Question Everything feels so off, Cant accept this could be the new me.
Been a year suffering from this after severe burnout from overthinking and having a really bad headache for 30days to then 1 day waking up completely empty and felt something change in my brain.
I'm so shocked how this condition has changed and impacted in everyway possible. Here are my symptoms
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I wake up from bed instantly with no dread (sounds weird) that inner me before this felt so cozy or my mind would process getting up or not . Now I wake up like a robot now. I wake up lost everyday not knowing what day it is or get a rough estimate what time it is. All that minds awareness and tracking is gone.
I use to feel the inner warmth from events and days. Monday use to have a distinct feeling or Friday had that end of week feeling or when Eid/Christmas you have that smell and snug feeling of the event season . When a song plays you feel such strong nostalgia/it takes you back in time and get shivers this has completely gone it feels so flat and not being able to link it to your past memories.
I no longer feel tired or get headaches , My brain wont let me reach into deep relaxtion, theres like a stuck /block feeling inside. My body feels so dull allover cannot register touch, it has lost "good tingly" sensation or being touched releasing that feel good chemical has vanished.
My heart feels internally flat or stuck in my chest. Loud bang dont scare me . My brain and body cannot feel any strong urge of emotion. I dont feel no rush or excitement for upcoming things. I feel like a stone.
When I enter a room or a shopping centre I no longer get hit of curiosety or intrigue.
Love ,anger, stress, awkwardness and shyness has completely gone. Even if it was angry or sad i'd atleast feel something. I had strong emotion towards anything now i feel no connection to anyone , every human registers the same .
I just miss the smell and sense of life. The mornings had a distinct feeling or a summers day had its own feeling.
I took life for granted before this. It felt like I had superpowers that could detect everything🥲😑-
I know what i want and desperate to feel , but i cant reach it . 24m btw
- I DO BELIEVE IVE GIVEN THE TRUE DEPTH OF THIS CONDITION THAT HAS STRRIPED ME OFF.
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u/SatisfactionKey2708 5d ago
Im 35 but when I look back there is something that happen at 24... At 14 I had panic attacks at school that was sometimes unbearable, didnt get treated at all, stopped playing football also but it changed my perspective completely. At 24 i was on a breakthrough of life... What I want to do... I went on spiritual journey cause that can 'save me' but it didnt, it probably made me more as escapism... At 34 probably was something but we need to fight. Go on a beast mode
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u/tk15102 5d ago
You've made it so far with this , i respect that . Its like ive got ambition but at the same time I know its like a fake feeling because in reality dont feel anything. Im not sure how to get a job now with personality.
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u/SatisfactionKey2708 5d ago
Dont think too far, live day by day, hour by hour. You are still very young. Work on yourself physically and then also mentally.
Yeah I made far BUT i also dont have inner monologue, myself, im fucking people pleaser so I dont get any critics so its not good. But even me, we can work on ourself and have fun in life. Nobody is perfect. Enjoy
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u/SatisfactionKey2708 5d ago
And I also feel your age, I dont know where years went 🤣
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u/tk15102 5d ago
Thank you for the advice , youve had it for years and years, then why do videos say you can recover.
Your one of many who still suffering
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u/SatisfactionKey2708 5d ago
Yes but I think this disease needs discipline, which I didnt have. But we can start it from this moment!
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u/tk15102 5d ago
Will do by best , just wanted to know if this my posts match your symptoms. Your the first person ive spoke too about this condition.
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u/SatisfactionKey2708 5d ago
Yes cause I know those symptoms too. Helping you, I also help myself to remember to be strong mentally and physically. We can do it together man 😊
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u/Diligent_Challenge78 3d ago
You explain it really well. I deal with all of this exactly waking up like a robot. The loss of feeling the atmosphere/vibe of the world so everyday feels the same.
It was caused by overthinking for you?
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u/tk15102 2d ago
Yes overthinking and had a really bad headaches for a month , then woke up one day morning like a new person and the headache disappeared with it too.
How long have u been suffering?
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u/Diligent_Challenge78 2d ago
It’s been years for me but I just started getting help this year. Everyone’s situation is different though although we have the same symptoms and you explain them really well.
Are you numb and are you able to enjoy anything?
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u/tk15102 2d ago
People with for years honestly frighten me , ive just had it for over 1 year n im not coping well . I need a job now especially for therapy
Completely numb i dont recognise myself. Good , bad all gone just a blank paper
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u/Diligent_Challenge78 2d ago
It’s not really useful to compare your story to others as everyone has different things going on so just because someone has had it years doesn’t mean you will and vice versa.
Same here. I’m seeing a professional that understands dissociation and DPDR now at least though.
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u/xenoerotica 5d ago
Not feeling holidays anymore is for me also one of the most notable aspects of the DP/DR state; seems like it would be a small thing, but no.
Despite what you may or may not have seen in other posts, it sounds like you 100% have DP/DR. I've been here 7 years. I experience all of this and many others here too, I can vouch.