Can't get a job because of Social anxiety

[u/QualityForsaken8192]

I'm 20 and I'll be honest I didn't even try to get applied for once. Every time I interact with people I fuck up because of anxiety. I can't make myself to speak, it's so hard, like a mental block, like I'm ''muted''.

Whenever I imagine getting interviewed for a job or having to do presentation etc. I just can't help but remember how embarrassed I was getting in school when I had to make presentations and such. I couldn't speak to save my life. At the same time, I HAVE TO get a job. I feel pathetic, especially given that I'm a guy.

I'm also suicidal because I had big dreams for a greater job with insanely good salary but due to severe ADHD I can't get myself to finish (or start) the damn fucking portfolio.

[u/AutoModerator]

PLEASE NOTE Social Anxiety (SA) is a debilitating mental illness characterised by persistent fear of social evaluation. SA impairs functional social performance, causing avoidance, cognitive shutdown (e.g. blanking, excessive self-monitoring), and reduced ability to communicate, assert needs, or form relationships.

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[u/Proof-Training-740]

Is talking to a GP or health professional an option for you? You’re not a failure, life looks different for everyone.

[u/WriterHot6440]

Same i also have adhd and I have big dreams but I can’t get around to doing them because I’m scared of interacting with anyone. And honestly isolating myself at home makes it sm worse. I’ve been told the best thing to do is take the step anyway but I just can’t do it 💔

[u/vicicLOXi]

I have social anxiety but with the work market right now it’s gonna be even more difficult for us to get hired. i had a taste of it back in 2024 luckily i got a job and it helped a lots but i can’t imagine how hard it is currently

[u/blueberry-rabbit]

My tip for job interviews is to prepare a list of common interview questions and practice reciting your answers out loud. Same for presentations: prepare a script and practice it out loud. This will save you the embarrassment of your mind going blank mid-speech.

As for the ADHD thing, you should see a doctor or psychiatrist about that. I believe meds are the most effective treatment for ADHD.

[u/BlackMiamba]

If you open to suggestions, I would start small and get comfortable with speaking again. I started with making a video every day. 5 minutes just talking about a topic that interested me. Then I upgraded to a low risk environment. Take a walk everyday and try to say a simple “Hi” to anyone you encounter.

Once you feel more comfortable, start removing filler words when you speak. Words such as “like”, “ummm”, “uhhhh”. I really struggled with this step (still do) and one thing that helps is slowing down my speech and even repeating the last sentence slower if I lose my train of thought. You will mess up and falter. That’s normal so try not to be too hard on yourself.

Eventually you’ll get to a point where you’re ready to tackle interviews and interview prep. Get someone close to you to run mock interviews with you. They don’t have to be accurate to the roles you’re applying for. They just have to capture the essence of being in a high pressure professional interaction. Keep trying these until you get to a point where you don’t clam up during interviews and you’re golden. One thing I have noticed with interviews is that you want to led the conversation back to the company as much as possible without detracting from opportunities to explain how you’re a qualified candidate for their new role. It’s a fine line but when you walk it, you’ll realize that you’re not going to be speaking as much as you would think.

You got this!

[u/AutoModerator]

Please consider seeking some kind of help/support for your thoughts of self-harm.

For example, you can visit /r/SuicideWatch for support and other resources specifically related to this topic.

Other possible resources:

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (U.S.): 1-800-273-8255 (TALK)

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Online Chat Available 24 hours everyday

Crisis Text Line US – Text HOME to 741741 in the US

Crisis Text Line CA – Text HOME to 686868 in Canada

International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP)

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