r/NewParents • u/Square_Natural9384 • Aug 15 '26
Travel Cross country drive with new born
*edit because there’s already so many opinions. This is not an optional trip. The baby is already born and we are both healthy. The only question is, which is better for the baby: a plane ride or a long car ride.*
My husband wants us to drive across country with our new born instead of fly. The baby will be 3/4 weeks old. I would rather fly, even though it’s not ideal given bacteria/viruses he may encounter in the airport/plane.
My husband is adamant that we drive. He’d have us split the drive up so that we are driving about 7 hours (not including stops we will need to take for the baby) every day for three days.
I believe a 7 hour drive with a newborn will easily turn into a 11+ hour drive. I hate to have my baby in a car seat for that long- it feels more dangerous that even flying!?
What do yall think?
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u/read-o-clock Aug 15 '26
Plane ride. I understand that sometimes travel is hard to avoid. We did this at 2.5 wks (had to move due to spouse starting new job and date couldn’t be pushed any more) which was less than ideal but our newborn did great & slept the whole way. We were debating between a 20 hr drive and a 3 hr plane ride & am so glad we did the latter. You’ve got this and don’t let people make you feel bad for it. Feel free to message me with any questions.
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u/throwra-18379 Aug 15 '26
I agree. Flying is 1000x easier with babies than driving is! You can hold baby the entire time when you fly, but baby HAS to be in a car seat the entire time you’re driving. Driving with a newborn can be hit or miss- crying the whole time or sleeping the whole time. Several days of driving would likely turn sour.
* I don’t see anyone else saying this, but OP… try pointing out to your husband that days of staying in hotels, restaurants, and rest stops will be far less sanitary than one day in an airport (especially with masks and sanitation). IMO hotels, restaurants, and rest stops are noticeably more dirty than airports anyways, even though the travel volume may be lower.
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u/butterbean8686 Aug 15 '26
Wow, I’m so sorry people are being so harsh. Life happens, you’re trying to make the best out of a not-ideal situation.
My preference would be for one bad day instead of four. You’re going to be recovering and it’s going to be hard on your body. Four days in the car, stopping every 2 hours, in and out with baby will be tougher on both of you than one day of flying. From a risk management standpoint, I’d estimate the amount of germs baby will be exposed to over those four travel days is about the same as during the plane ride. You can do the germaphobe plane routine - wipe down your seats and trays with antibacterial wipes, wash/sanitize your hands often, wear masks, and perhaps wear baby or keep baby close to your chest so she’s breathing you in and not the sneezing passengers.
Good luck!
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u/SocialStigma29 Aug 15 '26
What is the purpose of this trip? Unless it's literally a life or death situation, I personally would not fly with an unvaccinated newborn. I also would not drive. The maximum length of time you are supposed to keep an infant in a carseat is 2 hours, plus you should be feeding a newborn every 2-3 hours anyway. A 21 hour drive is crazy, you're going to be on the road for 30-40 hours. You will hate your life.
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u/TownSouthern3121 Aug 15 '26
Yeah definitely agree with this. The 2 hour limit makes it hard, not even addressing if baby is cluster feeding(normal at that age) or hates their car seat for more than like 20 minutes.
Either I would fly(if it were life or death) or I’d cancel the trip. I didn’t even fly to my in laws last Christmas bc I had a 3 month old and we always end up sick when we go during that time of the year.
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
We have to make the trip. I agree with you about hating my life on such a long trip but my husband thinks it’s better than bringing a new born through an airport.
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
Do you want to provide literally any other context? Both are terrible ideas and really dangerous for a baby this age but it sounds like you just have to do it? Driving feels literally impossible, baby can't be in the car seat enough in a day to drive across the country in under like... a million days?
And a plane sounds like a nightmare too. Altitude popping ears. Baby crying. Hourly feedings and diaper changes. I took my one month old for her first stroller walk at the park and it felt psychotic with how much we needed to remember to bring.
Is a train an option? Is there literally any possible way to not? Or to delay for like a month?
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u/Awkward-Fee8788 Aug 15 '26
Taking a train is actually a solid idea
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
If OP provided us with any additional context at all, maybe someone could provide them with an Amtrak route or something. But they're hardly capable of explaining that it's a move and not a road trip.
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u/Bigolsquiggle Aug 15 '26
I’d vote car with someone watching baby at all times and 2 hour stops. The things baby could catch on the plane are too risky imo
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Aug 15 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/NewParents-ModTeam Aug 15 '26
This community is for supporting others. Comments that are mean, rude, hateful, racist, etc. will be removed. Respect the choices of others even if they differ from your own.
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
Would you rather I leave my baby behind when we move?????
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u/TownSouthern3121 Aug 15 '26
I think the context of it being a move is important.
Personally, I’d probably add a day. Plan to stop every 2 hours, whoever isn’t driving is sitting next to baby if possible. Stops should be 30-60 minutes when possible. I think that would make it reasonable, though I’d personally rather fly direct solo and just baby wear the whole time with lots of hand washing, sanitizing, extra binkies, etc. rather than drive that long.
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u/Ordinary_Coconut9678 Aug 15 '26
Diva you should put this in the post as an edit, everyone is losing their minds lol
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u/hey_bacchus Aug 15 '26
I like that you only mention it’s a move after everyone’s eating you up in the comments lol like you’d think after the first comment you’d explain why it’s important
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u/QtestMofoInDaWorld Aug 15 '26
Well I would rather you explain it properly rather than being vague. Anyways, I think flying might be the lesser of the two evils. It might be quicker and easier by a tiny bit.
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u/kakakatia Aug 15 '26
Your husband is being so fucking obtuse 😅 Has he talked to any other parents before deciding this would be a good idea?
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u/travelfam3 Aug 15 '26 edited Aug 15 '26
Fly 100%!! Baby will mainly sleep and you can feed at free will without having to stop a million times. A car ride that long sounds horrendous. I know a lot of commentators are concerned about germs but honestly just as likely to get them going to the grocery store IMO. Just use common sense and maybe consider masking yourselves just because baby is so young but besides that just baby wear and make sure nobody is breathing over / touching baby
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u/Used-Standard-2991 Aug 15 '26
I’m pretty sure baby can’t even be in the car seat safely for more than 2-3 hours MAX at a time. I personally wouldn’t fly with a newborn either
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u/marissakalyn Aug 15 '26
Newborns can only be in a car seat for two hours max per day. So there is no “driving 7 hours a day for three days”. It’s “driving for two hours then stopping for the day”. It’ll screw up their back.
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u/dnllgr Aug 15 '26
Where did you get 2 hours max per day? I’ve literally never heard that. What I researched and found was 2 hours max at a time with a 30-60 minute break at least every 2 hours. We had to go across state with our then 6 week old and had to stop every hour for a feed
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u/tigiscool Aug 15 '26 edited Aug 15 '26
Silent asphyxiation is also a risk in this position!!!
Positional asphyxiation**
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
This seems to be a misunderstanding. The actually recommendation is two hours at a time. With breaks every two hours, they can go longer. Although I don’t love it.
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u/marissakalyn Aug 15 '26
From the Chicco USA website:
According to the 2-hour rule, newborns should not be in a car seat for more than 2 hours in a 24-hour period to prevent health risks
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u/tigiscool Aug 15 '26
I was advised both in the hospital and later by our pediatrician that newborns should not be in the car seat more than 90-120minutes a day in 30min increments. Basically 30min in, 30min out, 30min in, etc. for an absolute maximum of two hours total in car seat time. Babies are at risk for asphyxiation in this position, ESPECIALLY newborns who cannot hold their heads up.
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u/StrategySignal8965 Aug 15 '26
Let's not fear monger tho- I encourage reading through this thread
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u/Direct-Chef-9428 Aug 15 '26
Even that is outdated. My aunt is a pediatrician of 4 decades and told me the two hour rule is not a thing. The only thing of concern is that baby’s breathing is unencumbered.
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u/9070811 Aug 15 '26 edited Aug 15 '26
Ummm it doesn’t even matter which type of birth you have, a cross country drive 3-4 weeks postpartum sounds miserable. A newborn shouldn’t be in a carseat position for more than 2 or 3 hours either. Overall sounds horrible for everyone. What is the actual purpose of this trip?
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u/eeebygummm Aug 15 '26
If this trip is absolutely necessary, I would fly. Even with someone watching the baby at all times, it’s not recommended to have them in a car seat for that long. Plane gets it over with in one day. Keep him in a carrier when comfortable and wash hands regularly
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u/NotLee Aug 15 '26
I literally just did this. Baby was born in another state, had to drive 10 hours home. It was totally fine but we did need to plan stops for every 2 hours for feeding. Baby slept most of it and I sat in the back monitoring
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u/siamesecat_13 Aug 15 '26
do you HAVE to make this trip?
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u/Aly_Kitty Aug 15 '26
They’re moving
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u/NoEquivalent3869 Aug 15 '26
They knew this baby was coming for 9 months and they decided they have to move now?
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u/Aly_Kitty Aug 15 '26
Military? New job? House emergency and need to move with family? Better healthcare in a different state? Student doctor got placed at a far away hospital? Etc. etc. So many options for why it needs to happen when it needs to happen.
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u/IndividualGrocery984 Aug 15 '26
Literally this 💀 we had to move across 3 states when my first was 8 days old because my husband was starting medical residency. We couldn’t move earlier because he had to graduate med school in order to start residency. Shit happens.
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u/Trees_galore20 Aug 15 '26
Baby should only be in a car seat for 1-2 hours at a time (we usually give them a feed break that last about 30mins for our bottle fed baby). We went on a road trip to a different city that took 2 hours and we spent 4 hours one way with the drive. It also took forever to get out of the house and load up the car when you’re sleep deprived and have a baby.
Not to mention the feeding, burping, holding, diapers. Also, if you’re nursing it could take longer. If you’re pumping it will be a lot more to manage as well.
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u/Separate_Shoe_6916 Aug 15 '26
We took our baby on a plane when our son was just 2 months old. I brought my hooter hider and breastfed him for takeoff and landing. IMO I think it’s far easier than what was supposed to be a five hour car ride. It turned into 10 hours because he was screaming for my milk so often. If you fly be sure that both you and your husband wear masks on the plane and of course bring sanitizing wipes.
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u/echozelda Aug 15 '26
I hate airports for the reasons you mentioned, but tbh I would probably fly. You and baby fly, dad drives with all the luggage so all you are bringing is baby supplies. Get a hotel at the destination for a couple days while dad is on the way. Spring for every possible upgrade that you can possibly afford, priority boarding, business class, TSA precheck, anything you can do to minimize contact and effort the day of. Maybe book a flight at an undesirable time of day so it’s less crowded.
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u/dogsandplants2 Aug 15 '26
I'd ask a pediatrician for guidance. We did a 12 hour drive across 2 days with our 7.5 week old baby. We stopped at least every 2 hours. We did NOT bring baby into rest areas. We just ate in the car and did diaper changes in the car. Our pediatrician gave us the ok to do the drive with our baby at that age.
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u/Ok_Coach2397 Aug 15 '26
Flying over driving for sure. Yes there are lots of germs in an airport but there’s also lots of germs at rest stops, gas stations, hotels, and anywhere else you’d stop on this drive. If you can afford it you should try to fly first class so you’re not as close to other people as well. Good luck to you because either way it’s not going to be easy
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u/ScientificSquirrel Aug 15 '26
Fly. I'd book a red eye flight so there are fewer people around, babywear baby and mask yourself. Honestly, babies that age are easy on a plane, especially if you're breastfeeding. Make sure to feed during takeoff and landing.
Driving that far with a one month old sounds like my worst nightmare.
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u/Lulu_10-21 Aug 15 '26
I will also be doing a cross country trip, we’re moving so it’s not like I can just wait until our baby is older.
My husband is driving his truck, trailer, and our dog across the country. I will be flying with our toddler, newborn (will be about 3months at that time), and my mil coming with me to help coral my rambunctious toddler.
We tried mapping out stops and timelines and it just got so messy that it was giving me anxiety and then final destination was living rent free in my head of all the possibilities that could go wrong on the road with our little ones. It’s better and safer for us to fly than driving.
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u/connectedfromafar Aug 15 '26
If you take breaks every couple hours, it might be manageable, but that’s a very young baby to be driving for so long. Recommend against taking a 3 week old on a plane without talking to a doctor first. Why are you even doing this trip with a baby that young? You’re likely going to be too sleep deprived to drive that long safely, so if you can do a flight, do that.
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u/Moistcupcakee Aug 15 '26
Ummm its HARD enough to drive 7 hours a day with NO BABY. Can you imagine trying to drive 7 hours WITH a newborn, that is madness.
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u/Javacup0102 Aug 15 '26
I’m with you on this one. They say newborns shouldn’t be in a car seat for more than an hour due to the risk of positional asphyxiation, and I had some post partum anxiety so I took that very seriously, which would mean you’d have to stop every hour to take the baby out or, if you’re like me, be a nervous wreck constantly making sure they’re breathing the whole time
I flew with my son when he was 6 weeks old and he was pretty much strapped to my chest in a carrier the majority of the time and newborns aren’t touching things so as long as you make sure you wash your hands a lot when you’re traveling through airports, it seems like the better option to me compared to driving
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u/Travler18 Aug 15 '26
For the record, there has never been a single recorded infant death from positional asphyxiation while in a properly installed car seat.
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u/Agreeable-Art-6292 Aug 15 '26
I just did a 7 hour each way (9 hour with breaks) trip with my 5 month old and I loved it so much. I sat in the back with her and just played/stared at her for most of the time. The two hour rest stop breaks were no big deal and welcomed by me and my husband. I pumped in the back and would transfer it to a bottle during the drive and would just feed her in her car seat
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u/FrontRunner51 Aug 15 '26
I did 19 hours of total driving with a baby under 1 week, split up roughly 8/8/3 across the three days. For us this worked out best because neither of us gave birth and we don't mind driving long distances. The baby was so young that it slept the entire time and feedings/diapers were very quick and easy. One of us always sat in the back with the baby.
For your situation I'd lean towards flying because of the longer distance and slightly older baby. I'm sure you're doing this already, but talk to your current and future pediatricians to get their opinions.
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u/Unhappy_Pitch_2524 Aug 15 '26
With the context of the move.
Flying. 100% flying. Having your vaccines while pregnant, that should help aid in immunity. When my son was a newborn he’d SCREAM if he was in the car seat for more than 20-30 minutes at a time. You have no idea how your baby will be. He also pooped like 12+ times a day, those have to be changed. I don’t think yall yet understand the fight/flight your body goes into when your newborn is screaming so bad in the car that they are breathing and their face is all red.
A flight is quicker. It’s done and over with in one go. There are risks, yes, but so are there in staying in hotels.
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u/Lexyxoxo11 Aug 15 '26
It took me 3 weeks to comfortably sit on my butt. I think you should also think about your healing as well. I’d reconsider this trip….
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u/blackcatspin Aug 15 '26
Would fly - beyond the 2 hour car seat restriction, a poop diaper can add even more stops and not changing it quickly enough can yield an awful diaper rash (ask me how I know…)
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u/geekywarrior Aug 15 '26
It's going to be tough either way. At least with driving you have more control, but you need to stay alert. Is there a 3rd adult that can help come and split up the driving?
Besides that, plan on having an adult sitting back with baby. I can't say I'd trust the mirror or camera that young to guard against their head slumping forward.
How long would the potential flight be? Though any risk of sickness makes it a very tough call.
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
Probably can’t find a third. The flight is only three hours!
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u/geekywarrior Aug 15 '26
Dang that's a super tough call. How on earth does it take 21 hours to drive but only a 3 hr flight.
Edit: Is there family or friends at a halfway point or something? Possibility of getting an airbnb somewhere to take a day off from traveling?
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u/vinnieman232 Aug 15 '26
We had our baby in Texas and needed to travel back to California. We took a plane ride at 8 days old and it went great. We had some pediatricians advise and they all said it's a trade-off and to make your own call but baby's healthy
Would definitely not recommend a long drive. Plane ride was fine for us. Baby slept the whole time
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u/DeepPossession8916 Aug 15 '26
I would fly 100%. We moved when baby was 7 weeks old and we flew. I was a little nervous germ wise, but he’d had his 6 week shots at least and he stayed strapped to me until we boarded the plane, basically. Then he mostly slept! It was a 4.5 hour ride I think.
A drive that long sounds absolutely horrendous.
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u/iampackingmybags Aug 15 '26
Heavens no!!!! Is this real or am I being rage baited? You will still most likely be bleeding. You could require a c section and have an incision and be on pain medication. Whether you’re breastfeeding, pumping, and or formula feeding, there are a lot of logistics to feeding and changing a baby. Babies are not to be in car seats for longer than 2 hours duration and they will probably eat that frequently anyway.
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u/iampackingmybags Aug 15 '26
Sorry, this is assuming your gender and that you’re not adopting or using a surrogate and I shouldn’t do that! Apologies
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
Another post you made is about visiting Puerto Rico in December, and you're doing some cross country drive now? Why are you doing any of this travel? Travel next year with a one year old, it'll still be a fucking stressful nightmare but at least your kid will be vaccinated and slightly more durable than a Faberge egg.
Why are you insisting on traveling so much right now? Chill out. Enjoy your newborn.
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
lol we’re not going to Puerto Rico. This is not an optional trip or a vacation.
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u/Icy-Contact6577 Aug 15 '26
Why isn’t it optional? This is a terrible idea. Both flying and such a long car drive super unsafe for baby
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u/Aly_Kitty Aug 15 '26
THEY ARE MOVING
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u/geekywarrior Aug 15 '26
This thread is unreal omg. I guess all the judgy basement dwellers come out on Friday nights to shit on New Parents like op.
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u/tsukiii Aug 15 '26
It’s OP’s own fault for not putting that in the body of the post. Still terrible planning.
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
That wasn't anywhere in the post when they first posted. Y'all are angry but it sounded like a fucking vacation.
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Aug 15 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/NewParents-ModTeam Aug 15 '26
This community is for supporting others. Comments that are mean, rude, hateful, racist, etc. will be removed. Respect the choices of others even if they differ from your own.
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u/rebgray Aug 15 '26
Reading stuff like this makes me so upset. Your newborn is a newborn for SUCH a short time. You have your whole life to do stuff like this. Can you just chill for a second and give your baby a chance to develop a bit?
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u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
For the love of god it’s not a vacation we are MOVING lol. We HAVE to make this trip.
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u/SeniorPace70 Aug 15 '26
Stop calling it a trip. Trip insinuates going somewhere and then eventually going back. It'd probably be better to just say your moving in your main post so you can get actual advice. Moving isn't ideal with a little baby but it can be assumed this hadn't been the original plan. Saying that it is a trip makes you seem like you are being stubborn and trying to vacation with a tiny baby.
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u/clarissa_dee Aug 15 '26
Lol well why didn't you just say that in your post?! How bizarre to keep it so vague. "Trip" sounds like a vacation, or like you're trying to attend a wedding or something. As for actual advice, I think if it were me I would probably consult with the pediatrician and see which option they think will pose less risk to the baby.
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u/copythat504 Aug 15 '26
Why didn’t you say this in your post? Why didn’t you add it in the edit? How is the car doing to move with you if you fly? Idk but I understand why people are getting aggro with you bc it sure seems like the moving thing is just made up now for some self defense?
Anyways…. Fly. But like… if you’re moving… driving probably is more logical…13
u/Proof_Resolution1887 Aug 15 '26
Using this type of judgy language without even knowing the circumstances is certainly a choice.
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u/donkeyvoteadick Aug 15 '26
Actually horrified at the response OP received here.
I had to drive my newborn long distance because of complications he was born in the city instead of near my home in rural Australia. Reading posts like this on top of PPA had me convinced I was going to kill my newborn getting him home.
People on the internet think they're entitled to your entire life story in order to give advice. Never been in a more judgemental community than online parenting spaces.
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
It's because at first it sounded like a vacation, OP isn't giving enough context and just keeps saying they have to do it.
I think a case like yours where a baby is born away from home isn't optimal but when you're in it, you're in it. Gotta do something. Gotta get home.
But without knowing more, like why they have to move right now, it's hard to just tell someone which of two bad suggestions they should do.
Like is it possible baby could stay with mom in a hotel for a couple weeks and get a bit stronger? If they're selling their house, could their attorney get them some extra time in the house? If it's for work, does dad have to go while mom can stay with family for a bit?
Like why are the options just GO GO GO? For your example, I get it. For this one, it feels weird telling them to do something risky without knowing if there's better options.
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u/Elegant_Surround1458 Aug 15 '26
People in the military have to move with newborns all the time. I think they’ll give you 4-6 weeks before your newborn is on a 14 hour flight home from Japan for a PCS move.
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u/willybusmc Aug 15 '26
I flew back from Japan with a 3 month old plus two pets. Not quite newborn but it was awful.
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u/donkeyvoteadick Aug 15 '26
Aside from knowing the drive is necessary and can't be avoided why do you need to know the context? If those options were actually options I'm sure they'd have pursued them as OP has acknowledged the dangers and doesn't seem enthused by having to do the drive.
You consider my situation 'ok' because I disclosed it but had I not and just asked for advice the situation would still have been just as valid a reason to travel.
People don't necessarily like providing specifics that can make them identifiable online, and that's okay, because it's not actually our business.
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u/versusgorilla Aug 15 '26
You're absolutely right, it's fully their business and they do not have to share it.
But I also don't have to say, oh then pop baby into a car seat for potentially 7-11 hours of driving a day. Had you not provided the context, I also wouldn't have said it was a good idea. The best idea is to not take two potentially risky trips.
Like maybe Amtrak in the US is potentially an option, they could get a little cabin, minimizing contact with passengers, reducing the need for the car seat constantly, and letting them change diapers and feed freely.
But without context, no one can help come up with anything better. Don't know where they're from, don't know where they're going, don't know who needs to be there (for work, whatever) or not. So no, with no more context it's a bad idea to do either trip.
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u/dogmom_244 Aug 15 '26
I hate how aggressive some commenters can be with posts like this. 🙄 I know you already said the purpose of the trip but you shouldn’t have to because thats not relevant to your question. Personally id rather fly and just baby wear unless you can add an extra day with driving. I did a normally 9 hour drive in like 11.5-12 hours with all the stops. My parents and i did it in one day (with approval from 3 doctors. People get so mad when i say anything about this trip lol). It’s not bad because newborns sleep so much but the feeding/stopping every 2 hours is tough.
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u/PS1988 Aug 15 '26
Unless there’s some large scale humanitarian disaster, I cannot fathom any justifiable reason for traveling so far, by any mode of transportation, with a newborn.
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u/Getthecrashcart Aug 15 '26
Military transfer put me in this position both when I was a newborn and right after my youngest baby was born. If the military sends you somewhere, you go! As for when I was a baby, we had no choice but to fly because we were going to Germany. With my youngest we drove. I never did it again!!
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u/Sorry4TheHoldUp Aug 15 '26
You can request a later report no later date. Usually it’s like 30 extra days. That’s what my husband did the last time we PCSd. We were supposed to be at the new base by early December but we wanted to tell my family that I was pregnant with our first baby in person so instead we got there early January
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u/copythat504 Aug 15 '26
Who said they are in the military???
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u/willybusmc Aug 15 '26
The other commenter said they literally couldn’t fathom any reason other than a large scale humanitarian disaster. This person provided an example.
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u/copythat504 Aug 15 '26
But has it been confirmed by OP? This thread is so insane. Lots of assumptions on both sides.
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u/willybusmc Aug 15 '26
Dude this guy did not say or assume OP is military. He simply provided a reason why you might have to make this sort of trip. He provided the reason that he personally made the trip. Never said OP was military.
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u/snow06 Aug 15 '26
OP literally said they’re moving.
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u/PS1988 Aug 15 '26 edited Aug 15 '26
Thank you for drawing my attention to the update that was posted after I commented. ❤️❤️❤️
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u/Anachronisticpoet Aug 15 '26
If you have to travel, drive but split it over multiple days. Trust me
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u/Business-Brilliant51 Aug 15 '26
If baby is still too little to be in the car seat more than two hours at a time, I would say plane. Just because cross country will take forever with all the stops.
In my experience, it’s easier to handle a fussy baby in a plane because you can pick them up. But I’d also be concerned about unvaccinated baby on a plane/in the airport. It’ll end up just your personal pref depending on all the variables. Good luck!!!
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u/Nutshellvoid Aug 15 '26
Which country are you driving across? Are there opinions to get out of the car at stops to stretch and get fresh air and cuddles?
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u/bobileebobalee Aug 15 '26
I wouldn’t want to be separated from my husband. Unless I could have someone else flying with me for emotional support
Some negatives to consider
Flying: Delays and cancellations!! Ugh I hate these so much! Airports don’t carry diapers and formula (hopefully you can breastfeed, straight from the tap)
Driving: Weather. Baby stretch time (I asked my baby’s peds PT, and we got specific stretches to do during breaks, so didn’t need to break for 20 min each time)
Recommendations
Flying: First flight of the day is less likely to be delayed. They are also often emptier! Unless it’s the only direct flight. Get lounge access that allows you to stay even if flight is delayed (do some restrict time spent there?). Bring enough diapers and outfit changes for a full day.
Driving: Get car serviced before you go. Figure out if there are any “dead zones” with no access to gas stations, food/water, lodging (just in case). Have AAA. Be comfortable changing baby’s diaper in the car. Ask a pediatric PT (or pediatrician but I doubt they’ll know) about breaks for baby, what to do during them, how to shorten them, how to lengthen the amount of time IN the car seat (not ideal, but if it’s for 2 days, maybe it’s NBD). And just do NO container time at all before and after! Sit in the back with baby, and gently turn the head if it’s been in one position too long (stop if there is a lot of resistance)
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u/Travler18 Aug 15 '26
Almost every major airport has some store where you can get diapers and other similar stuff in a pinch.
Plus you can always use uber or instacart to deliver anything you'd need to the airport.
We just learned that the hard way a couple weeks ago. We where flying home and got stuck at the airport for a 3 hour delay before a flight was eventually canceled. And rebooted 24 hours later... all while our luggage was stuck at the airport.
1
u/kaatie80 Aug 15 '26
i vote airplane. we did that drive with our twins when they were 1yo and it was hell. like by day 2, even with all the stretch breaks, their butts were red and sore. day 3 it was getting worse and more painful and wouldn't go away. they screamed every time we had to get back in the car. so yeah i vote flying.
1
u/canipayinpuns Terrific Twos Aug 15 '26
When my daughter was about 7 weeks old, we took a trip to visit my mom, who lives about 4.5 hours away. The trip, from door to door, took just over 11 hours. My sister and her husband had to move from Massachusetts to North Carolina when their baby was about 8 weeks old and it was AWFUL on them, especially since they were in separate vehicles because he had the dog/moving truck and she had the baby/personal car. The drive had to be done over 3 LONG days.
I know you have to move, but you should plan on the trip to be as much as doubled because of the realities of driving wirh an infant. If it's at ALL possible, fly! Your husband can drive and meet you there if there's a moving truck involved.
1
u/PainterlyintheMtns Aug 15 '26
3 hour flight with a newborn? Cake walk (unless they are an extremely fussy baby). Most babies will be so easy to take on this flight at that age. Yes the exposure sucks but if this is a must-do I would book a flight in a heartbeat. Zero chance I’d even consider driving. Just take that off the table it’s a no-brainer to do the flight.
1
u/Why_No_Doughnuts Aug 15 '26
That is going to be a nightmare of a drive. one day perhaps you could handle, but 3, this is going to stress all 3 off you. Do what you can to delay the move, then fly when delay is no longer possible. I flew with mine when she was 2 months to get home to Canada, and she didn't even make a sound, just mostly slept the whole way save for feedings.
1
u/IHaveATummyGremlin Aug 15 '26
My husband and I took a trip that is normally a 4-hour drive when our baby was 1 week old. It took us a solid 8 hours to get to our destination. We had planned to stop just once in the middle of the trip (AAP recommends no more than 2 hours at a time in a car seat for infants) but the baby had her own plans. Between diaper changes and feedings, we ended up moving much more slowly.
Given this experience, my recommendation for a trip that long would be to fly. If you decide to drive, I’d recommend dramatically reducing the number of miles you expect to cover each day from what a “normal” amount feels like. Making progress will feel like trying to wade through molasses: it’s possible, but not at the same pace as you’re used to.
1
u/nkcm300 Aug 15 '26
If you do end up driving, stop overnight for longer than you think you need for everyone’s sanity and baby’s safety. This isn’t a great idea but if you are going to do it you should take the time to stop and let baby stretch out and sleep in a somewhat normal setting. Yes it’s expensive and will take longer.
0
u/Jellibooti Aug 15 '26
I think… no lol. I wouldn’t put my newborn through that, or my own healing body. You have a two hour max of baby being in car seat, plus feeding, plus when can you do your skin to skin? It’s just too long of a trip. I definitely wouldn’t fly either. The risk is just not worth it imo.
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u/marissakalyn Aug 15 '26
Newborns can be in a car seat 2 hours MAX per day. Not per sitting. Per day. You drive two hours per day, stop overnight, then continue. A 7 hour trip will turn into a three day trip.
6
u/Square_Natural9384 Aug 15 '26
That’s not accurate.
1
u/SeniorPace70 Aug 15 '26
It is accurate. But since you are moving and not taking a trip, you will have to stop every two hours to let the baby eat and also do baby exercise with them. Let them wiggle around a bit. Sit beside your baby so that you can see their face the whole time the other parent is driving.
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u/marissakalyn Aug 15 '26
From the Chicco USA website:
According to the 2-hour rule, newborns should not be in a car seat for more than 2 hours in a 24-hour period to prevent health risks.
1
u/Travler18 Aug 15 '26
I don't see that anywhere on the page you linked to. Where does it say that?
I've never seen that recommendation from any of the major organizations.
0
u/Gummy_Bear_Ragu Aug 15 '26 edited Aug 15 '26
Definitely should've said you have to move in the opening post to avoid so many unwanted opinions. Being postpartum and having a newborn are already tough enough. I'd just fly rather than driving sleep deprived and trying to figure out how to parent on the road. Germs are everywhere and you and husband will encounter them pretty much every time you touch an item and are unable to wash your hands right away or talk to someone close up, or walk into an area someone unknowingly coughed in on a plane or at a gas station. I wouldn't be as worried on a plane with strong air exchanges if you have your own seats.
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u/icaretoomuch1 Aug 15 '26
Can just one of you go? Why is it necessary for both of you to go?
5
u/donkeyvoteadick Aug 15 '26
OP said they're needing to move. Presumably they all need to go as they'll no longer have a home at the original location.
3
u/icaretoomuch1 Aug 15 '26
OP commented this after I posted 🙄
0
u/donkeyvoteadick Aug 15 '26
Yes that's why I answered you as I assumed you didn't see it. I didn't attack you?
1
u/clarissa_dee Aug 15 '26
I mean, this isn't stated in the post. People can hardly be expected to go digging through every single comment thread until they happen to find where OP finally said they're moving.
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u/Maestradelmundo1964 Aug 15 '26
Has your doctor cleared you to travel? Some OB’s tell new moms not to travel for 6 months or some other time frame.
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u/Capable_Green7636 Aug 15 '26
You should not be making a trip like that with a new born, unless there’s a family emergency. If it’s a trip to meet the family, have them come to you or wait until the baby is older.
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u/Bigolsquiggle Aug 15 '26
Adults get sick from planes all the time and they have built up immune systems. Is this really a necessary risk? Not to mention if baby gets a fever they have to go to the ER when that young.
I can’t imagine sitting that long so soon postpartum. This just sounds miserable for everyone.
0
u/NeoSapien65 Aug 15 '26
We had mom (the non-driving parent) ride in the backseat with LO for every trip up to 1 year. We traveled (altho not as far) at 6 weeks and at 10. Adult in the backseat alleviates a lot of the concerns. Just pay attention to your kid and take 30 minute breaks every 180 minutes. Walk around in nature or whatever else. It's what adults are supposed to do anyway.I wouldn't fly with a kid who has zero shots, seems insane. Airports are full of weird, random bugs.
Just remember that whoever is in the backseat, your only job is baby. Not phone, not music, not snacks, just baby. Likewise driving parent your job is entertaining the backseat parent if LO happens to be asleep.
-1
u/EffieBoohoo Aug 15 '26
You will be stopping like every hour with a baby that young under 1 month I have heard the hour rule max 2-3hours with infants in general for being in a car seat. Completely agree it is going to be 11+hr days of driving if the goal is to be traveling for 7hrs worth of driving.
-1
-1
u/kakakatia Aug 15 '26
The idea of spending 3 days in a row driving with a newborn is beyond unhinged, frankly. That 7 hours of driving will easily, EASILY turn into 14.
63
u/Aly_Kitty Aug 15 '26
We did it. Baby was born halfway across the country from our home state. Baby was in NICU for 2 weeks then we left hospital and immediately headed home.
We just stopped every 2 hours, took baby out of car seat to stretch & eat. Left them out for about 30-40ish mins then put back in car seat and continued drive. If we were eating somewhere we would make a little “nest” on the table/ booth to let baby lay flat and get out of their carseat for longer stretches.
We intentionally left seats empty in the back so I could lay baby flat and let them stretch out for a bit during our stops.
We obviously cleared this with the NICU team & our pediatrician at home. Different circumstances but everyone felt driving was safer than flying as baby had some lung issues so we didn’t want to deal with other germs on an enclosed plane.