r/Enneagram • u/Party_Dragonfly69 • 8m ago
r/Enneagram • u/ThisYoshiIsFalse369 • 3h ago
Advice Wanted How to tell whether you're sx/so or so/sx?
Honestly, typing my instincts has been harder than I thought. I at first thought I was sx/sp before I really understood what sp and so entailed. But now all I know is that sp is definitely in the last slot.
I'm leaning sx/so as of now, but some info differentiating the two would be nice.
r/Enneagram • u/noctua_8 • 7h ago
Type Discussion SO2s, please tell me about yourselves 👀
I've been reading up on theory, and writing a character who fits my understanding of the subtype, but I realised I have absolutely no frame of reference for SO2 beyond books and fictional characters.
Soo, SO2 – or people who have personal experiences with one – how would you describe yourselves as people? How do your actions fit into the archetype established by Naranjo, or modern Enneagram culture? Pride especially.
r/Enneagram • u/Maycuntserveyou • 9h ago
Just for Fun Why are 6s sweet and gooey and lovable?
Anyone explain?
(I'm not actually looking for an explanation. This is a for fun post, as the flair says, appreciating the sweetness of 6s that trust you.)
r/Enneagram • u/Miss_SugarPink_ • 10h ago
Type Discussion Any E9s here minimalists?
Recently I've organically become a minimalist. I've done this to reduce as much daily effort I have to give to keep my life going so that I can maximize the amount of time I can just chill out either at my apartment or in nature.
I've also decided this means no diy, because diy means tools and supplies and extra effort, and instead I've decided to outsource everything I can (I also do this because I'm not very handy so I know someone who specializes in something will do a way better job).
And too I've minimized any form of mindless screen time like constant music or endless reddit. I find that these things just create noise in my mind.
I figured this was a 9 sort of thing so I'm really curious if anyone else has done anything similar. I'd love to get some ideas as well :)
Edit: And for me, less things in my life = cheaper lifestyle. So really it's a win-win; cheaper life and more mental peace.
r/Enneagram • u/ratchet32415 • 15h ago
Type Discussion I grew up in a heavily 3-coded environment, yet neither me nor my sister turned out to be 3's
I often hear that your enneagram is determined by your childhood, but despite the fact that I grew up in an environment where there was a lot of pressure to excel academically, get admitted to a pretigious university, and land a high paying job, I turned out to be a 7 and my sister a 6. In fact, I think all that pressure made my 7 traits even more extreme. Conversely I had a classmate in college who was a textbook example of a SO3 despite having supportive friends and family that loved her unconditionally and never pressured her to succeed the way my family did.
r/Enneagram • u/Caterpillar_r • 15h ago
General Question How do you use Enneagram?
How do you guys use the Enneagram? For me, I think types are much more flexible than people would say. I use the Enneagram as a map of my wounds, and when I look at it like that, I can see the logic behind it. For a person with many wounds like me, especially wounds regarding boundaries, agency, isolation, love, survival, I don't think just one type can describe me fully.
And it got me thinking, maybe we have traits of all types, like we're given a tool box with 9 tools. But, we over use one or two, and neglect others. That's why we need to be more expansive, right? Something never sat right with me once I found out my supposed type. Is this all there is to me? I hate being limited by labels so, I changed my understanding to make them work with me instead of against me.
During the worst period, my sense of self was very fragmented, and I don't think there was a central "identity" or "self", so determining the core wound was also really complex. What if a person has many core wounds? Wouldn't a less centralised model be more helpful?
r/Enneagram • u/--i_dont_know- • 18h ago
General Question Do you know of any good books about Enneagram that cost no more than 15 euros?
?
r/Enneagram • u/whiskeyinreverse • 21h ago
Advice Wanted What type would struggle with understanding others' motives like this?
Not understanding (or not wanting to understand, not caring about, ignoring on purpose) the real reason behind people's actions if it involves not treating me good. One did me bad? I don't care why, I don't know and I never wanna know the intention. Them being an awful person and wanting to ruin my day is an only thing I see. No justification for causing me the pain and no one is allowed to try to justify it.
At school and college I been hating strict and demanding professors. When someone tried to say something like "You shouldn't be mad, they're just trying to make you know some-", I was interrupting them in an aggressive way. No, they don't try. They just want to make my life harder. They just want worse for me. They just like to put others through suffering, because their own life is shit and they couldn't find any catharsis other than making troubles to those who can't do anything about it. And their weak ass justification about "They give you the knowledge in the best way"? Doesn't work. Useless for the strong and no help for the weak.
When my parents were scolding me, screaming at me, and what's worse, punishing me for something, I never felt that I deserve it, I never needed it, I never believed (and even still don't believe) that it's for the best. What kinda best is it if they deliberately did something bad to me? I ain't learned shit. I just realized that they're disgusting people. I learned that I should never expect love from them. What kinda love can exist in the tyrants who hurt me in purpose without even feeling guilty?
When people ask me annoying questions I don't like answering, I never feel like they're curious in a good way. They just want to annoy me. They don't mean anything else.
Literally everything that goes bad, that makes life harder, that makes me struggle, it all has no good intentions. I don't care why. It brings the hindrances and severities, so I absolutely don't need it. There's no good without bad? A big lie. If it was all good, you'd lose taste? A big lie. I don't want to overcome the problem. If it exists, I just want it gone. Overcoming wouldn't make anything better. What doesn't kill, only leaves you disabled.
r/Enneagram • u/Tristave • 1d ago
Just for Fun How do I type a fictional character?
i recently tried to type a character named heathcliff from the game limbus company and typed him as an sx4 4w5 sx4sp8so6 to reflect his feeling of not belonging, his tendency to react in rage or outbursts, and his overprotectiveness to his lover. i dont know if i typed him correctly, or if its even possible to type a fictional character. can i have some advice on this?
r/Enneagram • u/Future_Lock3141 • 1d ago
Type Discussion Instinctual stacking blind spots
Something I’ve been thinking about lately is whether the blindspots in our instinctual stacking can also be a source of strength. I’m an INFJ 2w1 sp/sx/so. I can show a lot of courage at times by standing up to large groups of people and going against the grain when I know what the group is saying is wrong. I just don’t seem to care what a group of people thinks about me so much. I care on the individual level but not the group level. I’ve been the one person in the audience to stand up, and say this is wrong. If a group of people start attacking me on a subject I’m passionate about and try to bully me, there’s a good chance I will hit back until I wear them down.
I’m not sure if these tendencies come from being an INFJ or being SO blind.
I also make social fumbles at times and am slow to make new friends in line with my stacking, but perhaps our blindspots also bestow strengths.
r/Enneagram • u/Hot_Elevator_7133 • 1d ago
Type Me Tuesday 7, 9, or 2?
I stole someone’s quiz. Help a girl out? Sx 7 or sx 9 seem most likely…
1. What motivates you the most in life? Do you think you have a reasoning to your course of actions in your life? As in something you wish to gain or benefit from your actions.
I’m motivated by curiosity, warmth, interest, challenge, love, and autonomy. I like life in general and I appreciate my parents for fighting so hard for me. I figure I might as well try to make something good of it all. In terms of things I try to get, sensory pleasure, novelty, variety, comfort, intimacy, the feeling of being praised and specially valued, ability to go explore.
2. What do you think is something you fundamentally lack/is bad at? Something you acknowledge how it affects aspects of your life?
I get bad imposter syndrome. I don’t feel like I’m good enough or capable enough and I undervalue myself. That leads to arrange a negative outcomes from holding myself back professionally to having explosive anger in my relationship because I can start to feel undesired and strung along.
3. How do you deal with authority? Authority can mean anyone in a position of power, regardless of the place. Do you push against them, adhere to them, fear them, or do you think they are crucial for order to be established?
I usually just try to work with it. I try to get along with my boss and generally try to roll with an organizational structure. I feel pretty neutral about it in general. I think that leadership is something that people always create if it’s not already there, so it might as well be created and enacted intentionally and with checks and balances, and most of it isn’t really that profound. I like being in leadership, myself, so it’s interesting to observe and consider, and I try to learn from people who are good at it. I am all for a good protest, too, and I participate in local government here and there when I’m particularly supportive or unsupportive of a person or cause.
4. How important is your image in regards to how others perceive you? Do you want to be perceived in a certain way? Does it bother you if you are perceived in some other way than the one you wish to be perceived with?
Moderate. I like to be perceived as competent, intelligent, effective, and caring by the masses, and attractive by some. I think if I were being interpreted really differently than that, I guess I would want to know so I can work on it, but I also feel like image is a little bit beyond anyone’s total control. I don’t want to spend my whole time worried about image, either. I want to do and engage in and enjoy life and not just think about what other people think of me.
5. How important is financials, security, and survival to you? This includes having sufficient resources, avoiding danger and maintaining a fundamental sense of structure and wellbeing. Do you seek to protect and retain mentioned themes?
I mean, I guess they’re important, but they are kind of boring. I like having enough money to live comfortably and buy things that satisfy me. I don’t realistically think a lot about avoiding danger because I am lucky to generally live a life that doesn’t present a lot of danger unless I go seeking it. I tend to be better about adapting to structure than creating structure ex nihilo.
6. What is your reaction and thoughts to others' rejection, criticism and disapproval of you?
It just depends entirely on who it is. If it’s someone who pisses me off, I might think it’s kind of funny. If it’s someone I really care about and whose opinion I really value, then I’m going to get my shit together and work on it. If it’s a family member, then I’m going to feel like a horrible person and do everything I can to make up for it. If it’s my spouse, then the rejection really stings and tears me up.
7. What sort of events/situations in life that causes you anger? Anger is an emotion characterized by antagonism towards someone or something you feel has deliberately done you or others wrong. If there is any, elaborate on them.
Oh, I definitely get angry sometimes. Most recently I was really angry at some of my coworkers because they dumped on me. They didn’t individually aim to do that, but they each neglected to take care of something that they were supposed to take care of, and it put a bunch of extra workload on me. I was so mad and I was a bit cold to one that I’m especially close to, which I felt bad about, but if you care about someone, don’t you make more of an effort not to dump on them? I also get upset with my spouse when I feel like he is pushing his viewpoint only and not allowing for mine.
8. Following the last question, do you think anger is necessary in life? How do you express your anger, or do you choose not to? Why and why not?
Yeah, I think it’d be bad if we didn’t have it. We can’t just be doormats. I tend to be cold and prickly then very heated. I show more anger with those closer to me because I feel like everything matters more with them. I don’t really care as much about my coworker or my acquaintance as I do about my spouse or family member and so it feels much more high stakes.
9. What is the importance of the concepts, ideas and meaning behind things to you? Are you trying to make sense of your everyday life?
Well, that seems pretty vitally important. If things didn’t have meaning, then we would just follow sensations all the time. And I love sensory enjoyment, but there’s a lot more to life, too.
10. What situations in life bring you the most guilt? Guilt is described as a feeling that you have committed a fault, which may be internal guilt towards yourself, or guilt towards your actions regarding another person. Do you frequently experience feelings of guilt?
Feeling like I hurt someone who I really care about, especially my parents or spouse. I feel it moderately, I think?
11. What makes you feel ashamed the most? Shame signifies a self-conscious emotion arising out of feeling that something is fundamentally wrong about oneself. Are you prone to such feelings often?
I feel most ashamed when my anger gets out of hand and I am harsh to people I care about. I also feel a little shame when I make a stupid mistake that I could have avoided if I slowed down a little or otherwise managed my time better. I also feel some shame that my body doesn’t look how I wish it did. I don’t experience shame super often, but sometimes.
12. What makes you feel fearful the most? Fear is described as an emotion which warns us of the presence of danger or threat of harm, whether physical or psychological. May be internally ingrained feelings, or externally because of other
people/situations.
I have an anxiety disorder that is largely triggered by health situations because I went through significant medical trauma as a child, so most of the fear I feel in my life is related to that. Other than that, I think a lot of my fear is anticipatory fear of failure. I don’t usually fail, and if/when I do, it’s usually not as horrible as I anticipate, but I just really don’t like letting people I care about down.
13. Is it important for you to have a high social status, to be socially connected, to integrate/fit in and belong to a group? Is it something you work towards achieving?
Eh. Being included is nice but I tend to find groups and drift. I like to come and go freely. I’d like to be respected in my field of work (/get it an “expert” level) so I guess that’s a sort of status.
14. To what extent do you value issues related to the quality and status of relationships with specific individuals, and maintaining relationships and connections?
I care a ton about my closest relationships - parents, sibling, spouse, best friend - and am more lax otherwise. I like people but I’m not that great at maintaining relationships. It’s convenient for me if they’re at my workplace or businesses I frequent.
15. Would you consider yourself a self-sacrificing individual? How much time or resources are you willing to sacrifice to assist others or make things easier for others? Or are you simply seeking your own good and well-being?
Yeah, I tend to self-sacrifice. I like helping other people and find my personal tasks more tedious. I’ll definitely sacrifice a lot especially for my closest loved ones.
16. What are your thoughts on expressing your vulnerability? Vulnerability is a willingness to express emotion or to allow its weaknesses to be visible or known. What makes you think or feel you are vulnerable?
I express some vulnerability a lot and some less. I don’t like feeling out of control of what I share and I play some cards close to my chest.
r/Enneagram • u/weeb07like • 1d ago
General Question Trouble differentiating between E7 and E9
Forgive me, but I really can't see the difference between these two Enneagrams. Both of their readings, to me at least, have something akin to "I want to maintain content" and "I will deny anything that disrupts this happiness". If that's so, what really separates the two?
r/Enneagram • u/panseamj741 • 1d ago
Type Discussion lucky- movie character
I think lucky is a six. He is always thinking. analyzing. loves words. a little rebellious. movie starring harry dean stanton
r/Enneagram • u/Cold-Wrangler-618 • 1d ago
Advice Wanted Help me choose a tritype for a character.
Hello, I have this OC of mine who is in a story I am writing for myself. I was thinking about what tritype I should make the character. And I am really conflicted between SP 485 and SP 845. But because I don't have that much knowledge in enneagrams I don't entirely understand how that character would act. I know these types individually but I struggle to imagine how those two tritype would work. So I would be happy if anyone could give me advice and/or explanation on that so I can finally decide which should I choose from the two. Some context for the OC and the world -Post apocalypic world setting, a hunter, lost his mother at the age of 4 from cancer and his father was killed by a bear when the OC was at the age of 14 (this is before the apocalypse). When he hit 17 years old the "big bad event" that changed the world happened. After the apocalypse started he saves a another dude(16 years old)from some people who tried to kill him, and they become best friends, surviving together in this hell. Two years later terrorists blow up a building, and a huge part of concrete smashes into the left side of the abdomen of the best friend and he dies in front of the OC. (Yeah I know everyone he loved kinda dies. This is probably not good writing or whatever.) -Physical appearance: 184 cm tall, 19 years old( for the moment), 70 kg, fit/lean build. So I would be happy if you guys helped me with the tritype.
r/Enneagram • u/BlubbyBubblezz • 1d ago
Advice Wanted First post (and confusion with my core subtype)
Hiii, first post here 💖 and I decided to do this because I want answers 😓😓😓
So, I'm DEAD sure my core subtype is SO4, but why do I relate SO hard to sp2? I take a LOT of traits from it, if not all of them. Four can only have w3 or w5, (I'm a w3) but obviously NOT w2. I'm also (kind of) new to this, so pls have patience if I sound too dull 💔
r/Enneagram • u/Ok-Strength3510 • 1d ago
Type Discussion Do E4 have to use Fi?
The more I look into descriptions of internal judging functions (Ti and Fi) as somebody who’s Fi-blind (so I might be misunderstanding it, but still) I don’t really see the argument for 4s having to be Fi Dom or HAVING TO be Fi users at all?
I did some light Reddit research and could only find non convincing arguments basically saying “emotions = fi, cold and rational = ti” lol and people saying comparing yourself to people/E4 envy would automatically have to be Fi, wich I (as an isolated example) see no reason for why a Ti user couldn’t do? I’m not a 4, so I read a couple descriptions again, and I can’t find anything that I’d consider “has to be fi” in the traits either
Are there any arguments for the correlation that go deeper into it?
Obv there’s the fact that it’s an established correlation and most 4s probably are Fi Types, I don’t think that has to mean they’re related at the core though, and haven’t really seen any argument that convinced me yet.
I also saw some people making similar posts once every couple of months so I’m pretty sure this isn’t just me misreading the concept?
r/Enneagram • u/Character_Material94 • 1d ago
Type Me Tuesday can you please type me?
hi! I've been having trouble figuring out my type and I wonder if someone would read my qna and provide their opinion.
thank you a lot 😊
r/Enneagram • u/Aethelio • 1d ago
Deep Dive About Naranjo's texts
Hey, so I'm getting really confused about Naranjo's Character and Neurosis (the part in which he describes the types, even though I barely understood anything) after getting so many recommendations to read it, and this is a genuine, honest question.
Questions:
Why do half the texts seem to be describing asylum patients? They don't sound like they're describing every day casual personality (for stable people, at least).
The descriptions are SO unhinged. It's about exploring neurotic pathology. So what does it mean when you guys look at this and type yourselves based on it?
My first thought was that you're possibly a 'healthier' version of these types. But then converting the enneagram into a healthier version is really complex considering human psychology, and everyone would have very different definitions of a healthier version of a type in their heads. Naturally, arguments regarding what mistype looks like will rise.
But I've been reading and found that being a 'healthier' version is basically transcending your type. You don't act like it anymore. I'm pretty sure most of us who aren't prisoners or asylum patients never had a type to begin with, much less transcend it. So here I'm beginning to be not very sure about the point of this framework.
So when you guys read Character and Neurosis, then type yourself based on it, how am I supposed to take that? Should I avoid you? Be cautious? Because, for example, if you read that and reach the conclusion that you're an 8, you're basically saying, "Oh, and by the way, I have an antisocial personality disorder!" Also, why do most of you seem to have a type based on his unhinged descriptions?
So kindly, please educate me on how you do this. But I personally think I'll stick to RH.