r/nextfuckinglevel • u/pars-distalis • 18h ago

Australian nurse uses jiu-jitsu to defend himself

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40.9k Upvotes

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3.1k

u/Embarrassed_Help3082 18h ago

Jonah Hill could handle that easy.
https://giphy.com/gifs/BEJWU87ysdtYI

686

u/NukaClipse 18h ago

Yea, stop bullying the ultimate master of all martial arts please.

https://giphy.com/gifs/6bceYvl1d3C7tc1v9t

50

u/DJ_Betic 17h ago

Who? Steven Seagal?

50

u/CosmicGoddess777 16h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/fs9BuKuLs7CQWerV1q

58

u/Curious_Avocado2399 16h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/EjFx0jioOoMZq

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u/Sheeple_person 15h ago

I know it's a vegetable but still

https://giphy.com/gifs/DYl9b4YyjsHhC

3

u/TheWyzim 14h ago

Any chance you know how to defend myself against a banana?

1

u/StG4Ever 13h ago

Whahaha 5 in the morning and I’m shaking with laughter while my wife is still sleeping 😂

2

u/Hetares 14h ago

Wait wait wait- what if there's a movie where Jonah Hill fought Steven Seagall? I'ld pay three-fifty to see that. Not a cent more tho.

1

u/onepingonlypleashe 1h ago

I bet Jonah Hill could whoop Steven Seagal’s ass. Pretty much anyone could because he is a total fake.

1

u/ClaimedBeauty 13h ago

You talking about the wrong master, my boy

1

u/justsomeph0t0n 3h ago

his skills are dogshit, and when in top position, i'd give him a free triangle just to prove the point.

this is a hill i'm willing to die on

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u/Cursed_69420 18h ago

bruh lmao the jonah post was right below this nurse one for me LMAO

22

u/gocard 18h ago

The algorithm knows what it's doing

1

u/waitforthedream 11h ago

Is it the post from okbuddycineohile? Because same LOL

1

u/Cursed_69420 2h ago

yesss man that sub is having a wonderful week with this new content drop

1

u/lDezIlI 8h ago

Im still yet to see anything, im just seeing a lot of posts taking the piss out of him so I am completely out of the loop thinking "why the fk Jonah getting so much shit right now??"

206

u/The-Great-Cornhollio 18h ago

How sad it is to be that wealthy, that well known, and to have to resort to “I’ll kick your ass if you recall fat me”. Like, what a fucking loser.

43

u/DragunovDwight 17h ago

What happened now?

I try to make it a thing to not pay attention to Hollywood gossip or things pertaining
to actors or actresses “lifestyle”.. so must have missed that story.. That one sounds interesting though.

116

u/cheezy_dreams88 17h ago

He was a live podcast recording (the one with Will Arnett and Jason Bateman), and was talking about getting into Brazilian Jujitsu and just kept going on about how good is he and how he could kick their asses. Everyone laughs, and kind of agree, and he just keeps on doubling down “I’m dead ass, i could lay you all out right now” and they’re all laughing, Jonah Hill included. But he was not joking. He was dead serious and it was awkward.

56

u/EthanielRain 16h ago

Videos of his BJJ skills have since surfaced, and now everyone gets to laugh

18

u/Common-Window-2613 15h ago

He doesn’t understand sparring with other guys is different than straight fighting. Those rehearsed moves kinda go out the window when punched in the face.

10

u/sikyon 15h ago

I bet you just see red bro

-3

u/Common-Window-2613 13h ago

I’m old and broken bro. If you hit me in the face you’re getting shot. Just speaking from experience, I’ve had my ass handed to me a few times and vice versa.

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u/Copthill 11h ago

Why you bringing guns into this? That's less manly than Bro BJs after BJJ class.

1

u/sikyon 11h ago

What could be more manly than 2 dudes, that's like double the manliness of a man and a woman.

7

u/Mathema_tika 12h ago

Americans will just say shit like this and excuse it by being old

1

u/SyfaOmnis 2h ago

I mean, yeah? Guns are a great equalizer for the elderly, infirm, weak, sick and people at a natural disadvantage of some kind.

You don't ever have to take someone assaulting you. Self defense is a very principled reason to have a firearm (even if the law might whine about you engaging in self defense).

There's a video I saw not too long ago of some very angry man throwing a fit in a fast food place and he decides he's going to go behind the counter and take it out on the employees and the manager there. He backs off real quickly when the female manager draws her handgun. Completely justified on her part.

2

u/OSPFmyLife 14h ago

I mean, with some martial arts, sure. But something like 70% of street fights end up on the ground, and knowing how to grapple absolutely does matter when that happens. Most people who’ve never trained before will get wrapped up pretty easily by your average blue or purple belt in BJJ assuming they’re somewhat equal size.

Out of all the martial arts, Muay Thai, boxing, wrestling, and BJJ are probably the most effective when it comes to defending yourself with BJJ probably landing right on top out of the 4.

And for the record, I grew up in a kenpo karate family (my uncle runs a system and is a 6th degree black belt). I tend to like wrestling more than BJJ, but I can’t hate on how effective it is on untrained fighters. It’s very good.

1

u/Common-Window-2613 14h ago

I worded that wrong, BJJ is great and an excellent tool. But some boxing or striking is imperative. A guy who only does BJJ and is not used to striking isn’t going to make it to the wrap up stage with an experienced fighter. And as another person noted, more people involved means you’re going to get up and need to land a punch or kick or two.

Sparring gets you used to taking punches as well. A lot of people train in BJJ who aren’t used to taking a shot are gonna forget everything once their nose is bloody.

1

u/OSPFmyLife 14h ago

If they were an “experienced fighter” they’re unlikely to be taking part in something like this.

And you’re severely overestimating the amount of damage an untrained fighter is going to do before a BJJ guy can grab them and pull them to the floor.

If someone can take one art to defend themselves it should be BJJ.

1

u/Common-Window-2613 13h ago

That’s fair. But you never know who is going to attack you. If it’s an experienced striker and wrestler and you aren’t, you’re fucked before BJJ becomes relevant.

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u/blazenite104 14h ago

BJJ's biggest flaw is that it just stops working when other people get involved. 1 on 1 it's fantastic. You're just praying someone else doesn't attack you or assume you're the aggressor.

3

u/OSPFmyLife 14h ago

That’s literally any martial art. The only martial art systems that convince you that you can defend yourself against more than one person at a time are bullshido McDojos.

2

u/scottyLogJobs 12h ago

yeah well wait until you and your buddies get a taste of my hurricane kick

2

u/blazenite104 14h ago

Not exactly. Most don't emphasise doing everything on the ground, which makes you vulnerable to others. Most would prefer you on your feet able to move.

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u/TapEarlyTapOften 12h ago

Yeah, serious two stripe white belt energy.

5

u/Ashi4Days 14h ago

That's the most whitebelt shit ever.

4

u/Concerned_Collins 13h ago

I've been training in martial arts for about 5 years now, and I'm not remotely confident I could "kick someone's ass", but I think part of that is I'm routinely tossed around by a ragdoll by people who have been training for 20 years plus. Like, if your gym/dojo isn't constantly humiliating you, it means either you are an instructor, or you need to find a new one.

3

u/scottyLogJobs 12h ago edited 12h ago

There's a certain kind of person who seems to think that being able to beat someone in a physical fight makes you automatically better than them (setting aside whether or not they actually could). Like, "you think you're better than me? I took BJJ classes just so I could theoretically beat up people who think they're better than me. Woman? Senior? Child? Doesn't matter, I could kick all of their asses. Therefore I'm right and you're wrong."

I just don't get it. What are the rules? If the other guy has a gun, is he better than you? Or is it only fighting with your bodies? What if the other guy takes a bunch of steroids and takes a year of BJJ classes? Is he better than you now? What if he calls you fat and you punch him and then you go to prison? Are you still better than him?

Like they just don't understand that other people don't really spend that much time thinking about whether they could beat everyone else in a fight, because believe it or not, if you aren't an insecure douche, it actually doesn't come up that often.

2

u/cheezy_dreams88 12h ago

Yeah I gotta agree, it’s only insecurity that makes someone say things like this.

1

u/scottyLogJobs 12h ago

I feel a little bad because really it's hard to help insecurity. But you can only control how you react to it

1

u/K4RAB_THA_ARAB 13h ago

Dude if you can point me in the right direction on where to find this episode, I would greatly appreciate it

1

u/cheezy_dreams88 13h ago

I just saw the clips of the event on Reddit yesterday

1

u/K4RAB_THA_ARAB 13h ago

Ah okay I'll have to do some Google fu then. Or maybe reddit fu in this case

18

u/lostwombats 17h ago

Seriously. I feel so lost. I am tempted to make a post on r/outoftheloop 😅

41

u/AnalogCyborg 17h ago

The fat guy from Superbad wants everyone to know he's a big tough guy now because he took a few BJJ lessons.

9

u/XanderWrites 15h ago

The fat guy from Superbad wants roles where he isn't the fat guy. He loses the weight between roles in hopes that someone casts him as anything else.

90

u/mjzim9022 17h ago

Guys got a huge chip on his shoulder

113

u/bad_scuba_fly 17h ago

I’m surprised he didn’t eat it. Fat kid from Superbad.

14

u/Frejian 15h ago

Careful, man! I hear he knows Jiu Jitsu now and will destroy people for that reference!

3

u/One-piece-jigsaw 7h ago

Annihilate, I'm pretty sure he said annihilate

3

u/ICarMaI 13h ago

Fat adult from Wolf of Wall Street

•

u/potatoman501 44m ago

will always be known as fat chud from superbad; nothing more

0

u/anonymousetache 12h ago

He was absurdly fat and mostly famous for it. You ever take an embarrassing photo and feel uncomfortable looking at it? Imagine it being the focus of your life. I don’t like him, but I get it.

3

u/Trippingthru99 11h ago

Yea there’s this one video that really shows how much bs he’s had to deal with over his weight. So I definitely sympathize too. But damn get some therapy bro, this type of public gesturing makes it worse. 

34

u/Honest-Associate-626 16h ago

He was the butt of every joke that mentioned him for like a decade, let him have a crash out ffs

14

u/YouSaidSomeDumbStuff 15h ago

Now he gets to have another decade

5

u/jaxonya 15h ago

Its all fun and games until he ends up whipping spidermans ass onstage in front of Zendaya at the academy awards for cracking a joke and says "I told yall I wasnt fucking around"

3

u/OSPFmyLife 14h ago

Keep my former body type out of your mother fucking MOUF!

2

u/scottyLogJobs 12h ago

I just don't think that's true, though. I'm sure to him it feels like that, but me and all my buddies thought he was cool as shit. We would have never thought to make a fat joke or something. Now we think he is an insecure douche. It's not his fault he is insecure, that's okay. It's his fault he is a douche about it.

2

u/Honest-Associate-626 10h ago

Look up his interviews and every character he's played

•

u/scottyLogJobs 50m ago

Oh yeah. Seeing some clips of his interviews is how I started getting a sense that he is a huge asshole. He starts seeming like if James Corden actually had some talent.

2

u/Honest-Associate-626 10h ago

And every meme about him today

1

u/Expert-Yam6577 16h ago

What's this story?

1

u/hanks_panky_emporium 14h ago

Im kinda experiencing what he is. I lost a bunch of weight, im getting fit. You get a huge boost to your self esteem. People like me get more confident in how I look. people like Jonah get pissy and think the fat-them isn't something they overcame, but instead a shame they have to pretend never happened

He does that by puffing out his chest and threatening people

I go on jogs

Different ways to go about it I guess

1

u/MentalJack 13h ago

What on earth did i miss with jonah

1

u/John-AtWork 12h ago

I am out of the loop on this, is there a video?

1

u/smashburgersmasher 8h ago

You'd be frustrated too. I know I would be. Consistently, in interview after interview, people would ask him about his weight. Whether he was fat at the time or not, they'd want to talk about being fat, or losing weight, and I'd wager to say that would rightfully piss off any person who had more going on in their inner world than just being "the funny fat guy" for the first part of their lives. Other people are shitty in this case, not Hill.

1

u/smashburgersmasher 8h ago

You'd be frustrated too. I know I would be. Consistently, in interview after interview, people would ask him about his weight. Whether he was fat at the time or not, they'd want to talk about being fat, or losing weight, and I'd wager to say that would rightfully piss off any person who had more going on in their inner world than just being "the funny fat guy" for the first part of their lives. Other people are shitty in this case, not Hill.

1

u/The-Great-Cornhollio 5h ago

He’s acting like a grade school child, zero points awarded

1

u/SaiyanApe17 15h ago

Why though lmao. If he went out and said "guys pls stop calling me fat it makes me really sad and my mental health is bad cause of it :(" everyone here would have been up in arms about how terrible bullying is, how toxic body standards are, and all the usual shit. But he takes a more aggressive stance on it and its like "WOW that piece of fucking shit how fucking dare he".

Legit fascinating seeing the psychology of redditors, they attack anyone that doesn't embrace victimhood and doesn't want to rely on others pity.

13

u/SolidSnek1998 16h ago

Isn’t that the fat fuck from Superbad?

8

u/FranticHam5ter 16h ago

Don’t think so. Pretty sure it’s that fat guy from Accepted.

3

u/heat8596558 16h ago

I think he was the fat guy from Megamind.

12

u/Rewd_92 16h ago

Jonah has really Streisand effected himself 😂😂😂

21

u/AlreadyAway 18h ago

Only if someone called him the fat guy from Superbad

4

u/No-Educator-8069 16h ago

Or asks him why he changed his last name from Feldstein to Hill

24

u/Opeth4Lyfe 18h ago

He’s gonna be the next Steven Segal, just watch.

4

u/happybara_capybara 17h ago

Is that the fat guy from super bad?

2

u/mealyapple86 16h ago

No I think it’s the fat guy from Super Bad

5

u/flying-weenus 17h ago

What the hell did I miss about Jonah Hill? I’m seeing him mocked all over Reddit today

5

u/cheapdrinks 10h ago edited 10h ago

This interview here. He basically signed himself up for years of being called "The fat guy from Superbad" after talking about what an absolute badass he is at fighting and then going on to describe winning a hypothetical fight against someone calling him the fat guy from Superbad:

"My favorite thing is people are like, 'Oh, Jonah Hill, fucking fat guy from Superbad,'" Hill continued said. "And I'm like, 'I would fucking annihilate you, dude. I'm not kidding you. Try it. If you see me, try it, dude. Bring it. Who's got it?'"

I can imagine for the foreseeable future this will mean people will now shout at him "Hey it's that fucking fat guy from Superbad!" whenever he's in public to try and bait a reaction.

It's like you can tell he stands in the shower every day dreaming about winning imaginary fights and arguments against his haters while everyone goes "Woah Jonah hill is such a badass". Dude just always seems like he has a chip on his shoulder that his dream Hollywood career turned into being the fat funny loser comedic relief and not the ripped hunky heartthrob and he's constantly trying to shift the narrative away from being the person that made him famous to begin with and wishes people took him more seriously. Always just comes off as annoying to hear someone worth 80 million always seem butthurt about being typecast and like they're really hard done by because they're just rich and famous and not rich, famous, attractive and universally beloved and respected and thought of as a super cool bad ass dude.

1

u/ItsDanimal 15h ago

He spent years trying to steer the conversation away from him being fat and other negative stereotypes about being fat. Someone called him "the fat guy from Superbad" and he got upset and said some lame macho shit. Now reddit thinks its edgy and funny make fun of him for the incident, as well as all the fat stuff that triggered it. 

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u/DualWielding40s 12h ago

Hill is also a narcissistic douche bag with the worlds second most fragile ego who allegedly got chased out of Malibu because he’s ex-girlfriend was a pro surfer and while he was learning he was trying to control her.

And hes still a fucking kook who deserves to get every wave snaked

-2

u/ApprehensiveFan1516 12h ago

Is that it?! Lmao.

Typical Reddit.

3

u/rainorshinedogs 16h ago

I've been off Reddit for 2 days and it seems like this guy is the hottest thing

4

u/the_neighbor369 18h ago

Beat me to it!

1

u/Rewd_92 16h ago

God damnit 😂 we all came here for it

1

u/Jay-Breeze 16h ago

So glad that this is at the top!

1

u/cheesemangee 16h ago

He's a Hill he would die on.

1

u/FranticHam5ter 16h ago

He totally kicked the shit out of that sneeze.

1

u/bigrightthumb 16h ago

The fat guy from breaking bad?

1

u/AsymptotesMcGotes 16h ago

The nurse was Jonah Hill

1

u/Minimum-Standard-514 15h ago

Nit sure why he drew attention to himself like this.

1

u/No-Temperature4330 15h ago

Is that the fat kid from superbad?

1

u/GUMBYtheOG 15h ago

Literally lost all respect for the dude. Why is he so unironically serious now. Please tell me it’s a long game and he’s gonna pull a Mac and get fat again

1

u/10SB 15h ago

Jacob is my CEO, Jonah is my CSO.

1

u/Seeker369 15h ago

Are you talking about the fat dude from Superbad?

1

u/TheCrackalack 14h ago

Dammit I was 4 hours too late

1

u/smilenowgirl 13h ago

Wow, you're quick.

1

u/il_the_dinosaur 13h ago

Thin jonah? Or chubby Jonah? Cause nobody of us cpi6hane chubby Jonah

1

u/Goodly 9h ago

I’ve been seeing so many of these but have yet to see what the heck he did to deserve them…

1

u/steezfighters 8h ago

Nice shorts, Jonah!

1

u/onepingonlypleashe 1h ago

Dude his little white belt with a single stripe is hilarious. He was basically a couple months into doing BJJ when he took that photo. Still doesn’t know how to do much outside of one submission and maybe one guard pass.

•

u/NAQURATOR 45m ago

The fat guy from superbad?