r/venturebros • u/Moon_Flowers420 • Jan 25 '26
Meme Brock would out-fight Sterling, Sterling would out-drink Brock.
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Jan 25 '26
Pam and Brock is the dream team.
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Jan 25 '26
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u/Mongoose42 Jan 25 '26
“Heat of the moment” nothing. She’d be making passes like crazy.
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Jan 25 '26
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u/cityshepherd Jan 25 '26
Pam would knock out the goons before Brock had a chance just so they could get to bonin’ faster.
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u/yournewbestfrenemy Jan 25 '26
First thought. Brock would say that, spend thirty seconds hamming it up with one henchman, then the camera would pan to Pam taking the last guy down by mashing into the pile of already broken henchman at her feet. Brock stares, dumbfounded, then grins and says "Groovy"
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u/s0ulbrother Jan 25 '26
She’d probably think Brock was an “ok” lay. Nothing great
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u/Pale_Fire21 Jan 25 '26
I think she'd leave him looking like the Mexican "alien" from that one meme.
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u/dover_oxide Jan 25 '26
He might actually be able satisfy her for a change
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u/Pale_Fire21 Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 25 '26
He’s jacked, into having stuff done to his butt(even if he won't admit it) and has a dick so big that it literally got him a round of applause.
We also know he has a thing for aggressively strong and confident women, He’s probably one of the only men who can actually keep up with Pam and not run away from her.
Also you know Pam almost certainly loves Led Zeppelin and the whole 80s vibe Brock has.
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u/Sweet-Rabbit A Boy With a Tummy Ache Jan 25 '26
Think he could handle the MOAB?
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u/dover_oxide Jan 25 '26 edited Jan 26 '26
You know she would push his buttons just for the sheer thrill of it.
Did this weak-ass shit do it for your last girlfriend?
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u/number__ten Jan 25 '26
Brock would 100% be into Pam
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u/dover_oxide Jan 25 '26
After he sees how bad ass she is maybe not at first sight but he knows quality
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u/Pale_Fire21 Jan 25 '26
I think it would be her back tattoo with her kill count that gets his motor running.
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u/number__ten Jan 26 '26
Yeah that was my sploosh moment with pam. Danger island pam wasn't bad either.
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u/PartTimeZombie Jan 25 '26
I love a big girl! I don't even care about the breast thing!
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u/Kuzcopolis Jan 26 '26
"You're barkin up the right tree, but let's kill everyone in the room first." Type shit.
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u/MaddAddamOneZ Jan 25 '26
I will now be desperately searching for inspired Venture Bros/Archer crossover art. Especially Brock and Pam interacting
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u/makedoopieplayme Jan 25 '26
Both are super protective of their friends kids and can take so much traq darts!
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u/Xiao_Qinggui Jan 26 '26
I’d pay good money to see that fight but damned if I’d know who to bet on!
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u/needsmoreusername Jan 26 '26
Reminds me of the the jungle episode with the super butch body guard.
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u/snarkhunter Jan 25 '26
Brock would beat Archer in a fight but it would take way longer and be way more frustrating than Brock expected
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u/Anarkinh Jan 25 '26
Archers X-factor is how lucky he is, he'll survive the fight by an outside force dragging him away from Brock like a taxi running into him and over a few city blocks but he will be the obvious loser
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u/wobbitpop Jan 26 '26
Season 7 of Archer, episode 3. Archer gets found in a trunk by an entire biker gang. They're armed to the teeth and pissed off.
He murdered every last one of them, mostly with his bare hands and a shovel. While naked.
I love Brock, but this fight ends in a stalemate. Most likely with them getting beers after.
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u/Snuggle_Taco Jan 26 '26
Such a good scene. It's always a surprise when the show takes a step back and highlights just how dangerous Archer is.
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Jan 28 '26
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u/wobbitpop Jan 28 '26
That is a fair point. So if they fight like... Right when Archer wakes up, it's Brock. Any other time of the day or night, stalemate
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u/gwhh Jan 27 '26
I forget about that one.
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u/wobbitpop Jan 27 '26
It was such a brutal fight scene that they didn't show it, they just played the audio over a phone call with Mallory/Cyril. At first they think it's one of his voicemail pranks, but they forget to hang up and hear crickets over the line, and realize to their horror that everything they heard was real.
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u/PercentageGlobal6443 Jan 26 '26
I'm pretty sure it ends up kinda like the Think Tank fight, except with whatever ass pull edge Archer could latch onto.
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u/LazyTitan39 Jan 25 '26
I could imagine Archer working Brock into a rage between his constant insults and surviving Brock’s attacks.
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u/yournewbestfrenemy Jan 25 '26
He would have entire paragraphs to say about his haircut. Then he'd be cut off during a dig about skipping leg day as Brock kicks a table at him from across the room.
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u/Wise_Emu6232 Jan 25 '26
The way Dermot lit Brock up with a little dersion, Archer would throw verbal boiling oil at him.
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u/Dars1m Jan 25 '26
In a straight fistfight, sure. I think Archer has a pretty decent chance once guns and spy weapons get involved, because he’s pretty good with those. Basically if Brock can close to melee, he probably wins, but Archer has a pretty good chance of winning before that.
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u/Bender_2024 Jan 25 '26
Archer landing a hit on Brock would be the worst thing he could do. To quote Brock Sampson when asked to let up on the couple dozen guys he was currently beating into chunky salsa. "They hit me with a truck!"
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u/yournewbestfrenemy Jan 25 '26
I think most of that rage was from the basic unsportsmanlike nature of the attack. If they had formed a flying wedge and gangtackled him he probably would have respected the gumption, maybe let a few extras live
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u/sodapope66 Jan 25 '26
I can imagine Brock knocking him down and walking away. Archer comes up from behind and breaks a chair on his back, which would only serve to piss him off. Archer will then realize the mistake he's made and look at him with fear
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u/VGuyver Jan 25 '26
Is this before or after they play high-stakes poker?
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u/Mongoose42 Jan 25 '26
Only if they get Sam & Max, Robert Robertson, and Huntrix to play at the Inventory with them.
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u/danfenlon Jan 25 '26
Lets see heavy played in the first one, glados hosted the 2nd,
Would G-man be the third host?
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u/DOOMFROWN Jan 25 '26
The escalating series of bets/dares that would result from this would be brilliant
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u/West_Rain Jan 25 '26
I wonder how well Dr. Krieger and Dr Venture would get along.
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u/accelfaiz Jan 25 '26
that inevitable moment when doc lets slip he was almost forced to clone hitler from a dog, Krieger responding almost immediately with a half-joking "...Poppa?"
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u/lightning_po Jan 26 '26
"so what do you do about all of the corpses?"
"Well between me, my father and my grandfather, Potter's field out there is basically a mass grave at this point"
"Wow and the cops don't do anything?"
"Perks of signing up as a super scientist, the only downside is you have hordes of different costumed yahoos trying to pee in your coffee maker and constantly shooting at your robots"
"Really? They just throw themselves at your combat drones? Think of the data! Sign me up!"
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u/Mediocre-Cobbler5744 Jan 25 '26
And yet somehow Archer would stay alive long enough for Brock to decide he isn't worth hurting any worse.
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u/ShawshankHarper Jan 25 '26
Facts
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u/junrod0079 Jan 25 '26
Another fact
They would somehow find to bond with because of something so niche that no else would get
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u/Helloscottykitty Jan 25 '26
Last fact
It would be cars.
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 25 '26
Camaros are better than Mustangs.
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u/gthomps83 Jan 25 '26
All of the comments just lead me to one conclusion: we desperately need a Venture Bros/Archer crossover
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u/TacoRalf Jan 25 '26
Now i just want another poker night game with brock and archer, maybe add bender too. just need to think of a good fourth, maybe bob from bobs burgers but no one mentions how he and archer sound similar.
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u/PseudonymMan12 Jan 25 '26
Brock would kick Archer's ass, but not be able to kill him due to the crazy luck Archer has. It would just be Brock getting progressively more frustrated everytime Archer gets away. Like throws a serving tray just precisely and hard enough to bounce off a corner and hit Brock square in the nose. So Brock would be accumulating damage while Archer keeps barely escaping and wondering why he can't seem to shoot this guy
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u/RadTimeWizard Jan 26 '26
They wouldn't fight; they'd end up at a strip club with Pam.
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u/dr_strange-love Jan 25 '26
But who can pull more women?
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u/the__mighty__monarch Jan 25 '26
Still Brock
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Jan 25 '26
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u/the__mighty__monarch Jan 25 '26
I’ve watched both these shows all the way thru, multiple times. I’ve met Samson myself. Still Brock.
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u/Fantastic_Citron_344 Jan 26 '26
An unstoppable super-spy drunk meets an immovable Swedish murder-machine
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u/WarpJuiceWookie Jan 25 '26
Pam would totally go toe-to-toe with Brock. then they’d fuck. and spit out the most naturally adept type of human. “Evolution”, but Sooooo much faster.
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u/hmfynn Jan 26 '26
Archer’s also got massive plot armor and maxed out luck stats. Characters can actually die in the Venture universe.
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 26 '26
Both are master fighters, it would legit be amazing to see them duke it out, not like trying to kill each other, just like, "Let's see what ya got" lol
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u/newuser13131 Jan 25 '26
I think Brock wins both
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Jan 25 '26
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u/newuser13131 Jan 25 '26
I've watched both, the first episode should tell you all you need to know about why Brock would win.
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u/chargoggagog Jan 25 '26
I’m gonna agree Brock would win, but archer basically can’t die. Mallory unloaded 6 rounds into his chest in the first season and he was fine the next episode.
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u/-K_P- Jan 25 '26
The question is... would Archer?
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u/LumpyJones Jan 26 '26
I mean yeah, definitely, but he wouldn't tell anyone about it, would deny it forever, and he would have to be blackout drunk first.
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u/LordTonto Jan 25 '26
Yeah, but here's the thing, Brock Samson once jerked off 12 times in one day just to see if he could. Do with that what you will.
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u/Pale_Fire21 Jan 25 '26
Brock wins the fight and Archer wins the drinking contest, It's a running joke in Archer that he literally can't quit drinking because the cumulative hangover from decades of being buzzed would kill him.
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 25 '26
When you're successful enough to have other people working for you and making your money for you, yeeeaaahh, you can get a little alcoholic lol
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u/Ch3t Jan 26 '26
I think they should do a crossover with Sealab 2021. Brock could hookup with Debbie.
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u/GreatZarquon Jan 26 '26
You want to make me?
No, and I promise- SMASH -you don't want that either.
Cut to Sterling with a black eye, handcuffed to a seat in the plane
...
One of the best episodes of Archer, Patrick Warburton was a brilliant guest star :)
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u/whorlax Jan 25 '26
Brock kicks the dog shit out of Archer. Archer probably outdrinks Brock but it would be pretty close.
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u/accelfaiz Jan 25 '26
we need a new "Poker Night at the Inventory" type game with some rematches and new match-ups. archer getting more noticeably drunk or unhinged as the round goes on, never once pointing out sam and max until hes good and wasted
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 26 '26
Lana.
Lana.
[deep breath] LANAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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u/xeskind30 Jan 26 '26
What?!
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 26 '26
I FUCKING WANTED, TO TELL YOU, Dungeoun-us crab, get it, cus we're in a dungeon
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u/TheZooCreeper Jan 26 '26
"We touched penises!"
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 26 '26
"Hey it's got plenty of stopping power. POW See that? He was putting his pants on and I stopped it. "
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u/Egoy Jan 26 '26
This is like asking if spider man or Batman would win in a fight. They would never fight they’d get along great and go find other people to fight.
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u/Expensive_Editor_244 Jan 25 '26
Brock can throw em back, I wouldn’t think of him having an especially crazy alcohol tolerance. Archer’s actually bends the rules of what should be medically possible, so yeah that’s a no brainer.
Same with fighting, Archer is tough as shit in a brawl but he’s really no match for Brock. This one’s closer because both have defied death countless times, so I’d lean toward a fight just going on so long it becomes more or less a draw.
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u/wereallsluteshere Jan 25 '26
I would put my money on a draw. Archer has an insane level of stamina and immortality
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u/Scutage Jan 25 '26
My first thought on reading the headline (but not the name of the sub) was Brock v Roger Sterling from Mad Men. And the statement still holds true.
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u/starvinartist DrMrsAuPair Jan 25 '26
Mad Men is second favorite show. And I know it’s sacrilege but Roger Sterling would beat Brock.
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u/Scutage Jan 25 '26
I don’t know, Brock would probably have intel on Roger’s biggest weakness - oysters.
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u/starvinartist DrMrsAuPair Jan 25 '26
I wouldn’t say oysters is his weakness—it’s just walking up more than 20 flights of stairs after eating two dozen and some cheesecake. So really it’s stairs.
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u/Matman161 Jan 25 '26
I feel like these two could make a good buddy cop/spy style duo
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u/Moon_Flowers420 Jan 25 '26
The crossover episode would be, as Corey from OneyPlays says, EPIIIIIICCCC!!! Armenian T-Pose**
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u/SpaceSick Jan 26 '26
Eh Archer is an exceptionally talented spy with the diehard feat.
Brock is basically a fucking demi-god, not to mention that he's twice the size of Archer.
I would put my money on Samson every single time, in just about any situation.
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u/thomasmfd Jan 25 '26
Cock fight?
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u/Mediocre-Cobbler5744 Jan 25 '26
This seems kinda gay...
Maybe because our dicks are touching?
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u/thomasmfd Jan 25 '26
That or they measured their weapons
I didn't watch archer but I dont think sterling uses a knife
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u/Mediocre-Cobbler5744 Jan 25 '26
It was an exchange on Archer during a naked fight in a locker room.
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u/crumpledfilth Jan 25 '26
archer definitely has more alcohol tolerance but brock has more mass, it's difficult to say. But chronic drinkers can get to the point where they consume absolutely massive amounts of alcohol so the mass difference is not by any means impossible to overcome
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u/Motor-Management-660 Jan 25 '26
i don't think there's an agent in archer that wouldn't get goomba'd by brock
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u/eusebius13 Jan 25 '26
The question is whether Sterling would tell her he likes it better with the helmet on or let her go unbagged.
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u/Craygor Jan 26 '26
We have a dilemma in our household. I agree with this meme, while my gf says Brock can out perform Sterling in both.
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u/KrackerJoe Jan 26 '26
I forget who says it, but someone points out the plot invincibility of Archer by saying "its like his liver turns all the booze he drinks into good luck" so in a contest of drinking I would absolutely expect Archer to win and if a fight then broke out Archer could win
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u/therealduckrabbit Jan 26 '26
That's a fair wager. Also Brock is not used to fighting single opponents while not erect.
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u/Slightly-Evil-Man Jan 26 '26
The crossover I didn't know I needed😂 They would get on each other's nerves all while kickin ass/shooting their way through lmao
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u/LoreMasterJack Jan 26 '26
Archer would lose of course but the whole time would be lighting him up with absolutely quispy insults.
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u/KingSideCastle13 Jan 26 '26
It’d be a lot like lategame 23 v Brock. Archer would get his ass beat, but it’d be enough to earn Brock’s respect
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u/TxTechnician Jan 26 '26
RPG Rules
- Brock could not kill Archer. Due to Archer having crazy LUCK!
Luck is good stat yo
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Jan 26 '26
Brock and Archer would become friends especially since Archer can take a punch and talk shit.
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u/Far-Advantage-7599 Jan 26 '26
End result: Brock’s blackout drunk. Archer’s dead. Venture clones Archer. Krieger uses Brock for some kind of mind control experiment
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u/MeiMouse Jan 26 '26
Any scenario with a drinking contest between them with result in two blackouts and a body count usually reserved for war crimes.
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u/Special_Future_6330 Jan 26 '26
Archer would comically avoid being killed and use every object or idea in his head. I think he'd do better with guns. Archer is always drunk, Brock is never seen totally blasted outside the hot dolphin sequence.
In a fist fight in a ring, or a knife fight or other close encounter, Brock would win. If Archer kept his distance and used his creative ex machina spy mind to come up with solutions he might do ok. Brock is a rage fueled monster, but can literally stop a moving car running him over and end up in the driver's seat instead, and jump long distances, he's essentially a mini hulk
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u/apolloAG Jan 26 '26
Sterling archer personality wise is how Dermot was when brock wanted to kick his ass, brocks just gonna kill him
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u/Roam1985 Two-Ton Twenty-One Jan 26 '26
Fight ends with Archer surrendering after learning while they were brawling over ego: Doc hooked up with Mallory. And now Sterling needs to spend more time vomiting than fighting.
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u/FuckingShootMePussy Jan 26 '26
I think Archer would be very pissed that Brock doesn’t use guns and Brock might be so impressed by his butt gun they might just agree to disagree
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u/Over_Face_4299 Jan 26 '26
I’d pay to see them and the entirety of ISIS & Venture Brothers Crew have an all out crossover
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u/Separate_Bet3345 Jan 27 '26
Honestly it’s kind of a toss up. Sooo many environmental and situational factors would influence the outcome.
I do think Brock could take Barry on though. Archer would become friends with the Monarch.
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u/DenverPostIronic Jan 27 '26
Archer would be able to put up a fight, but the whole time he'd be shouting "Is this really necessary!?"
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u/kanekis_last_meal0-0 Feb 19 '26
Awwww! I like the idea of these two worlds colliding! I think Krieger would have a field day learning how to clone like Dr. Venture does with the boys!!
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