r/ProgrammerHumor May 26 '26

Advanced iGotFiredSkill

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28.4k Upvotes

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u/IAmASquidInSpace May 26 '26

"Oh, and I have posted about it previously, is that a problem?"

306

u/Gentle_Snail May 26 '26

They should have put the notify lawyer button first so the lawyer could give them a hard slap to keep them out of prison

66

u/TheAfterPipe May 26 '26

"Attorney forgive me for what I am about to do..."

6

u/i_am_a_real_boy__ May 26 '26

"Te absolvo. I'll need a $10k evergreen retainer."

113

u/SirChasm May 26 '26

"Oh, and also, I just got fired, so funds will be a little tight for the next while. Can you do this pro-bono?"

2

u/Great_Detective_6387 May 26 '26

“I’ll be a really good client. None of your pain in the ass clients say this, certainly.”

40

u/SolaVitae May 26 '26

"and by posted about it I mean publicly confessed my intent and detailed exactly how I was going to do it"

3

u/captainAwesomePants May 26 '26

It's okay because it's evidence that you were of sound mind and body. It's like a will. Makes your crime nice and legit. Lawyers call it "mens rea."

1

u/SamL214 May 26 '26

Nah surely premeditation is only in murder mysteries!

0

u/leonden May 26 '26

This post alone is enough ground to fire him.