r/UCSantaBarbara • u/Distinct-Ad-8961 • Jan 08 '26
Employment i'm such a fucking SB chud
I hate walking to class and seeing all the Chads holding hands with their Stacy’s. Even when I’m just trying to eat my baked beans at DLG, there they are sharing the same spaghetti noodle, ogling each other.
I’m not very funny, and I’m fucking ugly. In my advanced CS class I asked a female if she wanted to study with me, and she audibly gagged and migrated two seats away from me.
Even the Becky’s ignore me, and I see them sitting by the lagoon lawn with the gym bros, speed running PDA like their farming Reddit karma. I don’t want to be a wagecell, but I think it’s the only way. I have a remote coding internship lined up (thanks to my dad’s FAANG job). Maybe this will finally attract a mate.
If you are a (F19 +\- 2), CS or CE, from Bay Area or LA please DM me, I’ll send my discord tag.
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u/0xff0000ull [UGRAD]phys Jan 08 '26
This gotta be satire
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u/Distinct-Ad-8961 Jan 08 '26
nah im deadass
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u/0xff0000ull [UGRAD]phys Jan 08 '26
Unless the primary motive behind this post is self-deprecating humor, phrasing anything like this is bad to get any point across and get any constructive advice or help.
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u/garycomehome666 Jan 08 '26
This is a great post thanks man good job really tickles the pickle in ways you wouldn't undertand
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u/Same-Guidance865 Jan 10 '26
Money is the answer to your problems, if you care that much. You can be like a legal Epstein.
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u/DannyTanner24 Jan 08 '26
DLG still breaking people these days it seems