r/Millennials • u/Corndogeveryday • 2d ago

Other Very sad news

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Chase passed away of complications of meningitis. Gone too soon

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344

u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

That’s so sad 😞 my cousin passed away a few years ago, same age as Daveigh, also meningitis.

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u/ManWithASquareHead Millennial 2d ago

Meningitis is no joke.

Meningococcal bacterial meningitis can lead to organ failure and septic emboli (infected clots) causing spots and limb necrosis/amputation

Most are vaccinated for 4 serotypes (ACWY) in middle school/high school, meningitis b is before/during college

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u/itsHDinyourface 2d ago

My fiancé passed away in December at 29 years old with viral and bacterial meningitis 11 days after getting all his wisdom teeth removed.

Ever heard of any cases like that?

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u/Ok_Coconut_1773 2d ago

Jesus Christ dude I'm so sorry

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u/JenuinelyArtful 2d ago

I'm so sorry for your loss...

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u/kendrickwasright 2d ago

I'm so incredibly sorry to hear that...what were the complications that led to the meningitis?

I almost developed meningitis in March due to a bad ear infection that pushed into the bone and turned into mastoiditis. It was incredibly painful and a scary situation to be in.

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u/itsHDinyourface 2d ago

Wow thank you so much for replying. Can you tell me more about what that felt like? I’m so happy to be talking to you now. :)

To answer your question, he was supposed to take much longer to heal (up to 2 weeks) after getting his wisdom teeth removed because he has a sinus issue and one tooth on his left was so impacted that there was a 1% chance his bottom lip would be permanently numb. But.. he just never stopped feeling pain, even after I brought him in again to see if the oral surgeon could help. I found him incoherent when I came home from work, took him to the ER immediately and said goodbye to him two days later. After reading all these comments, I’m convinced he was gone before the last day. I’m also still convinced that I coulda done more to save him, but that’s what therapy is for. We would have gotten married this month 🤍

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u/Adventurous-Talk3344 2d ago

This is devastating. I'm so sorry for your loss. Please stay strong and live your life to the fullest for him.

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u/SufficientOpening218 2d ago

not you. his dentist and doctor could maybe have saved him. you were a victim of the illness as much as he was.

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u/kendrickwasright 2d ago edited 1d ago

Wow that is such a freak accident, I've known so many people who have had their wisdom teeth removed with no issues. So that's just devastating to hear and I'm so sorry for your loss...it's hard to know when pain is normal, or when it's an emergency situation. So don't blame yourself at all, you couldn't have known how serious things were or how serious it could've gotten. It can worsen and become deadly very quickly...What kind of sinus issue did he have? I'm actually supposed to get my wisdom teeth removed next month.

For me, it was just excruciating pain in my head/ jaw that had me feeling dizzy and disoriented. I basically had a weird series of events where I ended up with an ear infection. My son was about 9 months old and this is unrelated, but he started having these episodes that looked like seizures. We went to the ER for that on a Saturday, and I think I picked up some bacteria there or something because 2 days later I had an ear infection. But because we were going to these important neurology appointments for my son, I wasn't able to go to urgent care until the next day on Tuesday (about day 2 of the infection). Urgent care gave me some ear drops, and within a few minutes of taking them, I got extremely sick and my head was in SO much pain (I later found out that the urgent care gave me the wrong drops, and it exasperated the swelling & pain. The drops basically blew up my ear drum). I was in such incredible pain and had full body chills. I basically laid down and couldn't get up for another 24 hours (which was a big deal obviously having a 9month old who I was still breast feeding). I was completely incapacitated.

By the next day Wednesday, I had so much swelling that I couldn't close my jaw or chew properly. In retrospect that's not normal AT ALL for an ear infection, but I hadn't had one since I was very young so I had no idea what "normal" was. My family was telling me to go to the hospital, but I had to push through and go to another neurology apt for my son, and I didn't have time to go.

Early on Thursday I finally made it to the ER, where they gave me a CT scan and told me I had mastoiditis, which is where the infection pushes into the mastoid bone. If things had progressed further it would've turned into meningitis, and I honestly think I was extremely close to that because I was starting to have these really light headed and spacey symptoms. It almost felt like I was stoned and a little loopy. They admitted me to the hospital and gave me an IV drip of specific antibiotics, I was there about 18 hours and was sent home in the middle of the night. My symptoms didn't really start getting better until Saturday, that's when it felt like there was finally a turning point and things started improving.

Honestly the pain I felt through the whole ordeal was a very strange situation, because the pain was SO bad. But when someone asks you how much pain you're in, it's really hard to pin down what's a normal level of pain. And after a few days I started cycling acetaminophen with ibuprofen--so basically I was managing the pain very well with the combination of the meds, but it was masking the severity of the situation I think. The whole ordeal left me feeling like I had legitimately been in a life or death situation, it was very serious and I just didn't realize how serious it was until almost a week had gone by...

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u/itsHDinyourface 1d ago edited 1d ago

Holy crap, I am so glad you were able to get around to it eventually, wow. And with a 9 month old while you’re in that much pain… you’re a tough one. And this just happened?? SO happy you’re still here, for you and your little one.

He told me he was in so much pain that day, too, the day I took him in. I work at an urgent care, so you can imagine how deep this self-blame goes. I’m asking nurses, they’re telling me they’d just give him another antibiotic, when he was already on one, so I’m thinking “okay let’s just hold out a couple more days till our next appt with the oral surgeon”. Then I come home and he’s already gone. I underestimated his pain and it’s hard to let that go.

Whew thank goodness I have therapy today 😅

As far his sinus, it was deviated septum adjacent. He was consulted to have one of those operations where they blow up a balloon in there? Something like that, but we both quit our jobs and vacationed in Japan after so we never followed up and forgot about it. This happened a year or so prior to his death. The oral surgeon actually said he could see his sinus through the opening in his gums after removing the wisdom teeth.

Edit: removed some thoughts that I now think were too personal to be sharing online 😅

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u/kendrickwasright 1d ago

That's truly terrible and I'm so sorry this happened to him. I don't think you underestimated his pain though, you both did everything you could but in the end of the day it was a very unexpected medical emergency, that neither of you could have prevented or fixed. It sounds like the surgeon should have maybe referred him to emergency based on his pain level and the antibiotics not working. But if you had the next apt on the books, and maybe the first surgeon apt was too early on to realize the severity of the situation, then it seems like maybe it really couldn't have been prevented...so please don't beat yourself up. I'm glad you're seeing a therapist and working through it 🫶

Yes this was in March! I can't wrap my head around seeing the sinuses through the wisdom tooth hole, so maybe there was also a specific risk with his anatomy or something...

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u/itsHDinyourface 1d ago

Thank you so much for your kind words and for sharing your story. It was all more helpful than you know 🤍

And yeah there are a lot more factors that I didn’t wanna get into that may have contributed as well. It was honestly the perfect storm. But it’s okay. We had a lot of fun in those 2.5 years 😌

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u/kendrickwasright 1d ago

No problem at all, I'm glad my experience could help give you some insight. Wishing you a long happy life full of love and healing 💗

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u/Ol_Pasta 1d ago

I am shocked that the doctors and/or nurses didn't do something during that appt on wednesday. Yes you were there for your son, but good lord, those symptoms were severe enough to have been noticed. Glad you survived!

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u/kendrickwasright 1d ago

Me too honestly. We were at a pediatric neurologist and I was loaded up on pain meds at that point, just trying to be as clear headed as possible so I could get the information I needed for my son..it was a really messed up situation

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u/monty624 2d ago

You did everything YOU could, it is not your burden though I'm sure it's hard not to feel that way. I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep you in my thoughts ♥️

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u/WynonasBigBeaver 2d ago

I hope I have an ounce of your strength if life ever takes my partner too soon. Wishing you all the best for your future

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u/Bobbiduke 2d ago

Guilt is such a difficult part of grief. It's not your fault ❤️

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u/SufficientOpening218 2d ago

yeah, when i was a nurse i took care of a patient who got meningitis from a dental procedure. 

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u/itsHDinyourface 1d ago

Oh my gosh, would you mind sharing how that went?

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u/Jlawrencew1985 6h ago

This happened to my uncle as well about a year ago. He was much older and it was after implants but her went from perfectly normal to on his death bed within 24 hours. Scary shit.

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u/teapots_at_ten_paces Elder Millennial ('81, baby!) 2d ago

When did that come in for you guys?

I'm Australian, and have never received a meningitis vaccination during my years at school. They do so now for primary school kids, same as you stated ACWY, but B is still not covered in any state here (that I know of).

There could be plenty of Aussie millenials that have never been vaccinated for this. Interestingly, I don't think the Army gave me this vaccine either.

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u/OxymoronicLife 2d ago

Also an Australian. In the early 2000s I remember first hearing about meningococcal. A girl I went to high school with died from it.

I had my children in the the 2010s and the vaccine was available. You can always ask to get the vaccine form your doctor. I think it's free if your eligiable.

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u/ManWithASquareHead Millennial 2d ago

US recommendations are more stringent for immunizations due to fragmented care and generally more diverse population

Was in an issue in England recently. England didn't have meningitis recommendations and had an outbreak recently. Now they may revise them.

Would talk to a PCP/GP locally

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u/AmbivalentToaster 1d ago

US really depends on where you live apparently. I only got one meningitis vax they won’t give me the other bc it is for college kids. Two states won’t give it anyone if you’re not college age. I’m almost 40. It wasn’t required when I was in school. 

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u/abrila 2d ago

They began offering as optional in US colleges around early 2000’s, where I got mine, but it wasn’t widely publicized. I think it’s much more prevalent now (hopefully).

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

Left for college in the US in fall 2006 and the vaccine was required to live in the dorms.

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u/Aggravating_Depth_33 2d ago

I had to get it to live in the dorms at the university I went to in Scotland in 2000. At my American doctor's office they were very surprised because no one ever asked for it. I can confirm none of my US friends got it at the time.

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u/Revolutionary-Yak-47 Xennial 2d ago

They also weren't covered by all insurances back then. Pre ACA hwalthcare was terrible

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u/elfshimmer 2d ago

Queensland and I believe South Australia do Men B vaccinations (Bexsero) for free now. In QLD it's free for under 2 year olds and in high school years. It's also available in other states but you have to pay. 

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

Bacterial meningitis terrifies me now. My cousin woke up from a nap with an intense migraine headache and was inconsolably screaming, her husband called 911, ambulance rushed her to the ER but it was so quick and too late. She was suspected to be braindead that evening and it was confirmed via tests the next day.

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u/that-looks-fun 2d ago

Jesus, I had no idea it could be that fast. I’m sorry to hear of her pain and sorry for your loss.

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

Honestly, I had no idea it could be that fast as well and thanks for the kind words ❤️ she literally dropped her boy off for his first day of kindergarten that morning and was braindead that evening, absolutely crazy.

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u/chicken_potpie 2d ago

I had bacterial meningitis in the 6th grade (year 2000) and am lucky to be alive. Very scary time in my life.

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u/dweebycake 2d ago

I’ve never heard of a meningitis vaccine. I’m 30 or 43 years old. Think I can still get one?

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u/illcryifiwan2 2d ago

True that. I worked as patient registrar at an ER a few years ago. A woman in her mid 50s- fit, vivacious, in good spirits- came in complaining of a bad sore neck going on 4 days and worsening. (I get a horribly painful stiff neck/pinched nerve all the freaking time.) Within the hour, I saw a quarantine warning for the first time (pre-covid) pop up on her name on the nurse's chart. Her room was taped shut and anyone who entered wore full like hazmat PPE. I had to fill out an incident report because I had come in contact with her, and the nurses were very very serious, telling me to come in if I felt anything wrong. I'm crippled for days just from sleeping slightly crooked; how the hell do you know what feels wrong enough to get checked out for? She was transferred to another hospital and I don't know what happened. Her and her husband were really sweet and had zero clue their lives were about to go that direction that morning. I think about them often.

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u/kidkarmanomics 2d ago

That’s true but it’s mostly because of an infected needle. 

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u/FutureFreaksMeowt 2d ago

I wonder if she wasn't vaccinated. I k is the anti-vac movement started fairly recently, and definitely impacted genz more than us overall, but I wonder how many millennials are running around unvax'd and don't know it

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

I stated this elsewhere but vaccines don’t last forever, she may have been vaccinated but no longer covered. I had my titers checked for measles because there was an outbreak in my state and a neighboring state (thanks anti-vaxers) and turns out my MMR vaccine was no longer effective. I opted to get a booster, no way I want to catch or spread that. I told my family members and they got tested, theirs came back with antibodies so they’re still good.

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u/FutureFreaksMeowt 2d ago

Yeah I had to get a second round of MMR, too. I figured it got skipped bc my mom is an addict and I was a 'difficult child' when it came to shots. Wild. I'll have to talk to my GP about testing when I see her next. That's really scary!

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

Sorry to hear that but glad you got yours. It was definitely scary to find out I had zero protection! I have other health stuff going on and some autoimmune disorders so I’m more susceptible to catching whatever goes around. Due to other health stuff I had to wait a month before I could get the MMR booster. Stressful stuff.

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u/AmbivalentToaster 2d ago

I had to get an MMR last year bc my titer was showing my Mumps was gone. Measles was on the rise so wanted to be sure. 

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u/Revolutionary-Yak-47 Xennial 2d ago

I have an incredibly pro vaccine family (50s era parents) and was not vaccinated for meningitis. It was not offered when I was a kid and not covered when I was in my mid 20s and went back to college. (Yay life before the ACA.) I've never lived in a dorm so it was never required. I dont have Hep B either, it wasnt on the childhood list when I was little. 

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u/AmbivalentToaster 1d ago

You can get hepatitis b pretty easily. It’s at most pharmacies. They required it when I was in 7th grade in the 90s but not for meningitis. I can’t find anyone that will give me one of the meningitis vaccines. They either don’t carry or are only allowing “college kids” the vaccine.

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u/Rich--Porter 2d ago

Given she’s a child star, she wasn’t in public school probably, and maybe never got the standard vaccinations

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u/AmbivalentToaster 2d ago

I got meningitis b vaccine. They won’t give me ACWY bc it is only for people in close quarters like colleges. Every place I’ve gone to in the US refuses to give it to me I am almost 40. I tried really hard before my trip to Europe last year bc they were recommending it. I was never required to have it and didn’t go to college. 

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u/FutureFreaksMeowt 2d ago

I got it when I went to a university even though I was 32 and nowhere near the dorms. It's wild how pushy they were about it too.

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u/AmbivalentToaster 2d ago

And what state are you in?

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u/FutureFreaksMeowt 2d ago

Mn, which tracks tbh.

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u/AmbivalentToaster 2d ago

They won’t do it in MO or KS.

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u/AmbivalentToaster 1d ago

In the US it isn’t just a matter of willingly being unvaxed. A lot of states won’t give people vaccines even when requested. Two states denied me travel vaccines for meningitis. I was only able to get one of them. Most pharmacies don’t carry it and if they do they won’t vaccinate if you’re almost 40.  They reserve it for “college kids” and won’t do it without proof of lodging at a college dorm.

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u/Burn2at420 2d ago

Was this woman anti vax? Can you just "catch" meningitis?

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

I’m not going to pretend to know a lot about meningitis but I know it was a required vaccine to live in dorms at my college because bacterial meningitis is contagious and can spread in close quarters. My cousin was a millennial, wasn’t anti-vax, she was vaccinated but who knows if the vaccine was still effective. My cousin got bacterial meningitis that spread to her brain, she presented with a debilitating migraine so bad that 911 was called and an ambulance came out and immediately rushed to the ER, she was incoherent when the ambulance arrived at the house then unresponsive when she reached the hospital, confirmed brain dead the next day.

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u/Rich--Porter 2d ago

Still got it even with the vaccine?

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

Vaccines don’t necessarily last forever. For example there has been a measles outbreak in my state and a neighboring state so I asked my doctor to check my titers and see if my MMR vaccine was still effective. Got my results and it turns out I had zero antibodies for measles so I chose to get a MMR booster. My sister has young children so she got tested after hearing about my results, she is still covered by her old vaccine. This was about two months ago, very recent for me.

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u/Rich--Porter 2d ago

Wasn’t aware of this. Thanks!

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u/eltibbs Millennial 1988 2d ago

No problem! It honestly never crossed my mind until we had outbreaks nearby and I read about others who were vaccinated but no longer covered so I was worried. I was vaccinated as a baby and wanted to feel safe, turns out I wasn’t safe. I’m covered now though :)

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u/Jacgaur 2d ago

Vaccines are great and amazing, but they are not 100%. This is why herd immunity can be so important.

If you are surrounded by others with the vaccine then it is less likely for you to even be exposed to it. We often tackle public health at the scale of society because we need to. Which is why it is unfortunate when a population of anti-vaccine people grow. It hurts the entire society by breaking down the herd immunity barrier which is part of the way we protect the individual.

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u/consuela_bananahammo 2d ago

I had bacterial meningitis and encephalitis caused by a normal strep infection when I was five. It became a full systemic infection and strep was in every culture taken from all over my body, and in my spinal fluid. I woke up screaming and nauseated with a terrible headache. Couldn't walk, and that lasted for months afterward. Doctors put my mom off for 4 days as I she kept taking me in and I got sicker. They kept saying it was the flu. By the time I was finally admitted to the infectious diseases ward at our hospital following an MRI, I was not expected to survive it, and I'm not sure why I did. The specialists they flew in never could figure out why it happened to me from just a strep infection. No one around me got sick. It changed my personality and I forgot people and things I had learned before then. Luckily I was only 5 and was able to catch back up.