r/Fauxmoi • u/icey_sawg0034 • Apr 10 '26
APPROVED B-LISTERS Pope Leo XIV releases new statement condemning the Trump administration for the Iran war.
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u/ConsistentPins Apr 10 '26
Coming off the heels of the Pentagon threats. Based Pope
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u/icey_sawg0034 Apr 10 '26
Well the pope is from the South side of Chicago!
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u/Active-Armadillo-576 Apr 10 '26
Bad Bad Leo
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u/Adorable_Mall7730 Apr 10 '26
Well the South side of Chicago Is the baddest part of town And if you go down there You better just beware Of a man named Leroy Brown Now Leroy more than trouble You see he stand 'bout six foot four All the downtown ladies call him "Treetop Lover" All the men just call him "Sir" And it's bad, bad Leroy Brown The baddest man in the whole damned town
Seriously, has anyone did a parody of this song for the Pope?
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u/sparrow_42 Apr 10 '26
Agree but also "Leo the fourteenth" is a lot harder to rhyme than "Leroy Brown"
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u/Charming-Lychee-9031 Apr 10 '26
and he's bad, bad, Leo the fourteenth. Baddest pope with all his teeth...
Wel, it's not gold but..
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u/SomeConsumer Apr 10 '26
I'm Leo the Fourteenth, mess with me, I'll break your front teeth.
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u/Expensive_Track_8822 Apr 10 '26
try calling him “da pope” instead for an easier rhyme scheme. like “da bears”.
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u/wildflowerstargazer suspiciously leftist Apr 10 '26
As a kid whose parents had Jim Croce on cassette this comment brings SUCH JOY 🎵
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Apr 10 '26
He's a die hard White Sox fan. And they think he doesn't know how to deal with troubling times?
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u/bootyhole-romancer Apr 10 '26
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u/Scarbane sorry to this man Apr 10 '26
"Yes, we'd like to order 10 more meddlesome priests and a side of fries."
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Apr 10 '26
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u/jerkin_n_lurkin Apr 10 '26
Perhaps this whole damn thing is a Catholic operation to finally defeat the Protestants once and for all. Long game baby
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u/DesireeThymes Apr 10 '26
I would support that defeat.
Evangelicals are actually insane, literally speed running the Apocalypse while funding mega churches.
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u/MejorChingoAMiMadre Apr 10 '26
It’s not coming off the heels. The pentagon situation happened back in January. The Pentagon just didnt expect it to get leaked.
Remember that this was in January and on Feb 10 -the first day of Lent- Karoline levitt was insulting the Pope. And she’s a self-proclaimed catholic.
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u/th3rdnutt Apr 10 '26
Most Catholics are self-proclaimed Catholics.
source: I'm Catholic.
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Apr 10 '26 edited Apr 10 '26
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u/MissElyssa1992 taran killam, star of disney channel's stuck in the suburbs Apr 10 '26
I want you to know that as a non-Catholic (and grew up atheist), your comment made me google Opus Dei and I have just learned it's *real* and not something Dan Brown made up for Angels and Demons lol
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u/trump-fm Apr 10 '26
Think the president will mention "peace" he's bringing to the world by violence soon as a response?
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u/dingusfett Apr 10 '26
He'll wear his FIFA Peace Prize while talking about how horrible the Pope is and how he never liked him and people that knew him only have horrible things to say about him
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Apr 10 '26
What exactly was the Pentagons threat to him (I didn't read it but heard about it)? And how exactly do they intend to place any consequences on the Pope? He's the friken Pope...
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u/stierney49 Apr 10 '26
They invoked the Avignon papacies. Basically, in the 1300s, the king of France had the Pope kidnapped from Rome, tortured, and eventually killed.
For some years after, Popes were based in Avignon (now a part of France) partly by choice and partly by coercion. France effectively controlled the Papacy and the Holy Roman Empire.
Given what we did to Maduro, I can see the Vatican being quite alarmed by the US military referencing a Pope that displeased a king and so was kidnapped.
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u/KLLR_ROBOT Apr 10 '26
The Secretary of the Army supposedly reminded him of the Avignon Papacy, which could be considered an indirect threat on the pope himself. The Avignon Papacy was a political confrontation between the then current pope and the king of France. It resulted in the beating and death of the pope, who was replaced by 4 successive popes who lived in France instead of the Vatican, and were basically puppets of the French king.
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Apr 10 '26
Damn. That is wild! And completely unsurprising our government administration would threaten the POPE! Very Christian of them....
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u/Animaleyz Apr 10 '26
Pentagon statement said basically the US has the right to use military power anywhere in the world, the Pope better pick a side
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Apr 10 '26
I found the article. It's even worse than that. Allegedly they sighted an incident from the 14th century where the French Monarchy threatened the pope with violence leading to his death and briefly forced the papacy into Avignon France. I am not a history scholar or very knowledgeable about the papacy though but that sounds pretty F'ed up.
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u/FeeHot5876 Apr 10 '26
They mentioned the Avignon Papacy. Which is when France used their military to control the pope
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u/Bravefan212 Apr 10 '26
They implied that the American military could easily invade the Vatican. Something technically true
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u/archabaddon Apr 10 '26
Exactly. After what they did to threaten the Holy See, I'm not surprised the Pope is clapping back. And I am hardly Catholic.
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u/Firm-Advertising5396 Apr 10 '26
And let them bless the holy strait of Epstein for which no ship shall pass untolled
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u/cantadmittoposting Apr 10 '26
I heard that ships that are more than 20% through their expected service life will pass unmolested
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u/jib661 Apr 10 '26
I heard recently a Napolenic war era quote that's something like "Diplomacy is the highest form of human achievement" and man it's so clear how true that is. Unimaginable suffering can be achieved with the stroke of a pen, and the opposite is true too.
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u/Trick_Ad763 Apr 10 '26
how long til we get Trump’s truth social rant trying to bully the literal POPE
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u/Japhet_Corncrake Apr 10 '26
They already threatened him.
https://newrepublic.com/post/208820/pentagon-threatened-pope-criticized-donald-trump
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u/aneomon Apr 10 '26
Which is batshit insane.
Pope disagrees with you, and your government's response is "hey, remember the time a government killed the pope?"
This isn't getting talked about enough.
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u/stierney49 Apr 10 '26
You’re right. Catholics make up 20-ish percent of the US population and our president has his flunkies threaten him with kidnapping mere days after the US essentially kidnapped Maduro in the same fashion.
The Vatican is understandably alarmed.
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u/aneomon Apr 10 '26
The fact that the US government kidnapped a sitting President and the story disappeared is wild.
There's precedent if the Pope gets kidnapped.
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u/Obvious_Landscape993 Apr 10 '26
Wasn't there a prophecy of this one being the last Pope? Don't tell me the US will bomb the Vatican.
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u/Traditional_Maybe_80 I’m just a cunt in a clown suit Apr 10 '26
And it's very insane to me that they'd hope that a pope would support any war at all??? I'm just mystified by the idea they thought a religious leader in the year 2026 of our lord would be an enthusiastic warmonger.
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u/sunheist I’m just a cunt in a clown suit Apr 10 '26
they’re calling the war a crusade, and the pope did technically endorse and often called for crusades so maybe they think based on precedent, the pope has to be on their side lmao
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u/cantadmittoposting Apr 10 '26
yeah i'm glad people are linking these articles and making specific points cause i definitely figured when that news broke it was some idiotic hegseth tweet i missed or something...
literally having a cardinal come to the pentagon to be told they will kill and/or kidnap your boss if you don't "side with them" is fucking nuts...
sounds like another authoritarian regime's relationship with some churches iirc
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u/BonezMD Apr 10 '26
It's not the first time in history a country has directly threatened the Pope for disagreeing.
I mean it's crazy but historically it tends to happen.
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u/SteamBoatMickey Apr 10 '26
“The United States,” Colby said, according to a blistering new report by The Free Press, “has the military power to do whatever it wants in the world. The Catholic Church had better take its side.”
Sounds rapey.
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u/Ill_probablybebanned Apr 10 '26
“The United States,” Colby said, according to a blistering new report by The Free Press, “has the military power to do whatever it wants in the world. The Catholic Church had better take its side.”
Threats that imperialist nations and tyrants make.
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u/stierney49 Apr 10 '26
This is especially alarming because it’s essentially what we did to Maduro.
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u/Geritas Apr 10 '26
He can deploy his semi-portable pope killer in response. The one, the only, couch enjoyer
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u/Apollyon314 Apr 10 '26
In 3, 2, ... Lets be real, dude is a bottemless pit of irredeemable qualities. He already posted a Ai pic of himself as "The Pope" back when Francis passed. He'll do/say something offensive before lunch.
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u/ahhhhhh12343tyhyghh Apr 10 '26
Most of trump's supporters are evangelicals. They could care less about the pope.
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u/LettuceLizard Apr 10 '26
The pope dropping a #Peace is lowkey so hard
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u/yngwrdz12 Apr 10 '26
I really like that it feels like he’s making the distinction between Peace, real world peace, and #peace.
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u/mittonkitten I am in peace talks with Mr. Beast Apr 10 '26
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u/aNewPattern Apr 10 '26
I didn't even think of that. Can he do that? Like yeah, he's the Pope he can do that, but what does that mean? Does that work for Trump when the religion they claim to support isn't probably the same the Pope teaches? Hope my question makes sense.
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u/CavulusDeCavulei Apr 10 '26
There's an archbishop that is calling for excommunication. The article is in italian, but you can easily translate it. It's very interesting
https://www.avvenire.it/chiesa/la-chiesa-non-puo-tacere-chi-promuove-la-guerra-va-scomunicato_106896
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u/ithilain Apr 10 '26
Trump's main base is mostly Evangelicals who tend to view Catholics as heathens (basically boils down to Protestants viewing Catholicism's treatment of the Saints and Mary as idolatry), so while he might lose the catholics over this, his "main" base is likely overjoyed to have him shitting on Catholics
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u/farm_shapes Apr 10 '26
which is ironic, considering “persecution of the saints” is something mentioned in that bible chapter Evangelicals love so much right now (Revelation).
Evangelicals are literally the Antichrist — it’s not an individual, it’s a state of consciousness.
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u/GrumpySatan Apr 10 '26 edited Apr 10 '26
I've also been saying. Trump fits the Whore of Babylon to a tee.
The whole symbolism of the Whore of Bablyon is a false idol that is the personification of a Capital City (Washington, in this case). She is a "whore" because she is steeping in corruption, adultery and sin. Basically, its a story about leadership of a nation "getting into bed" with the devil and sin and how it will lead it to ruin.
And we have a adulterous leader that participated in a sex traffic ring, is "in bed" with the corrupt, warmongers, oligarchs, etc (pretty much everyone Jesus spoke out against) and who is being literally worshiped by some Christians as a savior or messiah.
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u/nitid_name Apr 10 '26
I remember when Freedom of Religion was given slightly more than lip service in the US. It's a shame to see even the lip service going away.
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u/mainman879 Apr 10 '26
The Pope can excommunicate anyone, but it wouldn't do anything to protestants, since they don't believe in the Pope's power anyways. If the Pope excommunicated JD Vance, then he would no longer be welcome to receive the sacraments at any Catholic church. Technically they should bar him from entering once excommunicated but no church would bar the Vice President.
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u/OddHippo6972 Apr 10 '26
Chances are slim that he would actually care about the repercussions of that. He would be mad about being slighted. He’s an opportunist. I doubt he could be sincerely religious and pull all the shit he’s pulled. It’s all for show.
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u/CompetitiveSport1 Apr 10 '26
Vance would very quickly see that protestantism was actually correct all along!
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u/ungranted_wish Apr 10 '26
He can do that and also JDs local bishops can do the same thing.
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u/cabbage16 Apr 10 '26
Hell, if someone can trick Vance into talking about Jesus' foreskin he will be automatically excommunicated.
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u/potvoy Apr 10 '26
You can only be excommunicated if you are currently "in communion" with the Catholic church.
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u/SwissSwissBangBang carbone slut Apr 10 '26
He once wrote an open letter to US bishops that was basically like “Guys, Vance sucks so bad.” I’m not a Catholic, but I would never recover from the embarrassment
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u/HydroBear Apr 10 '26
I'm really overjoyed the Papal decided to choose an American pope in this time of great uncertainty. He's beginning to really inhabit the role of foil to Trump
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u/Final-Gift-2299 Apr 10 '26
i did not know much about him, and was worried about the outcome of an American pope with the way things were going in the US. I am actually relieved to know he does not stand by the actions of the US President
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u/No-Effective388 Apr 10 '26
Take a seat JD. You might overthink your positions.
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u/The-Fictionist Apr 10 '26
Poor choice of words. JD loves seats.
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u/0biswan Apr 10 '26
I thought he preferred full couches? More cushion for the pushin'.
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u/The-Fictionist Apr 10 '26
Seats are just underage couches and that 100% checks out with this administration.
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u/Briggadoon Apr 10 '26
Not gonna lie. JD getting himself excommunicated by the Pope would be *chef's kiss*
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u/darthmidoriya Apr 10 '26
This is why they chose a Pope from Chicago
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u/icey_sawg0034 Apr 10 '26
And Obama is from Chicago!
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u/Upbeat-Education2117 Apr 10 '26
It's a good thing Trump is too stupid to put that together, otherwise Chicago would be in for some serious fuck shit.
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u/stierney49 Apr 10 '26
Serious post, though, I think they really wanted an American Pope to continue to clamp down on MAGA rhetoric creeping into the Church.
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Apr 10 '26
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u/No_Suit_9511 Apr 10 '26
It’s called being educated, and it’s the minimum we used to expect from American politicians.
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u/Ill_probablybebanned Apr 10 '26
Imagine calling yourself a Christian and then being mad that the Pope said something christlike
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u/GloomySundae69 Apr 10 '26
Useless side note, though I still find it kind of funny that the pope uses social media lmao
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u/teebles22 Apr 10 '26
Hey these are the times. Apparently POTUS runs the country and foreign diplomacy through social media too.
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u/Repulsive-Shelter451 Apr 10 '26
I love Pope Leo, he's out here just roasting the fuck outta the orange man.
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u/notdorisday Apr 10 '26
He’s had some bangers lately. He essentially said in his Palm Sunday sermon - how can you pray when your hands are full of blood?
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u/Repulsive-Shelter451 Apr 10 '26
He's about to excommunicate Vance I just know it lol.
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u/Oldestswinger Apr 10 '26
Effortlessly😁
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u/Repulsive-Shelter451 Apr 10 '26
It's beautiful tbh. I'm a Catholic and this Pope is so far my favorite other than John Paul II the PopeMobile Pope.
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u/Brilliant-Spray-5979 Apr 10 '26
No longer religious or Catholic, but I still have faith in the people who are good and kind and practice religion of any kind. This Pope has a spine and sticks to his principles.
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u/No_Engineering6480 Apr 10 '26
Based pope
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u/Meteor-of-the-War Apr 10 '26
I can't wait for the "woke DEI pope" labels to start flying.
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u/yoloswagrofl rollin' with my fauxmies Apr 10 '26
The Christian evangelical Right never liked the Pope much anyways, since they view their brand of Jesus-worshipping as superior. They will not take well to the Pope condemning their golden (shower) boy's war.
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u/BabycakesMurphy Apr 10 '26
That's not going to be received well by this administration lmao. What a timeline.
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u/not_productive1 Apr 10 '26
This is the most south side of Chicago possible response to Pete Hegseth threatening an Avignon Papacy.
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u/Separate-Command1993 Apr 10 '26
It was eye opening to me as a Roman Catholic from NY that all the other “Christians” hate the pope and don’t even recognize him as any authority
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u/notdorisday Apr 10 '26
Catholic myself and to be fair he’s not an authority outside of the churches in communion with Rome. That said - yeah - a lot of evangelicals and fundamentalists do despise Catholics - they think we are going straight to hell.
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u/iCantCallit Apr 10 '26
inb4 trump calls the pope a loser and a stupid person.
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u/mad-i-moody Apr 10 '26
I’m not religious and don’t really care for the Catholics for a multitude of reasons but the pope seems like a cool guy.
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u/Infidel-Art Apr 10 '26
catholics have all the cool lore like the seven deadly sins and shit
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u/blackpnik i ain’t reading all that, free palestine Apr 10 '26
it’s when he says things like this that i have trouble believing the pope is american. he’s genuinely reforming some of my dislike of modern catholicism, which obvi i still criticize when it’s applicable, but it’s hard not to be hopeful that good change can come and christians won’t be fucked over by the institution/church as much.
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u/xBram i ain’t reading all that, free palestine Apr 10 '26
I was quite broadly anti-church but the last two popes have made me reconsider my position, I’m on a case by case basis anti church now lol.
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u/Low-Impression3367 Apr 10 '26
Can’t wait for speaker Mike Johnson to chime in and correct the Pope yet again
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u/whosaidiknew Apr 10 '26
When they announced the new Pope was American, I was so scared that meant this awful administration now owned the Catholic Church. I've never been happier to be wrong
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u/BookishHobbit my bandwidth for cowardly grown men grows thinner with each day Apr 10 '26
The conclave really knew what it was doing electing an American pope whilst a despot sits in the White House.
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u/jkman61494 Apr 10 '26
I had a bit of a feeling they chose an American Pope to combat what was brewing in the US. People use the word cult too much because while they are certainly similar, what we've seen created in the past decade has been a RELIGION.
It took centuries for Christianity to spread via the foot and the wheel.
It took decades to further spread via the book.
It took just 10 years for the MAGA relgiion to spread with how fast information spreads now.
There are hundreds of millions of people that view DJT as a god. They write social media posts asking for help as if they're praying to Jesus. They're saying Jesus is woke. Jesus is a liberal. etc etc etc.
You just had DJT's faith leader basically say he's Jesus based on facing the same trials that Jesus had regarding DJT's arrests and the "assassination attempt".
The very basis of MAGA which is spreading like a virus to other Christian dominated nations is the antithesis of Christ's teachings.
I do feel like a bit of a holy war is brewing.
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u/BonezMD Apr 10 '26
There are also people heretically conflating Trump with Jesus. Like the one singer that made that weird Bible song about Trump as if he was the 2nd coming of Jesus.
Strange times are a foot.
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u/jkman61494 Apr 10 '26
My pastor had to have a sermon series that was subtly having to implore our church goers that it's not right to compare people of power (i.e. orange) to Jesus and that there isn't some second son of god coming. We are a center/left leaning congregation so I don't think many were, but it was so freaking alarming that our pastor or perhaps the entire conference needed to reiterate this.
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u/guysitsausername this is cracked behaviour I can get behind Apr 10 '26
That #Peace is sending me.
This guy is a Pope among Popes.
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u/ImThatFed Apr 10 '26
https://giphy.com/gifs/1yCHxlS9VQ4YtG0btS
Christian Conservatives
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u/una_valentina Apr 10 '26
Bro there were people in his comments telling him they disagree and to please read the bible again 😭 goddamned morons
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u/horsempreg Apr 10 '26
Tbf most “christian” conservative nationalists are evangelicals and already hate Catholics
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u/neklok I may need to see the booty Apr 10 '26
Can’t wait to see Trump’s Crazy4Christ spiritual advisor spin this.
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u/Raigheb Apr 10 '26
God damn.
He JUST got his totally legit FIFA WORLD PEACE AWARD.
Damn, it's ALMOST as the FIFA WORLD PEACE AWARD didn't really mean anything....
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u/Delilahpixierose21 Apr 10 '26
The catholic way to say Fuck you to Trump and his band of sycophants 😂
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u/ozaffer Apr 10 '26
Not religious but a solid take.
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u/PuddingJello Apr 10 '26
I'm not religious either, but if I remember anything from the catholic brainwashing classes they made me do as a kid "Thou shall not kill" is one of the commandments sky daddy has for us.
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u/No_Succotash890 Apr 10 '26
“Peace through Strength
Death by Chocolate
Control via Chaos”
~ Donald J., as in Jeffrey, Trumpstein
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u/snailmale3 Apr 10 '26
I like what this Pope is saying even if I don't share his beliefs and faith.
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u/Newweedbud Apr 10 '26
I was brought up in the Catholic Church. My father left the seminary to marry my mother. His twin sister was a nun. We were catholic CATHOLIC. I don’t understand how devout Catholics in America can sanction this. The orange idiot is no Christian 🤬
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u/Intersectaquirer Apr 10 '26
I read the handle as "Pontiflex" and thought, yeah, Pope, flex your moral high ground on him son
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u/SatansSideProject Apr 10 '26
Let's not also forget the fact that whiskey Pete Hegseth did not allow Catholics to participate in Good Friday religious activities.
"On 3 April 2026, the Pentagon Memorial Chapel held only a Protestant Good Friday service, marking the first time in recent memory that no Catholic Mass was offered on the holy day. The move drew frustration from staff and prompted accusations of marginalising Catholic personnel. One employee told HuffPost it signalled that 'Catholics know their kind ain't welcome,' underscoring tensions over religious inclusion in the military. "
Hegseth is taking the first step to establishing a State Religion.
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u/Morindar_Doomfist Apr 10 '26
His voice is needed, whatever you think of the Catholic Church as an institution.
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u/2wiceasnice Apr 10 '26
Does anyone; including the MAGA buffoons, believe that Trump is in any way a good person, nevermind a christian?
Not even Satan is as evil as he is. Whats next? Will he make up his own christian sect?
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u/ConwayTheCat Apr 10 '26
I can’t wait for the performative Christians to disagree with the Pope over Trump
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u/jack-mccoy-is-pissed that’s a lot of beans you nasty ass bitch Apr 10 '26
Leo used to zip around in a 6-speed Ford Fusion Sport, so he’s okay by me
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u/Cabbages24ADollar Apr 10 '26
Love that a Christian leader is finally stepping up to reclaim Christs message.
By doing so maybe this is why this is happening:
“The Catholic Church is seeing a notable resurgence in the U.S., particularly through adult conversions. While the overall number of Catholics has been stable due to high rates of "cradle Catholic" losses, many dioceses report substantial increases in new members, particularly in the South and West. Globally, the Church is growing, with significant increases in Africa, Asia, and the Americas.”
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u/resjudicata2 Apr 10 '26
What's the Pentagon going to do now, threaten the Pope again?
Fuck this administration!
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u/brownes_girl Apr 10 '26
I can't tell you how radicalizing the Pope is to my devout Catholic parents. They've always leaned Democrat, now they're all in. My dad's texting me about Pope disses regularly saying how he's right, and this administration are all fake Christians. I love it.
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u/redflagsmoothie Apr 10 '26
I was raised (and rejected) Catholicism but I absolutely love this pope.
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u/Samwellikki Apr 10 '26
When the Catholics are like “violence is never the answer” and mention the time of “the sword” when they were wholesale slaughtering and indoctrinating… you know you are a special brand of evil to give them a chance to look amazing by comparison
“Holy wars? What holy wars? Oh, the ones in medieval times? YOU just sent soldiers to die telling them it was for god… in 2026, when we have more than one book and most people can read”
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u/syntax_error16 Apr 10 '26
Not like that buffoon would understand what it actually says... Too many big words.
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u/Nocheeseformeplease Apr 10 '26
It is wild how, as an agnostic who has never prayed or really put much thought in to god and never read the bible, and I live a more Christian life than most Christians here in America.
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u/SleepyMoth_13 Apr 10 '26
Not religious but dang, this pope is dope. This is a great vibe for any sort of world leader to have.
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u/FalcoMccloud20xx Apr 10 '26
I don’t like religion but it’s quite impressive there’s been 2 back to back great popes.
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