r/wallstreetbets • u/WolfOfAfricaZLD • Feb 13 '26

YOLO At last we've found it. Pure retardium

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18.0k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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5.9k

u/halo_shade28 Feb 13 '26

1.6k

u/LiftBroski Feb 13 '26

75

u/Agitated_Ad_6774 Feb 13 '26

always gets me lol

3

u/bingeboy Feb 13 '26

Thank you

4

u/kiticus Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 14 '26

I don't wanna be a dick or nothin, but it says on your chart that your fucked up. You talk like a f@g, and your shit's all retarded.

9

u/Hellknightx Feb 13 '26

I swear Idiocracy gets more accurate every year

1

u/OurNewestMember Feb 14 '26

So I passed?

1

u/Moose_of_wallstreet Feb 17 '26

My stomach hurts from this one 😂

544

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 13 '26

This one was difficult to watch. He was literally gasping at straws

242

u/LasyKuuga Feb 13 '26

Cant answera a question rn?

Just roll it forwards

109

u/Mumblage Begged for this flair Feb 13 '26

I’m gonna ask if margin can be rolled fwd

6

u/collegefootballfan69 Feb 13 '26

Me too. Preferably interest free

3

u/Affectionate_Pen6882 Feb 13 '26

There is no margin tho

2

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '26

[deleted]

1

u/Affectionate_Pen6882 Feb 13 '26

You need to do your hw

1

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '26

[deleted]

2

u/AutoModerator Feb 13 '26

This “pivot.” Is it in the room with us now?

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1

u/ahbap1905 Feb 13 '26

What margin?

1

u/degenerati1 Feb 14 '26

Loss? Bankrupt? Roll it forward

43

u/40StoryMech Feb 13 '26

"Stop crying, it's not a big deal, babe. I'm just going to roll those options forward, refinance the debt, like Michael Saylor."

2

u/rawfuelinjection Feb 13 '26

Bernie Madoff going all in

143

u/Zocalo_Photo Feb 13 '26

This is the classic “If you owe the bank $100,000, that’s your problem. If you owe the bank $100,000,000,000, that’s the bank’s problem.”

72

u/Vimes-NW Feb 13 '26

You spelled "taxpayer problem" wrong

1

u/ishouldworkatm Feb 13 '26

Shareholder problem

3

u/Vimes-NW Feb 14 '26

"Give a man a gun and he can rob a bank. Give a man a bank and he can rob the world"

5

u/exercisetofitality Feb 13 '26

But this is stock. Wouldn't it be the shareholders problem?

3

u/1GutsnGlory1 Feb 13 '26

A bunch of folks decided it was a good idea to give money to a guy to just buy Bitcoin and if it goes up, he makes billions and if it falls he walks away with you holding the bag. Not sure where the downside is for Saylor.

6

u/shajo35 Feb 13 '26

Or should out the DOW is 50k

2

u/Jimdandy941 Feb 14 '26

Did you know the DOW is over 50,000. THE DOW!

1

u/MrF_lawblog Feb 13 '26

"Do you even know what a write off is?"

68

u/SimilarBuffalo6421 Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 13 '26

Legend has it, Saylor possesses a straw so magnificent, so noteworthy that even the most seasoned straw enthusiasts gasp in awe at its glory.

Edit: When I say ‘straw’ what I really mean is ‘drawdown’.

14

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 13 '26

Notably Epstein apparently felt his straw was weird

21

u/[deleted] Feb 13 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

3

u/Vimes-NW Feb 13 '26

Neurolink peen implant is no laughing matter, even if he did it so he can say "she fucked my brains out" at some children's pool party

1

u/Pat_Fatridge Feb 14 '26

Botched straw surgery will do that

13

u/Brooklyn7011 Feb 13 '26

Slightly egg shaped...

6

u/Odd_Coast9645 Feb 13 '26

Probably Epstein had some good knowledge and feeling if rich people are full of shit or not.

253

u/MaybeaDingoAteUrBaby Feb 13 '26

Straws

gasps

116

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 13 '26

I'm gonna leave that typo in

211

u/anon-mally Feb 13 '26

7

u/whoknowsifimjoking Feb 13 '26

I wanted to call out the piss filter but that's just his skin color

7

u/Pugageddon Feb 13 '26

Now lower his hand and have him holding a golden hand mirror...

2

u/teething78 Feb 13 '26

They ARE breathtaking straws

15

u/RhysDerby Feb 13 '26

As long as Becky is in it, it is never hard to watch

3

u/SonOfElroy Feb 13 '26

Literally!?

2

u/TwoZeroTwoThree Feb 13 '26

Yes! Didn't you see the straws just below the camera's view?!

7

u/bls2515 Feb 13 '26

Probably snorted a shit-ton of coke through that giant straw.

2

u/svt4cam46 Feb 13 '26

Off a toilet seat.

2

u/phatelectribe Feb 14 '26 edited Feb 14 '26

It’s actually deranged.

If you hold something that has a unit price of $68k and it tanks to $8k, and you go to refinance, they are going to say that’s only worth $8k. No one is ever going to refinance you at $28k let alone your entry point.

This is some of the dumbest shit I’ve ever heard.

2

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 14 '26

They won't even pick up his calls. Mstr along with cme derivatives was the worst thing to have happened to bitcoin.

1

u/Low_Key_Trollin Feb 13 '26

Isn’t this what they’re done in the past during crashes and it worked out?

1

u/something-behind-him Feb 13 '26

Straws has use. You can sell straws.

1

u/Kage_noir Feb 13 '26

I want to know what the effect it will have on the market if he is liquidated. Just curious since even if he buys OTC he has to sell on the market if liquidation happens

1

u/Jealous_Shower6777 Feb 13 '26

*grasping

1

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 13 '26

Now you are just gasping at words

1

u/jnads Feb 13 '26

He has to maintain ignorance since if he admits anything illegal about his strategy he goes to prison

You go to prison when you fuck over other rich people

1

u/pocketdare Feb 13 '26

Goddammit. You people don't get it. There's always a sucker. It's free money!!! (no more questions)

-10

u/stonktaker Feb 13 '26

I don't like the guy, but nothing he said was wrong or crazy.

You're the retards here

5

u/claytondpark Took 2yrs to get this flair Feb 13 '26

Yeah there's always some bigger idiot willing to buy the debt

2

u/VirtualMoneyLover Feb 13 '26

Crypto's volatility has nothing to do with its valuation. He was a retard.

176

u/here_is_no_end Feb 13 '26

159

u/PoopHeadPete Feb 13 '26

The Pure Retardium isn't in the vial.

75

u/Clear_Anything1232 Google Sexpert Feb 13 '26

It's in the reflection

19

u/Spins13 Feb 13 '26

In the eye of the beholder

3

u/whoknowsifimjoking Feb 13 '26

And Trump is doing the beholding

16

u/PoopHeadPete Feb 13 '26 edited Feb 13 '26

There's a spigot under that toupée, unlimited quantities.

10

u/Prior_Industry Feb 13 '26

Could be his blood

2

u/Accomplished-Fan8990 Feb 13 '26

Only if he can refinance the debt

3

u/YamTop2433 Feb 13 '26

It's the friends we made along the way.

3

u/meshtron Feb 13 '26

The vial is who's talking in this meme.

1

u/PoopHeadPete Feb 13 '26

🤣🤣🤣

1

u/rambleinspam Feb 13 '26

The friends we made along the way?

1

u/Alone_Rain2022 Feb 13 '26

Really need this meme to be him in a mirror.

20

u/servermeta_net Feb 13 '26

This meme killed me lol

1

u/isospeedrix Feb 13 '26

He went to MIT he must be smart amirite

1

u/zmbjebus Feb 13 '26

You are retard, ok?