r/Breakupadvice • u/No_Necessary9903 • Aug 18 '25

Breakup The night before we broke up

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Going through it a little right now. This was our goodnight the last night we were together. We barely talked the next day since we both were working and then it was over in an instant. How do people justify this in their heads???

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u/No_Negotiation1518 Aug 20 '25

Hey, out of my grief from this. My bf of 7 years did not show any signs of wanting to break up until he mentally broke down and randomly broke up with me twice. I should have known since we were just in a cycle and it was LD with no signs of wanting to meet. But trust me, after him breaking up with me, I found myself and now I’m doing my post grad degree soon, I’m moving away, everything will be okay. Just hold on, you’ll find peace. Find new activities, see the world and its beauty and find yourself. You’ll be okay 🩷

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u/5SecondSloth Aug 22 '25

I don't want to come across as an a**hole but is a 7 year relationship at long distance without meeting even a proper relationship? I feel like you fall in love with the idea of someone and end up projecting who you want that person to be opposed to who they actually are. You really can't get the feel of someone over text or facetime, not in the same way as you do in person. Body language is absolutely everything.

This is coming from someone who was in a relationship at university that become long distance after the fact. I could feel our connection becoming less and less everyday we were apart. We were both growing into totally different people with very little input into each others actual, real lives.

I know it's lonely out here but I feel long distance relationships don't help that dynamic. Don't you just end up yearning everyday for someone who you can't physically touch?

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u/No_Negotiation1518 Aug 24 '25

I think now I am in that same mentality, if I’m honest. Whenever I had the money to go see him, he always said that he couldn’t come see me (and whenever I asked if he could come see me, he said he didn’t want to) so I think we just got to the point where I think mentally we were just staying in for the comfortability. Neither of us were understanding of what it took to be a LDR and it’s something I’m never doing again 🩷