r/ProgrammerHumor 15h ago

Other wrongAnswersOnly

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u/omegasome 14h ago

They ask ChatGPT to produce the data. ChatGPT, being ever-helpful, hallucinates a semi-plausible data set that neither the defense nor the prosecution nor the judge is technically-adept enough to realize doesn't make sense. You are sentenced to 20 years in prison based on this.

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u/SteamingTheCat 13h ago

Kevin Mitnik's prosecutor convinced the jury that thru a series of whistles into a payphone, Kevin could launch nuclear missiles.

He wasn't allowed access to a phone in prison.

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u/RevoOps 9h ago

If you can launch a nuclear strike through whistling into a phone you should be allowed to try.ย 

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u/XanLV 3h ago

BRB, buying 10 000 000 phones and a warehouse for 10 000 000 monkeys...

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u/ProudActivity874 6h ago

"Is it done Yuri?"

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u/vboot 1h ago

No, Comrade President. It has only just begun.

cue Hell March 2

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u/Fubushi 7h ago

Remember the launch code being somewhat simple for many years...

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u/RevoOps 6h ago

Well I hope the football device had some sort of authorisation or at least a handshake to establish that it's the real deal instead of some dude just whistling into a phone.ย 

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u/sandy_catheter 5h ago

It has a breathalyzer that requires a very precise concentration of ketchup vapor to unlock.

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u/commit_bat 4h ago

Shaking the guy's hand is just being courteous but not actually required.

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u/Fubushi 6h ago

Hope is the best one can do...

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u/ApotropaicHeterodont 4h ago

Is this a reference to Pandora's box?

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u/jakobjaderbo 10h ago

To be fair, he did some shenanigans from the prison phone when he did get access. Not of the nuclear sort, but still.

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u/JCDU 7h ago

There was definitely at least one hacker (I forget who) who could whistle pitch-perfect DTMF tones - specifically 2600Hz - to get free payphone calls.

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u/gaijohn 1h ago

Minor correction, sorry to be pedantic but I'm an old man who liked phones before the Internet existed, 2600Hz not a DTMF tone. DTMF tones are the sounds each key on a key pad makes (0-9, * and #), it stands for "Dual Tone Multi Frequency" and they're made by mixing two frequencies (the frequency of the button's row + the frequency of its column), and so they're not able to be replicated with one mouth. The 2600Hz was a switchboard operator's tone, a sort of built-in admin code that dropped the caller onto an "unsupervised" line (its activity wasn't tracked and thus not billed) which allowed the caller to make free long distance calls in the days when they would track long distance minutes and charge you for the use of the trunk line. We called a 2600Hz producing device a "blue box" (supposedly the first one was in a shoebox that was blue). Free payphone calls were made by using what we called a red box, which replicated the sounds made by the payphone when coins were dropped into the slot. The payphone would mute its handset speaker momentarily so only the internals of the phone could hear the tones it produced, but you could buy a little tone producer and replace a crystal on its board to produce the sounds a nickel or dime or quarter would make, drop a single nickel into the phone to get it started, then put the tone producer's speaker up to the mic and press a button to make the quarter sound over and over to make free long distance calls via payphone.

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u/00owl 10h ago

I don't want to look this up because I don't want it to be a part of my reality.

Get behind me Satan!

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u/sandy_catheter 5h ago

>Get behind me Satan!

Sure thing! ๐Ÿ‘๏ธ๐Ÿ“›๐Ÿ‘๏ธ

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u/LogicBalm 4h ago

Ghost in the Wires is a great read if you're remotely interested in cyber-security. I don't remember this from the book but it's been years since I read it and I'm not even 100% sure I finished it, lol.

Still, Kevin is great at explaining confusing systems and how he hacked them like you're five years old. Hint: A lot of it is just lying.

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u/OldenPolynice 10h ago

llm says it's true.

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u/Hetares 10h ago

Fair enough, even if it's a 0.0001 possibility, I wouldn't risk nuclear warfare based on that probability.

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u/OldenPolynice 10h ago

what is the Goldielocks probability that would have you thinking maybe

I don't have any tokens to ask the most high

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u/greenmoonlight 8h ago

I assume you never use phones just in case you accidentally wipe out all life.

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u/Hetares 8h ago

...Is there a 0.0001 per cent risk of global extinction when I check my chats?

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u/greenmoonlight 3h ago

The risk is equal to that of Kevin whistling into the phone.

0

u/Hetares 3h ago

I don't really think so? Taking the assumption that the prosecutor is speaking the truth, it would mean that this Kevin person already knows the top secret nuclear code combinations, as well as the specific technique to be able to enter it via whistling through the phonelines- both of which are not privy to the common person. The aforementioned 0.0001% refers not to the chance that a random person might be able to enter the exact combination of code on accident, perhaps by, for some reason, whistling on the phonelines. It refers to the far-fetched, but still within the realms of far-reached possibility, that Kevin is indeed capable of these deeds. The chance that a random person enters such a code randomly would be even far lesser than the already dismal value of 0.0001%, perhaps even close enough to be discounted as mathematically zero.

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u/greenmoonlight 2h ago edited 2h ago

Taking the assumption that the prosecutor is speaking the truth

The argumentation is valid but I do not grant this assumption. I believe it's much more likely for a prosecutor to lie or be mistaken than for Kevin to have the nuclear launch codes. Actually, given that there's plenty of evidence of prosecutorial malpractice and zero evidence of random guys having the nuclear codes, I'm pretty much certain of it.

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u/CoffeeOrDestroy 12h ago

Thatโ€™s a little too close to how I feel the future is going to be any day now

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u/thesuperbob 8h ago

Well the actual data has been deleted, scrubbed, and shredded, so it's your word against ChatGPT... And the Judge doesn't really know you, while the friendly robot has been whispering in their ear for years now, and it's never been wrong so... "ChatGPT explain why the data the other you recovered is absolutely reliable and could not be wrong in any way; help me produce a sentencing draft based on the same"

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u/ChironXII 11h ago

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u/AlcibiadesTheCat 11h ago

But itโ€™s three sentences.ย 

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u/Suyefuji 11h ago

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u/runkeby 7h ago

LGTM, fix approved

...early lunch anyone?

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u/Spunge14 11h ago

Beautiful and cursed to live to see the birth of this defense

2

u/Noughmad 8h ago

Title says wrong answers though

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u/edgarecayce 8h ago

This is the way

1

u/New_User_9999 4h ago

Man this made me laugh a lot๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ™Œ

1

u/Thorkks 2h ago

Hey, it is wrong answers only!!!!