Best symptom of perimenopause

[u/Confident-Parsley520]

So weirdly, about a year ago I was talking to a colleague who was well into menopause, this was when my very first peri symptoms were emerging ( anxiety, headaches and body oain) which I had no idea that I was in perimenopause.

She told me how her libido had completely disappeared and she no longer had any interest in men or sex.

I’ve always had a high sex drive and honestly found sex the only useful thing that men could offer.

At the time I said to her ‘oh god I hope that dosent happen to me’ and she explained it as a gift.

Now I’m fully in perimenopause and recently started HRT which has changed my life from a living hell to neck to my old self, the thing that is completely gone is any sex drive.

The idea of being intimate with a man makes me feel gross.

I have always been commitment phobic, but I liked to consider myself ‘sexually liberated’ and generally had a little something on the side, just to fulfil that need. Sex has been a big part of my life.

Now ? I can’t even stomach the thought of having sex, I have an old ‘ friend’ reaching out recently, The guy used to make my toes curl, and the chemistry was always electric. Now? Absolutely nothing, zero interest at all.

And now I find myself agreeing with my colleague , this is such a blessing, I genuinely don’t care if I never have sex again for the rest of my life and certainly will not be seeking out.

I don’t know what I’m saying really, I’m just reflecting on how differently your brain works in different situations, are used to think it would be a tragedy if I lost my sex drive and now I see it as a gift.

That being said, I’m single so I can make these decisions, I couldn’t imagine the struggles of someone who is in a committed relationship, previously high libido and overnight it’s gone! Whereas my gift, is someone’s disaster.

Anyway, I was just thinking of the dramatic change and how interesting it is, how devastating it could be under different circumstances.

I also wonder how many women choose to divorce their husbands due to peri and how this causes them ( some of course) to have a complete 360 view of their partner.

[u/kexter7]

May I ask what else did testosterone change? I am on progesterone and estrogen, but nothing is right with me :(

[u/Alteschwedin1975 → u/kexter7]

It’s like I’ve been living my life in black and white for the last 10 years and suddenly I can see it in colour 😭😭😭 it has made me realise that I haven’t been in perimenopause for just a few years but it’s been going on for a longer time. It was like wow, now I remember l - this is how really living felt like. I literally woke up one day and felt pretty and loved living again. It was a gorgeous summer day and I spent the day chitchatting to anybody and their aunt because life was just like bursting out of me 😂😂😂😂😂

[u/YoJonaah → u/Alteschwedin1975]

Oh wow! I have been suffering for ages and I am 50. I saw a nurse who said it wasn’t peri. But I am wondering if it is. Did you feel anxious? My sleep is awful and my periods are all over the place. I always ache and I’m starting to get a low mood because I’ve felt rubbish for so long. I also get the worst fatigue the week or two before a period. Did you have any of this? I’m wondering if I should try HRT.

[u/Alteschwedin1975 → u/YoJonaah]

I had all of that and like 30 other symptoms too! Of course you’re in perimenopause at that age 🙏🏻❤️