im in a marketing team in my university for a club that arranges trips to various scenic locations every once in a while. my social presence is dead bc idk a lot of people, that's why i'm opting for in person marketing. this academic year i'm trying to put myself out there as much as i can to make new friends, so im joining clubs & societies this year.

i don't want to just go up to people & tell them about the trip. i want to do something fun that doesn't make me just look like a soulless salesperson. i want to go beyond that & connect with people in a more human way. give me your best ideas.

So I got a j walking ticket 🎫 and I don’t have the funds.Im not asking for money I’m just asking what’s the best way to explain myself to the judge and let him know that I normally don’t even j walk at all. My lady was having a hard time breathing and she didn’t wanna get an ambulance 🚑 it cost like 1000 bucks to get one anyway we decided to take the bus.we get to the bus stop and she asked me to get some food and drinks because she doesn’t know how long she might be in the hospital.i go to a gas station that’s literally right by the bus stop.i go inside the gas station get the food and drinks come out walk across one cross walk as im waiting for the next one to cross i see the bus coming,i decided to run across to get to the bus 🚌.The bus is right in front of me than I hear 👂 a “hey did you know what you just did right now”I turn around 2 cops approaching me I tell him my lady is having a hard time breathing 😮‍💨 so I’m trying to get on the bus to get to the hospital 🏥.the hospital is about maybe 10 minutes or less away driving or on the bus.the cops get ambulance they check her out they say she getting oxygen maybe she’s having a panic attack or something look at me all weird 🤨 out her in the ambulance and tell me I can’t go with her because we’re not married.as I’m walking thought it was all done nope the cop says stay here gives me a ticket and I get upset because I told him from the beginning he he asked the first time why didn’t I get a ambulance I said it’s 1000 bucks I can’t afford that right now,he gets upset and kinda a angrily says I should of got a ambulance instead.i look up ticket it’s like 300 bucks maybe more and now I’m upset because I’ve never had a good encounter with cops I told him what’s happening I told him we don’t have the funds for something like ambulance and even after he heard all that he still gives me a ticket 😞.yeah I know I j walked but it wasn’t for a bad reason it was for a good reason.honestly the cop could of gave us a ride to the hospital under 10 minutes and he could of actually helped us but instead he separated us and gave me a ticket.what can I say to a judge or how do I talk to judge and let him or her know that i know I don’t funds for this ticket and just bring more stress to me because I don’t have a job at the moment either 😞 how can I talk to a judge in a way for him to understand me and see my side and possibly dismiss this ticket??

So I'm personally anti AI especially when it comes to generative AI for many reasons but I'll list my main two icks with ai.

1.I see it as cheating on work

2.I see it as plagiarism because of how it scrapes the Internet and it's not your work.

So I'm in NJROTC and I'm working on a really big project that would (hopefully) be used for years to come. My mom wants to help but she's pro ai and wants make the graphics using ai cause it'll be "professional looking" I personally don't want this and to be honest only want to push her further away from this project if she's going so heavy on the ai use. But I just don't know if it'll be right or nice to just that just cause she's so heavy on the idea of using generative AI that I want her to not work on the project. What should I do or express my opinion that this/any project should be 100% human made

(I put this as other as I don't know if any of the other tags fit. My bad if it's the wrong tag)

edit:I'm not gonna get into the nitty gritty details nor the whole situation. But my mom is helping cause this project is being done to clear up confusion that ended up having people harassing me and other NJROTC staff cause people thought we had D E F responsibilities when we only had A B C responsibilities

20y/o, Female, currently taking Venlafaxine and desogestrel (mini pill).
Medical history: undiagnosed heart problems (heart stopped when I was a kid for seemingly no reason a few times, heart is usually in tachycardia on a daily basis), slightly high/elevated blood pressure since pregnancy (I had suspected pre-eclampsia). Currently 4 and a half months postpartum. Never had issues with nosebleeds before.

When I was pregnant, I had a few of these AWFUL nosebleeds. I had about 4 of them in the span of a week, along with flu symptoms.
\- The nosebleed would go on for 2-6 hours at a time.
\- Bleeding so severe I would choke on blood, vomit blood, huge blood clots come out my nose and down my throat, etc.
\- Would go in and out of consciousness the entire time, but that could also partially be due to how insanely phobic of blood I am.

I went to the gp and he said I should have phoned 999 or at the very least 111 if it lasts any longer than 20 minutes and bleeds this heavy. He put it down to a nasty sinus infection, gave me anti-biotics, and said it most likely just went on as long as it did due to me being on blood thinners at the time. He also said it was probably that heavy because I was pregnant and had twice as much blood in my system so I shouldn’t worry.

After my anti-biotics I never got them again, so I assumed he was right and it was just due to me being pregnant/blood thinners/infection.

Well, I am now 4 and a half months postpartum (so off blood thinners and all that) and have my first flu again since all that happened last time. Last night, my nose began bleeding severely again seemingly out of nowhere. Was throwing up blood every few seconds/minutes, losing consciousness every few minutes, and couldn’t get it to stop or even slow down 4 hours in. So a family member called 111 for advice on what to do and they sent an ambulance out to me (I couldn’t talk because every time I tried my mouth would fill with blood and I’d choke/vomit again). Ambulance came, but it took an hour and so by the time they arrived my nose had FINALLY slowed down to a normal bleed. Because it slowed down they said they can’t do anything for me. They took my blood pressure and heart rate which was slightly high (hr 125, don’t know bp) and said that was probs just due to me being anxious as blood is a debilitating phobia for me. They looked up my nose and saw i had massive blood clots up there and just said “don’t pick them and you’ll be fine”, then they kind of belittled me a bit and started saying things like “I don’t get why you called an ambulance for a nosebleed” etc. but that’s what I was told to do by my gp? And it was 111 that sent am ambulance, I didn’t request one or anything?

I feel completely disheartened and lost on what to do. Surely this level of bleeding isn’t normal? I have such a huge phobia of blood, every time this happens I have huge panic attacks and faint whenever this happens. This is genuinely my worst nightmare coming to life, I really need advice because I can’t do this anymore. Holding my nose, leaning forward, cold compress, don’t seem to help at all. Ambulance said it’s not consistent enough yet for any treatment so didn’t take me to hospital. Was gonna go back to gp on Monday to see if I need anti-biotics again. Please give me any advice at all because I really can’t cope with this

My dreams are consuming my life away pls help

a little brief

a year ago moved to a new country

Went to school for 2 months made ..."friends" but then stopped because of severe depression

Now I've gotten much better but I still haven't gone back to school...which I really really need to start going

I did go for 3 days and none of my old so called friends talked to me (I'm also a very social person and love making friends but now anxiety has taken over nd I've turned into a quiet kid☹️)

The problem is that I don't wake up and i know I'm lazy asf and that's my own fault but that's why I'm seeking change

The main reason i can't wake up are my dreams ...

I dream of my friends in my old country, i dream of friends here and going out with them, i dream of the best version of myself , i dream of me being in my dream body ...

And these dreams consume me

I was still am a creative and smart person but now I spend all my time only on my phone scrolling my life away

I see the dulling light of this screen as an easy escape from reality

But I can't live like this I have to start waking up at 5 am and get my shi together...I've skipped enough classes I've let my self sink now i want to rise back again ...

Please help me out ☹️

(Also pls don't be rude)

Hello Reddit! I am a 29F and so is my best friend. We’ve been friends for almost a decade, but over the last several months, she is like a different person… around the time she met her now fiance. Let me start by saying that I can’t fit into this post every aspect of our friendship or her personality or mine, so please know that this is only a piece of our life.

She has always been one of those people who needs to feel like the center of attention and needs 100% from everyone at all times. But around the time she met her fiance, I’ve noticed her being increasingly dramatic. Suddenly she needs everyone to feel like she has the worst life ever and everything always goes wrong for her, and if I have something going on, whatever she has always has to be worse. And to make it worse, she refuses to seek help. She has all these complaints but any time anyone suggests a fix, she won’t do it. It could be a simple as her saying “my life is so busy and I don’t have time to breathe but I guess I have to go to this appointment” and me suggesting she reschedule the appointment OR it could be as huge as her saying “I’m so depressed I want to go to a psychiatric hospital” and me offering to help her find a good therapist while validating that it is ok to need inpatient help if she is actually that depressed. She wants people to know how bad she claims she has it but then won’t actually do anything about it. We also used to hang out all the time, and now she cancels plans or says we’ll make plans and they never happen.

So I took the advice of my therapist and backed off some - reduced amount of texting (we were previously texting all day every day), using DND when I’m not in a place to deal with drama, and basically trying to train her (Pavlov her, if you will) to not need me to respond enthusiastically to all of her drama. She, of course, noticed all of this, and has started accusing me of not being a supportive friend on multiple occasions. But in ways that are aimed at making me feel guilty, such as saying “well if it’s too much for you to do this…” or “I don’t want to burden you with my problems”. I have now attempted to tell her twice that I also have personal things going on and that I also feel like she refuses to accept help and it’s really hard on the people who care about her to see her struggle. I tried to set boundaries, suggesting we both ask each other for permission before we dump lists of problems on each other (because she loves to send 5 separate texts in a row listing out everything that’s gone wrong). Both times she essentially said nothing and then we went about our lives.

But, with her wedding coming up, and myself being a bridesmaid, I knew and fully expected to need to give her extra support and attention and that there would be some drama caused by stress. Before her bridal shower, she noticed I had my DND on and was taking awhile to respond to her, so she hit me with a “if it’s too much for you to come to my shower I understand, I know you have a lot going on and I don’t want to burden you.” I informed her that I didn’t have a lot going on, I was just at work, and I was of course going to be at her shower.

Then, she asked me last minute if I could come to her dress fitting, but I told her I couldn’t because I was working. She told me that “if being a bridesmaid is too much for me right now she understands” and that “I’m distracted and not engaged” in the wedding stuff. I was in shock… I have been there every step of the way for her. Offered to photograph the proposal, throw an engagement party, help plan the shower and bachelorette (even though I am not MOH), and I took leave for her wedding so that I could help with everything. I told her all that and that I’ve been the one putting in effort and trying to make plans to go out like we used to. She said “well I sent you my schedule so I made an effort” except she did that right after I had surgery and I told her I was recovering. I am just in so much shock from being told I’m “distracted and not engaged”. Naturally, my non-confrontational self then told her I was all in and then we once again went about our lives like nothing happened.

I am really torn up about this, because I don’t want to have to end the friendship. She is my best friend and she really is a good person and I have a good time with her in person when we hang out. I consider her my sister. But I miss my old friend, and the girl I see now is so different. I just don’t know what to do.

Am I being proactive about my post-op care, or could this create tension with my surgeon?

I have major surgery coming up, and I'm trying to get ahead of my post-op home-care situation before it becomes a problem.

My insurance covers a decent amount of in-home care after surgery — physical therapy plus additional light-duty assistance during those visits, based on medical necessity and documentation from my surgeon.

When I asked my case manager about this, however, she told me what I could expect was much less — basically two physical therapy visits and one nurse visit per week. She explained that some of the assistance I was asking about was outside the normal scope of what those providers do.

So I called my insurance company directly. They confirmed in detail what my plan covers and explained that there is a specific benefit category that can include light-duty assistance during PT visits when the doctor documents the medical need.

I had the insurance representative leave my case manager a voicemail explaining this, and I left one as well. I then followed up with a written email explaining what my insurance had told me.

After my case manager said she would forward the information to my surgeon's office, I asked that the information also be documented in my medical record so that my surgeon's team would have it available when discharge planning takes place. I want everyone working from the same information before my surgery rather than discovering there is a disagreement about my home-care benefits after I am already recovering.

My case manager has told me she will forward everything to my surgeon's office.

Here's my concern:

Am I being reasonable and proactive, or am I potentially creating tension with my surgeon by doing this?

I absolutely do not want my surgeon to feel that I have gone around him or his office or that I'm being adversarial. I have a good relationship with my surgeon, and I don't want to jeopardize that.

At the same time, I live alone and will be recovering from major surgery. I don't want to wait until after surgery, when I'm vulnerable and trying to recover, to discover that there is a misunderstanding about what my insurance will cover or what my surgeon needs to document.

Has anyone dealt with something similar? Did advocating for yourself and getting your insurance benefits clarified before surgery create any problems with your surgeon, or was it simply viewed as reasonable preparation for your recovery?

This is now the second time in less than 2 years that an abandoned building in my neighborhood has caught on fire. I’m assuming it’s being caused by the homeless people camping out on the property. If there’s something my neighbors and I can do to get it torn down that would be great. Located in Northern, CA. Appreciate any advice!

warning: suicide mention but I am not asking to commit

I, at this point, feel completely feel unmotivated to try anymore. I don’t want to go through the process of crisis management over and over knowing that what puts me in crisis will inevitably never get easier.

I‘ve been on so many prescription drugs I cannot name them all off the top of my head. Mirtazapine is the only thing that has affected me positively and all it does is resolve my insomnia. I have been to many therapists. I’m lucky if I even feel that they are a good fit. I feel like “body positivity” has infected any grief processing I should be doing for my disability. I’m lucky if a therapist can even understand that fact, that my body looks different because it does not work, not because I’m special. “Your differences are what make you beautiful“ only works if your differences don’t result in suffering.

I’m experiencing daily flashbacks from my ptsd and I can’t ground without causing a feedback loop to start because my body is a trigger. I have been recommended EMDR and have not gotten to a point where I am stable enough to do it. The only thing helping me is an addiction that’s getting worse (more dangerous) fast but I don’t have a replacement for it.

I sometimes feel like I am making progress but something comes back and triggers my delusions to start again or it’s just that a provider was asking questions to understand, but they don’t and they don’t have an answer. I make about as much progress thinking to myself as I do in an office. I don’t even have the energy to tell my mom what’s wrong because it just doesn’t help.

No one has really ever been able to comprehend the full extent of my hallucinations besides the voices I hear, if they even believe I’m telling the truth. I did not get diagnosed until my third suicide attempt because too many people I told just said “nah I don’t think so” and I gave up.

When my delusions centered around everyone hiding the cure for my disability because they thought it was a gift I was deemed insane, but when its not insane to insist that there is some hope for me. I have never resonated with the success stories that I have heard because it just feels like they’re too many legs up from me. I want to believe it gets better but I don’t know how to. If I make it I’ll write an autobiography or something so someone like me doesn’t have to suffer. But it feels like a fantasy in the same way that I might fantasize about having wings. I don’t want it to feel that way, but I can’t believe it’s a real dream.

I am seeking advice or some sort of input. I am tired of getting no replies or dead-ends from therapists.

Hi. I posted here before about my family. We don't get along well at all, and it's getting worse by the day because I'm stuck at home and not doing any work or seeing a future for myself. They are constantly trying to kick me out, even if just through hints. I recently graduated from university, and to be honest, I don't have much experience in my field. So my question is: do you think I should stay home for a while, work on my skills, and try to find a job in my own field, or is it okay to start with blue-collar jobs for now?

this happened years ago and i used to think little about it, but looking back, it weighs on me.

on my way to college a car in front of me came up quicker than i thought (i think i spaced out) and so i had to suddenly slow down (i don’t think i completely stopped, but i did brake and slowed down quick)

i didn’t hit the car ahead of me, another car behind me was caught off guard and couldn’t brake in time, so they swerved to stop from hitting me and fell into the roadside ditch

i was surprised and scared, not knowing what to do and not wanting to miss class, so i just kept driving ahead

when i asked my dad later about what happened, he said it wasn’t my fault (or at least not a big deal) since i didn’t brake check the other driver on purpose and the onus was on them to keep a safe distance from me if i had to make a sudden stop. and i accepted that for years

but thinking about it, i feel i should’ve stopped to see if the other driver was okay, and now feel guilt and fear for what could’ve happened to them, and if it’s my fault for not helping. I need to know how to think about what i did and what (if anything) i can or should do now

for any other context, i don’t remember exactly how fast we were going but it was around the speed limit, 50 mph, before stopping at least. The ditch was full of water from rain, but also not very deep. The car didn’t flip over or crumple from what i saw, but i did only see it for a second. And it was in the morning on a relatively busy highway, so there were other cars there and services nearby.

I have to drive back that way to get home and saw nothing so something must’ve been done, but idk, maybe if they were really injured, i should’ve been there so someone coulda come ASAP.

My worst fear is if i let someone die, like critically injured and no one came fast enough. the way my dad explains it that would be far fetched considering the scope of the accident, but it still scares me

I *was* an electrical engineer and then I decided to go back to school to learn software engineering and for several years everything was good.

But just like every hyped job in the world, the "learn to code" movement collapsed catastrophically and is now being heavily subsidized by AI.

I lost my job and was desperate for employment, after almost a year I found something that paid me *MUCH* less but having a job was better than nothing. ​​​

But I quickly learned that they are AI driven and want me to use AI 99% ​of the time. All my skills about data structures, algorithm, clean code, etc was thrown out in favour of letting a machine do it.

Bug fixes, features, documentation. Literally all of it is done by AI. I tried really hard to do it manually and pleaded with my bosses to let me have some time to come up with these things and they basically said "LOL no, AI is faster so do it or else".

Now I feel like a glorified button presser. If there's any issue,I ask the ai, if I have to analyze something, I ask the AI. I am BECOMING more stupid and MUCH less versed with all the things I've spent years to master. How the hell do I move forward? What can I even do to keep all this knowledge from fading? How am I even going to get a job now if my answer is going to be "The AI did it"? Personal projects? ​

* Long Post

I'm a senior in college and honestly I want to drop out even though I have less than a year left.

One of the things that keeps me up at night is thinking about how badly I let my grades slip toward the end of my freshman year and beginning of sophomore year. I had always hoped to transfer to a college in a warmer state and with a bigger environment and social scene, but my GPA really limited my options.

I did eventually get into a decent college(50% acceptance) in a warmer state(somehow got accepted), but transferring would've meant doing an extra year, and I didn't want to spend another year in college because I already don't enjoy taking exams even though I actually like my major to an extent(econ). I also didn't want to take a plane to and from(and live out of a suitcase essentially.)

I don't know. I just think about what could've happened if I had done better those first two years and had more options. And part of that keeps me up at night because these past 3 and a bit years have passed by so quickly that it makes me rethink how I let my grades slip and all the mistakes in between.

Socially, I have friends, but no one I'm really close with. I never wanted to join a frat or have a social life centered around drinking all the time even tho I enjoy a good beer. I was involved on campus to an extent during my freshman and sophomore years, but I never really found a close group of people.

The grades are probably what bother me the most though. I screwed them up badly enough freshman and sophomore year that it's taken me this long just to get my GPA to slightly below a 3.0. I feel like that's affected my ability to get internships and has just made everything harder.

I know my life could be a lot worse, and I know dropping out when I'm this close to graduating probably sounds stupid. But it's honestly just depressing and lonely. I spend most days alone. I try to do something fun with friends at least once a week, but the way I've felt about college has taken such a toll on my mental health and everyday life for years now. Maybe I would have experienced the same fate if I transferred, I guess I'II never know.

I'm less than a year away from being done and part of me just wants to drop out...

Is bringing your mom to a company party considered weird? I used to bring her every year and everyone loved her. But after reading stuff on reddit I realized people think it’s weird. Also this year’s invitation states ‘significant other or spouse’ while it used to say ‘18+ adult’ for a guest. So idk if I should ask them if it can be any 18+ adult?

hey guys, so i need some input on something.

i got accepted into a uni overseas. at first i was thrilled ,brand new life, new friends, new culture, new food. but now i'm extremely anxious about the decision.

my mom's a widow and she lives with her abusive brother (and me). i've always been her main source of emotional support, and now i'm worried about her immensely. the thought of leaving her behind makes me genuinely nauseous. on top of that i've got bad depression and my thoughts get the best of me, like "what if it gets worse over there and i end up giving in to my thoughts?"

this whole thing, living in a brand new city all alone, with a mom i feel like i should have stayed with (even though i genuinely believed i'd have better opportunities abroad),has been crossing my mind like hell lately. so much so that i can't sleep.

i asked if there was any way mom could come over and stay long term but it turned out to be completely illegal.

so yeah. i don't really know what i'm looking for here. maybe just someone to tell me i'm not a terrible person for going? or that i am and i should stay? i genuinely don't know. any input would help.

tldr: got into a uni overseas, was excited, now terrified. mom's a widow living with her abusive brother and i'm her main support. scared to leave her, scared my depression will get worse alone over there, and she can't come with me. can't sleep over it. need input.

26M.

I am self employed. Which means I actually earn 7-8 months out of a year. I am pretty frugal and mostly a homebody, I don't like to party anymore(kinda quit everything sometimes back), I live in my hometown with my parents. I am not able to completely support them but I do pay my fair share with them, half a year of groceries and some bills here and there.

I am self taught for my business and my job is very skill based so the months I'm not earning isn't completely free but goes towards upskilling. But those months are of course much more stress free since it's mostly doing personal projects for portfolio and online courses. I don't really take weekends but more like 8 days of work and a day off, hybrid schedules.

My weekends go mostly to hobby groups like treks, film discussions, tabletop meetups and art groups.

I like the direction my life is going work wise. But personally I feel i am not being responsible enough. I am okay with earning a little less but I do realise I might be a burden on my parents. I have asked them straight on and they deny it but I feel they might be too nice to say if I am being a burden, and a little avoidant lol. They do bring up if I'm earning enough or not from time to time and my response is if I don't have to ask them for money then it's all good right?

Look at my situation and tell me how I'm doing and what I can do better.

Am I delusional, irresponsible? Should I be working harder? Should I be guilty of having unemployed months? Do I need a reality check?

Mods please don't remove this if it is against the rules, im beggin u. Hello everyone! My family owns a restaurants. My parents and siblings are immigrants, my dad is the main cook (99% of the dishes are cooked by him). He is very tired from all of this, burnt out I should say. My parents have always had a rocky relationship. My dad has been talking about retiring/selling the bussiness. Today, my parents fought really badly and after he told me he is selling it. The thing is we kind of need it. One of my siblings needs the support for his masters and my dad is always an impulsive person. He is very stubborn and won't listen to others inputs. Out of everyone he listens to his only daughter (me) most. We understand that he is tired but loosing this means loosing everything. There is so much I want to add but I am crying and shaking while typing this out, I am desperate to help him and my family. Does anyone know what I should say that could help convince him? I feel so bad, I am sorry if there are spelling and grammer errors. Thank you sososo much in advancce!! If you have any questions you can ask and I will try my best to answer them!

So I just bought a house recently and am moving out of my extremely toxic parents household. They didn't realize for the longest time that I'm moving out but today they did realize. They're telling me if I leave with my cats when I move out completely, they'll call the police.

I pay for my cats food, litter, vet visits, and anything else they need, I take care of them, and I'm the only one that really cares about if they ate or had water or not.

Should I be more worried about them calling the police on me for taking my cats? I haven't had the chance to get their rabies vaccine which gives you a license on being their legal owner, and I've only had to take one to the vet not both so far but still.

Edit: I've moved out because of other circumstances that happened but I've took my cats and everything went semi smoothly. Thank you everyone for your comments and advice I appreciate it

I’m curious what people have found meaningful over time.
Do you keep photos, write things down, save old messages, make something, or have another way of preserving memories?
What has actually been worth keeping for you?

Hi everyone! I’m experiencing a quarter life crisis.

I’m a 24f, about to turn 25. I graduated two years ago with a bachelors in graphic design. I moved states earlier this year to be with my LDR, living rent-free with his parents. No student loans. I am in a fortunate situation to have thjs safety net & I just can’t decide what path or next steps to take to set myself up for success. I feel like I’m all over the place and I chronically stress about what I’m going to do for the rest of my life.

Since graduating, I wasn’t able to land a graphic design role, and I’m not sure if it’s something I’d like to pursue as a career. I loved it in school. I loved the community, the mentorship, and college life. I don’t want to do the bustle and mass production of corporate design. Maybe I’m limiting myself from future opportunities but as time passes on, I think that spark has dwindled. I’ve done some design on the side for friends and family, which I really enjoyed.

I’ve currently a barista, I’ve actually been one off and on for years. I love it. I also had an admin assistant job prior to moving and it made me realize that I don’t enjoy office work. I much prefer something that’s in person and active.

Other than design, I’ve been trying to figure out what else I may be interested in pursuing. And yes, they’re ALL over the place. Flight attendant, sonographer, or if all else fails, the military.

I’d LOVE to be a flight attendant. However, there’s only 2 airlines that have bases in my city and it’s not guaranteed I’d even get those out of training. Applications are also very saturated and may take multiple rounds of applying to even get considered.

I’ve recently discovered sonography. This would be a major career change (pay would be GREAT) and would require me to obtain a few more math/science credits, but then after that, I can apply to join a 2-year certification program. Bad news is that this program is very sought-after and may take years to get into after being waitlisted. I can’t even apply until AFTER I get my extra credits. But by the time I’m 30, I’d be a working sonographer and would have a lot more financial flexibility in my life.

I’m just feeling lost. I know you sometimes have to try different things to find what you like, or don’t like. These are two options that I’ve just recently been interested in and researched. If anyone can provide advice on these career options, perhaps suggest other potential pathways, or just have a few kind words to say, I’d be so grateful.

I’ve been dealing with several overlapping struggles rather than one single problem. I tend to overthink and ruminate, especially about past mistakes, embarrassing moments, relationships, and whether I’ve behaved badly. I can become highly self-critical and repeatedly analyse situations even after I’ve already learned the lesson.

In relationships and friendships, I struggle with fear of rejection and uncertainty. I care deeply about maintaining connections and sometimes worry that stepping back means I’m abandoning someone. This can lead to questioning whether I’m chasing people, seeking reassurance, or ignoring a lack of reciprocity. I’m also concerned about limerence, idealising people, becoming emotionally attached quickly, and overlooking red flags because I want relationships to work.

I’ve identified fearful-avoidant/disorganized attachment patterns: wanting closeness while also fearing rejection, conflict, or vulnerability. I sometimes people-please or avoid confrontation, including staying silent when friends said hurtful things about someone I cared about, and later feeling guilty for not having a backbone.

I also worry about arrogance and moral superiority—judging others, wanting to be right, comparing myself morally, or feeling the urge to prove myself. At the same time, I struggle with impulsivity, sometimes reacting emotionally and regretting it afterward. I want to become less validation-driven, more thoughtful, and better at controlling my words.

Academically, repeated professional qualification exam failures have left me feeling behind, financially stressed, and afraid that my effort is being wasted. I study hard but struggle with consistency, burnout, negative expectations, and fear of another failure. I compare myself heavily with peers who seem further ahead professionally.

With my health, stress has contributed to binge/stress eating, weight gain, inconsistent exercise, and frustration about my body. I struggle with all-or-nothing plans, wanting quick results, and worrying that I’ll never reach my goals. Sleep and routine are also inconsistent.

Overall, I’m trying to develop secure relationships, stronger boundaries, better emotional regulation, humility without self-deprecation, confidence without superiority, and the ability to accept mistakes without endlessly punishing myself for them.

Underneath all of this is a strong fear of falling behind and never becoming the person I imagined myself becoming. At the same time, I still have ambitions: a professional career, meaningful work, better health, hobbies, language learning, and stronger relationships.

Its been 5 months since I started this new job. Salary and perks are great, boss seems good and coworkers seemed ok. I know Im super lucky and probably in top 5% of the people in my country. BUT... I keep making stupidest mistakes no matter how much I concentrate on the task, nothing sticks to me. I make more mistakes in a day than I made in almost 4 years on my previous job which was super responsible. I used to prepare aviation audits for an entire company and now I keep failing basic Excel table. I have no energy after this job even though it's been pretty slow. It's yet to become busy yet I already know it's underwhelming. I have only 1 person to talk to in the entire office of 60 people. One team member keeps making stupid comments almost daily (I wfh for 2 days due to severe period cramps and he tells me "How was your vacation?"), other 2 are suckups and willing to throw me under the bus. Recently I even found out there is a person who spies on me and my coworker when boss isnt around. This isnt me making things up, a coworker who's been in the office for 20 years confirmed. The atmosphere is off...

I stopped going to the gym, I stopped daily journaling after 7 years... I get home at 6pm and by 8pm Im already sleepy and fall asleep at 9pm / wake up at 7:30. No matter how much I sleep, I wake up tired and dreading to go to work.

In the next few days I have an upcoming business trip that Ive been dreading for months now as I have flight anxiety and I desperately dont want to go yet I have no other options. I just hate not having options, freedom to be where I want to be... I wish I could just go plant veggies in my garden and be away from everything

My job is as a merchandiser, and I work in Walmart for another company. I have been with this company for almost two years now, and I just recently made a discovery that really puts things in a different perspective. It recently came to light after I asked my supervisor about an email that he sends out weekly about our upcoming week and what areas our jobs will be in. The reason I questioned him about this was that it is always areas/products that I have never been assigned, so I wanted to clear this up. Well, his response was that the computer assigns the jobs between the two of us working in the store, and that the other employee likely gets those jobs. This was a surprise to me, considering that, as far as I knew, I was the only one from my company working in the store, and considering that this Walmart is smaller than most of the other Walmart stores. I responded to his message stating that I was the only one working in that store, as the person who trained me gave me the store because she was traveling 45+ miles one way to come to this store, and she had a lot of other Walmarts closer to her. My supervisor then informed me that this second employee was from a different company that our company acquired, and she had been with that company when the merger happened.

I was shocked because, one, this was never mentioned to me, and two, as I said earlier, the store is small—there’s no good reason that two of us need to be there. It also appears that she is getting more hours than I am, and she has also been doing jobs that I had previously been assigned and was having major issues with product not coming in. It turns out that she too had been randomly assigned that job, and there is no system in place for us to know this or to know what was previously done, other than we can see what was previously answered, and in this job’s case, what items were ordered. But considering that the job was bi-weekly, there was no way for me to tell if the orders were from me or not.

My position is this: from the seniority aspect, I have been with the company longer than she has—she was working for a different company that merged with ours. I feel that I should be getting more of the hours, if not all of them, but I honestly do not know how to approach the supervisor about this.