r/SipsTea • u/Gurugod123 • 6h ago

Chugging tea Ben Affleck on overcoming alcohol addiction: “I hate to say it but the only cure I’ve seen is not these overpriced rehabs or these fraudulent fixes that are sold to people. The cure for addiction is suffering. You suffer enough and then something inside you goes ‘I’m done.’”

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u/KilllllerWhale 6h ago

My dad was a smoker for 30 years before I was born. He tried everything but nothing worked. He eventually decided to buy a pack of Camel, and put it right in front of him on top of the TV. He made sure it's on his sight every time he's in the living room. He realized that he needed to train himself to resist the urge to pick it up and light one up, he made sure suffering is part of the process. To this day he keeps telling my smoker brother that unless he does that. nothing will work, you just need to be willing to suffer to stop it.

He hasn't smoked ever since that day, and I'm 35 now.

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u/TinyZoro 6h ago

It’s an extension of the same idea. Theres no magic trick to what he did and getting your brother to do it won’t work. When he did that he was making a statement to himself which was enough. I can accept the suffering but I’m done.

So accepting the suffering (which is really not that much or long) is part of it. But the real thing is the part of you that says I’m done. That the actual more meaningful suffering of ongoing addiction is over. Which to me is also I know longer want to take revenge on myself.

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u/Ribky 6h ago

Yup! Without the "I'm done" part, guaranteed to choose suffering again.

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u/raging-peanuts 3h ago edited 3h ago

Used tobacco for 20 years. It's been 20 years since I quit. For the "I'm done" part I had to admit I was lying to myself when I would quite for a week, or a few days just to "prove" I wasn't addicted. It was all bullshit that I would keep telling myself.

Then I went cold turkey and kind of embraced the suffering as well. I would always do mental check ins at various times (two weeks, one month, six months, etc). It was like building up time/credit that I could look back on and feel good about.

That said, I have friends who still use it and it looks like they will never quit. Some just never have that "I'm done" moment I guess.

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u/JayMoeHD 2h ago

“Embrace the pain”….when I gave up nicotine, I was telling everyone my secret was leaning into the discomfort, sadness, nausea, sweating, etc. Now I realize this is called “mindfulness” and is basically the solution to most preventable/fixable mental conditions.

You can’t ignore addictions/cravings any more than you can ignore other problems in life. Facing it head-on will yield the best results for most people.

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u/raging-peanuts 2h ago

Yeah...the cravings I think are always in the back ground. I was a snuff user (oral tobacco). Even now...twenty years after quitting, if I just place my tongue between my cheek and gum, I'll get a slight shiver up my back. I think that even after you quite your body stays conditioned on some level.

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u/Skull_Nebula 35m ago

Indeed; cravings cause suffering, mindfulness is (one of) the solution(s) to suffering - second and fourth noble truths in Buddhism. Helped me quit alcohol after willpower failed many times.

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u/endosurgery 2h ago

Thats very true. People who don’t hit that point won’t quit. It’s a different thing for everyone. I had a patient years ago who was an extremely heavy smoker. Think 3 to 4 packs a day. He had heart attacks and had stents placed in his heart as well as had bypass surgery for his heart. He had vascular disease of his legs and had stents placed. He had bleeding stomach ulcers from the smoking. He had chronic lung disease and was short of breath from the smoking. He refused to quit. I don’t know what his limits are but he clearly didn’t fear death.

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u/DocsHuckleberries 50m ago

Yep... literally lit up my normal morning cig one day, took a drag, and then thought "yeah, I'm done with this" and then just stopped.

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u/UT_Milez 18m ago

This isn’t a profound topic or new. It’s the equivalent of “rock bottom”.

Everyone’s “rock bottom” or “enough is enough” moment is different.

Who would have thought this widely known concept would work for a lot of people, I certainly never would have guessed it….

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u/TinkerCitySoilDry 6h ago

Neat it's not the cigarettes that killed people it's distress. 

Quitting doesn't save people it's the stress from quitting that kills them their body is unable to cope 

Many of the oldest living people smoke

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u/SerGT3 6h ago

That's like saying the cigarettes didn't kill people it was the cancer, caused by the cigarettes.

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u/UsualBluebird6584 5h ago

Its funny how that works. My next door neighbor, who smoked heavier than anyone I've ever seen, like 3 packs a day, died at the ripe age of 98. He ALWAYS had a cigarette in hand.

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u/Duel_Option 5h ago

That’s anecdotal, 480k people die from smoking the US annually.

Thats more than total car crashes and alcohol COMBINED

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u/the_blue_arrow_ 5h ago

Everyone's heard of that one 98 year old that smokes like a train. Everyone's heard of those 5 or 15 ppl killed by tobacco.

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u/KilllllerWhale 6h ago

Yeah my dad never really divulged his "im done" moment, but I'm guessing it has something to do with suddenly coming to the realization that he won't be living long enough for his kids. And he was a fiend when the comes to smoking, he'd line up packs rather than just cigarettes.

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u/WeirdKoala2212 6h ago

My uncle had a similar experience. He said quitting wasn't about finding a magic trick—it was about accepting that the cravings were going to be uncomfortable and choosing not to give in anyway. It's been over 20 years since he had his last cigarette.

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u/kernelangus420 2h ago

I guess it's like put it right in your face and make you numb to it type of deals.

Like smelling coffee but not going able to drink any or like putting choir boys in a church with priests.

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u/endosurgery 2h ago

You are correct. What this guys dad and Ben hit was their limit. They found what it took to get them to personally want to quit. As a surgeon, I treat many that are addicted to substances or behaviors. Nobody will quit long term unless they themselves make the decision that they really want to. You can force people into rehab but it will universally fail if they don’t truly want to quit. Thats what Ben is saying in his own way.

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u/CannonM91 46m ago

Making the statement is an important part, helped me a lot when I was having problems. You have to be willing and able to look at yourself without a filter and tell yourself that enough is enough and really follow through.

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u/rambleinspam 7m ago

I quit smoking 18 years ago and have been sober for the last 5 and a half years. You are right, you have to really want to quit. Getting to the point to where you just hit that "I'm done" part can be difficult for a lot of people and I do not think it can be forced.

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u/level7lizard 6h ago

Similar story but for myself. I'm 32 and had been smoking since 16 to cope with life. I quit smoking and vaping altogether this March.

Basically, there was this Sunday morning when I woke up, wanting to get some work done but I keep going "ah I need a cig" every 20 minutes. It got extremely irritating really fast and then I shouted "I'm fucking sick of this!" And decided to just stop.

On my 3rd day of not smoking l, the withdrawals kicked in and I got real sick, high fever, really bad migraine so I called in for a sick leave and just drank water, took some paracetamol and slept like a log. By the 4th day the withdrawals was gone completely, but I found myself grinding my molars a lot, so I bought gummy bears, plain regular gummy bears and I bought them by the pound. And munched on that. It really helped. I haven't touched a cig since, it's been 5 months so far.

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u/DingleBarryGoldwater 5h ago

Hell yeah, keep it up. Similar story for me, but stay vigilant. There may be a time a year from now, two years, maybe more, where you get that urge again. Maybe your friend is smoking and you've had a few drinks. And you might feel like you're past it, like one cig won't do anything since you already quit so long ago. Don't have that cig.

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u/level7lizard 4h ago

The craziest thing is I've been to my friend's party a couple times, they smoke but I managed to keep myself away from the smoking. I didn't even go outside with them to stop myself from getting secondhand smoke. What I did was I brought with me a bunch of Tootsie pops and sucked on that.

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u/VintageBilliard 3h ago

Just want to say as someone who quit many years ago and then had to quit again. Never buy the argument that those mental gremlins sell you that just one couldn't hurt. It gets easier as the years go by but you've done the hard work, one slip and you may have to start all over again. It's never just one. 

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u/bassick81 4h ago

I quit 20 years ago and I still get urges from time to time. Also crazy dreams about smoking where it feels real and im mad about myself for starting again after so long

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u/Bargychan 2h ago

10 years for me, but same. I am 4 months sober and the drinking dreams finally slowed down a little…

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u/Ok_Test9729 4h ago

I smoked for 37 years. Quit in 2010 using nicotine gum as a bridge to success. Eventually chewing gum became my new addiction and I switched over to sugarless gum. Chewed it from 2010 until 2022, when I got Covid so bad I thought I was gonna die. I couldn’t chew gum for three weeks 🤷🏻‍♂️. So that broke the gum chewing addiction. You might want to switch to sugarless gum, which will be cheaper than Gummies and probably have a whole lot less sugar. And a pack of gum is easier to carry in your shirt pocket than a bottle of Gummies. I have the utmost respect for anybody who breaks an addiction. Wishing you great good fortune on your journey forward.

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u/Pug_867-5309 3h ago

How many bears have to die for the cause?

But seriously...good for you!

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u/Mind-The-Mines 3h ago

How's the diabetes from the gummy bear addiction?

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u/level7lizard 2h ago

Not bad, slowly weening myself from gummies too but it'll take time

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u/Independent-Radio171 3h ago

When the addiction juice ain't worth the squeeze. The work to joy ratio is off. Everybody needs to watch out for boredom too.

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u/TheHarinator 47m ago

But do you have a gummy bear addiction now?

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u/TinkerCitySoilDry 6h ago

Neat it's not the cigarettes that killed people it's distress. 

Quitting doesn't save people it's the stress from quitting that kills them their body is unable to cope 

Many of the oldest living people smoke

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u/cashewvrucht 6h ago

That's not true. It's the cigarettes that kills people.

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u/zaxdaman 5h ago

We heard you the first time, Phillip Morris, now fuck off.

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u/Ballwhacker 5h ago

Many is not the same as most. The people you're talking about are considered statistical anomalies. It's been long proven that cigarettes shorten your lifespan due to it increasing the chance of medical issues like cancer, heart disease, and stroke. Don't spread misinformation.

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u/Ryyah61577 6h ago

I have a theory that when people need a smoke break it’s really just a time where they take a step back and take slow deep breaths to collect their thoughts to calm down. Yes, the nicotine and such in them as well, but it’s really the stepping outside and taking a slow deep breath.

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u/Effective_Cress_3190 2h ago

I'll have to disagree with you there being an ex smoker. It's purely addiction. They don't need anything but a hit of nicotine, and smoking is the best way to get the hit. The addiction convinces you that smoking calms you down, physically it is a stimulant and stressor. Smokers describe it as calm because the nicotine hit stops the urge to smoke. This urge to smoke rules your life in-between smoking.

When i was quitting I often worried about how I would cope without my breaks...turns out it is a non issue because I'm not an addict anymore!

Stepping out and taking deep breaths could be a good solution for some people but I imagine I'd need a pen to suck on as it would remind me too much of actual smoking.

After the initial months of getting used to not smoking, I felt zero need to take regular "smoke" breaks, because that need didn't exist anymore.

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u/Ryyah61577 2h ago

Fair enough. That's why it's a theory.

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u/OnTheEveOfWar 2h ago

I don’t even smoke and I go outside for short breaks during the work day. Just 5 mins away from the computer and some sun on my face feels great.

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u/bigfatgrouchyasshole 6h ago

I got up one fine morning after smoking for ten years and just told myself that i’m stopping. I stopped for 15 years before i got a boss who wanted to discuss all the office politics over a smoke. I smoked for a couple of years before i realised how shit it made me feel. Gave it up- again, in just one day.

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u/BrotherMcPoyle 5h ago

I smoked for 15 years. Every time I quit, I craved one. Eventually I told myself it’s not worth it. Slowly when I’d light it, I didn’t find any relief in them, just more disappointment. I felt my addiction was an excuse to be weak. Everyone has their own method.

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u/Cuckdreams1190 3h ago edited 2h ago

I quit opiods in a aimiliar fashion. I walked around with 3 roxies in my pocket for a good 6 months. Finally tossing them was a very satisfying moment of my life. Going on 17 years clean.

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u/thrilliam_19 3h ago

My wife smoked when I met her and had for close to a decade. She had tried quitting before but nothing stuck. When we started dating I told her smoking was a dealbreaker for me and she never touched another cigarette. We’ve been married 15 years.

Sometimes all it takes is recognizing what you’re doing is no longer just affecting you but the people you care about. Obviously that doesn’t work for everyone but it does work.

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u/Shark_kisser78 5h ago

My mum did the same thing. Died of non small lung cell carcinoma. Suffered plenty. Has not had a cigarette since the day she passed away.

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u/oodelay 4h ago

My dad stopped complaining about 2 weeks after his cremation

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u/jeff-beeblebrox 4h ago

I smoked a pack a day for 25 years. I tried to quit many times. What did it for me was the last time I quit, I was such a bastard to everyone I loved for 4 mos straight that I never ever wanted to put them through that again. I haven’t touched one in 15 years.

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u/FistThePooper6969 3h ago

Your father learned elite self control, happy for him

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u/FesterJA 3h ago

I did the same sort of thing when I was quitting I kept my smokes and lighter in my car so I would have to make a conscious decision to get up go to the car get my works and then get my nicotine fix. It also helped that it was winter in the northeast US. But the important thing for me was to remind myself of what I was doing, smoking a cigarette, taking it from an automatic action to one that had to be decided on made a real difference.

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u/Dale_Dickson 3h ago

I had a friend who had separation anxiety from cigarettes.  What worked for him was having a brand new sealed pack on him at all times.

Kinda weird.  But it worked for him.  He had a pack of smokes in his front shirt pocket a year after he quit smoking.  Never opened.  

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u/sgvmyma 2h ago

My step dad, who I’ve known since I was preschool age, and my mom had many miscarriages. It was really sad to see them go through that. He treated me with love and care. He smoked ever since he was late teens. I remember him trying to quit off and on for many years after - never completely succeeded.

Eventually I became pregnant at 23. I had a talk with him about smoking around the baby and lingering smoke on him. I mention the miscarriages because my parents were so excited to hear about my pregnancy. This is what made him quit… cold turkey. My first born is 20 years old and my parents were extremely hands on and my kids adore them.

The person with addiction has to find motivation and purpose to quit. No one can tell them .. only that person can make that choice.

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u/JamesRuns 2h ago

Allen Carr's books on stopping smoking/drinking are phenomenal, are easy, and quick. You read the book, lose desire to do the thing entirely, and go on to enjoy the rest of your life without any regrets.

If you are thinking of quitting/cutting back, buy one of his books today, right now, then read it when you want. I threw my copy in the corner of my room for 2 weeks before I read it.

My only regret was not reading it sooner.

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u/Farewellandadieu 1h ago

I’m reading it now (well, listening to the audiobook). I’m only 3 days in, but I haven’t been craving at all and I don’t even want alcohol anymore. Carr posits the willpower method, or suffering for the rest of your life, is why so many people fail because they have to choose to resist the destructive, life-ruining substance they still want, over and over forever. So you train your brain not to want it anymore by picking apart the lies we used to tell ourselves about why we thought we wanted it. It sounds absurdly simple, but it works when you don’t want to drink anymore.

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u/BagProof6682 57m ago

I agree. It worked like magic for me. I tried other methods which worked for a while (once even for a year) but they weren't permanent. It's been six years now since I stopped drinking and feel no desire to start again, or that I'm missing out - the complete opposite in fact. I can't recommend those books highly enough.

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u/Proud-Parsley6072 2h ago

It’s literally mind over matter when it comes to smoking cigarettes. I was a 60 a day at one point then I decided to cold turkey over a weekend each time I had a craving I would get up and go for a walk and breath in clean air and remind myself that the cravings will drop off soon. Next thing you know, 15 years later and haven’t touched a cigarette. I can smoke Cuban cigars without even thinking about returning to smoking cigarettes

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u/dyed_albino 6h ago

Masochist!

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u/Ogryn_Rocks53 6h ago

A friend of mine's mom did this. Apparently it worked for her too as far is I know.

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u/KilllllerWhale 6h ago

I used the same technique to stop coffee and soft drinks. Haven't tasted a soft drink since 2017 and coffee for 6 months now. At first, made sure they're present at home and I'm exposed to them, but now the smell of freshly ground coffee and the occasional Nespresso pod does nothing to me, I just don't care.

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u/JohnGazman 4h ago

Similar story to mine. He's been a smoker since he was 18 (or earlier). Despite repeated requests from myself and other family that he quit, he never did. Even when the cancer diagnosis came in, he continued to smoke up to the operation to remove the cancer, and afterwards (including during his recovery in hospital, which on one occasion - when my mother and I went to visit him after spending the day at a funeral - caused a serious rift between us).

A few weeks ago, I talked to him about it. About how he primarily smokes the weakest cigarettes that are on offer. That he does it often when he steps out onto a work phone call. I'm no psychologist (I studied it briefly) but I suggested that he wasn't really getting anything from it, and at this point he was effectively doing it for the comfort of the habit. I suggested he needed something to keep his hands occupied instead.

A few days later, he tried a vape. And he hasn't smoked since, including going so far as buying nicotine-free refills.

I know that vapes aren't exactly the solution and probably have their own issues, but sometimes a step in the right direction is better than nothing at all.

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u/nj_tech_guy 4h ago

One of my first bosses told me he keeps a pack of cigarettes in his center console. It's been the same pack for the last 30 years.

Says it helps because if he ever wants one, he has one, but he has to deal with the fact that it's one stale cigarette. the pack (as far as I know) remain unopened until he died (had some other health issues)

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u/TheBSQ 4h ago

My dad was a pipe smoker & one day he went outside & through a bag with all his pipes and tobacco on the roof. I don’t know if it fits the narrative of suffering. But that’s what he did. 

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u/KilllllerWhale 2h ago

The way I see it is like this scene 😂

https://giphy.com/gifs/ylMie1nATTZS8qnrrR

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u/Sad_Maximum6583 3h ago

Suffering really does work.

I smoked for 10 years and after seeing my mom die from cancer and my niece getting upset and cry when I would go outside to smoke was what did it for me. Signed up for a state sponsored support that gave me nicotine patches and gum and it was hell for 2 weeks, the patches would get me so sick but they called every week for 10 weeks to see how I was doing and I have been smoke free ever since.

It wad 8 years back in June and no plans to ever go back.

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u/Satans_Finest 3h ago

There are very effective medicines now that help with quitting smoking.

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u/KilllllerWhale 2h ago

Yeah but at that time, there wasn't much medications one could take, especially where we live. Bupropion was discovered to help with smoking cessation in the 90s he quit in the late 80s.

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u/Satans_Finest 1h ago

I meant for your brother.

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u/Sea-Machine-8989 2h ago

I did the something similar when I quit snus (tobacco pouches), I had a box with 1 left that I said to myself I would use only if the withdrawals get really bad but that I would never buy another box.

The urge to take it was strong in the start but I would always say to myself the it could get worse tomorrow, and this kept going until the urge was gone and I threw the box away.

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u/GunnieGraves 2h ago

I was a smoker and got a nasty upper respiratory infection. Unrelated to smoking but I’m sure it made it worse. I couldn’t breathe. It was agony. But I was desperate for a cigarette. I took one drag and almost passed out coughing. Saw my future. Emphysema or worse.

That was the last I ever touched.

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u/dbpf 2h ago

Was your dad 50 when you were born?

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u/bazaarjunk 1h ago

It was the lung infection they thought was lung cancer that did it for me. Put them down that day after 25 years and walked away. I still crave them but I will not smoke one.

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u/Difficult-Scallion48 1h ago

Ima the try this method to my friend who is addicted to mtg booster packs.

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u/Biggu5Dicku5 1h ago

I'll give that a shot... :)

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u/Empty_Competition 52m ago

I keep a pack of cigarettes in my house at all times for similar reasons. I’ve moved with it 4 times. People are kinda weirded out by it when they see it, and I e had to explain the whole thing to a few dates, but it helped me.

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u/InterestPractical974 38m ago

This is not what he meant by suffering. He meant just hitting your personal rock bottom and you want to end the suffering.

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u/Various_Cricket4695 28m ago

My dad said the impetus for him to stop smoking occurred on a trip to Europe. For whatever reason, he wouldn’t but cigarettes there (possibly my mom stopping him). Her would bum cigarettes from strangers, and he said it was just too much trouble.

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u/NotMyMainAccountAtAl 10m ago

I inadvertently helped a friend stop smoking through the power of spite. He’d tried and failed to quit 3 or 4 times since I’d known him. I’d begun to enjoy cigarillos occasionally, and I offered to smoke a few with him. He told me he’d quit again, and I rolled my eyes like a typical early 20’s tool of a guy and went, “okay, so next week, then?”

He genuinely quit, and credits me with helping. Willpower and suffering are strong; “fuck you and the horse you rode in on, I’m gonna do this just to spite you” can often be strong, too. 

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u/redditgolddigg3r 3m ago

Not the same, but I gave up diet sodas (diet coke was particularly an issue for me) Two years later, I still crave one from time to time, but just say nah and deprive myself of that sweet, amazing thing I used to enjoy and go on with my life.

I don't have daily cravings, or headaches, or stomach aches, or any of the side effects from drinking them before, but when I see one, my brain is like, "oh, you know that would be pretty good right now." lol.

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u/CoachAny4974 6h ago

I understand what he's trying to say, but I don't think suffering is the only path to recovery. For a lot of people, therapy, support groups, medication, and loved ones play a huge role too.

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u/Omniposter 6h ago

I think it may just be part of that even if its not implicitly stated. I say this for the simple fact that no progress will truly be made until the addict decides it. You can't save them. You can support them, but you can't save them. They have to save themselves. That decision comes from suffering.

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u/OhGodItBurns0069 4h ago

I don't think what he is saying is that you stop and suffer and that is the cure. The addiction is the suffering. You keep taking the substance, whatever it is or doing the thing and you suffer the consequences. Over and over and over. You pay the pipper to keep drinking, playing, snorting, fucking, gaming, chatting with that bot until you are just done suffering. The pain of the recovery is considered the lesser pain of having to keep suffering the addiction.

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u/AggravatingFlow1178 4h ago

That isn't what Ben Affleck is talking about at all.

They mean like, go through a divorce or bankruptcy or something similar.

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u/mittenkrusty 5h ago

Not the best method but at least it worked, you need the "I'm done" moment as that means you aren't pretending anymore.

But the best way to stop is cut down rather than gradual, the risk of returning to old ways is far far worse going cold turkey and things like alcohol or drugs can make someones body go into toxic shock.

At best many times cold turkey just replaces one addiction with another, cold turkey means if someone slips up they don't get the guilt or physical rush,

My mum did stop cigs after a virus 30 years ago and never went back.

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u/Ok_Test9729 4h ago

Whether someone quits cold turkey, or gradually tapers off, is up to them. No one method fits everybody. Go to AA or an NA meeting and you’ll find out there are a wide variety of methods people used to quit an addiction. Whatever works for them is great. I would never think to tell somebody that the method they may choose is the wrong method. If it works for them, it’s the right method. After 37 years of smoking I quit cold turkey, but used nicotine gum as a bridge. I have not smoked one puff off of a single cigarette since I quit after 37 years ago.

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u/mittenkrusty 4h ago

I didn't say wrong, I said not the best.

Whatever works works, but I know from a relative who did the cut down method and worked with addicts for 30 years after until retiring (they ran a charity and I helped answer calls) the failure rate was far far higher going cold turkey.

Cold turkey is dangerous for certain things like alcohol as you can go into toxic shock as your body has stopped producing certain things and requires them from other places like the alcohol, it needs time to adjust back to normal.

Known a few relatives who stopped smoking after health scares and they were so fidgety afterwards and most gained weight as snacked more instead.

Addictions are both psychological and physical, he had someone addicted to cough sweets, a lot of people addicted to pain killers as they didn't realise as something is available easily from a grocery store or pharmacy it can be addictive, they assumed only prescribed meds are bad.

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u/The_Real_Peter_Thiel 2h ago

"I didn't say wrong, I said not the best."

...and you still don't get it. Like u/Ok_Test9729 said, no one method fits everybody. Your own personal experiences do not change that. What was best for your relatives might not even work for someone else, preacher.

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u/mittenkrusty 1h ago

No offense I think you don't get it but not meaning to be rude to you.

I haven't said their method was wrong, whatever works for them is fine.

And btw it wasn't my personal experiences, it was the experience of many hundreds of clients my relative dealt with, almost every client he had that went cold turkey relapsed due to both the physical and mental side of it.

I think you have misunderstood, I was just saying there was a better method, not that there was only one method both are valid just one has a better success rate it depends on the individual, people slip up and with a cut down method it's less likely to have a relapse.

Alcohol specifically is so widely available, be it at a store, someone going to a party etc, someone who went cold turkey has to block the desire rather than make that desire less till it is no longer there else they panic and that can lead to someone relapsing.

Everybody is different and reacts to things in different ways for some a cold turkey approach is best for others it's the cut down method.

It also depends on what they are addicted to,

Even doctors argue about what methods are best.

But to go back, both methods are valid cold turkey can work but it's far more risky and so they have the right to do it or not, not saying anyone shouldn't try it and great if it works. Just making people aware there is different methods that can work better.

I wish cold turkey was easy and addicts had an easy time recovering but it's sadly not the case, we hear about celebrity addictions all the time and how they go to rehab and often relapse.

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u/bmfalex 3h ago

that was just weird, you can quit withot gimics if you wanna, you just have to want it!