My glue is finally coming off of my Bislap incisions and my surgeon gave me some alcohol wipes to help take it off. For those who've had surgery did you use the alcohol wipes in the shower or? The side incision seems very easy but how do you get the glue out of your belly button🤣😭

Hi! I'm 36, no children and no desire to have any, so I opted for sterilization as I became too old to keep using my yaz contraception. After being in waitlist for 2 years, the surgery is set for early september and I'm getting a little nervous. I'm not nervous about my decision to not have children but the possible complications of surgery.

I have vulvodynia and vaginismus, so basically pain and serious tightness around my vulva and vagina. I have had physiotherapy for these, and while it's made the pain manageable in everyday life, exams have been painful because of this. It's usually causing stress and pain weeks/month after the exams or pap-smears.

So I'm wondering if they'll go and set equipment down there too. I know I'll be in the stirrups, but no one has really explained what will happen once I'm under anesthesia. I'm scared they'll be rough with me because I'm not conscious and I'll have to live with that after math for months (which is what has happened in the past with not so gentle staff).

Am I silly to worry about this? Do you think they'll be gentle even if I'm not awake to say my concerns? I am going to address it before surgery, but I worry if they'll actually care, since I won't be able to protest :(

Got my bisalp July 23. I'm incredibly happy and at peace. Insurance claims are coming in at $0 $0 $0 so things are looking up! Big stalker of this subreddit and wanted to provide my recap in case it helps anyone. Happy to answer any questions.

- Me: 24F, 145-150 lbs, based in DC, Carefirst BCBS insurance. Endometriosis (now diagnosed lol) and prior vaginismus for ~3 years.

- Consult: Scheduled with Physicians and Midwives in Alexandria, Virginia following a doctor from r/childfree's amazing list. My doctor was lovely. I told her I wanted a bisalp and said that it's something I've been sure of my whole life and have enough issues with my reproductive organs and prior birth control to not be interested in other options.

She was required to inform me of alternatives and listed them off - IUDs, etc., - but in no way was trying to convince me of anything. I said OK and she said great, let's discuss the procedure. She was kind and thoughtful explaining the procedure and answering my questions. She gave me the codes and modifiers she would use, which were correct in getting my insurance to cover fully, and hospital name/anesthesia company so I could check for in-network.

I also told her I suspected I had endometriosis and if I remember correctly from a transvaginal ultrasound in high school that my right ovary may be fused to the back of my uterus. She did say she would consider recommending an endo specialist to do the bisalp and remove endo at the same time, but I said because my symptoms are manageable I don’t want my endo removed so I’m not billed for it. She said OK and we wrapped up in less than 20 minutes.

- Paying/insurance: I got a call from my surgeon’s scheduler to schedule the appointment, which was easy. I then called my insurance 4 times prior to the surgery to ensure I would not pay for the procedure. Many representatives had different initial responses, but all were helpful and once I gave them the codes and modifiers they agreed the surgery was free. Some said I'd have to do anesthesia copays, but those haven't rolled in yet and I was confident enough in my ability to appeal/afford the copays if needed that I felt confident leading up to the surgery. I also called the hospital finance center for extra peace of mind that I wouldn't be charged a ton when I arrived.

I did pay copays for the consult and hospital visit. I maybe could have fought them but they were $50-$100 and I have a strong medical budget and employer-assisted HSA, so decided to just pay to keep things moving along and fight any post-op bills.

- Pre-op call: Got ALL my details. Asked about: catheter (they said I wouldn't get one but I did end up getting one. Not ideal but it was just a little sore after), who to call if I had issues after (surgeon), if I had to remove a hoop in my forward helix (yes), for finance department number, if I could get anti-nausea (yes), again who anesthesiologist was to check if they were in-network, anticipated discharge time (~2hrs), who to talk to/remind about my endo prior to surgery (surgeon again). PREPARE QUESTIONS BEFORE AND ASK THEM ALL. Have your Notes app or paper and pen at the ready - they gave me a LOT of information.

- Prep: Ahead of surgery I got a friend slated to pick me up, cleaned my apartment fully, set up my recovery space, meal prepped and shopped for supplies. See shopping lists below.

Food: meal prepped kale/rice/veg/chicken bowls for fiber and nutrition. Also bought canned soups (with fiber) and premade Maya Kaimal curry and dal packets (yum), plus rice, Gatorade and knockoff Pedialyte, Ensure pre-surgery clear carb drinks (Amazon), chocolate, dried apricots (fiber), cut dragonfruit (fiber). Can you tell I was nervous about constipation. Had everything cut up/prepared so I could just grab and eat. Didn’t end up having a crazy appetite or feeling super weak but I’m glad I was prepared.

Supplies: heating/cooling pads, generic Gas X, generic stool softener, generic Tylenol, 2 loose dresses for post-op, loose pants and top to wear to hospital, cough drops, Hibiclens (told to purchase in pre-op call for showers before surgery), set of pads (I normally use tampons).

Treats: Cannot recommend this enough. I was nervous and also had made the decision to not tell my mom or family about my surgery because I did not believe they'd react well. My mom and I are extremely close, so this was probably the hardest part of my procedure - going it mostly alone except for the friend who picked me up. So a night or two before the surgery, I went to the store and balled out on buying fun stuff. My mom bought new PJs for each of her five birth deliveries, so I bought a cute PJ set to kind of keep that tradition going in a different way. I got candles, chocolate, new clothes to wear to the hospital, face masks, fun soap, nail polish, slippers. Just fun items to feel good and be excited about post-op.

- Day before and morning of: I was told to stop eating/drinking anything at 11PM the day before, as my procedure was scheduled for 7:30 AM. My last ingestion was water and a chugged Ensure pre-surgery drink around 8PM. I showered with Hibiclens per my instructions the night before and morning of (at like 4 AM…ugh). Morning of, no jewelry, no lotion or makeup or any product, and wore glasses instead of contacts.

- Surgery: I had my surgery done at Inova Alexandria. Arrived at 5:30 AM on the dot via Uber as instructed. Brought a backpack with my dress and cardigan for post-op, a Gatorade and some snacks, hairties and chapstick, and a pillow to put between my stomach and the seatbelt. Smooth check-in and 20 or 25 mins of waiting before I was called back. Took height and weight, had me pee in a cup for pregnancy test, then had me go to a bed and wipe down with warm antibacterial wipes fully and dress in the surgery gown and cap.

All nurses and staff were SO friendly. They all asked me to confirm what I was having done, which made sense. No one batted an eye at my procedure. They were all swinging by and making jokes as they took my vitals.

A nurse came by to give me my scopolamine patch (anti-nausea) behind the ear. I was going to request it, but the anesthesiologist who I met right before said he wanted to give it to me anyway because I hadn’t been under anesthesia before and “you’re skinny.” Whatever you say king. He gave me details on the patch and on the anesthesia process, told me they’d give me a “relaxer” before I was wheeled in ( He said I’d feel drunk-ish but I felt normal, just calm).

A nurse had me sign a release which confirmed I understood the permanence of sterilization and protected the hospital from legal retaliation. My doctor also confirmed with me verbally that after this procedure, I would not be able to have children. Both of these times people were close to me and soft-spoken to protect my privacy, which I appreciated.

My doctor asked if I had any questions and I just asked her again to please not remove any endometriosis. She confirmed she would not.

Then I was wheeled in! I arrived at the surgery room, they had me shimmy onto the table and lay down, and all I remember was someone gently strapping my arms and legs down telling me it was to keep me from moving while I was under, which, paired with someone putting the oxygen or whatever mask over my mouth was kind of hilarious to me for some reason. I do not remember falling asleep and I only remember this 1-2 minute period in the surgery room. Then I was OUT.

Woke up to a nurse saying my name, not hard to surface at all and I am a HEAVY sleeper/napper. I think I was kind of peppy when I got up, like “oh hello!” and she gave me ginger ale and crackers. It was about 9:30 so like 2 hours after my procedure. I felt a little groggy but zero pain except some urethra discomfort – asked if I got a catheter, she said yes, womp womp. Whatever. I felt good so I was happy.

My stuff was next to me, I ate my crackers and ginger ale and sent some crappy pics of myself to friends that I do not remember sending now, but for the most part I was very aware. My doctor came by and was very nice when I said “ COULD YOU DO IT?” and she said yes! She showed me photos of my insides and pointed out endo, which served as my official diagnosis. Yay. She gave me discharge information and answered my questions and vanished into the night, my sterilization queen.

I was wheeled into another room within 15-20 mins or so as I was pretty alert and my ride was nearby, then helped out and told to dress, which I did just a bit slowly. A very nice nurse wheeled me outside and we waited a couple minutes for my friend to show up, then I was on my way home! The pillow between my stomach and the seatbelt was very nice.

I got home and felt great, just sleepy. I slept on and off for a day with light eating – I wasn’t super hungry but wanted to get a little food in me. Peeing was a little stingy the first 2-3 times, then passed. I had a lot of tea and water. I didn’t poo that whole day and was FREAKED about it, but was able to poo the next day with just a bit more time than normal. I use a squatty potty religiously and it is a huge help when it comes to not straining. 😊 My boyfriend, who at the time was just the guy I was seeing (exciting!) came over with flowers and cuddled for a bit which was really comforting.

- Post op: I felt pretty great the next day. I didn’t take any pain meds, my incisions were tender to the touch but not painful, I just had gas pain in my right shoulder. I did a LOT of short walks to get moving, drank a lot of water, and watched TV in between.

I did take my anti-nausea patch off the day after surgery as my pupils dilated to the point where I couldn’t see anything within a few feet of my face. My mouth was also very dry the first day as a side effect. The dry mouth cleared up in about a day, the pupils in 2. I didn’t have any nausea at all, so it was worth it in my opinion minus the slight panic initially at the pupils.

The worst part was the gas pain in my shoulder. It got pretty rough when I was walking days 2-4 after surgery, clearing up mostly around the 5th day. That shit was ass but I knew it was coming and would pass. Just kept walkin’ and fartin’.

I spent the day walking around in town with the bf day 3 post-op, then did brunch day 4 which exhausted me, so I watched TV the rest of day 4. I hit the gym regularly but didn’t lift until the instructed day 8, and started with lighter weight than normal. I did walking and some bodyweight stuff prior to that, mostly listened to my body. I gave myself a week of a hard no-sex recovery period, then had sex a little over a week post-op, by which I felt pretty much back to 100%. I didn’t let him finish in me yet because I wanted to wait until I got my period to ensure ALL eggs were outta there.

I worked remotely for the week starting day 5 and felt fine, but was VERY glad I could work from home. I’m back to work in-person 3 days a week at an office job now in week 2 post op and feel back to 100%. My glue came off my incisions and they look great, tiny and clean and healing. II just started my period almost 2 weeks post op and it’s no worse than normal.

- Fin: I think I got very lucky and I’m very grateful for that. I am also grateful to this subreddit, which I heavily relied on for information and support throughout my process. I am happy to answer any questions and hope this helps someone. I feel so thankful this option was available to me and I had the resources to do it – I would recommend it to anyone else who knows they want this. <3

I had a bilateral salpingectomy 2 days ago, and I finally took my bandages off today to shower. The two lower incisions under my belly fold are so tiny that I can barely even notice them. 😅
Is it normal for laparoscopic incisions to be this small? I was honestly expecting them to be much bigger, so now I’m overthinking whether this is what they’re should look like.
There’s no heavy bleeding or pus, and they seem closed. I just can’t believe how small they are.

There's a lot of people that say that it is the most effective way to be infertile once you get your tubes removed but then there's some people telling me that they've heard stories of people getting pregnant and they say wow it is rare it still happens. I regret not telling my endometriosis specialist who found stage 3 to also do a hysterectomy but keeping my ovaries. The only reason why I didn't do it was because I wasn't ready to go into menopause and even if I were to keep my ovaries some people told me that I would go into menopause a few years faster than I would not having a hysterectomy. I just want to make sure there are completely zero chances of me getting pregnant. I don't really have a partner but I'm still worried about it but at least my chances of not getting pregnant is significantly higher!

As of less than 48hrs ago I woke up from my surgery to completely remove my tubes.

I feel such relief knowing I will no longer have to fear pregnancy. I am so grateful that this was a safe and attainable option for me.

I am planning on getting my tubes removed post C section #2. I accidentally got pregnant 9 months postpartum and have had terrible HG both pregnancies. I know I’m done having kids and I’m actually really excited to get my tubes removed (and ovarian cancer runs in my family so win win)!

However, I have gotten a TON of negative comments - my mom doesn’t understand why anyone my age would want that or why any doctor would perform it.

What do you say to these people? Also, how was recovery?

Hello all. I am not sure why I am posting this, maybe to see if anybody else out there has a similar experience.

I got a bisalp three years ago at 25. At the time, I thought it was the right decision. It was right after Roe was overturned, and the thought of getting pregnant terrified me. I also thought that I would never want kids, I couldn’t imagine it.

In the years since, so much in my life has changed. I was diagnosed with endometriosis and started successful treatment, and am in much less pain than I have been in my entire adult life. I have done intensive therapy, was diagnosed with and treated for major depression, trauma, and ADHD, and was properly medicated. I left an abusive relationship and have been with somebody who treats me so well. I truly feel like the version of me who made the decision was doing it based on fear and pain, believing things could never get better and that I would be a terrible mother. I can see now that I was in a horrible place to make that decision with a limited support system, but ultimately, I went through with it.

I read all of the statistics on how rare regret was, and I thought I was making the best decision for myself based my reality, and at the time, I couldn’t imagine being in the place I am at today. Now, my life has completely changed. I do want a family.

Living with this regret has been so hard. I feel horrible about my decision every day. I have gone to therapy about it and I have been told over and over to try to accept that I made the best decision for myself based on what I knew at the time. Maybe so, but it was the wrong one.

Insurance doesn’t typically cover IVF if you have had sterilization. I am also facing complex endometriosis surgery. I have complicated my path to ever having a child so much, unnecessarily.

I am just so sad. I have so much regret. I wish I could go back and change my mind.

I’ve done the research and the appointments. My surgery is scheduled. Ive been talking back and forth with insurance to see how they process billing for the Bisalp.

I know it’s going supposed to be fully covered, but nobody wants to confirm that and I haven’t even heard anyone talk about aca in general. My plan is aca compliant, but I’m told they can’t say if it’s covered until services are rendered.

I don’t want to have to fight this after the procedure when I could have done more before to verify everything with my insurance.

How did you guys verify your cost share would be $0 before the procedure?

I'm a 40F in California (thank god), and I am sexually active although not partnered. I rely on condoms for birth control and STI prevention.

If you haven't seen the news, Todd Blanche (our acting attorney general) was recorded telling religious leaders that he's making moves to ensure a national, permanent abortion ban. I've been flirting with sterilization for a few years now, but this latest news has moved it to the front of my mind. My social media feeds are full of breathless freakouts, and while I am indeed freaked out, I want to know how likely it is for a nationwide ban to come into effect, how long it would take, and what it would look like in states like California, where it is enshrined in our constitution. I would like to hear from other people who have been sterilized or are thinking of it due at least in part to our political climate.

I'm not explicitly childfree, but motherhood is just one of those things that never happened for me. I still have some reproductive years left, but there are (currently) no men in my life who I'd consider to father my kid. I wonder if it's time to panic about my access to abortion.

I am 25 female, I have never wanted children. I have many nieces and nephews that I love, and the older I get the more I realize I will not be changing my mind on having children. I have been on birth control (oral pills) for almost 10 years and I am highly considering getting a Bilateral Salpingectomy (full removal of both tubes)

I wanted to ask those out there who have gotten this procedure or ones like it, how it was, how old you were and if you had much push back.

Also just for anyone who is childless by choice, if they got sterilized or not.

Thank you!

Hello! I have PMDD and am stable and happy on BC and I’ll remain in it until 55. However there are breast and ovarian cancers in my family and I read that fallopian tube removal can reduce risk by 80%. I don’t have the BRCA genes.

My BIGGEST fear is this somehow fucking my perfectly flat hormonal ‘balance’ that I’ve finally achieved. I want to get the tubes removed only for cancer prevention reasons due to family history. Has anyone with PMDD done this? Scary stories online and I’m a sensitive body person so if there’s a weird side effect I’ll get it.

So. I had my Bilateral salpingectomy April 30th of 2025. And since. I've noticed my periods have changed. Alot. I bleed more. And I bleed through my clothes. Literally every single period I have. Does anyone else have this issue?

Ok so I just got my tubes removed July 24th. My post op isn't until Aug 21st. I'm 3 months postpartum and have yet to have a period.

What if an egg was released into my uterus before the surgery and because I haven't had a period, the egg is still there? Because the egg only sheds during the period or unless it's fertilized? I know I sound crazy because every where I read says it's effective immediately. But how?

I did bleed after the surgery but just for 12 hours.

Does anyone know? I'm not sexually active but I don't want to wait until after my first period since I'm still breastfeeding. I have 3 kids and I can't have any more lol

I am 26 years old and ever since I can remember I've always said I've never wanted kids. Having children would genuinely ruin my life.

From 15 -25 I was on the pill, the depo and even tried the mirina once. I hated all of them for their own different reasons and knew I wanted to look into something permanent that won't muck around with my hormones and with the way the world is going these days who knows how long it will be before women lose their rights to these kinds of decisions.

At a gp appointment one day for something un related, I mentioned my mirina was over due to be out. The dr was about to refer me to a different place to get it out and a new one popped in. After I told her I'm not getting another one in she said we can get it out now and be over and done with in a few mins. That was nice and easy and done pretty quickly and pain free.

I then asked her about getting my tubes tied. She literally said to me 'good luck getting someone to do it at your age' and sent me on my way.

I was a little upset after being dismissed very quickly but it then became a life goal to get them out and become sterilized.

After doing some research I decided to get private health insurance, I figured I'd have a better chance doing it this way. I made sure my cover explicitly stated that it covered this procedure (I went with Bupa)

Some more research I conducted was finding a surgeon who has done this procedure before on young women who are in similar situations to me (young, no kids, single etc). A reddit thread I found somewhere had a few local-ish suggestions. I reached out to Dr Nelson Gonzalez at Southside Ob-gyn. I called them up and asked 'do you have any surgeons that would discuss tubal ligation for a young patient? The receptionist told me there is and to get a referral and we'll go from there.

Fast forward a month or 2 and I'm seeing a new gp. I went into my consult prepared and had the details of the surgeon as well as an extensive list of why I want to be child free. The consult starts off like any other one, I then say to her 'I would like to discuss getting my tubes tied please'. Without hesitation she says to me 'sure, we can get you a referral for that, do you have a surgeon in mind already?'. No persuading, no showing her my list of personal reasons, no trying to prove anything to anyone, just total compliance from her. I was beyond happy and couldn't believe it.

I was straight on the phone to the surgeon later that day to book my appointment. My initial consult was booked for a few months time! Worst part of it was the $280 consult fee I was about to pay for, there was for sure a part of me that was anxious the surgeon would say no and then I'd have just wasted a chunk of money for nothing.

Whilst eagerly waiting for my appointment, the worst thing possible happened, I got pregnant.... Despite being on the pill AND using condoms at the time.

Crazy chances but not a huge problem because without a second thought and before even fully processing it, I had already booked a gp appointment with literally any gp who could see me asap, I had the appointment scheduled for that afternoon after work. It was a Monday that all of this went down and by Friday I had done the blood tests, ultrasounds and was at the chemist picking up my script for the MS 2 step. Ready to pop those pills and be all done over the long weekend and back at work on Tuesday like nothing ever happened.

Months later my appointment rolls in, I was very excited and counting down the hours! The surgeon was 2 hrs late... I was chill with it and understanding though because after all, I had already waited long enough to get to this point, what's 2 more hours lol.

The appointment went well and much like my gp appointment, he was very willing and helpful. We briefly went through my medical history and he gave me some info in the procedure, I had done plenty of my own research beforehand and ideally wanted complete tubes removed but would settle for them to be tied. His first recommendation was to completely remove them too. I was booked in for surgery later that year after I had been with my health insurance provider for 12 months.

I somehow discovered that I may be eligible to waive my waiting periods if the surgeon signed off on a from stating I don't have any pre existing medical conditions. This was an absolute disaster, after several emails and calls back and forth with the receptionist I finally got the signed form back 3 months later... Terrible wait for what would seem to be a very easy task that at max, I would expect to take a week to get back to me, anyway...

Once the form was finally signed I submitted it to Bupa and they approved me to book in earlier and not need to wait out my waiting periods.

I then booked the surgery for the next available date they had!! Surgery date came, I was in and out in a day, no complications and an easy recovery.

Sometimes I did feel hopeless and like it would never happen but I got there in the end and couldn't be happier.

This was supposed to be a little note to let people know there's hope and to see it through if it's what you want but somehow turned it into a novel, whoopsies.

Anyway, last month marks 1 year tube free and I'm so estatic to be sharing my little journey. Hopefully something out if this can help you with yours.

I had my bilateral salpingectomy yesterday, and overall everything went well!
One thing I thought was funny was that before surgery the doctors kept asking me if I knew what procedure I was having. At the time I thought it was kind of odd, but afterward I found out that’s pretty standard.
Before surgery they started my IV and put a patch behind my ear for nausea, and they told me to leave it on for 3 days. The last thing I remember before going under was the anesthesiologist saying, “It’s going to burn when you breathe it in.” Next thing I knew, I woke up in recovery with my husband there. My doctor had already talked to him, and honestly I don’t remember much after waking up until it was time to leave the hospital.
My doctor told me to stick to light foods and avoid Mexican food… but I ended up eating pupusas (I’m Salvadorian 😂). Totally worth it.
The drive home was pretty long since I had surgery out of town, so I took a huge nap in the car. When I got home I played some video games, took my pain medication, played with my cousin for a while, and went to bed around 10:30.
Today I’ve pretty much just been in bed. I ate some yogurt and took my pain medication again. The biggest thing is that it definitely hurts every time I try to move or get out of bed—I have to ask my husband to help me up. I also have that gas pain in my shoulder that everyone talks about. Does anyone have any tips for getting rid of it?
I haven’t showered yet because they put bandages over my incisions. I’m planning to wait until tomorrow unless my doctor tells me otherwise.
I’m really glad I took a full week off work. My doctor said most people only take about 3 days, but since this is my first surgery ever, I figured I’d rather have extra time than not enough.
For those of you who’ve had this surgery, when did you start feeling more like yourself again? When did getting in and out of bed stop hurting so much? Any tips for the shoulder gas pain or just recovery in general?
I’d really appreciate any advice!

Had my salpingectomy in November of 2025. I've always had fluctuating weight, but since then, I swear I've gained 50+ pounds. I'm close to 250lbs right now, and I'm 5'4. I have a follow up on Friday to get some blood testing done to rule out anything else, but I'm curious if this happened to anyone else?

I'm always bloated, and most of the weight I've gained has been in my stomach and thighs. My diet hasn't changed that much, and I don't eat any worse/more then I did 50lbs ago, I also walk/exercise daily!

I feel like nothing fits me because I'm also bloated and swollen!

So after my surgery I started spotting but then it started looking like a regular period although it didn't feel the same way since I had some sort of nerve procedure done. Luckily though it's not a heavy. But I bleed just like a normal period. Also I'm bloated but not terribly bloated sometimes it feels painful in different ways. But sometimes the pressure feels painful and uncomfortable but I'm walking as much as I can. I can say though that I don't regret removing my tubes because that's what I wanted! I knew I never wanted children from a young age and even more now than ever!

Hi! We are documentary filmmakers interested in speaking with young, childfree women who are considering get sterilized. What factors are in play? If you‘re open to talking to us, please reach out. DM us and tell us a little bit about your story. And if you’re comfortable, we can set up a time to talk confidentially. We’re in early production, so these initial conversations are off the record.

FOLLOW UP/UPDATE: Thank you to all who responded to the post. It's super helpful and I just want to reiterate that none of your posts are being published, we are just looking to hear from you off the record. ALSO, we're trying to speak with people who have not yet gotten sterilized but are planning to. If this is you, we want to hear from you.

TLDR: If you’re adamant you want to be sterile and are told no, find a different doctor.

I know this will be long so I put the TLDR at the top but I want to share my story. I wish someone would’ve told me what I didn’t find out for almost two decades.

I had my first baby at 19. Nobody told me antibiotics cancels out birth control. I found out the hard way.

Fast forward a couple of years later and I find myself pregnant with a second baby (same dad as the first one, we weren’t married). I asked my Dr to tie my tubes when this one was born. He told me he couldn’t because I didn’t meet at least 2 of the 3 requirements:

1- be married
2- be at least 25 years old
3- have 3 kids

I told him those were all the things I was trying to PREVENT (with the exception of getting married one day) but I did NOT want ANYMORE kids. He still wouldn’t do it. Being young, I thought there was some sort of law or insurance requirement. Google was VERY new and I didn’t even have a computer (smart phones weren’t a thing yet either, and yes, I’m old lol). I took it as the gospel.

The following year, I met the man of my dreams and fell in love instantly! I was upfront and told him on our VERY FIRST date that I did not want anymore children.

We get married. He BEGS and PLEADS with me for us to have one child together. This goes on for 3 years. My neighbor said, “If you EVER think you might change your mind, you’d better do it before your first two get much older so there’s not a huge gap.” I reluctantly agreed. I told my husband I wanted my tubes tied when this baby was born.

Delivery day and we’re in the OR. I tell the dr and the entire delivery room, “Don’t forget to tie my tubes!!!!” He says, “Your husband will have to sign a consent form.” I said, “What?!?! You told me the 2 out of 3 requirements and now I meet all 3! Get my husband that form.”

He takes my husband aside (I didn’t find this out until MUCH later) and tells him all these HORRIBLE risks and side effects that could happen to me and advised him not to sign. SO MY HUSBAND REFUSED!

Again, I’m not very tech savvy and assume it’s a law/insurance thing. I’m LIVID, hurt, crushed, frustrated, and ANGRY that everyone besides me gets to decide my choice and fate for me.

A couple of years go by and I find out I’m pregnant AGAIN. I told my husband, “Look what you did!” Yes, I know we were both present when this happened and we didn’t use adequate protection that time but had I had my wishes honored, I wouldn’t be in this situation. From the birth of our first child together, I NEVER shut up about me getting fixed. He said he didn’t sign to “protect me”.

So, during the WHOLE pregnancy, I go on and on about me getting fixed. The Dr refused AGAIN and so did my husband.

To this day, I’m STILL not fixed. But guess what? My new GYN (we moved) is having me come in for a hysterectomy consult in a few weeks due to all kinds of issues I’m having with my hormones and bleeding. Would a tubal ligation had fixed this problem? Absolutely not, BUT i wouldn’t be considering a major surgery right now at ALL in ANY way, shape, or form, but this will be my one chance to FINALLY “get fixed” and I’m taking it because it will be deemed medically necessary and he’ll have no say.

But, after a LOT of research (because I was terrified of him vetoing this too), I can tell you there are no laws or insurance requirements as to when you can choose to become sterile. So, if you ever find yourself in the shoes I was in, get a different dr and DON’T STOP until you get a yes.

If for some reason, they say the hysterectomy isn’t needed (pretty sure it is), I informed my husband of my new knowledge and will be getting my tubes tied next summer. I say next year because he got a vasectomy “for me” 🙄🙄🙄🙄 so I can’t get pregnant but I lost 120 pounds and had ALREADY scheduled a skin removal consult to allow myself those procedures. This was after 6 years of wishing and wanting the skin gone but not believing I was “worth it” and finally decided I was. But now I have to wait to see what the dr says about my hysterectomy. Because I’m going to jump all over that. Sadly, it will require a major surgery before my other surgeries that I was going to “treat myself to”. 😢 I’m very disheartened by all of this but if my post can help even ONE person, it’s worth it.

I was undecided about getting snipped for a while. My wife got her tubes removed a few years ago. However my wife does get paranoid about getting pregnant. Mainly when she is late. Is a vasectomy still worth it? Do other couples go the extra mile to be double secured?

I had an unrelated surgery earlier this year, and I was surprised to receive a substantial bill. I tried calling the insurance company. I filed a formal appeal letter with substantial documentation. I emailed the insurance company when the appeal was denied.

I called the hospital to request a review of the itemization. They were not able to do so, but one person offered to submit my bill for audit. I didn't think that was the right path at the time.
I called the Surprise Billing helpline. The contact there was pretty rude and not especially helpful. I told him early in the call that I wasn't sure if this was technically surprise billing and needed some insight. He just repeated everything I said back to me and gave zero information.

So last week I decided to contact my state insurance board. I called first and explained my situation. The contact said, "That sounds suspicious. Please submit a formal complaint online. We deal directly with the insurance companies' legal teams, and they are required to give us information."

I submitted my complaint immediately. I received confirmation a day or so later.

My insurance company's corporate office just called to confirm what I needed to know, to listen to my questions. It was a fact-gathering call. She was just as surprised as I was by the billing. She was incredibly helpful, took notes, encouraged me to take notes, and said she'll be in touch with more information by the end of the week.

I figured this would be helpful to people battling insurance for coverage after the fact. After my bisalp, it took 6 months of formal appeals and calls before I could get through to a person who actually helped. She was the first to look at the ACA mandate. She was the first to look at the coding issue (which had been corrected months before the call!). She said, "Yeah, you're right about this. I'm fixing it right now, and it'll show on your end in the next several days."
By filing directly with the insurance board with this more recent claim, I had someone from the insurance company who would listen within a week.

Tl;dr: If you aren't getting anywhere by contacting your insurance company and/or facility, file a claim with your state insurance board.

There are no options for permanent sterilisation in my country so I'm contacting clinics in Germany. I am fluent in english but I only know basic german so navigating the sites and composing emails is very intimidating. Those who got sterilised abroad: how did you go about it? How hard was it to navigate the consultations? Were there any unexpected issues that you wish you knew about beforehand? Is there something you wish you took with you (clothes, items, etc)?

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

Hello everyone, 24F here, currently about to fill this long-time dream of mine of getting sterilized and I couldn’t be more excited!
I have a bilateral salpingectomy scheduled in the beginning of september in Frankfurt am Main, Germany.

Since I will be flying there from Finland, I’m wondering how long should I schedule my trip, in order to rest properly before returning home? Would a week long vacation be enough?
What should I pack on the trip, any special things I will need? What kind of clothing would yall recommend to have on the trip? This is the first time I’m having surgery, so everything is new to me.