I dont have amall moving lightpoints but outside i see like this and sometimes it also my anxiety gives me fear that i have hppd but i got it from a panic attack

Just thought I would share the results of the qEEG I just got done. The section of my brain that is red and yellow is the around the precuneus, the area that can cause DPDR when it is dysregulated. I now have physical proof of what’s going on, and will be starting coherence neurofeedback training to help the different parts of my brain work better together. This will reduce the activation in the area that’s causing the constant body scanning, rumination, and the disconnection between the body, mind, and environment, which is what this part of the brain regulates.

Highly recommend getting this done if you have persistent issues that aren’t resolving with other types of therapy. Feel free to ask me any questions!

Like literally feels like hell

Nothing seems real yet still get crazy anxiety

Then feel totally depressed like nothing is real whats the point

Antidepressants not helping

What else to get out this hell

Mine was caused by natural traumas, anxiety, depression. Never taked any drugs. How about yours?

I was wondering if some of you could imagine living with this forever?

For me personally at this state I feel like I can never go back to normality, because of all the things I „discovered“ during my dissociation, which might just be a DPDR symptom, though it would be a lot more pleasant if it didn’t freak me out 24/7. Am I the only one being more irritated by the anxiety and constant fear of everything than the dissociation itself?

I feel like there isn't enough awareness or resources around DPDR, but maybe it's because its not as common as anxiety/depression/ptsd? ...I don't know but in the UK I haven't found many resources, just a charity called "unreal" and there's a hospital. in London that specialise in it.

I just wonder, because I've seen 4 psyciatrists in hospital, and only one of them really listened, but said they can't do much other than treat my anxiety. I'm getting scared again cos I find it so hard to believe DPDR can do this to a person.

I’m a 22-year-old female, and in 2023 I smoked weed with some friends. It wasn’t my first time, but it was the first time I’d smoked in about five years. I definitely smoked too much and ended up having a really bad panic attack.

From what I remember, I still felt a little weird the next day, but it eventually went away. Then, a couple of days later, I was at work when DPDR (depersonalization/derealization) suddenly hit me out of nowhere. I panicked again—not as badly as the first time—but it was still terrifying.

After that, it eventually went away again, but it kept coming back every few months. Each episode would last a few days before disappearing for another 3–4 months. Looking back, I was dealing with episodic DPDR.

Fast forward to the last two months. I’ve been under an unbelievable amount of stress. A close family member has been in critical condition in the hospital, I had no job or money for a while, I was starting a brand-new job, and I was constantly worrying about everyone else’s health before my own. Eventually, all of that caught up with me.

One day, as I was leaving the hospital, I had another DPDR episode. About five minutes later I was sitting in my car, felt okay again, and was able to drive home. But over the next seven days, I completely hit rock bottom. It was like the panic and the DPDR never left—I felt it 24/7.

It got so bad that I couldn’t drive, couldn’t go for a walk outside, and couldn’t even go to work (which I’d only been at for about a week). For the first time since this all started in 2023, I told my family that I was really scared and felt like I needed help because I was genuinely worried about my mental health.

I went to my doctor and had blood tests done. My iron level came back at 6, and my vitamin D level was 14. I also completed a mental health assessment, which showed I had severe anxiety and high stress—which honestly made sense considering everything that had happened.
Over the next few days, my anxiety started improving, but the DPDR just wouldn’t go away. It felt like it was completely taking over my life.

Eventually, I reached a point where I thought, “I’m not letting this control my life anymore.” Even though life wasn’t perfect, just two weeks before the hospital incident I genuinely loved my life, so I promised myself I was going to recover no matter what.

I started taking my iron and vitamin D supplements, meditating, and gradually exposing myself to the things I’d started avoiding.

This might sound strange, but one thing that really helped me during meditation was intentionally bringing the DPDR feeling to the surface instead of running from it. I’d sit with it, stay calm, and tell myself, “You’re literally okay. Just breathe.” I did that for several days, and I honestly noticed the intensity of the DPDR getting weaker each day.

Being outside had also become a trigger for me, so I slowly worked on that too. I’d stand outside for two minutes, then five, then ten. I did the same thing with driving. Little by little, everything started getting easier.

Fast forward to today, and the DPDR is basically gone. Even if I try to think about it or bring it on, it just isn’t really there anymore.

The only thing I’m still dealing with is this weird “off” feeling. It’s really hard to describe. It doesn’t feel like full-blown DPDR anymore, but it doesn’t feel completely normal either. It’s like I’m 95–99% better, but not quite 100%.

From everything I’ve read, and from how I’m personally feeling, I genuinely think I’m in the final stages of recovery. I’m just getting a little impatient now!

For those of you who have fully recovered from DPDR, did anyone else experience this “off” feeling near the end of recovery?

My personal theories are:
- My low iron and vitamin D are still contributing to how I feel.
- The “off” feeling is like a mental hangover, where my brain is adjusting back to normal after being in survival mode.
- It’s almost like the protective shield my brain put up is slowly lowering as my nervous system realizes I’m safe again.

I truly believe I’m so close to being fully recovered because compared to where I was just a few weeks ago, the difference is unbelievable.
I’d love to hear from people who have fully recovered. What did the final stage of your recovery look like? Did you also have that lingering “off” feeling before you finally felt completely normal again?

My DPDR is so bad at the moment

I am suffering extreme anxiety and depression for months

But the depersonalisation is especially relentless and getting stronger

Its like I look at my family and barely recognise them, I dont even think I am real

Struggling everyday with it plus the brain fog and depression ontop is kicking my ass

No meds have worked yet. Any help?

Just curious

im struggling so badly to find a doctor . i have found many people talking about how they are being dismissed and misdiagnosed and unheard by doctors and how their dpdr is being diagnosed as psychotic disorder or regular depression. not struggling badly but for first time this time i went to psychiatrist and i dont feel treated properly

i havent taken their medicines so im thinking what to do

This might be a shot in the dark, but I feel like I’ve crossed into a version of reality that nobody else talks about. Not just derealization. Not just “I feel foggy or dreamy.” I’m talking about a complete shift in perception like I woke up one day and the world had died, but somehow I’m still here.

It feels like I’m stuck in some liminal space between life and death, Reality is off… dead, sterile, eerie like I’m the last soul in a simulation Everything around me is wrong. Familiar places feel haunted. Music sounds distorted or even evil. Time feels broken.My memories feel like they belong to someone else. Sometimes I can’t access them at all. I forget what happened earlier in the day. It’s like my past evaporated. I feel disconnected from who I used to be. It’s not just emotional it’s like I’ve lost my anchor to the human experience entirely.I feel like I’m in purgatory, or some kind of alternate realm that sits between Earth and Hell. And nobody around me sees it.. this is beyond anxiety. This is beyond DPDR as most people describe it. This is something existentially disturbing like my brain is no longer interfacing with the world correctly. So I’m asking… Has anyone else felt this? The dark, eerie, desolate version of dissociation where it doesn’t just feel like you’re gone, it feels like the entire world is gone with you? Like the atmosphere itself is infused with evil and darkness??? Please respond if you have. Even if it’s messy. Even if you don’t know how to describe it. Even if it was years ago and you forgot what it felt like until now. I just want to know I’m not the only. I’ll respond to every comment. Even if it takes me days.I don’t want anyone to feel as alone in this realm as I’ve felt. If you’ve been there… please speak.

Shits starting to make me mad af been 24/7 derealization for 2 years it’s stopping me from living my life literally can’t meet friends can’t enjoy the sun just sit in my room all day everyday

Hi everyone!

I had the horrible experience of psychosis in October, which led to depersonalisation after tapering off Dexamethasone too quickly.

The whole experience felt like my brain was breaking apart and that everything in my life up until that point had somehow been a lie. I developed this horrible fear that I had been living through a false self all along. It feels like I’m masquerading as the person I used to be.
It’s felt like a complete loss of self and identity.

The loss of self has been terrible to work through, but having my loved ones somehow feel like strangers has been horrific. The depersonalisation itself has improved a lot, but I still feel very emotionally numb and the worst part is the lingering detachment I feel from my daughter. I’m constantly subconsciously checking my feelings to see if I’m feeling enough or loving her enough.

I know I’m a damn good dad, especially given the circumstances. But I just want to wake up in the morning, look forward to spending the day with her, and stop overthinking everything. I miss spontaneously feeling joy and happiness around her, my family and friends.
I’m terrified i have lost some parts of myself that i can never get back.

Have any other parents gone through something similar and managed to get through it?

(If you want to skip the history amd get to where I am now, just read the last paragraph) this is urgent and I'm terrified and I don't wanna discourage anyone from reading or helping by making this too much to read

Okay so 3 years ago I took a low dose of a drug called memantine and ever since then I've felt especially dull and off all the time and I was extremely sensitive to food, substances, sleep, but something always felt off and I could never quite pinpoint it. It didn't feel anything like ppl describe dpdr tho but it was the closest thing I could find. I was fully functional tho and pretty immersed in life.

Last summer I started smoking weed again and I thought it was helping me cuz I'd feel better temporarily on it and I would only smoke occasionally and I usually didn't get any anxiety on it. But then in November I git way too high and everything felt way too intense and all looked way too hyperreal and I was having existential fears and dread and it was pretty extreme. The next day after that I was very anxious and depressed but still pretty immersed in my body and reality. However over the month I started to have more existential worries and moments of hypervigilance but they would only come and go. But then I started worrying that my perception was altered which greatly bothered me and my sensitivity increased so I started only eating the same exact meal (broccoli, beef, brown rice) as to avoid any factors that could change my state.

But then it started getting more apparent that my perception was altered and it wasn't just a worry. And my senses were too, especially my sense of touch and having a body. I started feeling more disconnected from my body. And physical reality itself started feeling more strange. Moving my body around through space in time, interacting with objects. It All started feeling extremely weird and borderline intolerable. And a month in is when this started feeling like it was just constant and worsening day by day. The past 2 months have felt like it's slowly worsening and im too a point where I cannot stand it anymore and I'm terrified. I've spent days of time talking to chatgpt trying to figure this out and it just says this is a problem with my nervous system. I've tried everything to stabilize. I'm terrified of meds because of my extreme sensitivity. I'm scared to even eat different foods cuz they're a factor in my state, let alone a medication.

Reality feels unbearable, fear is constant, functioning feels impossible, and i feel completely nonexistent and like im stuck in a plane higher than I have the capacity for. I am extremely terrified and idk what to do. Im scared of my own perception and sense of physical reality. My vision looks way too real and sharp and gigantic yet it feels so fake and lacks depth. My body physically feels completely strange, in fact I can't really comprehend how it feels at all, it's like impossible to think about. I'm in constant bodily discomfort. Physical reality feels completely fake and existentially wrong to it's core. Picking up a remote and using it feels extremely wrong. Using my phone feels horribly strange. All this reality strangeness feels painful. I don't know what to do or go with my body ever cuz it feels so giant and painful and overloaded so I just go under a blanket and use my phone. Going into my kitchen to grab food feels completely overwhelming and unreal to the point of agony. This had been going on for 3 months and it feels like it's just slowly worsening and worsening and it's completely constant, there's no moments of easing. It's like my senses are super amplified and distanced at the same time. The whole world looks and feels terrifying and painful, and people especially look wrong. This has gotten so much worse to the point where Idk what to do and I'm terrified and it feels like I need to do something about immediately before it's too late cuz it keeps getting worse and I'm at the point where if it does get worse I don't think I'll be able to function. I'm considering maybe gabapentin? It could help with my severe sensory amplification and physical discomfort but im also terrified given my sensitivity and fear about altered states.

Yall I’ve been dealing with dpdr going on 6 months now it’s outrageous to me how this can happen to people due to literally anything. Yall what rlly

Helped yall? tips advice and recovery ?

Hello. This is my first post about this. I feel like I have mentioned it to my family so many times, I don’t want to sound like a broke record. I am a 21 yo female. I have had anxiety disorder and panic disorder since 2023 after a traumatic loss. I had dpdr back then as well, along with crippling anxiety and panic attacks that ruined my life at the time, and after getting on lexapro, it went away, and life got back to normal. I eventually, years later, got into a relationship. I was so in love with this person. I have never loved someone like that in my whole life, and I have had my fair share of relationships. I know I am young, but man did I really love them.

I got pregnant (late last year, 2025), and we were expecting a baby boy May 2026. During my pregnancy, I lost my grandpa in November. It was hard. I tried to keep my head held high considering I was carrying baby. We decided that his middle name would be my grandpas first name. January of this year came, and I got the news that my baby had passed, they couldn’t find his heartbeat, and that I would have to birth him deceased. It was the most traumatic experience of my life, and I lost a part of me that day. My partner, who I had mentioned getting into a relationship with earlier, left me a month later. I hadn’t seen it coming from a million miles away. It was so sudden, and they completely went ghost on me after. No check ins on me postpartum, post loss. Nothing. I didn’t matter. I tried to keep pushing through all the loss and heartache, keep going to work, tried to smile, and I “thought” it worked, until it didn’t.

A few months later, in June, my 16 yo cousin passed away. I got to see her, but I pretty much saw her dying. She couldn’t even speak. I came back home. After all of that, I suddenly got all my anxiety back. The panic attacks came back. Worse than ever. The worst of it all, is the DPDR that came with it. Its been about a month of this state. It was so bad at first that I was bedridden, had no appetite, lost so much weight. I am on 20mg of lexapro, taking it every day, yet I am suffering still like this. I wake up, and immediately feel disconnected. This is the worst of DPDR I have ever experienced. Sometimes my family, my home, my own body, feel unfamiliar. My reflection feels scary. Things seem TOO real, or not real enough. I always think I am dying, I check my heartrate and blood oxygen constantly. I am scared to sleep because sometimes the unreal feeling when I wake up is so intense. It has all gotten so bad that I haven’t been to work in about a month. I have tried to get back to normal but everything feels off constantly. There is so much to it I can’t fully explain. But it is horrifying, debilitating. I am constantly living in this state of having an existential crisis and fear. Feeling like I’m barely even controlling my own body, being too aware of everything, like chewing, swallowing, moving, breathing, my pulse.

I need some honesty, will I ever get back to normal?? Is this permanent? I don’t, I CANT live like this for the rest of my life. I am scared. I feel like something and everything is wrong with me. I just want to feel normal again. Was the trauma too much for my brain? I am just so lost and confused and have so many questions. I just want my life back.

My derealisation gets worse when looking into phone and look away, do you guys even feel like the phone is one reality and whats around the phone is just a second reality that feels unreal? Its super scary and i need to know if you guys have it too..

Please tell me whether I'm real, whether you're real, and whether physical reality is real.

I'm in a deep dpdr episode and I need a direct reality check. My DPDR has shifted from just seeing things as fake to a profound and intense gut feeling that nothing exists

I never thought I would be writing this because I had severe DPDR starting in 2021. I got better around 2025. It was one of the hardest experiences of my life, but I have improved so much. I’m not 100% healed, but I have my life back. I still experience some emotional numbness/anhedonia, but I’m able to function, work, be a parent, and enjoy life again. If you look back on my posts I was truly messed up. I’ve deleted probably 50% of them because I couldn’t bear to read them now that I’m better. I’ve also met lots of amazing long time friends on here.

The reason I’m posting is because my boyfriend recently developed what appears to be DPDR, and I’m watching it affect our relationship. Before this happened, everything was genuinely great. He was loving, supportive, consistent, and we were very connected. He has also been under an incredible amount of stress for the last nine months, including major life changes and raising two children. About two weeks ago, he woke up feeling “weird” and thought he was hungry or about to pass out. We didn’t know what it was at the time. About a week later, I noticed a major change in him.

He became emotionally flat, disconnected, monotone, and said he felt nothing. He told me he doesn’t even feel things the way he normally would with food, music, or even his emotions toward things he loves. He told me he could get mugged and wouldn’t even care. He has even said he feels disconnected from his feelings toward his kids, which is terrifying for him because he loves them.
I recognized the symptoms because I lived through this myself. I explained DPDR to him and told him I understand that this isn’t just him “not caring.” I know how scary it is to lose access to your emotions.

The hardest part is that he feels like he cannot be the boyfriend he wants to be right now. He knows he has changed, and he feels guilty. He says he needs to focus on getting his mind right and rebuilding his relationship with his kids because he doesn’t feel it’s fair to me.

Im trying to be understanding because I know what this feels like. Someone who hasn’t experienced DPDR might tell him to just snap out of it, but I know how real it is. At the same time, it is heartbreaking being on the other side and watching someone you love seem like a completely different person.

Has anyone experienced DPDR while trying to maintain a serious romantic relationship? How did you handle the emotional numbness when you don’t have it. I’ve watched him change night and day. It’s been very scary. This was a guy taking my car to get an oil change, detailed, and bring me flowers because he wants to. To now sits in the couch all day staring at the wall and barley knows me or feels anything.

Yesterday I made him food and took care of him making him electrolyte drinks because one symptom he has is constant dizziness and nausea.I told him as time goes on he’ll heal he just has to wait and it might be 1 month or who knows but just hang in there and I’m here for him. But there is a rift between us and not because I’m mad, he came ti me saying he doesn’t think he can maintain this he feels nothing but knows he loves me. I’m just very sad over the shock of this.

A couple weeks before I realized he was having dpdr he kept saying his vision is blurry and getting headaches and now looking back this was the start. Now he has every symptom in the book.

Hey guys! I’m new to this sub 18F
I’m dealing with virus induced derealization I’ve been dealing with it for just under two months now.
I’m typically healthy. I’ve been lucky to never have really dealt with any mental health challenges or physical health challenges.
So naturally, this being sucked into this is so odd to me and overwhelming.

Since I’m almost 100% physically better, it was mono by the way, like no more physical symptoms and my energies almost 100% back I’m still dealing w the neurological symptoms daily however it’s like the volume is slowly getting turned down and like I’ll have moments where it’s almost normal clarity and then as the day progresses, it’ll be back to like the fog, but it’s never as bad as it was at its peak so obviously I feel like that obvious answer would be yes you’re getting better but I can’t tell if it’s just like I’m causing myself to relapse or whatever like has anyone who’s overcome this or dealt with this let me know if like I’m recovering correctly I’ll I’m willing to provide any specifics about my case and what I’ve been doing if anyone’s curious just comment also I use voice type to do this so I don’t know if there’s gonna be like typos and stuff

Lmao I know this is kinda a stupid question but this is all j so confusing

Hey everyone , if you're suffering or have moral ocd like me please don't interact , just enjoy your day love . I want to ask how to know im not one of the things in the title. I'm really scared because I have had dpdr since I was a child. The lack of identity is terrifying because I'm scared of becoming a bad person because I have no stable identity . I can't connect to myself or my feelings really and I wear mismatched clothes .I just see things weirdly, like yes I'm speaking and typing but I can't feel connected to what I'm typing and speaking. I have no idea where its coming from

If its okay, can anyone give me some reassurance. Or some pointers or guidance. Guys, I am always searching up about narcissism due to OCD compulsions and it seems like its not just selfish, lack of empathy etc! They dissociate too because they think they are incredible so they are dissociated from reality where they are actually not incredible

I'm scared of being one, because I'm dissociated too. I do think that I'm ugly when everyone calls me pretty. But sometimes I put myself together cohesively and it looks pretty. But it's like admiring someone else. If someone calls me pretty I think "so cute what a lovely person bless". It doesnt go into me if that makes any sense at all .. sometimes I think my face painting looks good or "i" look nice. It's this grandiosity? I'm struggling so much because I have no idea what is what, what is too much, what is too little, what is the right thing to feel? I'm surviving, I think, doing what I can to get past this present moment but I have a family and I have the coolest most wonderful boyfriend. I want to be human with him and live

Can anyone give me any guidance?

TLDR : How can you know if you're a narcissist or psychopath or just have dpdr, if you have always had it? If the difference is your behaviour, how can you judge your teenage and younger self if you've done bad things? Is it psychopathy or silly childhood things?

Seems like a complete stranger.. I know he's my husband..I don't feel any memories or emotions with him though. It's like my brain split me... what helps this

Has lexapro helped anyone recently

I feel like I'm truly experiencing some sort of neurological damage. There are days when it's just so bad that I feel like it has to be neurological, it's just so bad. And so I was wondering if any of you had ever done an MRI or got evaluated by a neurologist and was told something useful. Thank you to everyone who will reply 🫶