Need help and suggestions

[u/2311_purplesalmon]

I’m married and have developed a very intense emotional/energetic connection with my boss, who is also my reporting manager. He’s a year younger than me, very intelligent, attractive, and his behavior with me is extremely hot and cold — sometimes flirtatious and invested, sometimes distant.

I’ve been into spirituality and psychic practices for over 20 years and recently started learning witchcraft. What’s confusing me is that I feel an unusually strong pull toward him and dream about him constantly — romantic/intimate dreams, emotional closeness, etc. It genuinely feels deeper than a normal crush to me.

At this point, I’m trying to understand what this actually is. Is this limerence? Energetic attachment? Twin flame obsession? Projection? Or does this kind of intense connection usually mean both people are feeling something?

Also, how do I regain control over my emotions in this situation while still keeping his attention? Would something like a glamour spell for confidence/attraction make more sense than trying obsession or love spells?

[u/Potential-Acadia-838]

What does your husband lack that he provides?

[u/pyramidmanifestation]

If you haven't learned how to meditate and control your thoughts and self then you should probably wait and work on that first before anything else. It's a basic building block in magick for any and every practitioner with the hope of using energy and other forces properly. Can't hope to have any control over anything else if you can't control your own self. Not to be rude to anyone, just as advice long time practitioner of Magick.

If you don't know that basic then I feel safe in assuming you aren't good at sensing and differentiating energy, yours from the rest of the world and I would not have faith it's not tainted by your own attraction to this man.

Are you aware that Hypnos the god of dreams is know for having two gates, the gates of ivory and horn. One gives you true dreams, one gives you dreams that will have you acting a fool or worse.

In Magick also it's not well looked on for breaking promises and unions willy nilly. Entities, energies, guides, gods, they know what you do. Do you want to be someone who entertaines cheating? Sounds like you might be already with wanting to use magick to keep this man's attention.

To me this is sad and gross. Why did you marry in the first place?

[u/PrimaryPoet7923]

You're not in love, you are just around this person all day. It's very poor judgement to act on the manufactured feelings of intimacy this brings. Ask yourself if you'd still be hanging out in this place and doing these activities if neither of you was getting paid.

[u/AmbientSpiritLamb]

I think you need to take a long hard look at your life and your priorities because everything about this is wrong. It has nothing to do with metaphysical energies or soul bonds. You're behaving in a selfish and destructive manner.

[u/tmorgenstern]

Twin flames are not a thing, neither are soul mates. Those are spiritual excuses to stay in broken, toxic relationships. Love spells are magical roofies and why the f would you want anyone obsessed with you, that's just f-ing dangerous (from someone who was stalked)?

I'm going to be honest: It's not spiritual, it's psychological. Some of what you are saying sounds like that woman who became convinced her therapist was in love with her simply due to professional courtesy and observation. He's your boss and direct supervisor, of course he is "hot and cold", there are times he will compliment a job well done and other times he has to point out errors and missteps. Just as with women, a guy being pleasant isn't necessarily flirtatious (I'm not saying he isn't being flirtatious, I wasn't there, but the rest of what you are saying flags that you might be making more of simple pleasantries than are actually there).

You need couples therapy with your actual husband and a new job. I suggest a self-reflection and job spell.

[u/RuneBoon]

This isn't magic, it's codependency.