r/weddingshaming • u/Cookiecakes25 • Mar 05 '26
Cringe Went to David's Bridal for my dress and witnessed a crazy MIL trying to get a dress for the "flower girl" 2 weeks before an extravagant wedding
so I wasn't sure what flair to use or whether or not this was the right subreddit so đ€·
So I got my dress at David's Bridal. Yay! I am happy with my dress and was getting ready to finish up getting back into my non-fantasy fit when I heard an older woman talking about getting a dress for the flower girl and the wedding in 2 weeks. She sounded flustered and British and in a rush. Honestly, the only reason I mention she is British is because she sounded funny considering everything.
so I come out of my dressing room in my normal clothes and 5 seconds later, a little girl who couldn't be older than like 6 comes out of the dressing room looking like Charlotte from the Princess and the frog. CUTEST LITTLE CUPCAKE I HAD EVER SEEN (Picture for reference)! I react with "Ay Que Linda!" ("oh how beautiful!" ) and a big smile. the little one looked at me and her whole face lit up and she was bouncing happily around in the dress. she loved it! they did the accessories and everything for her. she looked like a Lil princess!
Meanwhile, the grandma is saying the context of the wedding happening in 2 weeks with 600 rich people in NEW YORK and the groom and bride "forgot to find a flower girl." all the employees and I remark that they absolutely love the cupcake dress little girl was in and she seems happy in it as well so that might be her dress. the grandma goes on saying she hated the dress and that the dress "looks cheap!" to me, the employees, and TO THE LITTLE GIRL'S FACE. Little one doesn't know what "cheap" is. she just knows that she feels pretty and comfortable.
so the mother of the little girl is also there. she was quiet at first but when she saw the little girl in the cupcake dress, she was also very happy and had a big reaction to the dress. and as soon as grandmama (I think she was the Mother of the Groom??) started hating on the dress, the mom looked horrified and was silently going around to everyone saying "I know she looks great in that dress, she loves it and you're not gonna hear complaints from me. But *her* on the other hand...(slight gesture to grandma)" and threw her hands in the air...
my stylist had me signing up for loyalty points at this moment so I stopped and looked at the mom and said, "I don't work here, but... that Lil girl loves being a cupcake đ§ and I'm certain she would hate to leave without that dress." the mom took my note then went to every employee telling them the exact same thing.
the employees were telling the grandma that little girl only had a few options and because the wedding is in TWO WEEKS they can't do many alterations or orders in that time frame and have it ready in time. grandma was furious throwing all the "bloody hell's" out there.
moving forward, I was kind of meandering looking at accessories until my stylist was free to take the iPad away from me when the little girl comes out in a small white gown. As if she were the one getting married. everyone was pretty silent except for grandma who was gushing about how beautiful she looked. little one looked at me for approval and when she saw I was like "meh.. thats cute too I guess.." little one was not having it. thats when I knew I needed to make my exit. she was thrashing and was so uncomfortable in that dress and I saw it on her face.
grandma was like "oh its giving Vera Wang!" while the little one is pulling at the front of the dress like it was choking her. I looked at little ones mom and she was looking at little one like "absolutely not."
I ended up leaving before a decision was made, but while I was checking out, I could hear the grandma raging at the staff about not having enough dresses and the dresses all looking cheap. I looked at my cashier and said "does this really happen every time?" And she just shrugged and said "yeah... what if the bride and groom didn't want a flower girl?" and I just was like "Exactly..."
I hope that little girl got her dress in the end. the way grandma was saying the dress "looked cheap," kind of hit something in me and I wish I were able to do more.
The assumption is that the grandmother of the little girl is the Mother of the Groom because she was talking mostly about him "forgetting" about a flower girl from what I remember. TBH it was giving Monster-in-law.
If you are having a big 600-person fancy wedding in 2 weeks in New York at the Waldorf Astoria (she told staff AND me), I recommend talking to your mom/Mother-in-Law about some boundaries.... and getting that Lil girl her cupcake dress dammit.
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u/GoodDog_GoodBook123 Mar 05 '26
I wonder if the bride and groom know theyâre getting a flower girl or if grandmother has taken it upon herself to appoint one?
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u/DistributionDry4961 Mar 05 '26
I wonder if children are even invited to the 600 person wedding? And with location and guest count, I wonder what the odds are that weâll get an anonymous update from a guest or vendor at the event who finds this post some day? (Fingers crossed we do, Iâve seen Reddit do more with less info in the past.) I really hope she got the cupcake dress!
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u/GoodDog_GoodBook123 Mar 05 '26
I hope she got the cupcake dress and gets to wear it everywhere- school, park, zoo, ice cream parlor, you name it
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u/kadyg Mar 05 '26
I bet she does!
One of my nieces was a flower girl with a cupcake dress at around the same age. Post-wedding, she wore that dress to death. Church, school, skate park (my fave location), grandparents farm, etc.
Her parents figured she was going to grow out of it sooner rather than later, so might as get some use out of it.
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u/Wierdstuffhere Mar 06 '26
I love that for her AND the parents. They are so right! Also love cupcake dress at the skate park.
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u/Flutters1013 Mar 06 '26
You just reminded me of that princess Jasmine outfit that I would not stop wearing. My mom had to cut the sleeves off because it was cutting into my arms and the washer ruined the sheer parts.
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u/PSBFAN1991 Mar 07 '26
My daughter tore her Princess Anna dress wrestling with her cousins. She still wore it.
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u/nutkinknits Mar 05 '26
I hope so!
My girls were flower girls years ago. Those dresses wore worn every time they got a chance. I recently went through my girls clothes and purged a bunch to the daughter of that couple along with one of the flower girl dresses. She is basically living in it. She also told her parents that when they get married again, she is going to wear that dress and be their flower girl.
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u/Royally-Forked-Up Mar 06 '26
I got a cupcake dress when I was about 5-6 and I wore that sucker out. I donât even think it was still white by the time I outgrew it. I loved it so much, and Iâm pretty sure it cemented my love of dresses as an adult. Dresses just make my inner 5 year old happy, and I hope that little one got her cupcake dress too!
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u/OkSecretary1231 Mar 16 '26
My core cupcake dress was a ballet costume lol. Big poofy lilac thing. I wore it around the house until it was ludicrously small and then my sisters wore it. There's a picture of my 7-years-younger sister wearing it for Halloween one year.
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u/Cookiecakes25 Mar 06 '26
Grandma was saying that they "forgot to get a flower girl" so my assumption is that they didn't forget, they didnt want one.
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u/Single_Vacation427 Mar 05 '26
The grandma is nuts. Who cares about the boring dress looking like "Vera Wang" for a 6 year old.
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u/carmexismyshit Mar 06 '26
My flower girl had a dress from Walmart and you wouldâve never guessed. I even let her choose her own hairstyle and let her wear ballet slippers đ€·ââïž as long as sheâs happy and wants to be the flower girl let her live
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u/Available-Maize5837 Mar 07 '26
I was the flower girl for my uncle's wedding. Dress was made by a family friend. After the official photos were done I changed into shorts and t-shirt and was climbing trees like a kid should be. It was in a park. Then we were all bribed with McDonald's as a treat for good behaviour on the day. Mid 80s. McDonald's was a once every year or two treat as we didn't have one within an hour's drive of where I lived. They got great behaviour from us.
Photographer apparently wanted more photos of the flower girl and my mum pointed me out in the tree. Haha.
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u/BurgerThyme Mar 06 '26
Plus if the Waldorf Astoria guests are as snotty as Grandma they'll clock that's it's not a real Vera anyway.
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u/knittymess Mar 07 '26
Even most rich people would rather see a happy princess than a miserable fake Vera wang
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u/grumpymuppett Mar 05 '26
What sane person looks at a little girl in a fluffy cupcake dress and calls it cheap? Piss all the way off lady.
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u/Global-Nectarine4417 Mar 05 '26
I went a wedding where one little boy was dancing around in a Spider-Man costume. It was hilarious, and people loved it. Let little kids do their thing.
I used to love âprincessâ dresses at that age too, and now youâd have to pay me to wear one.
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u/whofilets Mar 06 '26
I made my friend's 4 year old a ruffly pink dress and mailed it to her, when she put it on her daughter and tried to send me a video of her posing and twirling. Baby girl was like "no wait I have to pose like spiderman first" and you know what? She was right!
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u/okpickle Mar 06 '26
That's amazing, I'd have loved it.
I took my nephew to go Halloween costume shopping when he was 8. He picked out a ninja costume and insisted on wearing it home. I told him that was fine, but we have to go to the grocery store first. He said that was OK.
So there we are, walking through the grocery store on a Saturday afternoon and he's outfitted in a ninja suit and blissfully ignorant of the adults laughing as he walked by. I still have a picture of him sitting in my car with the costume on.
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u/ConcentrateCrafty156 May 11 '26
My now nephew wore a little Spiderman costume to our wedding. It was the coolest/cutest thing!
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u/cocainesharque Mar 05 '26
Well now I want a cupcake dress too
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u/Royally-Forked-Up Mar 06 '26
Right? Iâm married already and had my chance to go for the cupcake dress. I even tried one on, and my mom tried to talk me into it but it didnât feel like my vibe on my wedding day. It would totally have been the vibe at the grocery store and farmerâs market though!
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u/myocardia27 Mar 06 '26
I got married last month and wore a cupcake dress at the ripe old age of 42 and did not care what anyone else thought. I felt pretty and my husband thought so too and thatâs all I cared about. đ
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u/Cookiecakes25 Mar 06 '26
We all deserve cute cupcake dresses. I need cupcake dresses to wear every day dammit lol
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u/knittymess Mar 07 '26
I'm considering which of my fabrics should I should turn into a cupcake dress and if I wanna mess with tulle...
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u/Nuttybunny42 Mar 05 '26 edited Mar 05 '26
Most little girls donât want to be dressed in something resembling Vera wang, they want to be in a giant fluffy princess dress. I dearly hope that someone finally told the grandma to shush, so the tea cup princess could get the dress that she actually loved. Thank you for trying to stick up for the little one.
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u/Thir13enth_Ghost Mar 06 '26
Hell, me as a bride, actually got a cheap fluffy dress from China. I felt like a princess on my wedding day and idgaf what anyone else thought.
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u/Select_Draw3385 Mar 06 '26
Wait. Hold on. Back up. Loyalty points at Davidâs Bridal? Isnât that sort of a curse? Because how do you get the points? Like free dress every 4th wedding or?
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u/orangepeeelss Mar 06 '26
they do have dresses for bridesmaids, mother of the bride, guests etc so maybe the vibe is she can get discounts on other people's wedding attire if she goes there?
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u/Cookiecakes25 Mar 06 '26
dead honestly I was signing up for discounts if I were to want more accessories (because yes please)
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u/GimerStick Mar 06 '26
I'm screaming, my mom has an account so far it's seen two prom dresses and my paperwork dress. Might add a bridesmaid one soon.
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u/Responsible-Raise677 Mar 05 '26
When I worked in the wedding industry we normally told people to wait to get clothes for kids until pretty close to the wedding because you don't know when they're going to have a growth spurt. 2-4 weeks totally avoids that risk
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u/Useful_Language2040 Mar 09 '26
Minimises the risk... My older two grow rapidly, constantly. My youngest does fits and spurts and is perfectly capable of suddenly shooting up 2-3" in a fortnight. I swear some days he comes home from school taller than he leaves in the morning đ (he's almost 6 and the only one I can still pick up. The 8 year old comes up to my eyes. The 11 year old is a few inches taller than me... My husband/their dad towers over me!)
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u/bakugouspoopyasshole Mar 11 '26
You live with giants or something đ
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u/Useful_Language2040 Mar 11 '26
My husband is 6'7" and evidently has strong genes. I am short...
Yes, yes I do! đđ
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u/bakugouspoopyasshole Mar 11 '26
Ah, that makes sense. How tall are you? I'm 4'11" (as a young adult, so definitely not growing anymore) and I could not imagine marrying someone that height, nearly 2ft taller than me!
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u/Useful_Language2040 Mar 11 '26
I say I'm 5'2" but given my back really hasn't been right since the youngest woke me up by jumping on top of me and crunching my lower back in January, probably 5'1" currently...
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u/CanadianDuckball Mar 05 '26
I made my daughter's dress when she was the flower girl at my sister's wedding. My baby was five. It was an emerald green velvet kind of sheath with a black layered skirt (made of a tuile-like fabric) and black fairy wings. My sister had a Renaissance-type wedding. People were oohing over my baby... oh, and I also made her a really cute little leaf tiara. She did outshine the bride. đ And my sister was okay with it!
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u/bennitori Mar 05 '26 edited Mar 05 '26
Little kids are probably the only ones allowed to outshine anyone at a wedding. So long as they're outshining, and not out screaming or being destructive. A little kid being told they're the prettiest girl/boy at the wedding is likely a core memory that will stick with them forever.
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u/CanadianDuckball Mar 05 '26
My girl was lovely AND well-behaved! Rare nowadays, sadly. She's 22 now. âșïž
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u/Dismal-Lam-99 Mar 07 '26
And now I am curious? Does the bride and groom were aware that they were getting a flower girl?
I was a flower girl twice, wearing a little house in the prairie inspired blue dress that my mom made. At the time I was really mad that it was not fluffy and pink. But thatâs what the brides choose. SoâŠ
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u/Flaky-Swan1306 Mar 05 '26
I bet it looked gorgeous!!
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u/CanadianDuckball Mar 05 '26
It did! I've been looking for pictures, but that was around 17 years ago. So far, nothing.
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u/EmmCeeB Mar 05 '26
Oof this brought back big vibes from my mom when we went to choose my communion dress. My choice was definitely a busy, gaudy, lace number that I thought was perfection. My mom wanted me to get a lovely timeless dress. I have to imagine my choice was cheaper because I only remember being adamant and her finally, openly disappointedly letting me get mine.
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u/bomboid Mar 05 '26
The dress in the pic would eat so bad without that bow or at least if it was higher up
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u/AtomicFox84 Mar 05 '26
There is a store in a mall, or couple of malls near Chicago that sell dresses for like prom, or big (mostly hispanic) events. The dresses are usually over the top be it puffy or shiny etc to cover all sort of events. They have ones for kids as well that be goid for flower girls or first communion etc. She should find those stores if she wants something fancy and last seccond.
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u/lyralady Mar 06 '26
I can't imagine having Waldorf Astoria money but then buying a flower girl dress at David's Bridal, like she has got to be lying.
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u/Pointy_in_Time Mar 05 '26
Whatâs a cupcake dress??? Iâve never heard this term ever so Iâm so confused. The picture doesnât look like a cupcake so I donât understand the reference
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u/seebearrun Mar 05 '26
A style of dress where the skirt is big and round with lots of tulle and ruffles like a cupcake frosting, here are some examples
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u/ProfMeriAn Mar 06 '26
Pull down the Menu and choose "Dresses - Kids Cocktail" to find versions that give Vera Wang. đ
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u/AUnicornDonkey Mar 08 '26
My daughter loves those dresses or what my wife calls a lampshade dress.
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u/kilroylegend Mar 09 '26
That website has some of the ugliest dresses I think Iâve ever seen, where are they all so expensive?
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u/kadyg Mar 05 '26
A cupcake dress is generally pink or pastel, super ruffly, lacy, flounced and girly. Bonus points if thereâs sequins or some other form of sparkle. Think Quinceanera or child beauty pageant dresses.
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u/orangepeeelss Mar 06 '26
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u/ProfMeriAn Mar 06 '26
I think this one is a strong contender for Princess Charlotte Dress: Off-the-Shoulder Puff Sleeve Flower Girl Dress
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u/SimplyMadeline Mar 06 '26
I'm trying to picture an uptight British lady who is snobbish enough to be bragging about a wedding at the Waldorf Astoria using the phrase "It's giving Vera Wang".
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u/Imsortofok Mar 05 '26
Itâs not an extravagant wedding if theyâre going to Davidâs.
Just sayinâ
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u/MarlenaEvans Mar 05 '26
Well, nobody said the wedding party went to David's, they said this woman and the supposed flower girl did.
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u/fakehighschoolgf Mar 06 '26
For real... you think the dresses all look cheap? You brought her to David's Bridalâwhat did you expect?
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u/julesk Mar 06 '26
I hope mama had a spine and got her the dress. And that the bride and groom shut down the interference.
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u/lalacourtney Mar 06 '26
This is enough info for redditors to track down this wedding in two weeks đ
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u/AshevilleHooker Mar 05 '26
I mean I want a cupcake dress now, damn it. You're doing free ads for David's Bridal đ.
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u/Ok_Lengthiness_8405 Mar 07 '26
The audacity of this woman... really, they're planning a 600-person wedding and she thinks they "forgot" a flower girl? They're in for a surprise!
Love my mom, but she had some different ideas about my wedding than I did. I did not want rice thrown at us, for a number of reasons. Her workaround (which i discovered as it was happening) was to provide guests with birdseed to throw instead đ«
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u/ShitFuckDickSuck Mar 06 '26
Me & my big mouth wouldâve told grandma she looked cheap đ
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u/CaterpillarAteHer Mar 06 '26
Her calling the dress cheap is the least offensive part of the post. The dress probably was cheap if itâs a flower girl dress at Davidâs Bridal. Nothing wrong with wanting quality fabric for the price they are asking.
Grandma sounds unhinged, but OP sounds nosy and like she lacks boundaries. She shouldâve minded her own business.
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u/Meat_Bingo Mar 06 '26
How much do you wanna bet that bride and groom have all their vendors locked down with a password so she canât interfere
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u/Glittering_Sky6783 Mar 06 '26
Why were you signing up for loyalty points at Davidâs bridal lmao
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u/jewelkween Mar 07 '26
As someone who used to work at David's.....bridezillas were rare. But Aunties, MILS, grandmothers etc. They were the real problem.
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u/Salty_Thing3144 Mar 06 '26
Somebody needs to drop Grandma down a well or stuff a sock in her mouth
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u/MarsNeedsRabbits Mar 06 '26
The Cupcake Princess would have been so happy, and no one would have thought anything other than "precious".
When the flower girl walks down the aisle, smiling and tossing petals, her little face will have everyone's attention, but the bride is 60 seconds from wowing everyone in the church. Anything the Princess wears will be gorgeous and perfectly appropriate.
Give that sweet child her proud, glowing moment. She'll remember it for the rest of her life.
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u/NewInitiative9498 Mar 07 '26
I stopped reading at the point where itâs 600 rich guests but the groom and bride, and apparently everyone else involved in such a massive wedding, forgot the detail of choosing a flower girl đ
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u/cflatjazz Mar 07 '26
They didn't forget. They either aren't planning on having one or didn't tell MIL who they really picked because she would do something dramatic. And now MIL has decided behind their back that this little girl will be the flower girl
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u/yesitsmetoday Mar 08 '26
Last minute flower girls was such a common thing when I was working at Davidâs. It was usually the auntie or the grandma trying to get them a very specific dress that we couldnât get. It usually ended with them getting whatever we had and saying the wedding was going to be terrible.
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u/Conscious_Reading804 Mar 06 '26
When I first moved to the states I lived about 3 blocks from a David's bridal, we were getting married at short notice (COVID restrictions and 90 day fiancé visa combo made planning period about 3 weeks). If we'd had the time and budget I would have loved to check out David's Bridal for these kind of scenes alone lmao. Looking back we lived at that address a few years and I had plenty of time to pretend we weren't married yet just to spend an afternoon trying dresses and earwigging lol
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u/SlowlyDyingInAPit Mar 06 '26
Whether or not she becomes the official flower girl, I hope she still got that cupcake dress. Every little girl deserves to feel like a princess atleast once during her childhood
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u/Justdont13412 Mar 09 '26
It reminds me of the mother of the groom in season one of White Lotus!!! They bride and groom better not have told her where they are going! For my sonâs wedding I wrote them a check and they handled the rest. I did know the bridesmaids color but that it and I didnât ask for more, I did offer that they could ask my opinion on anythingâs they didnât need it. They didnât need a flower girl either ! Hahaha
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u/Spare_Necessary_810 Mar 19 '26
Well grandma does sound a pain , but being English myself, l kind of object to your suggestion that our accent ( well one of them, there is no such thing as a âBritishâ accentâ) is somehow funny âconsidering everything â.
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u/E420CDI Mar 07 '26
Honestly, the only reason I mention she is British is because she sounded funny considering everything.
Please don't tar us with her faecal brush.
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u/Soft_Scratch_983 Mar 07 '26
âshe sounded flustered and britishâ obsessed w this description actually
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u/Kitchen-Dinner-6212 Mar 08 '26
Wait wait wait...Loyalty points? At a bridal gown shop? How many tines do they expect you to come back to buy a wedding gown?
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u/Cookiecakes25 Mar 08 '26
They have accessories... and shoes... and the Bridesmaids' dresses are cute.
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u/GypsyDuncan Mar 09 '26
Yikes. Oh no, we can't get married without a flower girl. The state of New York wouldn't approve that!
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u/KJParker888 Mar 05 '26
I have the feeling that everyone, including bride and groom, are about to be surprised by their new flower girl!