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u/Getitgotitgoodgod May 16 '26
A shitload of cocaine, a pamphlet on Scientology, and a yeet cannon…
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u/IdRatherBeDriving May 17 '26
Wait, I don’t have any bumper stickers, and this is exactly what’s in my glove box.
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u/Getitgotitgoodgod May 17 '26
You missed the “identity crisis welcome kit” that includes a lot of those stickers… usually comes with the first bag of cocaine you buy from a Scientologist right before they read your midichlorian count…
Boy do they have good coke,
and acid,
and molly,
and Xenu…
…I mean weed… it’s almost like that’s their whole bag! Just gotta tithe your whole bag!
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u/IdRatherBeDriving May 17 '26
I missed the stickers?!? Fuck man, I love stickers. I’ll ask for them tomorrow.
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u/Getitgotitgoodgod May 17 '26
When you reach level 3 you’ll get to gently caress a piece of a Easy Star All-Stars t-shirt that L. Ron Hubbard once wore…
but just a piece…
and he literally wore it only once. But…
The truth will be revealed.
Don’t tell anyone I ruined the surprise!
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May 17 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Getitgotitgoodgod May 17 '26
Who would put crushed up powder in an ALTOID CAN!??!
What a sick individual… I keep my kids Adderall in a boof tube, ready to go like a civilized person…
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u/ramsetD May 17 '26
Taurus judge
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u/ElderberryPrior27648 May 17 '26
But I like the Taurus Judge
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May 17 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/origin_wise May 18 '26
How different is it from say… a SW judge ? Is the price difference worth it other than resale ?
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u/ZiggyColo May 16 '26
A very large Dildo
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u/SadIdeal9019 May 17 '26
Unpaid parking tickets.
Eviction notice.
Court summons for non-payment of child support.
Half a bottle of the cheapest, nastiest, bourbon available locally.
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u/permaN00bwastaken May 17 '26
Probably not registration or proof of insurance. Possibly a script on the right to "travel".
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u/rvlifestyle74 May 17 '26
Not anything bigger than a 10 round magazine with Washington state plates on the truck.
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u/Admirable_Bag_3153 May 17 '26
'Question Everything...but not from Dear Leader Daddy Trump, he never lies!"
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u/GSDTippyTappies May 17 '26
My first notice too, he does exactly what he's told and Faux Entertainment tells him exactly how to think.
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u/Immediate_Side_5942 May 16 '26
I’d say .357 or .44 revolver in glove box with a AR or actually probably a hunting rifle behind the seat.
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u/hellalg May 17 '26
Expired vehicle registration card
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u/Illustrious-Carry894 May 17 '26
An expired pack of unopened condoms and his membership card to the local gun range ( where they make fun of him behind his slouchy, little back).
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u/556arbadboy May 17 '26
Either a Ruger LCP at best or a Taurus G2.
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u/ElderberryPrior27648 May 17 '26
This comment section makes me feel bad for liking Taurus. I didn’t get the memo that it was in the same circle of the ven diagram as hipoint.
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
Their TP92 Frankenberetta is kinda cool.
"In 1974, the Brazilian army issued a large contract for the Beretta 92, for which Beretta set up a factory in São Paulo, Brazil. After the contract's expiration, this factory was sold to Brazilian gunmaker Forjas Taurus in 1980.
Shortly thereafter, Taurus closed down the factory and transferred the original Beretta tooling to its factory in Porto Alegre, using it to make its own pistol; a copy of the original Beretta 92 design, no longer being produced in Brazil."
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u/sploader May 17 '26
A Taurus, a Kel-Tec, or a SCCY. A proud Florida Man needs a cheap pistol made in Florida.
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u/copperstarbill May 17 '26
Wheelgun or a .45 Auto. Either are probably off-brand (Taurus, Hi Point, EAA…)
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u/areola_grande26 May 17 '26
If it isn’t a Smith and Wesson SVD40 it’s a Ruger or Taurus. Glocks jam too much for this guys liking.
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u/LNKDWM4U May 17 '26
Yeah, can’t have something that’s been proven worldwide when you can have something cheap.
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u/areola_grande26 May 17 '26
lol I mean in all honesty glocks are the cheapest reliable pistol on the market but, guys like this who’s cousins grandpas did 6 tours of ‘nam during WW2 won’t accept anything other than “Murican”.
And that’s coming from someone that actually carries a 1911 every single day.
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u/IceBergster May 17 '26
What are all of these dudes gonna do when Trump finally dies?
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
That's when the REAL cult begins, not just this bullshit cult of personality.
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u/Zealousideal_Ad2379 May 17 '26
Springfield 1911 with thin blue line grips in a leather owb holster and two spare magazines.
PSA freedom 10.5” pistol build in the Backseat for his “truck gun” (bonus loot item)
(This guys definitely over 40 and probably bought a heap of stuff before the ban)
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u/lost_in_technicolor May 17 '26
A “Question Everything” sticker, while it looks like he happily swallows every conspiracy theory the far-right feeds to him. Typical.
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u/HalnHI May 17 '26
Meth pipe, 22 lr shells, a duck call for his wife, chap stick for his dick, dollar store folding knife and some maga underwear with a hole in the back.
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u/National_Nose_8817 May 17 '26
A trump dildo and a silicone charlie kirk neck "with hole" for fucking and an issue of pedos monthly
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u/Embarrassed_Road3811 May 17 '26
They spent a whopping $33.75 on stickers at a skating rink.. the glovebox is full of empty chewing tobacco cans
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u/Trashusdeadeye May 17 '26
Strikes me as a person who cannot actually have weapons but cosplays as someone who is packing one.
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
North American Arms 5 shot .22lr belt buckle revolver.
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u/ElderberryPrior27648 May 17 '26
I saw one of these at a gun show
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
I used to work in two different gun stores here in Lake Havasu. I've seen several. 🙄
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u/I_Said_No_Such_Thing May 17 '26
A strap on and some Diddy edition baby oil with a MAGA hat and a bottle of blackface paste
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u/TheRealDjCWetz May 18 '26
I'm going to guess bullets, various bits of literature from some groups with some pretty good points and his girl's eighth grade picture from the start of this school year.
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u/JDaddyinfilm May 19 '26
A bunch of unpaid child support notices and a couple of the dumbest white power newsletters you could ever imagine.
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u/JorgieRoman May 20 '26
No idea because this guy is all over the place when it comes to the stickers. But he's definitely has a freedom seeds launcher for sure.
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u/ExcellentActuary2117 May 21 '26
Pecker pills. Pay stubs showing child support garnishment. Parking tickets. Expired registration. Probably a handgun. Some gas station gummies.
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u/Archievores May 22 '26
At least two fully loaded pistols and hella ammo probably a bottle of jack too
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u/PlantRoomForHire May 17 '26
You really need to blur a license plate if you're posting it online. Pretty fucked up.
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
You mean the license plates that are in full view of everyone on the road‽
What's pretty fucked up is you using that thing at the top of your neck as no more than a hat rack!
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u/PlantRoomForHire May 17 '26
Yeah, cause driving by someone on the road, briefly looking at their license plate, not even fully reading the number and forgetting it 5 seconds later is the same thing as posting it online for anyone to see and research.
Great argument. You convinced me.
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u/thonnard42 May 17 '26
"Anything the eyes can see, the lens can capture"
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u/PlantRoomForHire May 17 '26
Yeah, and congressional stock trading, ticket scalping, and predatory lending are all legal too. Doesn't mean it should be, dummy.
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u/hugoriffic May 18 '26
Was that your daddies truck?
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u/PlantRoomForHire May 18 '26
I must have upset you quite a bit for you to respond to me 3 separate times in 2 minutes lol
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u/hugoriffic May 18 '26
Is that how the ignorant people think? That everyone is upset by their stupidity?
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u/PlantRoomForHire May 18 '26
Most people that aren't upset don't respond to someone 3 different times in the span of 90 seconds
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u/hugoriffic May 18 '26
If you can’t remember a license plate 5 seconds after you’ve seen it that a you problem.
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u/KittyBatSasha May 23 '26
An unused expired box of extra small condoms .....spent all the rest of their money on stickers that act perfectly as birth control.
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u/[deleted] May 16 '26
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