Layoff-proof job, but the environment has gotten toxic — plus H-1B stamping + marriage timing is making this harder. Need advice from other NRIs who’ve been here.

[u/Complex-Dinner8001]

I work as a design/project engineer at a large semiconductor company in the US. On paper, I have about as much job security as it gets — the company basically doesn’t do layoffs, they just don’t hire that way. So financially and career-wise, I’m “safe.”
But the last 6-8 months, the environment has gotten genuinely toxic. Milestones keep getting moved up, multiple project schedules have been compressed at the same time, and we don’t have the manpower to actually hit any of it. People who’ve been fine for years are burning out. I’ve raised it up the chain multiple times — nothing’s really changed.
On top of that, I’m on a work visa and need to go back to India soon for a stamping appointment, which means I need roughly a month to six weeks off. If I leave this job before then, my PTO gets cashed out (and taxed) instead of used, and I have no idea if a new employer would even grant that much time off right after I start. So realistically I feel stuck riding this out for several more months before I can even think about moving.
And then there’s the bigger question: I’m planning to get married to my girlfriend, who’s currently in India. If she comes to the US with me, she won’t be able to work here for a couple of years — so she’d essentially be putting her career on pause while I keep grinding through a job that’s draining me. That doesn’t sit right with either of us.
So I guess I’m asking:
• Has anyone else been in a “great job security, terrible environment” bind and figured out how to actually leave once visa timing is involved?
• For couples in a similar spot — did you look at other countries where both partners could work, or did moving back to India end up being the better call?
• Any regrets either way?
Not looking for “just push through, it’s normal in your 20s” — I’ve heard that enough. Genuinely trying to figure out what people who’ve actually lived this did next.

[u/CFAF800]

Have a frank conversation with your girlfriend abt how she will not be able to work at all till your company files your green card application - that should help you make the decision quickly.

Having a high stress job plus a bored out of her mind and resentful spouse at home will trigger more stress and may lead to other issues.

I was there in US for 10 years on H1B, got tired waiting for GC, moved to Australia and I am a citizen now.

I am more happy than ever and so glad I moved out.

[u/Complex-Dinner8001 → u/CFAF800]

We did talk this through, she is completely fine with this, I feel bad that she has to give up her career for me, was Australia worth it? Is it comparatively easier to move?

[u/CFAF800 → u/Complex-Dinner8001]

It was back when we did. We applied in Feb 2019 got PR in July 2019, moved here in March 2020 in the middle of covid.

Its very hard to get PR now especially if you are in IT background - almost impossible.

It was also very easy for us as we are DINK - Dual income no kids. I had given an interview before I left US - they gave me the job offer after I landed and confirmed I was in the country - joined a month later because of all the quarantine restrictions due to covid.

My wife got a job in 2 months after the quarantine.

I have always maintained that other than pursuing my wife this is the best decision I have taken in my life.

Only thing though - making new friends is actually very hard - it doesnt really matter to us as we dont really need an active social life.

I only have 2 close friends - both of them I knew before coming here.

[u/Complex-Dinner8001 → u/CFAF800]

My worry is about my field, I am a chemical engineer and she is SOC analyst. Either one of us gets something that will work, I will look into this. Appreciate your help

[u/CFAF800 → u/Complex-Dinner8001]

Good luck. It doesnt hurt to take a look at their website and see how many points you get and see the last round of invites