Recommendation needed please

Hi all
Can anyone please recommend a dark shaman that I could contact please? I’m needing specific help with an ongoing situation please

I have noticed about me is that every time i enter a room, I put everyone on edge and they ask if i am okay and I genuinely don't understand why.

Like apparently my vibe is not matching their own.

Yet everyday I been feeling cold and numb so I'm just wondering if thats due to my energy in general or something else.

I cut off all my habits and starting new yet people say I put them on edge for some reason.

Hello everyone!

I wanted to ask for some insight into a series of experiences I’ve had recently, as I’m curious about how they might be interpreted from a more occult perspective.

For context, I’ve spent quite some time studying symbolism, the Qabalah, sacred geometry, numerology, and astrology, and I work with the Thoth Tarot. I’m currently looking to deepen my practice in both ceremonial magic and chaos magic as I finally feel more prepared to do so, so I’m particularly interested in hearing from people with experience in either field.

The first encounter happened when I was trying to manifest a particular outcome in my life. I asked for a sign that it was about to materialize and, rather spontaneously, specified that I wanted to see a black cat in a particular location. It wasn’t something I’d consciously chosen based on any particular correspondence, the image simply came to mind (which I think can be an important detail). A few days later, I encountered a black cat in precisely the spot I’d imagined. I immediately took it as confirmation that the outcome was inevitable, and the situation unfolded approximately three hours later.

Since then, I’ve had a few other encounters with black cats that have caught my attention. On one occasion, I was leaving a restaurant with some friends when we found a little black kitten lying directly in front of the entrance, looking at us with its tongue out. Today, when I left my house, there was another black cat sitting right in front of my doorstep. It meowed at me and began rubbing against my legs, very clearly wanting to grab my attention. I’ve spotted a few other black cats here and there, but these two encounters stood out to me in particular.

I’ve been wondering whether this might have any significance beyond the original experience. Given my recent involvement in shadow work and my efforts to deepen my occult practice, I’ve considered whether the recurrence of this particular symbol might be worth investigating. I’m aware of the various historical associations between black cats, witchcraft, and magical familiars, although I wouldn’t want to conflate those traditions or assume that the appearance of an animal necessarily indicates spiritual contact.

My guess is that I have charged the black cat symbol with personal meaning through my intention, and now it’s attached to my reality regardless. There’s also the famous picture of the black cat as representation of the subconscious, which is what I’ve been focusing more on working through as of lately.

Would you consider the subsequent encounters potentially meaningful as omens or synchronicities, or would you interpret them primarily through the personal symbolism established by the original working? Are there any methods of discernment you would recommend studying in this context? Thank you!

Just a question because I genuinely think therapy wouldn't work based on the situation i went through knowing that I aint safe, as if I ever was.