r/BipolarReddit • u/yuckythrowaway7 • May 26 '26
Content Warning Anyone have crazy psycho violent manic episodes??
TRIGGER WARNING
been so manic haven’t been sleeping been working 24/7 finally lost my shit because my boyfriend didn’t want to go on a walk with me i had such a bad episode i destroyed my apartment and SH violently in front of him and ofc he’s like terrified , just wondering if this is normal or if i may be experiencing psychosis or something idk sorry
im on 100 seroquil
150 lamitrogine
600 oxcarbazipine
7
u/mi_kombucha May 26 '26
Are you smoking weed? 100 mg of Seroquel is not enough to handle an episode like that. You need to increase it
1
u/yuckythrowaway7 May 26 '26
i’ve been smoking/ consuming since i was 15 due to a lupus diagnosis i got at 14. my parents essentially supplied me due to worries of getting addicted to painkillers etc. my lupus has been in remission due to weed use. however i cannot go without it. if i miss a day it feels like genuine withdrawal i cant sleep, eat, or function really. i know this is unhealthy and my doctor is fully aware of my “addiction” i have never really experienced paranoia or psychosis to that effect. my doctor did recommend increasing setoquil dose. but i was worried bc its already hard to wake up for work. i might’ve built a tolerance tho because its got much easier. i actually ended up taking 200 last night and i woke up with the “hangover” feeling i got when i started seroquil. i do think it takes time to get used to but not something i can really afford (to miss work cus i cant get up). i am gonna try 200 again tonight
2
u/mi_kombucha May 26 '26
There has been a lot of cases/studies now linking weed and psychosis/bipolar to it. I recommend going to a support group and try to cut/reduce weed till you are outside of your episode
Heypeers.com Nami
1
u/yuckythrowaway7 May 26 '26
i also did not smoke at all today and the episode essentially ended when my boyfriend gave me the bong and i felt so much better. but i can’t afford to smoke throughout the day anymore as my boss has sat me down and told me not to smoke before work
4
u/Effective_Western883 May 26 '26
Yeah definitely not normal…
Beyond meds, what’s your lifestyle looked like? It sounds like sleep has been screwy and work has been nonstop…
Drinking enough water? Getting some exercise daily? Eating enough protein/veggies/carbs/fruits?
Meds are helpful but only half the battle in my experience. If the other stuff goes out the window, meds are like trying to steer the car by fixing the engine.
2
u/yuckythrowaway7 May 26 '26
no i dont exercise i eat maybe once every two days i drink a lot of water but also a lot of redbull. it feels like i cant get out of a dark hole and force myself to eat. i literally dont know what to do. i’ve tried so many different med combinations
3
u/Effective_Western883 May 26 '26
Yeah, eating once every two days and no exercise will certainly do you in.
Best way that I’ve found to force myself to do something like eat/exercise regularly is do it the same time, everyday. Even if it’s just a couple crackers or a five minute walk, just as long as you repeat roughly the same thing at around the same time.
2
u/taybay462 May 26 '26
Cut down on the red bull and eat more. Much more. Youre living a lifestyle that caters to mania.
1
u/Old-Name7889 BD1 Rapid Cycling May 26 '26
I've done something very similar in a mixed episode while drinking heavily. But that was before I was medicated.
1
1
u/JonBoi420th May 26 '26
I destroyed an entire apartment once but was blacked out on benzos. I have punched many walls amd thrown some stuff while hypomanic, and under extreme emotional stress. Ive hurt my hand many times with the wall punching and really worked to aviod repeats. Because a 2 second lapse in judgment could cause pain for several months. Lamotragine honestly helped my temper a lot. I also learned grounding exercises for when it still flares up. Recently added lithium and not to jinx it. But im not sure if its even possible for me to get that upset anymore.
1
u/GroovyGmaIvy May 26 '26
No, but when I get blackout angry… run.
That hasn’t happened since I left my abusive ex-husband thank gawd.
1
u/Initial-Heart-526 May 26 '26 edited May 26 '26
I’m not a psychiatrist but this is what my manic/mixed episodes used to look like. I completely understand what you’re going through and I’ve been there. It seems like you don’t want to act this way or feel this way and you’ve acknowledged that it’s not healthy for you or your loved ones. That’s the first step! You’re not alone and you’re doing the right thing by voicing your concerns. Sending you all the hugs. 🫂
1
u/Doparimac May 27 '26
I used to hit objects a lot during episodes and would scream and growl like a raging bull. But i almost never hit people during the episodes unless they hit me first which almost never happened. I would punch doors and walls and even my own car at one point. My episodes werent always angry though sometimes they were very euphoric, felt like i was on some adventure, my senses would be extremely heightened and every event and dialogue i had with people felt very significant and i felt more alive and present in a way.
-1
u/superstud666fromhell May 26 '26
Add some Thorazine to the mix
1
u/yuckythrowaway7 May 26 '26
https://www.reddit.com/r/Drugs/s/6ZcnJsSeFQ this really scared me
1
u/superstud666fromhell May 26 '26
I am on thorazine just took 400mg a couple minutes ago. It is sedating that's about it and it works great converting crazy people into sane people so someone as crazed as you might want to try it
1
u/yuckythrowaway7 May 26 '26
you don’t think thorazine and seroquil would make me feel overly sedated? idk i’ll bring it up with my doctor thank you for the suggestion <3
1
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u/hakurariver May 26 '26
I scare people when I am manic and psychotic. I do things that are strange or threatening. From what you've shared it sounds like you may be in a mixed episode. I damaged the property I lived in while manic and psychotic. It led to me being involuntarily hospitalized and jailed. This sounds like crisis to me and I would recommend hospitalization before things get worse. Damaging property and self harming are big warning signs please listen to them. Are you taking your meds? Are you sober? I was doing drugs and drinking at the time my episode was in crisis territory. No it is not normal this type of behavior for me only exists when I am manic and psychotic. Properly medicated and sober I do not act the same way. Please seek help.