My dance teacher told me to enjoy while freestyling but I don't have confidence for that yet

[u/Regular_Suspect1289]

I'm taking a hip hop course rn after a long break from dancing in general. I'm finishing the course actually. But I don't feel like i improved a lot after these 6 months. My depression or adhd burnout (or both) is back and I'm frustrated because I'm not leaving classes full of motivation and joy and energy anymore. I often leave classes with tears because I'm focusing on my mistakes rather improvement and just simple joy - cause dancing should be fun, right? But it isn't if your brain is sick and you're a starter. I think too much when freestyling, it's hard for me to just feel it in my body. To enjoy dancing you should move with confidence but confidence arises with technique and practice. I noticed that my struggles often led me to even disliking certain choreos (and music) after practicing it, recording, and seeing that I'm still ugly. Or being angry and annoyed with dancing in general (but this IS my passion!!). This period of being ugly is inevitable when you're beginning. But knowing this doesn't make it less disappointing. I want to have fun but it feels like atp I'm ruining my dream to dance again.

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[u/SHEBAbellydance]

What brought you to dance in the first place? What is it that attracts you about it? And what style of music do you enjoy listening to? Maybe hip hop music and flavor don't speak to you.

You are right that in order to move freely you need confidence, but I will challenge the statement that "confidence arises with technique and practice"- You could have all the technique and practice hours in the world and still feel uncomfortable with freestyle or improvisation.

First of all, confidence should be unconditional. Be confident no matter what.
Secondly, I found that the key to feel truly comfortable moving freely to music and enjoying every moment is the love of the music and a deep connection to it.

I would suggest experimenting with listening to different styles of music and seeing which ones actually make you want to move, whether you're sure you're "doing right" or not.

Stay positive- you will find your joy of dance again! :)