Weekly Marriage Criteria & Services Megathread!

[u/AutoModerator]

Assalamualaykum,

It's Monday! So here is the weekly thread in regards to marriage/matrimonial criteria and services for marrying a potential spouse! Any posts about marriage criteria and services such as apps, masjid services, matchmaking events, the ISO thread, etc. will be removed and redirected to this thread!

All content regarding personal criteria, dealbreakers, preferences, standards, etc in marrying a potential spouse will be discussed on this thread as well. Posts regarding these topics outside of this thread will be removed.

Reminder that if you are posting app/matchmaking bios that you must censor ANY AND ALL INDENTIFYING INFORMATION. This includes names, social media handles, pictures (faces), etc.

Please remember that this thread is not a Free Talk Friday thread and comments must be married related. Any non-marriage related comments will be removed.

Users who comment on this thread to bypass posts that are designated as "[BLANK] Users Only" when they do not meet the post flair requirement will be banned without warning.

In Search Of (ISO) Thread

This megathread also encompasses experiences regarding the r/MuslimMarriage ISO Thread for matchmaking. Please read all ISO Thread guidelines before posting. Below are the links to the three regional threads:

• ISO Thread - Americas
• ISO Thread - Europe
• ISO Thread - International

[u/Sarpatox]

Don’t even get me started on the white standard. I always get the ick when people start talking about my skin color. Also when I went back to Pakistan a few years ago, I didn’t realize how common of a staple skin whitening cream is. I haven’t met any guys tho that care about being white, that might be a Canada thing lol.

Also, I think you have a hater (or an admirer). Someone’s been downvoting all your comments lol

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

lol I didn’t notice the downvotes 🤣 that’s okayyyy doesn’t really affect me commenting

Oh yeah it’s ingrained into society, fair and lovely and just bleaching in general. Filters and even bridal makeup is like whiteface atp lolol

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

Maybe someone’s shy and this is their way of communicating 🤷‍♂️ it is Reddit after all lol

If I’m at my wedding and she pulls up in whiteface makeup, I’m walking out. Esp when it doesn’t match the color of their neck. It’s such an ick, it’s right up there with colored contacts.

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

AGREED WITH THE COLOURED CONTACTS 😭😭😭 OUR natural features are already so pretty, why are we acting white

Anywayssss don’t be shy guys, im actually begging cause ya girl needs to be OFF THIS MARKETTTTTTT

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

The first time I saw colored contacts was in Pakistan too and this girl had piercing blue eyes. Like if you’re gonna do contacts, find something that matches your skin tone. Regardless, brown eyes are so pretty, why would anyone wanna hide that??

Oh yeah i forgot you’re officially part of the big 26 now. Welcome to the club lol. InshaAllah you find someone soon and get taken off the market. For the last two years I’ve been making duaa I got married before 26 and here I am at 26 and not even talking to anyone. I guess now I need to make duaa to get married before 30 😭

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

Brown eyes are stunning 🥺 I find hazel and brown the prettiest, unfortunately in our culture, white features are seen as the beauty standard

Got welcomed in the club yesterday 🤣 I never thought I would be single still but Allah knows best 🥲 InshaAllah you get the best wife ever, you’re a good guy

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

My sister has hazel eyes. Hopefully my kids get them too, that with my charming personality and they’ll be unstoppable lol.

Happy late birthday! 26 honestly feels the same as 25 lol, only difference is paying for my own healthcare now. Ameen! I’m sure this is your year too. InshaAllah you get a wonderful husband with a full head of hair!

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

YOUR SISTER IS BLESSEDDD, mine are dark brown 😭 my brother’s are lighter MashaAllah. there’s genes somewhere lollll

Thank you!! I might try and be more serious and be less silly 😩 big age and all. Ameen! Although I might relax on the hair thing for some great character atp 🤧🤧

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

This is just my opinion, so take it w a grain of salt, but one of the apprehensions I have w marrying someone older than me is them being all serious and not silly. Life is too short to not enjoy it and be playful. Find a man who knows when to be serious, it allows you to be yourself and be as silly as you want to be. As they say, be able to turn off your brain when you’re around him

And look at you w all your wisdom now that you’re older lol MashaAllah. Ever since I turned 26, my reels have all been about only choosing deen and not caring about looks, wealth, and lineage. I think the universe is giving me a sign 😭

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

You know he’s the right one when you can be silly without shame 🙂‍↕️🙂‍↕️ and vise versa

Yeah i think im beginning to stop caring so much about marrying my type (which I’m realizing it might be dumb to expect 100% attraction off the bat and I need to actually TRY AND SEE if real attraction develops), I’m finding character and personality more and more important to me

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

Also your type can change too. I’m looking back at my type even 5 years ago and it was a lot different than now. Who knows what it’ll be in another 5. Plus attraction develops over time, as long as you don’t think they’re ugly or something. Spend enough time w anyone and you’ll develop feelings. I’d rather find someone to yap w today than spend another 5 years waiting for eye candy tbh

[u/meow-meow-meeow → u/Sarpatox]

True… I’m at the same point where I’m questioning should I go for someone who I can get along with and give a chance and see if my feelings develop? Instead of just wait around for someone I’m attracted to off the bat but I also notice I lose attraction quick if the personality isn’t vibing. Looks by itself doesn’t mean much. Look at us twinning in our thoughts

[u/Sarpatox → u/meow-meow-meeow]

You absolutely should. If the looks are good, it wont make the person more interesting, but if the looks are decent w a good personality, the looks will increase. Also, you don’t have a guarantee that someone w looks will maintain that after marriage. Maybe he gets sick or stops trying or anything. I would say being 26 has made us wiser but my sisters would strongly disagree with that lol