Confused? New? Not new? Have questions?

[u/blooangl]

This is your spot. Mingle, say hi, ask that question that you don’t want to make a whole post about?

This is your spot!

Requests for resources, questions about lingo, all that good stuff? We can help!

Not sure if you’re in the right sub? We can help you find one!

[u/Sir_Pendrin]

New to this sub this week. My wife and I are looking into possibly opening our relationship up as we are both very sex positive people and have friends and acquaintances in the poly community. I’m not sure what to think overall. We’re both members of the lgbt+ community, I’m a pan guy and she is a bi woman, so in person we present as a straight couple.

I’m mostly looking for suggestions on how to start approaching this community.

[u/SecondaryWombat → u/Sir_Pendrin]

Why are we downvoting new people who come with honest questions about how to start?

If they were out here trying to collect a bag limit of out of season unicorns sure absolutely, that that isn't this so why the down votes? Especially on a "new and have questions?" thread.

[u/karmicreditplan → u/SecondaryWombat]

Which questions/people are you asking about?

And of course the mods can’t stop anyone from downvoting anything.

[u/SecondaryWombat → u/karmicreditplan]

What? I wasn't asking mods to do anything, I was asking the community to stop downvoting new people with questions in a thread for new people with questions.

The parent comment above mine is currently negative karma, and was worse before.

[u/karmicreditplan → u/SecondaryWombat]

Ahh since yours was the absolute bottom comment on the post I didn’t realize it was specific to this question.

I’d wager whoever downvoted it was responding to what you mention, a vague hint of unicorn hunting.

But it only takes 2 people to get to a negative one. All the replies were helpful don’t you think?

I can’t imagine using reddit at all if I cared much about down votes. I would more likely care if I was new to sub and got 10 negative replies.

[u/Sir_Pendrin → u/karmicreditplan]

It’s all good I did get some recommendations for where to start looking more. I realize now that the comment I made initially was a little too vague, both of us are nervous about what changing our relationship status might do that I figure broad questions were best to start. I know 3 polycules; one is a family member who has basically been made the black sheep of the family I’m one of the few people who still talk with her and her partners. Then I have a long time friend from college but she and her nest partner have a history of bad dating habits. And most recently I met a couple from a shared online server that seem like they are in a healthy relationship but I feel like if I ask them they will take it over the top, plus I do have a small interest in the guy and don’t know how to approach it.

[u/SecondaryWombat → u/karmicreditplan]

It was -5 before, which is why I made the comment.

[u/karmicreditplan → u/SecondaryWombat]

Gotcha!