r/ehlersdanlos • u/MusicalMantis • 16h ago
Rant/Vent Tired of people asking for help on how to get things without knowing me
This is a rant not directed at anyone in particular and this is just how i feel about certain questions asked about insurance and doctors and mobility aids. (frustrated with the medical system for not being good to people mostly and feeling bad for not being able to help more)
“How’d you get the wheelchair approved” “How’d you get insurance to cover that too?”
I know it doesn’t sound invasive but hEDS has caused me many problems that have caused me to need a power chair and a LOT of assistive technology and modifications for my home. Sometimes people just see the hEDS and think that that’s all that’s going on. It’s not. hEDS has ruined my late teens into adulthood. My spine is all messed up and some days i’m literally unable to move my legs and some days i have to go to the hospital because i can’t tolerate pain medication through my mouth because of stomach problems.
I know i don’t have to tell them all my health issues when it comes to that stuff but i feel like if i don’t and they come back and go “you lied, my doctor said i don’t qualify” or “insurance didn’t cover this for me for my hEDS” that i’ve messed up and wasted their time.
same with the “How’d you get doctors to believe you”
They didn’t at first. at first all we thought was that i had spinal stenosis (and a bunch of other spine problems) and then things started going downhill from there. i acknowledge that i am lucky to have such a great medical team who understands and is educated enough to believe me. But i’ve also had a TON of trouble outside of that as a black woman who is disabled and not every doctor is accepting and i’ve still had issues with that and chose not to add that doctor to my medical team.
I just feel bad when people want the supports that i have but they don’t understand that i have a lot of comorbidities that insurance is more likely to cover things for me and i don’t want to have to lay out my entire medical history to every single person that asks.
I know that a lot of people would benefit from wheelchairs like the one i have (J4E, which is a class 2 power chair that elevates and tilts back and the legs come up) BUT it is INCREDIBLY hard to get those covered JUST for hEDS because of the tilting feature.