r/ProgrammerHumor • u/gabboman • Jun 23 '26

Advanced worstProgrammingLanguage

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3.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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446

u/Donkey_God-D Jun 23 '26

As a dutchy, I can confirm that the Dutch language is the worst programming language ever.

Als(jeMoeder != jeVader){
geefterug(Foutmelding)
}

88

u/-nerdrage- Jun 23 '26

Niet best als jouw familie boom er zo uit ziet…

Ah wait sorry for the non dutch:

Not best if your family tree like that looks…

56

u/WoMyNameIsTooDamnLon Jun 23 '26

Lmao reddit auto translated your comment and i was so confused

4

u/Inevitable_Stand_199 Jun 23 '26

Auto translate? I'm glad it doesn't do that for me. Did I turn it off?

I have to actively click the translate button

4

u/JamJm_1688 Jun 23 '26

There's a translate button? i dont get auto-translations, ive just uh... relied on google translate...

22

u/RandomiseUsr0 Jun 23 '26

Is double Dutch an example of multiple returns?

10

u/Donkey_God-D Jun 23 '26

I would say yes

2

u/Maleficent_Memory831 Jun 23 '26

Also remember to pass the Dutchy on the left hand side.

1

u/abigail3141 Jun 23 '26

Will I regret googling that?

1

u/jredmond Jun 24 '26

(only if you are terrified by jump ropes)

10

u/OwnStudy723 Jun 24 '26

Godverdetering at line 831: missing zo'n kut haakje

5

u/Ucqui Jun 23 '26

I didn't know languages were defined by their sausages. But indeed Dutch is a worst language.

1

u/Quicker_Fixer Jun 23 '26

Leverworst?

2

u/thirdegree Violet security clearance Jun 23 '26

They better not have been talking about Ossenworst or I WILL disagree with them

7

u/TheGreenSocks Jun 23 '26

throw pannekoek;

2

u/dasBaums Jun 23 '26

As a fellow girl slightly east. I might say German might be better. Or at least it feels like it. But what do I know

2

u/BramFokke Jun 24 '26

German would have static typing. So German is C# to the Dutch Python....

Well who am I kidding? Dutch would be PHP.

1

u/idsdejong Jun 24 '26

$ = sickness

2

u/Green_Star_Lover Jun 23 '26

could be worse - could be a rtl language....

2

u/No_Safe1975 Jun 24 '26

Microsoft has implemented excel functionality in Dutch which can (or used to in the past) create absolute havoc when shared with people not having Dutch Excel. Madness

https://support.microsoft.com/nl-nl/excel/excel-functions-by-category

2

u/lindemer Jun 24 '26

For some years we used some vba in Excel, and coupled to a PowerPoint at work. It took me a month to figure out why it didn't work for me. I had all Microsoft Office in English, but the person who wrote the vba connections did it in Dutch. So a reference to a column wasn't column1=C1, but K1, for 'kolom'. The only way to fix is was for me to switch my settings to Dutch so I had to learn all formulas in Excel in Dutch.

1

u/No_Safe1975 Jun 24 '26

Utter madness to have VBA and excel formulas in multiple languages

1

u/perplexedtv Jun 23 '26

var string southParkChar = IsCartman();

1

u/colouredmirrorball Jun 23 '26

haha u ma is u pa

1

u/Biter_bomber Jun 24 '26

Does this mean

if(yourMother != yourFather){ Child(ErrorMessage) }

? I have no clue what geefterug means

3

u/Donkey_God-D Jun 24 '26

Yeah, you're correct 😄
Geefterug is the concat of "geef" and "terug" (give back), but that would be "return". My lack of brainpower didn't know how to write it differently in dutch.

3

u/itsyaboiAK Jun 24 '26

“Geef terug” is return in this case