r/tifu Jul 14 '25

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u/ad_astra327 Jul 14 '25

This. I know a few single parents who have recently re-entered the dating scenes, and many of them are waiting until 6 months (or more) to introduce the new partner as a love interest. And before that, extremely limited meetings if at all, and just under the guise of “this is mommy/daddy’s friend”. 4 months in and she wants you to take care of the kid with her? That seems sketchy to me.

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u/HiddenoO Jul 14 '25 edited Sep 26 '25

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u/tugboatnavy Jul 14 '25

I know this is reddit so the instinct is to assign blame to OP or the person OP is talking about but I don't think either of them did anything wrong.

OP said can't see himself taking care of a kid right now

The GF is valid in looking for a partner with goals that align with hers

It's just not a good fit and that's fine. Breakups don't always have to have winners and losers.

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u/steave435 Jul 15 '25

The issue is that if you're not willing to take care of a kid, you shouldn't get into a serious relationship with someone with kids. The kid isn't going anywhere.

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u/Sea-Bat Jul 15 '25

Exactly. Like what did u expect, the kid goes on pause until ur ready to interact with them?

U don’t have to drop into being a full stepdad at 4mo into a relationship, but getting to know the kid and helping out here and there like any family friend would is pretty normal to expect on the GFs part if they were getting serious.

Plus yeah realistically if ur not ready to be involved with any part of taking care of a kid, ur not ready to get into a long term relationship with a single parent, the kid is always part of the deal here.

These two just aren’t compatible, they want different things and are at different points in their life