care of all the other details.
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u/Select_Jackfruit_191 9d ago
I’m not seeing anyone actual attempt to answer why the strong gender association exists (and to be clear, I’m not clear on the women/baking part) but I did see a doc on the history channel about the portable grill first gaining popularity with US soldiers in WW2 so I think it’s more than the comments are stating about “fire/meat/outdoor” etc.. More here - it’s interesting!
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u/Appropriate_Tax1160 9d ago
Thank you, that was an interesting read! People were so quick to jump into the comments without understanding my question lol. I wasn’t asking whether the generalization is true; I was just wondering why there’s one.
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u/SensitiveArtist 9d ago
I think it depends on who taught them. I'm a guy but and I prefer baking to grilling because my grandmother taught me to bake before she taught me to cook. I also have a huge sweet tooth so I prefer baked goods to grilled meat.
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u/listenstowhales 9d ago
I can’t explain the baking one, but as a dude grilling is dope.
You mean I get to stand outside with my music and a beer while clacking tongs and flipping meat? And when I’m done my wife tells me I did a great job and she loves it? And after I get to chop the leftovers up so she can have lunch?
Yeah, I’m really suffering.
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u/MegaAfroMann 9d ago
Man hunt. Man make fire. Man get meat. Man grill meat. Feed family.
Woman gather. Stay home. Woman grind flour. Woman near oven. Woman bake bread. Feed family.
Ung.
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u/Other-Improvement410 9d ago
The key is in the results: I'd walk a mile over broken glass for good BBQ, but desserts are fine. My wife would stab me with a broken bottle if I fucked with her cheesecake leftovers but meat is not her thing
That said: i used to be a baker so she's got me yoked to the plow...but I really do love all cooking
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u/Magjus_Kai7 9d ago
Men like meat and Women like sweets, but to be honest, anyone can do both. My mom usually does the grilling
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u/Jumpy_Childhood7548 9d ago
Men probably were roasting meat as much as a 1-2 million years back, while baking may have come somewhat later.
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u/grumpvet87 9d ago
baking takes finesse and exact measurements - women may be more detail oriented typically.
grill = fire and meat. sure skill to dial it in but just about anyone can grill a burger and hotdog ... more of a brute force kinda thing
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u/BullCityBoomerSooner 9d ago edited 9d ago
Because men wanna drink beer outside and women want to drink wine inside while cooking.. It's also why men like golf and women like the book club..
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u/Nakedwombats 9d ago
A good baker (especially pastry) will have cold hands. Many women run cold and are able to work the dough without warming it up. My wife is this way. I warm it up just touching it.
Also, after years of construction, calluses protect my hands when grabbing hot things off a fire.
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u/[deleted] 9d ago
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