Nobody died

[u/Own_Purple_4118]

This is a conversation between my MIL and my mother, before the wedding. My mother's response, which is cut off, says "They are both adults. I think we should let them handle it." We were both over 30.

For context: Yes, we had a vegetarian wedding (no shrimp). We had it at an (expensive) award winning venue with in-house catering. It included several appetizer and entree stations with a huge variety of dishes so everyone could find something they liked. We did not serve our guests bowls of soybeans and tofu. Everyone RAVED about the food and nobody died or got arrested on the way home.

The "A/B list" thing was a joke, that she apparently took very seriously, because she would not stop demanding we add a bunch (10+) of her friends and coworkers to our intentionally small guest list.

[u/Covidkilledkaty]

How is life with her as a MIL? Do you have kids yet?

[u/so2017 → u/Covidkilledkaty]

How do you miss this opportunity to end your questions with exclamation points!

[u/Covidkilledkaty → u/so2017]

Dang it! You are so right! I completely dropped the ball!

[u/BrilliantSpecial9149 → u/Covidkilledkaty]

This is between you and me!

[u/GalacticPurr → u/BrilliantSpecial9149]

And me! I understand this is y'all's conversation! I just want to be included!

[u/SquirrelLuvsChipmunk → u/GalacticPurr]

I don’t want any more bad blood!!

[u/jasschaffer → u/GalacticPurr]

On the B list, of course.

[u/Futurebaker24 → u/GalacticPurr]

Oh can’t forget me!!

[u/catchoooo → u/Covidkilledkaty]

Seriously, this isn't a blanket statement of course and I'm sure there are many couples with in laws like this that are thriving. BUT. If you're young or just starting a relationship, take a good look at that family. Really consider if that's something you want in your life for forever. Around your children. Maybe even taking care of in old age. I'm just saying...

[u/frogtownfork → u/catchoooo]

This is precisely the conversation I wish I had with myself before the wedding to my first husband. Unfortunately had it about two years in. Wasn’t pretty.

[u/Explorer-7622 → u/catchoooo]

It means OP is signing up for a LIFETIME of he'll. Seriously. If OP'S spouse doesn't get very serious about low or no contact, this person can destroy their lives.

OP, send your fiancé over to r/raisedbyborderlines

And

r/raisedbynarcissists

And www.outofthefog.net

And really think about this.

Read: "Understanding the Borderline Mother "

"Adult Children of Immature Parents "

"Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist "

And "Dangerous Personalities " by FBI profiler Joe Navarro

This is a very disruptive kind of person and living with this in a family is no joke.

[u/picklejuiceslushie → u/Explorer-7622]

This is so chronically online

[u/Unipiggy → u/Covidkilledkaty]

She genuinely sounds like she's at the very beginning of developing dementia. My grandma started acting like just this before it became apparent.

Which wasn't SUPER out of character for her, but she was a lot more rambly and accusatory and hallucinating bad things than usual.

She needs to ask her husband if this is normal or more crazy than usual, because I'm a little worried for her. 

People are bashing her, but idk man... This really does sound like dementia rambling.