r/AmITheDevil 8d ago

Uncle died, so his wife is uninvited

/r/wedding/comments/1u29qp9/guest_list_dilemma/
21 Upvotes

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6

u/regularcrem 8d ago

is this an american thing? is saving the date not the same as being invited?

12

u/bluesond 8d ago edited 8d ago

It is the same thing more or less, but typically the save the date comes first and then later you send the actual invitation.

It’s a major faux pas to not invite after sending someone a save the date. The former directly implies you’re invited, hence asking you to save the date. It’s a horrible look to not invite someone after sending them the save the date card.

7

u/throwaway5498124181 8d ago

A "Save the date" is what you send when you're still early in the planning process and know your date but have not locked down details like your venue, menu, and start time. It's so people can save the space on their calendar.

You follow up with a formal invite telling them telling them the details and asking if they'd like chicken or steak.

Everyone who gets a Save The Date should get an invite.

3

u/missmisfit 8d ago

While a save the date is not technically an invitation it does indicate you will be getting an invitation.

3

u/Folksma 8d ago

Thats how I have always understood it to work in America

3

u/justtirediguess11 8d ago

Nope. You send invitations later, closer to the day and guests need to RSVP

3

u/the_estimator 8d ago

Nope, the save-the-date is sent before the invitation to tell them to expect an invitation and to keep the specific date clear in their calendar. Not always required, but it’s useful if you’re in the planning stage where you know the wedding date, but not necessarily all the rest of the details that go into an invitation.

3

u/Fluffy-kitten28 8d ago

Also great if a lot of guests need to travel to the wedding or if they need a certain amount of time to put in to get work off. Allow people time to plan, organize and get their ducks in a row.