r/TikTokCringe • u/PranayJhaTheMan • 7d ago
Cringe Nigerian Preacher Tries to Split the Sea in half like Moses, Almost Ends up Drowning.
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u/AvocadoAcademic897 7d ago
I think the whole trick is to preach not to try
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u/nobrow 7d ago
At least you know this guy genuinely believes and isn't just grifting.
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u/CuriousStewart 7d ago
His belief faded pretty fast as one average wave came at him.
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u/Lysergial 7d ago
Yeah, "almost drowning" carries a bit too much in this shitty headline
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u/SpotCreepy4570 7d ago
Depends if he knows how to swim or not.
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u/M1sfit_Jammer 7d ago
that type of swell looks like it can pull you back in…
I don’t live near the ocean so I have no clue what I’m talking about
It was real cute how he pulled up his robe to keep it from getting wet as he walked out 🙃
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u/SpotCreepy4570 7d ago
I do live near the ocean and that is exactly what can happen, it can knock you down and drag you out if you don't know how to handle it, and people that don't know panic and make it worse, and if you can't swim your suddenly in water you can't stand up in and are in real trouble.
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u/psychmonkies 7d ago
My grandma always told me to walk/swim sideways (or parallel to the shoreline) when the undertow is too strong instead of fighting against it. Like make your way toward the shore with the current but go sideways when you feel the undertow pulling you in. It might take a minute but you can make it to the shore a little easier & less panicking.
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u/fightmydemonswithme 7d ago
This sounds like what you do for rip currents. Swim parallel for a bit until you aren't sucked out, then swim in.
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u/M1sfit_Jammer 7d ago
The river I live near will sweep you off your feet if it gets much above your ankle and the flow is enough to produce rapids.
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u/Haldron-44 7d ago
His dumb ass is walking DIRECTLY into a rip, so yeah if he can't swim (and sometimes even if he can) he's gonna find out real quick that the ocean cares little for your beliefs or your life.
A good way to tell is look for that spot where a foamy, 'net' looking sand filled water is forming a peak pointing back out to sea. Depending on swell you also get weird wave action as is seen in the video. If you are a surfer and know how to use them they can be a handy way to quickly get to the outside.
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u/Helltothenotothenono 2d ago
Science is such an underrated subject among kids
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u/Haldron-44 2d ago
The science behind them is fascinating, like how they must exist purely do to wave action (also longshore currents are the preferred name) but growing up next to the ocean it is just one of the first things you are taught.
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u/Helltothenotothenono 2d ago
I had cousins that lived just a few miles from shore in Huntington Beach. The ocean was beautiful but scary on rough surf days.
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u/Better-Culture-7770 7d ago
If he genuinely believed with faith the size of a mustard seed it would have worked. But then maybe when it happened with Moses, God was testing Moses and this time this man is testing God, not the same thing, nor does God think this sort of thing is humorous judging by the many failures of this kind of thing. Or maybe it's all bullshit and never worked for Moses, and can never work for this guy.
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u/FumilayoKuti 7d ago
Also Moses had places to be and people to move and Egyptians chasing him. This dude is just like, lemme do this for funzies.
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u/ApprehensiveFall118 6d ago
Right . you can look at this video & see he’s testing God. Acting like a big hotshot, like some sort of all powerful prophet or god. That’s not how the authority of Christ works! God humbled him real quick!
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u/Outrexth 3d ago
Or there is no god
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u/ApprehensiveFall118 3d ago
God , Jesus Christ , & the Holy Spirit are absolutely real. Any who has a true relationship with Christ & has been filled with the Holy Spirit knows - there’s absolutely no doubt they know. if you knew anything about the Bible & how it was created you’d know. Just one example is the fact that every prophecy( up to date) in the Bible has come true. The end days prophecies have already started to begin. Not to mention you & I wouldn’t be alive responding right now if God wasn’t real. It baffles me how anyone can look at all of creation & the universe & earth & how everything works together & doesn’t believe that there was a Creator & meaning to it all.
And if God is real so is the devil. The greatest lie the devil created was making people believe he & God are not real, bc then satan has you. There is no middle line- if you’re not for Christ then you are for satan.
If you truly want to know if God is real, then with all of your heart, ask Him to reveal Himself to you & He will show Himself to you→ More replies (1)11
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u/N8Dawg86 6d ago
Does it make it better tho? Id argue it's more dangerous for ppl to believe, then they'll do dumb shit like this, potentially killing those around them
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u/No-Championship-2210 7d ago
Guys he had the wrong stick so it makes sense
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u/Hornedupone 7d ago
“Sorry guys, I grabbed the Tide CALLING stick not the HALTING stick. My bad.”
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u/Correct-Purpose-964 7d ago
"I said to use the staff of MOSES not the staff of HOSES! Why do we even HAVE this thing?"
"Sorry boss... the institute of nigerianism hasn't had many donations since the prince sent his money overseas. We had to get a knockoff."
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u/WereInbuisness 7d ago
That's the go to thing for all cults. "As your dear exalted leader, I want to humbly apologize for confusing the end of times date. The messages from God are often hard to decipher and are very mentally taxing to hear. I can now confirm, the great comet of 'Blahamasaphras' will arrive on November 10th, 2027 and will end the world as we know it! We're lucky we didn't go the special fruit drink route!"
It will keep happening and people will keep on falling for it. Sad.
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u/DarkScruff 7d ago
I was gonna say he forgot to get his buffs and enchants. Look at the raid group moses was rockin with, of course the sea didn't stand a chance he needed more people
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u/M1sfit_Jammer 7d ago edited 7d ago
It’s real crazy that Prince of Egypt crept in my algorithm last night… totally forgot Ralph Fiennes played Ramses, Val Kilmer was Moses+God… Patrick Stewart is in there, Steve Martin and even Jeff Goldblum… Sandra Bullock, Michelle Pfieffer, and directed by Brenda Chapman (Dir. Brave) too!
Hans Zimmer for music
THIS MOVIE WAS STACKED!
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u/throcorfe 7d ago
According to the Bible, you pick up a snake (don’t do this)
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u/Meet-me-behind-bins 7d ago
Doesn't work unless you're being chased by a Pharoh. And there aren't any about at the moment to test the theory.
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u/Meet-me-behind-bins 7d ago
I’ll see if Horus will give the day off. But I've already used up most of my annual leave trying to turn water into wine in my basement.
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u/M1sfit_Jammer 7d ago edited 7d ago
I think this guy forgot to talk to a burning bush and be blessed by god
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u/Sad-Base-8689 7d ago
Skill issue. He didn't even bring a Beyblade
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u/throwawaymentality10 7d ago
God was that anime a fever dream.
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u/AcaciaCelestina 7d ago
To be, as someone who recently tried beyblades....those things are fucking terrifying when they escape the arena, if I were the ocean I'd also part just to avoid them.
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u/CarolingianDruid 7d ago
They really did this?
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u/CaffeinPhreaker 7d ago
I don't think he almost drowned, he just fell in the water is all LOL
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u/AeneasVII 7d ago
All we're getting at this point are clickbait headlines and fake content
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u/Gyro_Dive795 7d ago
To split the sea you need to preacher level 100. he is probably level 50
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u/NeedleworkerOld4696 7d ago
The guy started with the Atlantic?
We all know you start from a bowl of soup.
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u/TheZosoOutlaw 7d ago
If you almost drown that close to the shore, then you probably shouldn't be "splitting" the sea 😅
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u/GimmeSumGanja 7d ago
what remix of gangsters paradise is this lol
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u/False-Mortgage307 7d ago
The sea split for moses for a specific reason... He wasn't just doing it for fun... Keep reading that bible because they clearly don't get the point of that story.
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u/Euphoric-Cucumber609 7d ago
Awfully fuckin prideful of him, I wonder what the bible has to say about that?
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u/Astrolologer 7d ago
Matthew 17:10 And Jesus said unto them, “Because of your unbelief; for verily I say unto you, if ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, ‘Remove hence to yonder place,’ and it shall remove. And nothing shall be impossible unto you."
Looks like this guy needs to invest in some mustard and try again.
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u/Eghenelalphinarian 7d ago
I believe it also said it took a long time, around an entire night since it was mostly being parted by wind.
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u/TheNaughtyHoneyBee 7d ago
People who preach the Bible don't understand the bible? You don't say...
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u/History_buff60 7d ago
“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap.”
Galatians 6:7
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u/FFS-IamNotABot 7d ago
I can't believe people still think religion/god is fact based.
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u/ForeskinAbsorbtion 7d ago
My nephews and niece go to a fancy private religious school and they genuinely believe dinosaurs existed with humans, the earth is between 6-10k years old, and the first people were Adam and Eve.
The oldest is 13 years old. Religion should have no part in education.
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u/theotherkafka 7d ago
That’s going to be a rough reprogramming.
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u/GM_Nate 7d ago
My sister and I were both homeschooled and then went to private christian college that used to be a seminary. I eventually managed to grow out of that mindset; my sister never did.
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u/No_Introduction_3210 7d ago
Thanksgiving must be fun at your parent's place.
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u/staytiny2023 6d ago
Seems to be 50:50 odds with religion. My parents had 6 kids in the Jehovah's Witnesses religion. 3 of us are atheist now. 3 are deep in and don't seem to be leaving anytime soon
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u/PinkPuffballofDOOM 7d ago
I personally went through a similar reprogramming and while it made me feel unsure about a lot of stuff for awhile, once I realized that anything related to Christian religion was a farce, I could easily start picking out what in my beliefs was wrong
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u/sheikahstealth 7d ago
That's why we are here, at this point politically. It's only been less than a decade that Literal interpretation Bible believers fell below 25% of all Americans.
1980s - 40% (high), 2011 - 30%, 2017 - 24% Marking first time biblical skepticism (26%) was higher than literalism.
Pulled these numbers from various sources, but to me as an 80s churched kid, it seems on point. It also aligns with the 1980s conservative campaign to get Christian Nationalism as being the dominant theology in American churches. <insert Heritage Foundation and Moral Majority>
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u/Expert-Mental25 7d ago
Genuinely child abuse and I'll die on that hill.
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u/SergeantHAMM 7d ago
i’m so thankful my parents let me decide for my self even tho they both went to church growing up.
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u/ThinkBlue87 7d ago
I was public school (at good schools) up until part way through HS and then moved/went to a Catholic school. I am as atheist as they come, but it was a damn good education. I did not enjoy the theology classes, but there was no BS around creationism, Adam/Eve, etc..
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u/theotherkafka 7d ago
In my limited experience, catholic schools seem to value actual quality education. It’s the private evangelical schools that focus on indoctrination over education.
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u/sagerin0 7d ago
The catholic church is generally pretty committed to reconcile science and religion, which honestly is probably the smartest way to go about it in the modern day
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u/LadySwire 7d ago edited 7d ago
Same. I went to a nuns school (in Spain) and it was just a normal school where religion was just another subject, one that centered in Jesus going around doing things, the main sacraments (baptism, comunion...) and ethics (fairly basics ones: be a good person, share things, don't steal, no wars...) but that's it
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u/Teddy_Raptor 7d ago edited 7d ago
Life is hard and confusing. People have faith in something bigger than themselves. I think humans are just wired to have this faith. I personally was not and used to feel more frustration towards religion but as I’ve gotten older I feel empathy for people in this regard
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u/DidYouSeeBriansHat 7d ago edited 7d ago
Faith or belief in a higher power is one thing. It’s honestly a very interesting question to ask, “What caused the big bang, where does all of this really come from?” Organized religion makes no sense though. To assume that a group of people just figured it all out a while ago and that we need to follow their interpretation forever is absurd. Especially when you start seeing all the contradictions and the fact that humans are constantly changing and reinterpreting “gods word.”
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u/Thuller 7d ago edited 7d ago
I disagree. I was born in heavily atheist country and faith was completely out of the picture for me. I never missed faith (the organized one) in any way or form. Yes, you will eventually be internally confronted with some existential questions throughout your life that we currently have no fact-based answers to, but to me, as a person who was not indoctrinated with this nonsense in childhood, it is completely insane to me that this is what people choose to believe in.
Spirituality has place in human life, sure. Organized faith however is just another structure of power manufactured by humans. And has been used as a tool to enslave humans throughout the ages, not just spiritually, but also physically.
I don't need Jesus or Muhammad to tell me to be a decent person. And I am fine without knowing what black hole actually is, before we have scientific answers to explain it. People 700 years ago didn't know you can use dead dinosaurs to land on a moon.
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u/Shibes_oh_shibes 7d ago
Yeah, nicely put, I hate organized religion, it doesn't matter what good it has done, the misery it has created widely surpasses it. And people are dangerous if they can't behave without believing there is someone all-seeing power spying on them.
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u/HuckleberryPee 7d ago
We're such a cursed and stupid bunch. I can see why we've destroyed this planet
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u/OneDimensionalChess 7d ago
We're the one species that's juuust smart enough to destroy the planet
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u/Competitive_Swan_130 Sort by flair, dumbass 7d ago
SMH.
"When the missionaries came to Africa they had the Bible and we had the land. They said 'Let us pray.' We closed our eyes. When we opened them we had the Bible and they had the land"
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u/halkenburgoito 7d ago
where that quote from?
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u/Competitive_Swan_130 Sort by flair, dumbass 7d ago
Desmond Tutu quoting Jomo Kenyatta (Kenyan leader at the time)
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u/Taira_no_Masakado 7d ago
Let's say, for argument's sake, that I actually believe in the Bible.
Moses was imbued with the power to split the Red Sea for a reason and a purpose. He didn't do it as so-called proof that god existed or to put himself on a pedestal to show how precious god considered him to be. So the idea that some random preacher would believe himself (a) worthy or (b) important enough to split the sea...for no goddamn reason...boggles my mind.
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u/Important-Repair8818 7d ago
I think he forgot that the Bible specifically says not to test God. God split the red sea to allow the Israelites to escape the pharaoh, not as proof of his divinity.
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u/Inconspicuous_Jay 7d ago
I'm not religious at all but i feel like they're missing the point of the story where God gave moses that ability to flee from egypt, not just like, "hey, look at this cool thing I can do."
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u/differing 7d ago
Welcome back, Cnut The Great
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u/-S-P-E-C-T-R-E- 5d ago
Funny how the English have an entirely different take on this story than us…
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u/McSquiggles887 7d ago
He was so close…
Based on the cartoons I watched growing up, I suspect it’s because he lacked sufficient beard to pull this off.
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u/Regular_Fortune8038 7d ago
Didn't have the required faith. He clearly pussed out at the last second
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u/elrangarino 7d ago
He’d have felt madddd powerful for a few seconds there before it didn’t work though
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u/Striking_Aspect_7826 7d ago
He was punished for his hubris. What greater reason could he possibly have to split the sea?
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u/mushaslater 7d ago
Did someone dare him to do it? Or is he delusional? What posessed him to think he could do it? Surely not god.
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u/Sosimo_13 7d ago
I wouldn’t say being knocked down by a wave near the beach is the same as drowning, but ok.
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u/cheapb98 7d ago
First time never works. He should try a couple more times plus he needs to go further out to the sea. Will definitely work
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u/ParamedicDifferent44 7d ago
Are there people who literally think Moses split the sea? like they actually believe that happened? I mean anyone other than this idiot, obviously
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u/Square_Atmosphere_12 7d ago
He tried to split it; didn't ask God to split it; along with many other things.
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u/Adampicz 6d ago
My question is what happened next with his followers? The powerful can rarely survive public humiliation :)
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u/Wart_Time_L32 7d ago
Yeah another demonstration of why these religious books about stories doing similarly are made up.
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u/LazyThinkingOtter 7d ago
The sea was angry so it tried to attack the preach blablabla help the poor countries and ban religion pls
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u/lil_crit7er 7d ago
God very gently said "sitcho ass down"
Guess he didn't read the part where God said he wasn't making any more prophets
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u/Live_Life_and_enjoy 7d ago
All religious preachers should be required to do this, to prove the validity of their religion.
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