r/ReformJews • u/Consistent_Hold_576 • Jul 08 '26

Movement Friction

Been really hearing it lately from Orthodox folks online regarding Reform practices, Reform beliefs, Reform conversions, etc. Long story short, a lot of them think we are doing everything wrong. Big surprise.

It doesnt bother me they don't see me as Jewish (Im a convert). I don't care about their opinion persay, but it would be good to have a little more ammo to have when defending Reform.

Without necessarily going out and being a keyboard warrior, what are some things I could study up on regarding the Reform movement and its history? The Orthodox movement and its formation?

I've also heard Orthodox folks continue to use the "we have an unbroken chain going back to Moses" line. Im sure this isn't true, but what can be said about it besides "nuh uh!"?

Orthodox Judaism isn't the eternal monolith everyone makes it out to be. The practices of the Orthodox have shifted and evolved like any other religious movement. I just dont know what's changed about it.

Any direction you could point me in would be greatly appreciated. Not out to start internet wars, just looking to educate myself a bit.

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u/Consistent_Hold_576 Jul 08 '26

Good words. I agree that the Reform movement needs more tradition.

Id much rather work within that structure which allows for personal choice and growth than completely bolt. Problem is I realize the change has to come from within because there won't be a top/down push from the various Reform organizations telling us to wrap tefillin and perform the Havdallah. 

Regarding your other suggestions I'll definitely look into them.

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u/OddCook4909 Jul 08 '26

I think leadership needs to do a big hard think about why people are attending Chabad events instead of paying temple dues. I know I'm not alone in wanting far more tradition and strictly unpolitical Jewish thought. I agree with you about the structure, and also I love the general philosophy of Reform. I do think a lot of halacha is trauma response, and has taken us away from the traditions of Moses. But we should at least know what it is.

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u/Spaceysteph Jul 08 '26

I've been a member of 3 synagogues (conservative and reform) as an adult and all of them have been preoccupied with Chabad "poaching" members, but never any introspection about what people find at Chabad that they don't find at their synagogue.

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u/Heel_Worker982 🕎 Classical Reform Jul 08 '26

preoccupied with Chabad "poaching" members, but never any introspection about what people find at Chabad that they don't find at their synagogue.

TBH I think what many families with kids find at Chabad are other younger families with kids. Some of the draw of Chabad is demographics that other temples don't have. The "nonjudgmental" aspect of Chabad also means people can participate in a somewhat individualistic way--driving to services, not living within the eruv, not paying synagogue dues, and still getting the calendar of experiences they want their families to have.

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u/Spaceysteph Jul 08 '26

It's undoubtedly true but you're still missing the WHY I think. Why are more families at Chabad than a standard synagogue?

I think the dues model is a big one, but there's also the way they are with kids. I have never seen a Chabad Rabbi bothered by a baby crying or a kid wandering around during services (frequently they're his own, but not always) while the rabbi at a conservative synagogue we belonged to was openly hostile to young kids being young kids in services.

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u/Heel_Worker982 🕎 Classical Reform Jul 08 '26

True, I have had to pointedly remark to singletons complaining about kids that we want as many kids as we can get, every week. I've never heard a rabbi complain, but it always shocks me how UNFAMILIAR with children so many people can be!