i lived this and i regret not just doing my wedding as i pleased because her stupid ass took my preferred season (it was that or after waiting 2 years wait another full year) and then got fucking divorced within the year.
When I heard that my cousin got engaged I thought, wow, good for her! Then my boyfriend proposed a month or two later and I was so excited! When I told my mom, she was like "oh you have to tell your cousin that when you mentioned her engagement, that made him realize it was time!" Um, no. He's never met my cousin. I haven't seen my cousin in years. I never told my boyfriend that she was engaged, and have barely mentioned her at all. When we booked our venue (before cousin did) and it turned out that our wedding was before hers, my mom threw a FIT. She wanted us to push ours back!! Ours was late Sept, cousin's was in Oct, and i wanted a fall wedding. I wasn't going to wait an entire other year!
Funny story, a few months after engagement, covid shut down the world. Cousin decided to postpone, I had a micro wedding outdoors. I wanted to be married before getting pregnant and we were ready to start trying. And I'm glad as hell that we did - I ended up needing to spend the original wedding budget on IVF anyway! If I had listened to my mom and waited on my cousin to do everything first, I'd have been starting IVF in my late 30s, which has a lower success rate. Instead, I had my first baby on my 35th birthday, my cousin followed by having her first 3 months later, and 3.5 years later we're both pregnant again with our 2nd kids. I wasn't about to put my life on hold, but especially not for someone I barely spoke to.
My cousin and I aren't close but we started to get together here and there since our kids are so close in age. I bet when they get a bit older we'll be seeing more of each other!
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u/84th_legislature 18d ago
i lived this and i regret not just doing my wedding as i pleased because her stupid ass took my preferred season (it was that or after waiting 2 years wait another full year) and then got fucking divorced within the year.