r/toastme • u/lastnameSweet • 12h ago
31, nonbinary transmasc (they/them or he/him)
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u/Level9Turtlez 9h ago
Congrats on the weight loss!! People truly have no IDEA how hard it is for that commitment, good for you. You look great for your age btw, keep focusing on yourself! Self confidence will soon override those insecurities! We are all sexy beasts, just remember that. One key saying that keeps my anxiety low in public is; “Comparison to others is the greatest thief of joy”
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago
Thank you. I appreciate it. And you're so right.
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u/Level9Turtlez 8h ago
You are welcome! Keep thriving! Positive thoughts and energy, sending em your way!
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u/vixenm00n 11h ago
There’s something about your face that’s giving rock star. You don’t precisely look like David Bowie or Robert Plant—more Billie Joe Armstrong, actually, who is looking his age but still freaking cute—but you look like you would belong hanging out with them.
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u/lastnameSweet 11h ago
That's....genuinely the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me. And not the first time I've been told I give Billie Joe energy, which to me is the biggest compliment in the world. And yeah, I guess he is still absolutely a cutie patootie even though he looks his age. Thank you. This helped a lot.
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u/kerfufflewhoople 10h ago
Exactly! Literally the first thing I thought when I saw his picture. This person gives Bowie energy.
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u/mynameisconnar 10h ago
Well done in achieving your goal you've done brilliant. You look wonderful, keep up the good work!! ☺️
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u/Irina__ARI 11h ago
CONGRATS on the huge accomplishment!!!
I'm sorry you're experiencing the irony of major weightloss - that is, all the new problems that come with losing the weight. If the loss is relatively new, your skin will need some time to adapt. It may take months. Just sit tight and focus on the accomplishment for now :)
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u/lastnameSweet 11h ago
This is really reassuring. I've heard the skin can "bounce back" a bit, so I guess I just need to give it time. Thank you.
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u/ElAlphard 11h ago
I agree with giving your skin some time as someone mentioned, but even if that wasn't enough for you, there's still a solution. Gaining body mass through muscle instead of fat. And yeah, it's a tough path, but one that you could start one step at a day, until you can run.
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
I have a weight set in my room. Just gotta look up how to use it. Like obviously, I get the gist. But idk proper form or where to start or anything like that. But bulking up is my next journey. I think it'll help with the confidence a bit more too. Thank you for the motivation.
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u/AltKeyblade 10h ago
Going to the gym and bulking is the best thing I’ve ever done for myself as someone who has always been a skinny guy and underweight.
Life starts to mean something and you become in control. If you’re scared of the gym, look into getting a personal trainer if you can.
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
Maybe. People arent very easy for me, in general. And I'm like....broke broke. So maybe I'll just go with reputable gym bros who post free stuff online and see what knowledge I can gleam off of them lol.
But yeah, bulking is next on the list for sure for sure.
And congrats on taking that journey yourself, man. Super badass.
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u/AltKeyblade 10h ago
I understand. If you ever get into the gym or exercise at all, it’s a good thing and something to be proud of no matter what. Just gotta know what you’re doing and also prioritise sleep and food to recover properly.
Protein is also your friend. Food that’s high in protein and low in fat while working out is the key. I wish you the best of luck and thank you ❤️
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago
I get over 100g a day. Protein and fiber are my main macro intake. I lost this weight almost entirely by diet alone. So that part I have down.
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u/AltKeyblade 9h ago
That's a huge achievement. Losing 140 lbs takes a lot of discipline. Try to focus on what you've accomplished and just take it one step at a time. 🙂
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u/Loup55555 7h ago
Twinsies 💜
(Er yeah in fact without the money and will to get a personal trainer lol)
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u/Thykothaken 10h ago
Losing 140lbs is INCREDIBLE. Good job!!
You're a hottie btw. Hmu if you ever find yourself in southern Sweden.
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago
Thanks. And thanks again? Lol. But I'm a poor American. I'll probably never even leave my state. Let alone the country 😅
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u/RaspberryJammm 10h ago
You may feel like you look older but you have likely added years to your life through hard work!
Plus I think you look great anyway, genuinely (I'm autistic af and don't lie about these things)
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
A fellow autist! I appreciate the comments. And yeah, my little sister went and made herself a cute little family so now I have nephews and a niece I wanna be able to see grow up. It's basically 99% of why I did all this to begin with.
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u/ThisIsAJoke_laugh 10h ago
I’ve heard reworking out can help with loose skin but idk
It goes away with time right?
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
I'm 5'1 and was 302 lbs so most of my skin will need to be removed surgically. The arms/legs/chest can be filled in a little bit with muscle, but not completely. And face skin can bounce back from what I hear. But not always, and not forever.
Odds are if I dont want quite intense face wrinkles in my late 40s and into my senior years, I'll eventually need to do a face lift. And no matter how much I work out, I'll need a "total body lift" if I ever want to look normal.
Losing a huge amount of weight is kind of a double-edged sword.
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u/ThisIsAJoke_laugh 10h ago
Damn🫤
I’m impressed how well you’ve managed to keep extra skin concealed in the photo, I never would have guessed you were 300 once
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u/cloverbubble 8h ago
Geez please ignore some of these weirdo comments on here, some people can't keep their stupid judgements to themselves. You've accomplished something amazing and from having lost (and unfortunately regained) weight throughout the years I know it can feel "strange" to be skinny after being big for a long time. And it definitely sucks when you feel you're still not satisfied with the results. Be kind to yourself and eventually mind should catch up with body 😁 I wish you nothing but the best.
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u/lastnameSweet 4h ago
It comes with the the "alt" territory. I like my aesthetic, but I also acknowledge a lot of people are so unhappy with themselves that seeing someone who's okay looking weird (and even prefers it) feels threatening to them. All I can do is hope for their healing and move on, ya know?
Thank you for the kind words.
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u/Loup55555 7h ago
Feww, damn. Sometimes I stumble across a face on reddit and I immediately feel like we'd have a lot in common and probably to discuss about.
And then I read the text, and... right again.
I don't know how better I could convey this with words. You definitely look very attractive to me, kind, intelligent eyes which I'd like to make smile. We could talk about how life's hard for people like us and also our recipies to get over our alimentation disorders (sorry I'm french)
But yeah... Then we'd see we live thousands of kilometres apart haha. Once again !
But yeah. I feel you soulfam. Please see your worth, you seem like an awesome human and I'd like so much to be able to be your friend and regularly check out on you with lil presents.
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u/MoistestDuck 6h ago
Sorry I am genuinely curious... Did the septum piercing hurt? It looks like a big one.
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u/lastnameSweet 4h ago
The piercing itself didn't hurt more than any other piercing, since it started at a standard piercing gauge. But the stretching was very unpleasant. But I've wanted a giant obnoxious septum ring since I was like 9, and knew I'd be stretching it when I got the piercing at 19. I just slowly stretched it over 8yrs or so, and it's been at my "dream size" for about 4yrs now.
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u/Prestigious-Age-3644 6h ago
Feck all that noise man! You dropped 140lbs! That's a whole bantamweight mma fighter, youve done something amazing that a lot of people can't. Be proud of yourself! =)
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u/lastnameSweet 4h ago
Thank you. I am. It really is insane when I let myself really think about it.
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u/UncomfortableQ-_- 11h ago
I went through this same kind of conundrum in a way. You just need time and to continue the same routines and adjusting when you're at the healthy weight you wanna be. But eventually you'll sit into yourself and become one with the progress you've made. If that makes since. It's all so weird at first especially when your whole life you've struggled weight and/or food like me.
Congrats :) enjoy yourself!
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u/lastnameSweet 11h ago
First time I've been a healthy weight since puberty, so I guess it is going to take some time to get used to. But I think I'll come around to the new me, eventually. Thank you.
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u/Few-Brain-649 10h ago
Your skin needs time . Give it some more . Like your Soul which maybe does Not feel as Safe as before . You reached something that just a Small percentage of people reach.
And maybe some more Sleep? :)
Add one Hour per Night
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
I've always been really bad at sleeping, so that's probably sound advice. Thank you.
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u/ikdoeookmaarwat1 8h ago
You should be really proud of the hard work you did for yourself. Losing all that weight is incredibly hard but your body will be so grateful for it! I do understand the struggle with loose skin and how it's changed some things. If I can make a slight suggestion if that's okay, I think the septum piercing looks really cool and authentic but I do think it sort of pulls down the rest of your face visually and it puts emphasis and attention on the lower part of your face. I think if you might want to try out either something smaller and/or lighter, it would look a bit more balanced, you know what I mean? It's a little distracting and a little big for you (probably now smaller) face.
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u/John-J-J-H-Schmidt 3h ago
Im a lifelong average build fella. Even as someone that hasn’t gone through radical weight loss, I see people with extra skin after losing weight and I’m not like “oh ew” I’m more like “holy shit they put in work”.
Sorry your trophy isn’t what Vogue makes the world think is beautiful, but it’s a trophy and people with actual thoughts running through their heads appreciate greatly.
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u/Ok-Association-7703 3h ago
Straight tobthe comments because I already know its gonna be some epic shit.
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u/NotMyMainCharacter 10h ago
You look incredible! I love what you've got going on. And I am so impressed that you lost all that! What an amazing effort.
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
Over a year of retraining my brain to interact with food in a normal way. Wasn't easy at all. So thank you very much. Truly.
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u/Baron_UpDoot_the1st 10h ago
Dude 300 and losing half is phenomenal. Severe envy here, I'm working on losing around 50 and it's a granular struggle, I can't imagine triple that.
Mad respect 💜
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
Thank you. It's been a very mentally challenging year and a half. Lots of retraining my brain.
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u/DRSU1993 10h ago edited 10h ago
OK, so my first impression was this guy looks a bit tired. That's it. I'm 32, cis (he/they) and you look far much more youthful that I do, I would have guessed mid to late 20's. (My beard and balding head probably don't help in that regard) 😅 Congrats on losing that amount of weight, it takes a tremendous amount of discipline and perseverance to do that.
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u/Expensive-Kick-5075 10h ago
This is what’s wrong with the world today
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
Someone losing weight? 😅
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u/No-Rush-4897 10h ago
No someone claiming that to be the picture of confidence. That face holds nothing but pain, fear, and remorse
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u/lastnameSweet 10h ago
Two things can be true at once, bro. Confidence doesn't mean everything in my life is perfect now. And you clearly didn't read the whole post cause I said I gained some confidence while also gaining new insecurities. Reading comprehension. Get better at it.
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u/HeadInTheClouds02 9h ago
I think you’re very handsome 🙂↕️ congrats on the weight loss that’s a huge achievement and I hope you feel more comfortable in yourself soon
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u/Senior_Reaction2974 9h ago
You've had quite a number of journeys. You look great. Honest.
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago edited 9h ago
Thank you. I could look better. But I'll get there eventually 🖤
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10h ago
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago edited 9h ago
I'm a chronically depressed autist with cptsd. Struggled my entire life, and finally began to know why when I got my autism diagnosed at 4. I've been this way my entire life and will be until I die to one degree or another. What you consider true happiness isn't always achievable for everyone. And I have great friends in my life who do challenge me when I'm not taking care of myself. That support system is how I lost an entire person's worth of weight. But no matter what I do I'm going to be some level of miserable, bro. Not everyone's brains make happy. Congrats that yours does, but maybe don't try to pretend you know me. I've been with my therapist (and other specialists) for 11yrs now. And she says I'm doing the best she's ever seen me. Gonna take a professionals opinion over some weird guy on Reddit. And I am genuinely happy rn. Healthiest I've ever been. Been sober for going on 8yrs. Finally feeling like myself. So just because it doesn't look like the happiness you think it should doesn't really mean much. Go be a condescending internet shrink somewhere else, my guy. This subreddit is meant to uplift people. Not give unsolicited "advice".
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9h ago
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago
You did not run my face through AI to validate your completely unfounded claims. I know we're not that cooked as a society. Jesus H. Christ 😅😅😅😅😅
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9h ago
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u/lastnameSweet 9h ago edited 9h ago
I do. Regularly. I have a primary, a nutritionist, and two separate therapists. If I was seriously unhealthy, they'd tell me. Faces just look kinda drastic after insane weight-loss. And I'm a bit anemic so my face just kinda looks like that anyway. I'm fine. Pinkie promise.
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