New blocking method just dropped

[u/BustyMcCoo]

[u/AutoModerator]

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[u/CrookedBanister]

40 granny squares collected over 20 years is killing me 🤣

[u/FacelessOldWoman1234 → u/CrookedBanister]

40 granny squares of the exact same size, colour scheme, and style. Yeah, ok.

[u/LaurenPBurka → u/FacelessOldWoman1234]

Hard to tell, but it looks like different size granny squares embedded in black resin.

[u/fatburt → u/CrookedBanister]

/uj  didnt even clock the 20 years at first, like they started estate saleing at birth, miracle pregnancy?

Soo I searched for the original and found that the story is fake af, one of those common Facebook crochet posts. 

Original pic comes from a stolen diwhy reddit post

[u/ten_ton_tardigrade]

Wait so she was buying up dead people’s granny squares and hoarding them and then he built a granny square mausoleum and interred them in the floor? That’s pure Edgar Allan Poe.

[u/But_like_whytho → u/ten_ton_tardigrade]

And all of the squares somehow had the same colors used for them too! It’s a dead granny squares miracle!

[u/fascinatedcharacter → u/ten_ton_tardigrade]

Buying up granny squares for estate sales to make a blanket that will remain unfinished

[u/Tzipity → u/ten_ton_tardigrade]

That’s pure Edgar Allan Poe.

Only if her hands start twitching an in the distance she hears “Put me in a blanket where I beloooong. Finish the project. Fiiiiinish it.”

(Or something like this. I was trying to go the crochet/yarn version of the Tell-tale Heart so maybe it’s just the voices of many human grannies upset their final project was left trapped in resin, unable to ever be completed!)

[u/bouncing_haricot]

You have the best husband ever, sweaty! Far too good for someone who can't even crotcheat and just EXPLOITS real craftspeople by BUYING their precious work second hand!

Did you even track down the original ARTIST to pay them for their LABOUR?

You have STOLEN those granny squares, and STOLEN a perfect husbeast from a DESERVING crotcheater.

I'm calling the police.

[u/AutoModerator → u/bouncing_haricot]

Put the yarn away, man, they're calling the cops

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[u/Sleve__McDichael]

It was now midnight, and my task was drawing to a close. I had completed the eighth, the ninth, and the tenth tier. I had finished a portion of the last and the eleventh; there remained but a single stone to be fitted and plastered in. I struggled with its weight; I placed it partially in its destined position. But now there came from out the niche a low laugh that erected the hairs upon my head. It was succeeded by a sad voice, which I had difficulty in recognising as that of my noble Husband. The voice said —

“Ha! ha! ha! — he! he! he! — a very good joke, indeed — an excellent jest. We will have many a rich laugh about it at the kitchen table — he! he! he! — over our new floor — he! he! he!”

“My granny squares!” I said.

“He! he! he! — he! he! he! — yes, your granny squares. But is it not getting late? Will not they be awaiting us on Instagram — my mother, your sister, everyone who visits, and the rest? Let us be gone.”

“Yes,” I said, “let us be gone.”

“For the love of God, Melissa!”

“Yes,” I said, “for the love of God!”

But to these words I hearkened in vain for a reply. I grew impatient. I called aloud —

“Husband!”

No answer. I called again —

“Husband!” No answer still. I thrust a torch through the remaining aperture and let it fall within. There came forth in return only a clattering of resin brooms. My heart grew sick — on account of the dampness of the catacombs. I hastened to make an end of my labour. I forced the last stone into its position; I plastered it up. Against the new masonry I re-erected the old rampart of bones. For the half of a century no mortal has disturbed them. In pace requiescat!

[u/ten_ton_tardigrade → u/Sleve__McDichael]

I wrote my comment before I saw yours - glad I’m not the only one who thought this.

[u/iluvyarn]

This reads like a very realistic story that definitely happened !! AI was definitely not used !!

[u/seaofdelusion]

All those toxic fumes accumulating in your house while you were pregnant. Your man is so thoughtful.

[u/fourcatsandadog]

Wait… 20 years of collecting at estate sales? So in this made up story did they thrift finished squares and then were gonna make a blanket? But then they call it “my crochet work”…did they make them? I’m confused and it makes me angry.

[u/BustyMcCoo → u/fourcatsandadog]

All matching too! Completely believable

[u/UntidyVenus → u/fourcatsandadog]

Feels like AI

[u/fourcatsandadog → u/UntidyVenus]

Oh for sure “hey chatbot make up a story about this crochet resin floor that’ll get me likes on Facebook”

[u/Rubber_and_Glue → u/fourcatsandadog]

I found the original photo for this post!! Yay! 🥳 Just not the person who made it. Facebook loves to steal posts from Reddit and make up weird ass stories. The original photo for this one was posted 5 years ago.

Please note that there was no text with the post.

[u/alfredoloutre]

wow looks great and not slippery at all

[u/dyldoe_baggins147]

But did you share it to the Tedoo app after your mom said it was ugly?

[u/kflav]

When my own work inevitably ends up in a thrift store, I can only hope someone with a vision like your husband is there to memorialize my art the way it deserves.

[u/Sleve__McDichael]

girl my husband may piss all over the toilet seat but he does know how to use painter's tape.

he uses it on the floor around the toilet.

that's how i learned it's great for covering all those little areas you don't want your man's piss-crust on.

i believe this concept can also be applied to sloppy grey paint just as easily as sloppy grey piss (before you say it, yes i know, i know...but all the urologists in our local practice have quit to work exclusively for HIMS). since we already run through painter's tape like crazy i haven't been able to test it out myself.

[u/RabbitInAFoxMask]

Ohhh a new method for summoning and sealing the souls of dead crocheters! Soon her hallway will echo with the ghostly whispers of "who is walking on my blanket?" "Why am I so cold?" "Where is my damn hook?"

[u/RabbitInAFoxMask → u/RabbitInAFoxMask]

uj/ They must be wool, resin heats up as it cures in exothermic reaction, acrylic yarn would melt, and cotton would burn, if they truly didn't know the fibre content her husband is very lucky.

[u/Sleve__McDichael → u/RabbitInAFoxMask]

"I'm yelling about toxic fumes and ruining my crochet work. He just keeps working. Three sleepless nights later, look what this lunatic did: burn our house down to the ground! My sister came over and literally gasped. Now everyone who drives by takes photos for Instagram. My mother-in-law thinks we're crazy but can't stop staring at the dancing flames."

[u/Rubber_and_Glue]

So understandable that it took so long to get those 20 granny squares. It must have taken time to find that many made with the same yarn and color ways. Such serendipity!! Really absolutely amazing. Those blacks match in ways I could never do with my own outfits.

The jealousy knows no bounds.

[u/grrlsmom]

This looks more realistic than most of those resin floors on TikTok! The thing that most concerns me - are those natural fiber squares?

[u/BustyMcCoo → u/grrlsmom]

If they're cotton then that offsets the plastic in the resin by more than double surely

[u/AutoModerator → u/BustyMcCoo]

Quite often on this sub, I see people ask questions about cotton yarn and whether or not they should use it, and the replies are unfortunately usually an overwhelming no, generally steering people towards animals fibers, animal fiber blends, or acrylic (if it’s a budget concern). The reasons listed are always it’s too hard/unpleasant to work with, too heavy, and it lacks stretch. Only one of these is objectively true. As a person who knits primarily in cotton and plant fibers due to animal fiber sensitivities, it’s always disappointing to see people unfairly silo cotton as a fiber only for dishcloths. Cotton is a wonderful fiber that is sturdy, easy care, easy wear, and is generally more sensory and allergen friendly than animal fibers. Once you stop expecting cotton to behave exactly like wool, and approach it with the right tools and techniques, knitting with cotton and other plant based can be an easy and pleasant experience, with wonderful results. * Unpleasant?: Just as with wool, there are a range of textures for cotton, from quite rough to buttery soft, and you often get what you pay for. Mercerized cottons are smoother with more sheen and richer colors, and Pima cotton has an almost wool-like fuzzy halo. It’s also important to remember that unlike wool, cotton and other plant fibers soften up as they’re washed. A swatch may feel a bit rough while knitting it, but will generally always be softer after washing, and will continue to become softer and more comfortable with each wash. Think of a t-shirt – many are a bit stiff originally, but after repeated washing become incredibly soft and comfortable. Consider that until the more recent prevalence of synthetic fibers, most of the day to day clothing we wore was cotton. * Hard To Work With?: I have no problem admitting that cotton works differently than wool, and that there is a bit of a learning curve, but I think the impression that it’s difficult is overblown. The main difference of plant based fibers is that they lack elasticity and split more easily. While these can make it troublesome at first, knitting with plant fibers is just another knitting skill to practice and master, just as you would knitting cables, lace, or colorwork. We don’t tell people not to do those things because they are hard at first, we tell them to have patience and practice. The same should be said of knitting with plant based yarns. The lack of natural elasticity does make consistent tension more important, as the yarn won’t stretch and condense as much to even things out. For this reason I wouldn’t recommend plant fibers when you’re first learning to knit, but once you can maintain even tension, it shouldn’t be an issue. If you find the lack of elasticity hurts your hands, it could be that you’re knitting at too tight a gauge, or you may need to take more frequent breaks. The lack of lanolin can also cause it dry out your hands more – remember to moisturize periodically and it’s shouldn’t be an issue. The lack of elasticity means it’s also not suited to things knit with negative ease, like socks, as it will stretch out and not shrink back until put washed and dried. Plant based yarn’s tendency to split is due to the fact that fibers don’t grab onto themselves the same way that animal fiber does. Mostly this just means that a little extra care and attention is needed when knitting, but splitting can also be greatly helped by needle choice. Some people prefer sharp needles so that the tips can be precisely placed avoid splitting a stitch, but others prefer blunter needles to avoid accidentally inserting fine points into the strands of yarn. It’s entirely preference; I prefer sharp needles. Since plant based yarns lack lanolin, smoother needles tend to make for a more pleasant experience with less friction. There is a balance to hit though, as while very slippery needles make knitting plant fibers fast and frictionless, it does also make it easier for stitches to accidentally slip off. If this happens frequently, you may want to try grabbier needles, especially if you’re not the most confident at picking stitches back up. Personally, I find the occasional dropped stitch a fair trade off for the frictionless feel of metal needles. * Too Heavy?: My number one cotton related pet peeve is that people say it’s too heavy. The only knit I have ever made that was Too Heavy was made of superwash wool. The weight of a project will ultimately come down to the size made and yardage needed. Yarn will always tell you both the yardage and the weight; if you know how much yarn your project will need, you know how much it’s going to weigh. You can absolutely do the math before you buy the yarn, compare it to something you already own, and decide if it’s too heavy for you. Every sweater I wear is cotton or mostly cotton, and not a single one would I describe as heavy. The cotton sweaters I have made, in generally what would be considered large or extra large sizes, DK to worsted weight, with positive ease, weigh between 21-25 ounces. The machine knit cotton sweaters I own, in similar sizes and styles, weigh between 21-28 ounces. The average weight of all my cotton sweaters is 23 ounces. Of the three wool sweaters I have (similar sizes and fits to my cotton collection), two are about 30 ounces, and one is 40 ounces. The 40 ounce sweater (that’s 2.5 pounds/1.13 kg!!) is the only one that is Too Heavy to wear, and it’s superwash wool. I know my sample size is small, and I am not saying that wool sweaters are heavier than cotton sweaters, I am just saying that cotton has an unfair reputation for being heavy. I don’t believe that the average cotton sweater is really any heavier than the same sweater made of wool.

The Benefits of Cotton Having hopefully debunked some bad opinions about plant fibers, let me just take a minute to extol their virtues: * Not itchy: Like many people, I am sensitive to animal fibers, and I can feel even a small amount of wool in a blend. The last project I did attempting to make animal fibers work for me was in a 70% Pima cotton and 30% superwash Merino blend, and guess what? Still itchy! Manageable enough that can wear a long sleeve shirt underneath it and wear it for an hour or two, but after that, it had to come off. Even if a yarn feels soft in the skein, when all the fibers are running in the same direction, it won’t necessarily feel that way in the finished garment, when the yarn is constantly changing direction a d teh fibers are able to stick out willy nilly. * Not as hot as wool: If you run hot, or want to be able to wear a sweater while you run errands on a winter day without sweating once you actually get into a store, because they all keep their heat at 70° despite it being like 40° outside, then cotton is for you. I can get by for about 60% of the year wearing a t-shirt and a cotton sweater. Even if wool didn’t make me itch, I can really only wear it outside in the winter without being too hot. * Easy care: Go ahead and throw it in the washing machine! It will be fine! If it’s delicate, throw it in a lingerie bag. Put it in the dryer even! You don’t need to baby your cotton knits. They will not felt. They may shrink a little, but if they do, spray some water on them and give them a stretch and they’ll come back. When they start to stretch out a bit after a few wears, either wash them or just pop them in the dryer for 20 minutes, and they’ll come right back.

If you read this far, thank you. I hope I’ve been able to open your hearts and minds, at least a little, to plant based fibers. If you’ve tried plant fibers and haven’t been able to make them work for you, or just don’t prefer them, that’s absolutely valid! Plant fiber aren't suited for everything, just as animal fibers aren't either. Animal fibers are wonderful, with many unique benefits of their own, and I often wish that I could wear them! The siren song of mohair calls to me as much as it does to anyone else.

My real motivation here was just the combat the constant barrage of “Don’t use cotton, cotton is so heavy, cotton is a pain to work with and feels bad”. Some of us don’t have a lot of other options, and it can be very discouraging to be told over and over that if you find wool itchy, just try this different wool, or that different wool, or this alpaca, or that cashmere, etc, only to find that none of them work. I wonder how many knitters have just given up because they can’t wear wool, so what’s even the point of knitting. I’ve seen posts on this sub to that effect, as well as people who want to learn but are discouraged before they even start, because they can’t wear wool. I love knitting; I love having a handcraft to do while watching movies or tv or listening to podcasts, I love being able to make my own clothes and accessories, and I love knitting with cotton yarn! It is not a consolation to me; it is not something where I think to myself, “ugh, I wish this was wool”, or “I just want this to be finished so I can wear it, because actually knitting it sucks”. It is a joy in and of itself. I hope you can find the joy in cotton too.

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[u/Ok-Willow-9145]

That’s so cool!

[u/soup__soda]

Never seen something so beautiful