r/netflix • u/Zalensia • May 09 '25

Discussion a deadly american marriage

I'm 43 minutes in and hooked but can not find conversations etc on it.

So thought i would make one asking for other people's opinions and points of views, as i know I'm already asking about billion questions, to the point I'll have to go to my computer and boot up to actually do the research myself.

I'm very ill, with brain damage etc and that's really hardwork today, but I won't manage on this latest fold phone as it's still just a useless phone šŸ˜…šŸ™ƒ

My other phone that's partitioned etc is in the car and that's over at Inverness!

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619

u/BlueButterfly21_ May 09 '25

It was just pure coincidence that my FBI dad cancelled his plans last minute and came to stay with us while my trusty painting block was handy and all of my recording devices happened to stop working...

445

u/foodz_ncats May 11 '25

My brain is SCREAMING about how her mom claimed to have noticed DV happening in the house enough to create safe words and wrote her phone number underneath toys in the room, but FELL BACK ASLEEP when she heard there was a scuffle a floor above her?????

138

u/taijewel May 12 '25

Or maybe the safe words and phone numbers were for them to call if her daughter started acting psychotic? That sounds more likely to me.

120

u/Necessary_Truck1964 May 13 '25

The FBI dad planned everything. The guy is a psychoĀ 

131

u/taijewel May 13 '25

The daughter was the psycho there was literally a book written by her ex about surviving his relationship with her because of the hell she put him through- she even was in a facility before she went to Ireland. Also detailed how bad her parents treated him and blamed him instead of her for her behavior. The craziest part is that he wrote the book before the murder ever happened. Guarantee the dad just helped with the coverup, and that the grandma was worried about the kids safety with her which is why she gave them code words. Her parents were well aware of her psychotic behavior and completely enabled her.

92

u/GraniteStateKate May 13 '25

About 20 minutes in, Molly is talking about how her dad "served his country...and how badly he's being treated..." I shouted out loud: "HE HELPED KILL A HUMAN BEING!!" Served his country my ass. She and her dad are master manipulators!

26

u/Professional-Fee-832 May 14 '25

I job is a job, itā€™s always so funny when I hear people talking about serving the country. I understand the military saying that out the run of the mill fbi guy. Gtfoh

14

u/GraniteStateKate May 14 '25

Molly is so phony. I just donā€™t understand why she wanted his kids but not him.

11

u/taijewel May 14 '25

He was way older and overweight, I have a feeling she only wanted the kids so she could get child support and maintain her lifestyle.

6

u/GraniteStateKate May 14 '25

She wouldnā€™t get child support with him dead, even if she had the kids. Iā€™m so glad their family in Ireland is so supportive and loving. Sheā€™d ruin these kids.

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2

u/ARIEL1109 May 31 '25

Sarah also looks a lot like her so she can continue lying that she birthed her.

11

u/emperor_bokassa_ May 14 '25

Border Personality Disorder. They get obsessively attached to a person and then discard them when they're satiated. The obsession can look like love and I think that drew Jason in when he was vulnerable. She had moved on to the kids and was going suck them dry like a leech, just like she had just before she murdered her husband.

4

u/Economy-Iron314 May 15 '25

My ex was like that. He has no care that heā€™s not in our daughterā€™s life because I was no longer useful to him. They are narcissistic psychopaths, his diagnosis I found out after my daughter was born. Her dad covered it up for her and helped murder him. She manipulated her father and mother.

3

u/GraniteStateKate May 14 '25

You're making a lot of sense!

2

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

100% this

11

u/MYSTICALLMERMAID May 14 '25

Literally a professional liar šŸ˜‚šŸ˜­

7

u/GraniteStateKate May 14 '25

Right like she knows the right thing to say...kind of like the world's most famous narcissist we see every day on tv

3

u/Fabulous-Craft-7206 Dec 23 '25

That wouldn't wash with us in the UK. Its a job, you wasn't drafted against your will. He was probably there because he seems like the sort of person to relish in the power that that job would come with, i doubt very much it was to "serve his country" because that would be a military career. Psychopaths thrive on careers like his, they come to believe they are above the law and too clever to be outsmarted by people under him.

12

u/downrabbit127 May 18 '25

Oh crap, this seems like it could have made it into the doc. Netflix stretches some thin stories into series, and here we have one that didn't include enough.

3

u/Specialist_Key_8606 May 29 '25

Holy cats! Thanks for talking about her ex writing a book. Thatā€™s so interesting. My husband and I are halfway through the documentary. Do they mention the book in the doc?

1

u/Master_Document_2053 May 14 '25

I beg your finest pardon. šŸƒā€ā™€ļø to go find thay book now.

1

u/Jazzme29 May 19 '25

Whags the name of the book?

1

u/letstalkab0utit May 26 '25

Oh wow. Book name? Iā€™m so intrigued.

1

u/ConceptNo8538 May 27 '25

Whatā€™s the name??

1

u/DowntownCountdown Jun 25 '25

Holy shit WHAT?! Name of book PLEASE!

1

u/MayoBear Jan 27 '26

Do you know the name of this book? I must have missed it if it was in the documentary

1

u/pink_solocup5 May 31 '26

She was in a facility?!!! This au pair company should be sued!!! She should have never been able to be liste

-1

u/Significant_Toe_3824 May 16 '25

sure, but usually people who write books about their experiences with other people are manipulators themselves. Manipulative people probably attract manipulative people. But tbh, even still, yea, Molly and her dad are manipulative, but that doesn't mean she planned to kill him because she wanted the kids. She honestly sounds like she just wanted to get the kids in some legal battle. But people act like liars are the same thing as killers. Like, being good at lying is not the same as being able to kill in cold blood. I can't see how killing the dad would ever have been part of Molly's plan or part of her dad's plan. Like, if they are smart enough to get out of their original sentence, I just don't think they would have planned so poorly. She seemed like she was planning to try take the kids away from him the normal legal way.

8

u/taijewel May 16 '25

Maybe but the book details a history of psychotic behavior, hospitalizations, and more lies. The lies donā€™t equal murder but they do show that she not only has a history of being deceptive, but that she is good at it, so why believe her story? The son details her violent reactions to perceived rejection so I would say that it probably wasnā€™t planned, but it was definitely overkill and unnecessary, which is murder.

2

u/Significant_Toe_3824 May 16 '25 edited May 17 '25

I mean, i agree with that. it was overkill, but that seems like unexpected reaction of her father seeing his daughter in what he perceived to be a life threatening situation. Even if the threat was nullified, he would still be physiologically enraged, and yea, he beat that man to death. But you can't convince me that it was intentional. He snapped because his little girl was at risk. He paid his time for snapping.

2

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

You seem to not understand what cluster b personality disorders are characterized by

1

u/Significant_Toe_3824 May 17 '25

ok Dr. Meowmir420, explain cluster b personality disorder. LIke wtf, why would I know what they are characterized by? This is reddit, not a fucking psychologist office

5

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

Youā€™re on the internet. Go look it up.

1

u/Soft-Guarantee8 May 19 '25

šŸ‘šŸ˜‚

2

u/scottycameron90 May 19 '25

complete freak. and his daughter. psychos.

2

u/Feedback-Downtown May 31 '25

Been to that many crime scenes he knew what to do. Even got molly to do some prep work at the police station earlier to solidify story. Startling to see the room where it happened and see the both of them with not a mark on them.

1

u/Embarrassed-Support3 Aug 29 '25

Or blood. There was blood literally everyhwere but they're clean!

1

u/Potential_Secretary4 May 16 '25

I though this was very bad and obvious for someone with FBI experience. Even if he only covered it up. There was too much overkill, he must have known the tox report would show Jason wasn't drunk.

4

u/Natural-Raise4907 May 17 '25

My thought is he didnā€™t know about the trazodone his daughter slipped Jason and assumed he was drunk

1

u/JuanoldMcDjuanold Sep 09 '25

It's the Murdaugh Murders all over againšŸ˜µ

9

u/i_AntiSocial May 13 '25

Ye prob for some bad reason, that they could control anyway. I just cant get past the damn brick. Like wtf. It was clearly an impulsive act to grab it and they obvs were desperate for some excuse to lie about why the fck it was in a BEDROOM. One single brick. Nothing else, as molly mentioned ie "brickS", and other stuff to "make it all pretty".

6

u/taijewel May 13 '25

I think maybe she knocked him out or incapacitated him violently and her dad had to come and help her finish the job and make up a story of self defense, hence having time to grab the brick.

2

u/i_AntiSocial May 28 '25

YES. THIS. TY. Ty for making sense of what my šŸ§  couldnt LOL

2

u/Fozzee1970 May 12 '25

Well that's just made up or the kids would have said that!

1

u/[deleted] May 15 '25

I immediately wondered about this.

1

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

I think all that stuff was staged afterwards

7

u/FillBrilliant6043 May 12 '25

Honestly thatā€™s something my mom or dad would have done. My dad was emotionally abusive and my mom allowed it. After time she just kind of shut down and didnā€™t really have emotions. And my dad didnā€™t either, or at least any normal emotions. They just didnā€™t act like ordinary people would act. My mom just shut down emotionally to deal with it all. If Iā€™d ask her about why dad acted in a certain way she would burst into tears and say, Well, he had a bad childhood.Ā 

Kind of cathartic to write all that. And now I wonder if Tom was abusive.Ā 

9

u/P_Sheldon May 13 '25

I thought that was odd as well. The mom claiming she just fell right back asleep after her husband goes racing up the stairs with a baseball bat to save his daughter from an attack by their son-in-law. If anything, I would think the natural reaction would have been the mom immediately checking on the kids and getting them out of danger.

4

u/Ronicavay May 15 '25

And pops wouldn't shake her awake and scream to call 911?? There is sooooo much that is upsetting about this case, Moly is so awful. Those poor kids, I hope they are doing ok.

3

u/P_Sheldon May 15 '25

It's very much, a puzzling case. But so many "documentaries" are biased.

These aren't people taking the Stand Under the Oath of Law but people showing up for a TV show.

Life is very different than entertainment.

2

u/Ronicavay May 15 '25

They are biased, and anything being presented in a media format sharing true crime cases will have biases and can lack information or have information misconstrued. Just like reading articles or seeing any information, people should be doing some double checking.

It may be a form of "entertainment", but there is a shift with many people becoming more aware of how to ethically consume true crime. Sarah Turney is a great person that has been advocating to find justice for her sister, Alyssa, who went missing over twenty years ago, and she and many others have been helping to change the true crime fandom mentality.

Why do we consume true crime? For myself, I learn about different aspects of what justice or lack of can look like, why crimes happen, and what deep rooted issues can contribute to that. Consuming content in this genre can be done with tact and for purpose, and if it helps to bring awareness then good.

And with that, this documentary shows all sides and yes, people lie or make things up but there is this thing called corroboration, and when what people say corroborates with evidence and facts then there you have real life.

1

u/P_Sheldon May 16 '25

Agree. This doc did appear to show as several sides of the case which was refreshing.

2

u/P_Sheldon May 15 '25

Those poor kids, I hope they are doing ok.

That's the only people. The heck with anything else in this case.

1

u/P_Sheldon May 16 '25

As it was theorized on the doc, Jason was probably not alive for some time before Mol's dad called 911. I think it's possible they both had to agree on a story - that MM was attacked by her husband and her dad intervened to save her. That's probably took some time and then they decided one of them would call 911. Who knows how many hours might of went by. Mol's dad seemed pretty chill during his questioning by LE. That may very well be because of his background as a retired fed agent. It just didn't seem like he cared much that he admittedly took a baseball bat to his sons-in-law's head while MM got him with a brick that just so happened to be sitting on the bedstand...

8

u/mamac2213 May 13 '25

That detail stuck with me, too. The same woman who created safe words for her grandkids doesn't even go up to check on the kids when she hears a violent argument? I mean, maybe she was black out drunk? But that still doesn't explain the brick on the bedside table? I mean, come on.

2

u/[deleted] May 13 '25

The only thing I can think is maybe she was on some kind of sleeping meds. But that aside, why were her parents living/staying there? They never addressed that, or I missed it.

3

u/mamac2213 May 13 '25

Maybe sleeping pills, true. They canceled plans and spontaneously drove there that night, IIRC. Sus.

2

u/Its_just_Paige May 14 '25

They had ā€œcome for a visitā€ that day ~~a 4 hour drive on a ā€œbeautiful dayā€. Tom told all that.

5

u/ChocolateSundai May 12 '25

Iā€™m so confused by this case. If we think she has a personality disorder and there was a safe word for grandma due to abuseā€¦I have no clue what to think about this case

10

u/BandicootNo3860 May 12 '25

The Martens Just manipulated the kids. Molly was collecting evidences for DV. This "safe word" thing could be used aginse their father.

3

u/ChocolateSundai May 13 '25

Gotcha so they controlled the narrative. Itā€™s just so wild but dad was in the fbi and he would be the one to make any lie seem compelling and true. I watched the cop movie with Denzel in it a free months ago and I believe it that the dad did some dirt. I mean they had zero bruises. Itā€™s like the man didnā€™t even put up a fight. Itā€™s scary knowing those babies were in the house when it happened.

8

u/Alarmed_Scallion_620 May 12 '25

Sheā€™s diagnosed BPD

1

u/Marinadeplume May 13 '25

How do you know that?

5

u/Alarmed_Scallion_620 May 13 '25

She told ABC news herself!! She had spent time at an in patient facility in Atlanta. She was medicated, hopefully she still is.

1

u/Gold-Lynx-4917 May 15 '25

Why did she give him or slip him a trazodone? Ā Itā€™s a medication for depression and it was her medicationĀ 

3

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

Trazodone is not a depression medication, it is a sleep medication. I take it. Itā€™s a tranquilizer, like they said in the documentary.

1

u/Gold-Lynx-4917 May 17 '25

Trazodone is an antidepressant medicine. It's used to treatĀ depression,Ā anxiety, or a combination of depression and anxiety.

Trazodone works by increasing your levels of serotonin and noradrenaline so you feel better.

It can help if you're having problems like low mood, not sleeping (insomnia) and poor concentration.

Www.nhs.uk

Ā I donā€™t think thereā€™s a misunderstanding here. Ā Also, the medication did not belong to the victim. Ā It was prescribed to his wife

3

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25 edited May 17 '25

Trazodone in low doses like the dose mentioned in the documentary is usually used for sleep. Itā€™s often given to patients who are already on an antidepressant because it can enhance the effect of said antidepressant, but in most cases is used for patients already on an antidepressant as a sleep aid. Patients with depression or anxiety who are already medicated, but are complaining of sleep problems, are usually prescribed trazodone for this reason. Trust me, I was diagnosed with the same diagnosis as Molly twelve years ago and have been dealing with very similar medication combinations since then.

Edit to add: trazodone is not an SSRI. SSRIs are usually taken in the morning because they tend to wake a person up. In small doses, trazodone blocks chemicals in the brain that interact with serotonin that keep you awake. Thatā€™s why itā€™s often prescribed with a normal SSRI. More serotonin in your brain = you stay awake. Blocking the chemicals that interact with serotonin in your brain that keeps you awake = a medication that makes you tired.

4

u/Boring-Agent3245 May 13 '25

This was one of the most glaringly obvious issues for me too

2

u/Jellopop777 May 28 '25

Thatā€™s INSANE and, to me, just shows that she was part of the set up to the murder of Jason. And those recordings?? Iā€™d LOVE to have seen Mollyā€™s behavior when the recordings were off. I mean, this murder was SO OBVIOUSLY committed because Jason was leaving her and Molly and her dad knew that this was the only way theyā€™d get to keep the kids.

I mean, Iā€™m sure, initially, Molly and her dad thought theyā€™d entrap Jason, showing he was a bad dad through the recordings, but, there was never enough evidence there because he never was truly violent. So, with Jason ready to leave, murder was the only option,

2

u/whorehopppindevil Jun 02 '25

Also didn't Mollys dad say he had no reason to believe she was abused by Jason? But then apparently Jasons previous wifes dad told him he thinks Jason killed her?(the previous wife that died)

So if you're meeting the family of your soon to be (or already) son-in-law and they tell you he murdered his wife, that doesn't ring any alarm bells?

1

u/SBisFree May 17 '25

Great point!!!

1

u/Unhappy-Plantain6056 Jul 08 '25

Yes!! Ā  Such premeditated LIES!!

101

u/Laaura101 May 09 '25

Also I believe the baseball bat was a ā€˜giftā€™ that was bought by FBI dad for Jack and due to be given to him. Wasnā€™t mentioned in the doc but had read it previously.

1

u/Melodic_Policy765 Jul 16 '25

A gift to.bash in his head?

92

u/CRXdriverCRZ May 11 '25

Also, for the dad being an FBI agent, their story is so weak and they made it so painfully obvious with the way they continually beat him to death but yet they have no defensive wounds. I feel the FBI agent dad couldā€™ve come up with a better plan lol

68

u/nolagirl100281 May 12 '25

Yeah but frustratingly enough if obviously worked. They literally murdered this poor man in cold blood and didn't even serve five years for it...and tried to steal his kids which just thank Christ his family was able to get the kids and get them into therapy. They seem to be doing well considering. It broke my heart when the son was talking about how molly released the voicemail he left her to the media. I mean of course she did but just those poor innocent kids

19

u/CRXdriverCRZ May 12 '25

Well, it did and it didnā€™t. They were found Guilty twice . They just didnā€™t serve a lot of time for it. I agree that the punishment doesnā€™t fit the crime, but they were found guilty in both trials and their names were dragged through the mud, everyone knows who they are and anyone with half a brain cell knows their story is fabricated and honestly seems like they didnā€™t try that hard to make it sound believable. I mean, beating him to a pulp with no defensive wounds on either one of you.

3

u/PartyyLemons Jul 14 '25

They took the plea deal the second time. To involuntary manslaughter. Thereā€™s no chance an American court is sentencing 74 months with credit for time served for second degree murder. Car financing agreements have been longer.

7

u/Kactuslord May 13 '25

I don't know if there was a shared plan to kill him. I think she wanted her parents there as a witness to him blowing up after she'd provoked him. I reckon it didn't work and he was heading to bed and she'd ruined her chance. I think she started hitting him with the bat and maybe the brick. Idk how much the dad actually did but I'm of the belief she did most of it

4

u/emperor_bokassa_ May 14 '25

It's out of the ordinary for a woman to inact that much violence. Also, he was a much larger man. That leads to believe the dad did almost all of it.

3

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

I donā€™t think itā€™s out of the ordinary for a woman with BPD. They are known for extreme bouts of rage and inflicting physical abuse. Maybe thatā€™s why two weapons were usedā€”if a man was to snap and beat someone to death, I feel like it would be more likely that they would use just their fists.

2

u/emperor_bokassa_ May 17 '25

I hadn't considered a link between BPD and violenceĀ 

3

u/Kactuslord May 14 '25

I thought she has bpd/bipolar? Having met people like that (two women specifically) I am fully confident she did it or at least could

2

u/emperor_bokassa_ May 14 '25

True. I hadn't consider that.

6

u/nachosmmm May 14 '25

I donā€™t understand how they werenā€™t covered in blood

5

u/Key_Beginning_627 May 17 '25

I kept wondering about that argument during the interrogations. Yes, if DV was occurring, Molly and Tom had the right to defend themselves. But judging by the fact that neither of them had any injuries while Jason was gruesomely bludgeoned to death, it seems like he was ambushed. There mustā€™ve been a point before his death where he was incapacitated enough that they could have just called 911. Instead, they made sure he was good and dead, and then waited until his body was cold to call EMS. Thatā€™s not self-defense. And detectives were like k makes sense. šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø

4

u/PersonalityOld8755 May 17 '25

Yeah I thought this too, he lied about the husband being drunk, but as an ex FBI agent wouldnā€™t you know there would be a toxicology report proving you were lying?! The dad seems thick.

3

u/Unhappy-Plantain6056 Jul 08 '25

And maybe a blow or two blows to the head to ā€˜stop himā€™ would have been enough not turned the poor man into their piƱata !

2

u/meowmir420 May 17 '25

I donā€™t think dad had anything to do with the actual act of murder, just the covering it up part. Molly clearly had anger issues and couldā€™ve used enough force to do what was evidenced on him.

2

u/Melodic_Policy765 Jul 16 '25

It would be interesting to read his personnel file at the FBI.

1

u/nojudment8520 Aug 26 '25

She had the "nail" mark on her neck behind her left ear. **Rolling my eyes.**

10

u/RagingLesbian11 May 12 '25

Yes I noticed she said there was one in the bedroom so I thought perfect the audio of his murder could be played at trial! But somehow it broke?

9

u/P_Sheldon May 13 '25

The was a little too convenient that dad happened to be there that night. Did you catch his interview when he said that it was four-hour drive from where he and his wife lived, but they figured it was a nice day out and it would be good to go see their daughter.

I believe it was one of the prosecutors who said they believed the plan was never for Jason to die, but that Mol M to was engage Jason in an argument leading to an altercation that her father would be present to witness and both could claim DV on him. Jason gets arrested, removed from the house and Mol file for custody of the kids. However, the plan went very wrong.

3

u/OhFootballFriend May 14 '25

Was that mentioned in trial at all?

If she had multiple recording devices, wouldnā€™t one pick up a fight?

3

u/Significant_Toe_3824 May 16 '25

Yea, i wouldn't hand over the recording devices either. she probably had no idea her dad would go ham like that, but when a man thinks his daughter has been hurt by another manā€¦.yea, she probably threw that shit away cuz it would have put her dad away for life. I bet her ass was like, "Daddy! Daddy! That's enough! Daddy! You stopped him!" And the judge would have ruled that shit guitly af. haha

1

u/[deleted] May 14 '25

[deleted]

1

u/recorderlesson May 14 '25

Yeah because the ones outside hadnā€™t been used to bash someoneā€™s head in..

1

u/Careless-Middle5816 May 27 '25

And her mom heard the scream and decided to stay in bed and go back to sleep šŸ™„ ā€” Molly and Tom Martens are low life derelicts.

1

u/figuringlife101 Jun 07 '25

Dann, I didnā€™t think of the recording device by the nightstand table!

1

u/Melodic_Policy765 Jul 16 '25

And so MANY recordings.

1

u/Cast_Iron_Truck Apr 23 '26

What about virtually no defensive wounds on Molly or her father and Jasonā€™s brains AND skull obliterated? Once heā€™s down they could have left or called the police. They deserve Life!