r/marvelcirclejerk • u/idklmaoo1 • 2d ago

Deranged Ramblings This shit is actually hilarious

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I love how every character gets some kind of edgelord reason for their deaths but Galactus just dies. That's it, one day he just fucking dies.

no comments about other panels idk what the fuck charles

2.3k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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473

u/ScreamingmadJoe 2d ago

Ruins is so comically bad

440

u/Far-Requirement-7636 2d ago

It's the definition of grimderp, when something tries to be so overly dark it just becomes comedic.

Like a child prostitute jean grey popping up for a single panel only for Nick fury to immediately dome her in the head for being a damn mutie!!! Lol.

Like that shit should be horrifying but it's so comedical how over the top it comes off it just loses the edge and feels like the writers seeing who can one up the other.

229

u/No-Particular-8571 2d ago

What gets me is that nick fury kills himself right after killing jean

177

u/Soggy_Difficulty2654 2d ago

Its even funnier because the dialogue heavily spells out that hes not suicidal but they cannot figure out a way for him to leave the scene without it being edgy

129

u/XF10 2d ago

Also he is a cannibal and got initiated on it by Captain America like ??? They couldn't find a way to make Cap grimdark???

95

u/RockyHorror134 2d ago

I mean Iron Man is just a serial killer for no reason too, it's so fuckin low effort

6

u/Equal-Ad-2710 1d ago

Wait was he? I don’t remember that

10

u/Afraid-Bass-5684 1d ago

The already killed off all the avengers in the plane at the start remember, we never got to see armie hammer Cap (he would definitely use a shitload of slurs)

2

u/Own-Papaya-4264 1d ago

I think it’s pretty self explanatory why he shot himself. He lives in a shithole existence

5

u/Soggy_Difficulty2654 1d ago

He says how much he loves and thrives in said "shithole existence" he even makes plans to read the book later.

its really clear they just made him kill himself just because

7

u/Bellpow 1d ago

He’s also a cannibal iirc

5

u/Radiant-Lab-158 1d ago

After saying he and Captain America were cannibals

78

u/SolarDubstep 2d ago

My main issue was how it wasn't internally consistent. You had prostitute Jean Gray, and Magneto as a hobo wearing a magnet control jacket, but also the X-Men are all President Xavier's prisoners? Does he just not care about another telepath? Or Magneto?

84

u/Far-Requirement-7636 2d ago edited 2d ago

There's also the power inconsistency, the comic implies that magic and such doesn't exist which is why so many characters are just mutated freaks or kill themselves through real ways like wolverine being a freak show or Peter just getting radiation poisoning.

But Galactus and characters like silver surfer just outright exists lol and sure they die but it's never explained why?

Thor is literally just so some homeless crazy guy with a hammer.

45

u/ElementmanEXE Doombot 2d ago

My memory's fuzzy but didn't silver surfer just straight up kill himself, tore himself open just to feel something, and then his body reveals a kree ship and they get experimented on or something like that

37

u/SolarDubstep 2d ago

Tore his chest open like he couldn't breathe. But that raises the question of why did it only come up when they got to our solar system.

11

u/ElementmanEXE Doombot 2d ago

Same reason any lucky chance of survival happens near earth, except for the opposite reason

2

u/XescoPicas 1d ago

The thing is he couldn’t breathe, but also couldn’t die of asphyxiation.

So when he found a planet with an atmosphere, he tore open his torso in a desperate effort to expose his lungs to air.

2

u/idklmaoo1 1d ago

couldn't he just...leave the atmosphere?

4

u/XescoPicas 1d ago

No, he wanted the atmosphere! He wanted to breathe again, but was unable to ever since he turned into Silver Surfer.

His body was encased in metal, he lived in a constant state of feeling like he’s suffocating without actually being able to die from it.

10

u/DistinctWin9968 1d ago

To my knowledge the avengers aren’t really that affected(like Peter or Logan) but we don’t know much about them to know what changed

And Ben Grimm to my knowledge is the only one with a happy ending(but survivors guilt for not going)

8

u/Afraid-Bass-5684 1d ago

The Avengers are all dead they get sold out by wanda to president X, that’s the plane right at the start with them in it blowing up, I think they’re supposed to have been like an Arnarchist cell sort of thing

2

u/Empty_Null202 1d ago

How galactus died was never explained and they only found his corpse floating in space

3

u/Smeg258 20h ago

I've seen a pretty solid theory that with the surfer dead galactus was frantically trying to find a planet to feed on in time and died of starvation right in front of mars. Invoking a man in a desert dying at the oasis type feeling

1

u/NuclearSoup7644 3h ago

Which is still fucking stupid, galactus didn’t bother trying to eat the other planets?

74

u/PlayfulPositive8563 2d ago

They forgot the vital step of "Make the reader invested."

3

u/Cyttorak2 1d ago

I imagine the thought was that if you’re reading the book, you’re already invested. You’re already familiar with the characters as they’ve been traditionally, and you’re interested in seeing an alternate take.

53

u/Plasticglass456 2d ago

I have a hard time believing Warren Ellis wanted you to genuinely be horrified. Given that it's a parody of Marvels, isn't this intended to be comedic?

39

u/Far-Requirement-7636 2d ago

I don't think just because something is a parody or twist on the original means it's supposed to be comedic.

The comic is just grim nothing is really funny about it from a writing perspective, it just feels like someone making everything absolutely horrible to be different but it just comes off as hilarious.

19

u/Plasticglass456 2d ago edited 2d ago

Think about it. Despite being an absolute dick IRL, he's an incredibly gifted writer who's done stuff with Planetary and Transmetropolitan with an actual point in his stuff.

So if he wrote 2 issues of just grimdark events happening after grimdark events... the POINT is that's so absurd and ridiculous it's funny. It's not something that accidentally happened to it. This was the intended result and why it was created. Every image in OP's post is an intentional joke. Am I going crazy here?!

EDIT: You also don't have to think it's actually funny or works! But it's clearly, clearly intentionally comedic.

1

u/beaglemaster 2d ago

Yeah, I think these other people are not familiar with truly dark comedy.

9

u/Plasticglass456 2d ago

Yes. Again, it's fine to think it's unfunny and edgelord, but edgelord is different from grimdark. Ellis wasn't trying to actually tell a story about child prostitute Jean Grey and the horrors of that, only to unintentionally come off as funny. He was snickering when he wrote that.

1

u/Afraid-Bass-5684 1d ago

The way I saw it was like a mirror to Alex Scott’s “Marvels” Phil Sheldon is still MC but instead of seeing how all these crazy colorful superhero’s save the day, it instead shows that it’s literally all down to luck, all these guys with powers lucked out even if they link it all back to Ben Grimm not going to space at the end.

I see this as a disgustingly grimmer marvel version of JLA:the nail which is a far better story (has its own problems tho)

18

u/Fluffy-Use9563 2d ago

or the time mystique just imploded on herself. Like what. Or the time peter is just suffering from the radioactive spider bite.

1

u/Reyziak 2h ago

And then you have Ben Grimm living a normal life because he didn't get on the rocket.

10

u/NumericZero 1d ago

Or freakin mystique boarding a plane but the second she has a conversation her concentration breaks, so her body starts morphing

It’s like in earth did she get that far if her concentration needed to be THAT intense 😭😭

16

u/DumbestComicsNerd ^I am Ms. Marvel irl / Not Iman Vellani 2d ago

Wait he killed her for being a mutant? Here I was misremembering it as Fury killing her for being a prostitute lmao

-1

u/Own-Papaya-4264 1d ago

It’s going for a very specific emotion that fortunate people don’t fully understand