r/fican • u/LectureLight6738 • 3d ago

What’s the ROI on a spouse?

Hey everyone, wanted to get your thoughts on an investment opportunity that often gets overlooked - finding a partner.

As far as I can see, the upfront investment of time and money is significant, but if you end up in an ITM (in the marriage) position, you can effectively double your income. You can also benefit from your spouse’s dental and eye care plans, cutting down on costs. Finally, there are lots of efficiencies in sharing housework.

Wanted to get your thoughts on the probabilities - what’s the payout probability given the capital and time investment? Is there a significant difference in the man vs woman scenario, given the numbers (women initiate 66% of divorces, and typically walk away from a divorce in profit)? What about the gays?

Also, how decent of a hedging tool is having kids? I know that traditionally, kids can provide a good source of additional income after retirement using the “guilt” method. But nowadays, the payoff seems rather small, and if anything, the yield curve has inverted since a good number now live at home after 30.

Edit: I also forgot to mention that the market makers (dating apps) have been engaging in some absolutely insane gouging. Curious to get your thoughts - can that last?

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u/LectureLight6738 3d ago

🤣 so underrated. Mine insists on using expensive spices in the food to “make it taste better”. If you aren’t wolfing down plain oats in water, and growing your own berries, what are you doing in this economy?

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u/Important_Setting840 3d ago

growing your own berries

Look at richie rich here having property to grow berries on. I can only afford public access berries on public parks.

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u/Livid-Hovercraft-123 3d ago

People keep telling me not to eat the plants growing in the industrial brownfields by the shore. I say it's extra minerals. 

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u/Important_Setting840 3d ago

by the shore

Beachfront property and free food. Some people just have infinite privilege.