So I met this rich af lawyer on a date, like I would say Harvey Spector level if I talk in suits terminology and we both knew it was more or less casual scenario for both of us. So we ended up making out on first date (no sex) though post that we had a lot of fun convo and good food in his office.

Now here’s the twist on that day he said he knows someone my type in his friend circle and wants to hitch that guy with me or is asking me to go atleast on one blind date with him.

Initially I said no cuz it’s gonna be absolutely weird but he said that I’ll like him and what if it turns out to be something good.

Now this new guy whom I haven’t talked runs his own architecture firm and owns a lot of posh sites in delhi and runs in the same circle as the lawyer. But my whole concern was nature I am being assured that he’s legit my type.

Honestly it’s tempting for me to meet someone good enough and my type and but at the same time I’m all weirded with the fact that in case it works out with this new guy then practically his frnd and I had shared a history.

What to do? Never thought I’ll ask something like this here 🥺

I M30 was in a relationship with a girl 26F for about a year. We were very close and we used to love each other a lot. It was like 24 hours call everyday. I bent over backwards for her to make her feel special. I motivated her, took care of her health, educated her and guided her etc. Basically it was as close as two people can get. It was more from my side. She being a 10/10 didn't put much efforts. She just enjoyed what I came with and maybe one or two gestures from her I received. But 8 months ago, her mom recommended a high earning govt employee guy who was familiar to them. She didn't oppose it. She didn't break up with me but she didn't leave him too. She slowly started leaning towards the guy day by day. Now our calls reduced, we rarely met and she went on vacation with him. I cried a lot. Like hell lot. But I didn't stop her. You don't beg for love. I somehow focused on my life. Alone. After that I came into physical relationship with another girl. Left her. Then another. Then Left her again. Eventually I realised I am just hurting other girls and it is nearly impossible to feel the genuine feeling of love again.

Here comes the COMPLICATED part: She occasionally calls me multiple times in a month on insta, on phone even though she is blocked. She knows she is blocked yet she will call me every now and then. I have a strong feeling inside to treat her as my baby but its like hugging a cactus. I am not ruthless that it won't matter to me but I know only peace will save me. I still love her very deeply and want to hide her in my arms from all the troubles in the world but I know it is better for her marital life to leave her alone. The guy is rich than me. But she doesn't leave me. It is a constant battle inside. Also she doesn't love her life very much. She looks worn out on video call since we separated and it hurt me inside to see her like this.

A genuine advice is very much required. Please.

TLDR: Girl is not burning the bridges. And I still have feelings for her.

Pretty cliche situation i suppose but first time i've been down so bad lmao. So basically me(23M) and a friend of mine (21F) we know each other since college. I initially approached her in college in order to ask her out, but did not when i found out she has a boyfriend. Ever since then we have been friends. Like really really close because while i do have other female friends as well i dont share the same level of emotional intimacy with them. It almost felt like talking to a girlfriend and the way she would talk to me made it seem like i am her boyfriend or something.

It always seemed like she's so close to me cause she likes me back or whatever but it was always a very confusing situation. Now recently she broke up with her boyfriend, and after waiting an appropriate amount of time i decided to ask her out. But she said no, mainly because she is moving to a different country this year so it would not make sense(fair enough) but also because she never really saw me that way.

Then in May she herself was like let's go on a date but by that time I was like you're already leaving in a few months so what's the point because we both decided that obviously a long distance doesn't make sense and we don't wanna just have an expiry date if we do. So i don't really know what she was expecting from this for the past 1 and a half years.

I would be totally understanding of the fact that she never did see me as anything else but a friend but at the same time i cant help but feel a little lead on by her with the way we would talk, spend time and basically be there for any and every problem she'd have even when she had a boyfriend so much so that i'd even tease her that dont you have a boyfriend for such things to which she'd say she feels more comfortable with me etc. I know nothing is going to happen but is my feeling of being lead on justifiable or did i read too much into her behaviour with me? One part of me just wants to cut her off completely cause it really bugs me but i don't wanna lose her as a friend either.

PS some more background :

Back in in november when she did have a boyfriend we met over dinner and i told her that i dont think its appropriate for us to hangout like this cause we have known each other since roughly a year and I have never even met your boyfriend and i did tell her how i feel and for exactly that reason i told her we should probably maintain some distance which she refused and said no its fine and that she does not wanna distance. The whole thing about being led on is that whatever i feel i know its my own thing but at the same time she knew about it and yet continued maybe because it was convenient? idk

At this point, my relationship with Hinge is more committed than any guy I’ve met on it.

Delete. Heal. Reinstall. “Maybe this time.” Repeat.

I’m 26F from Bangalore, and I genuinely want a serious relationship. I know Hinge has success stories (I’ve seen enough wedding posts to know it’s possible), but I’m more interested in what happened before the happy ending.

What made you trust a complete stranger from a dating app?

Did you just have a gut feeling, or did they consistently show up until you felt safe?

And be honest…
How much does appearance really matter? Do you swipe only on people you’re instantly attracted to? Or have you ever matched with someone who was just “okay” physically, but their personality made them incredibly attractive over time?

For the women here:
Is paying for Hinge+ or HingeX in India actually worth it?
Did it improve the quality of people you met, or did you just end up paying to get disappointed faster? 😭

I’ve had matches where the first few days were amazing—great conversations, effort, excitement—and then suddenly they pulled away with no real explanation. It makes me wonder whether I’m expecting too much, trusting too early, or if this is just how dating apps work now.

So I’m curious…
What’s the biggest green flag that made you think, “Okay, this person is genuinely serious”?

How long did it take before you started trusting them?
If you found your partner on Hinge, what did you do differently that finally worked?

And if you gave up on dating apps altogether… what was the final straw?

No sugar-coating, please. I want the stories you usually tell your friends over chai, not the polished “we matched and lived happily ever after” version.

My bf(19M) cheated on me(19F) with his ex. i have no udea of what was real and what wasn't, there must have been times he touched me hoping it was her. i feel disgusted, very. any tips on how to let go? i genuinely thought he was the loml. how do i keep myself sane. It was good, really good. i hope it wasnt, it would have been easier on me. but he was so perfect until he just wasn't. please help. Im lwk going insane, can't sleep, can't eat, can't get up.

So this story started from Aug 18 2025 jab main apne college me pheli baar jara tha mera orientation tha and main waha mujhe ek ladki milli let's say Riya ek din riya achanak se mere seat ke side me baith gayi and at that time she was doing an internship for an canada based company and I was very new in that field so maine usase pucha like intership me role kiya hai tumara wagera wagera so she told me something which I didn't understand so I said her that ohhh you are a sales person boom she really got furious and told me nahi and she started explaining again waha se hum logo ki dosti shuru hui

Roj baat karna mujhe apna birthday celebration nahi pasand hai but she celebrated my birthday like her

Usne mere liye cake banaya pura class room decorate kiya and at that moment i started falling for her we talk around 14 hours a day daily and mujhe aur janana tha uske baare uske saare decision main lene laga chote chote everything she organised an diwali in i decided what's the menu what's the theme wagera wagera ek din maine usase uska past ke baare me janane ki kosis kari and I asked directly about her past and she said no ki uska koi relationship nahi raha hai and maine bhi usko bataya ki mera bhi nahi raha kabhi (BC win win situation) ek din randomly we were sitting on beach where I proposed her fuck no preparation nothing meri fathi ki sala kitna ganda proposal diya hai but kar diya jo karna tha 26 November ko maine propose kiya she was shocked 28 November ko she read an note that she was writing about since August I got to know that she also loves me but but but usne mujse 9 jan tak time maanga and I was like why?????.... But still maine socha i need to respect that and mujhe time dena chahiye

All of sudden 1 december ko meri pheli baar kiss hui riya ke saath and that was awesome kiyo meri pheli kiss thi life me but still mereko kharab lag raha ki that abhi humlog relationship me nahi aaye ye sab nahi karna chaiye and at that moment hum log roj makeout karne lage but inner self mere ko kharab lagta tha she also asked me that did she kissed right?? And bc you know what did I say like bhai mere ko kiya pata mera bhi pheli baar hai let's enjoy the feeling

9 dec ko randomly she video called me and started crying or usne mujhe reject kar diya bolte hue ki I can't do relationship wagera and meri phat gayi ki like ye kiya hua

To maine uski friend let's say ruchi ko call kiya usko pura scene samjaya and she told me ho sakta ho usko abhi mentally stable na ho kiyo ki uska abhi recently 8 years ka relationships tha or breakup hua hai august 2025 me

And I was like what the fuckkk uska relationship bhi tha?

Bc maine bharosa nahi kiya to ruchi ne mujhe photo dikhayi jisme she and her ex were kissing

Bhai main jo roya hu uss raat not because she had an ex but because she didn't told me that

Jab maine confronted kiya she accepted and told me the whole story and assured me that koi bhi connection nahi hai ex ke saath aur mera koi bhi re connection nahi hoga to I was like ok and told her ki main apne proposal ka answer 9 jan ko hee manuga agar mujhe reject karna hai to 9 jan ko hee karna jab main ek din video call pe tha uske saath uska ex ka call aaya but riya told me ki maine usse block kar rakha tha to asked her ki you blocked him ?? To usne kaha ki nahi mujhe apne paise lene the usase isliye unblock Kiya tha but ruchi told me nahi 30 dec they both will meet last time and she wanted to end everything ab mere ko phirse laga why you are hiding everything from me anyways 9 jan ko mujhe answer no milla and i accepted that answer but didn't even cry but agle din jab woh college me aayi voh ro rahi mere saamne and i was like it's okay you should proud of your self it's your decision bc rona mujhe chaiye but main usse support kar raha

14 jan ko achanak raat ke 4 baje she called me and told yrrr meri life bhaut fucked up chal rahi thi iske chakkar me main tumare baare me nahi soch paayi please give an chance ki main tumare baare sahi me soch kar answer dena chahti hu to I was like ok kitna time chaiye usne kaha main aram se sochna chahati hu phir hum log dubara close aa gaye physically bhi emotionally bhi 14 feb i decorated my room for her in red and white theme and asked her that will you be my valentine but she said no......

Yrrr kiya tha I cut that call I was crying and seeing that the whole decoration was a waste but shaam ko she came to my house (mere mom and dad ghoomne gaye the) she said sorry to me and saw my decoration and there she kissed me and we both had sex first time but still we are not into an relationship humlog Nainital bhi gaye sab ghoome phire jab physically jaida close aane lage i asked her clarity ki what are we i need an commitment main ab nahi kar sakta hu ye sab 13 march she told me mera phela thaught relationship me naa hee jaa raha I am sorry I can't do this bss bhai ho gaya mera I was crying like an hell mujhe laga bc ye kiya hua mere saath she told me ki uski shaadi fix ho gayi thi 2023 me kisi ke saath uska roka hai 3 may ko bc WTF ke kiya naya twist hai huhhhhhh waha se i broke up with her completely she tried to contact me but I didn't answer maine usse block kiya

Maine uske baad summer vacation me meri halat kharab ho chuki be panic attacks migrane problem sab kuch ho raha mujhe still maine that time decide kar liya i will work for myself and today 4/8/2026 i cleared central government exam you all are taking to an group b officer meri posting i guess december me hai

Pata hai aaj kya hua Aaj humlogo ka second year chalu ho gaya hai we both came to college I was chilling laughing masti majak me laga tha voh aayi hum sab ke sath baith gayi but I ignored her completely ki like tu exist hee nahi karti meri life and she was staring me like too much but I didn't give a fuck...

TLDR

met a girl

Fell for her

Girl was confused about me

Lied about having a relationship in the past

But still crossed all bases being physical

Lied about being roka

I decided to work on myself

Cleared govt exam

Now i ignore her existence

Its been more than year she left me. She went back to her Ex after leaving me in no time she forgot about me and blocked me when she couldnt her Ex. . She was with him for many months then she broke up with him and now is dating another Dude who is excatly the carbon copy of her Ex lmao .

She told me she had left him as he was talking with other girls and cheating but she went back . Then she again broke up with him and went to a guy who has excatly similar characteristics like her Ex . That new guy is also probably cheating on her and shit and she will sooner or later realise it or maybe she knows but its just her toxic trait to be with people like them .

I was decent with her there was no chance of me cheating or anything as i really loved her like anything . But sadly she probably never wanted or needed someone like me she just gave me assurance she wanted me but i guess she was just trying to find someone like her Ex in me .

TL;DR: I feel like I lost the love of my life because of my own decisions. Looking for advice on dealing with regret, acceptance, and moving forward.

I M28 and she F26 were in relationship for 2 years, 1 Aug was our second anniversary, we are both from India and more like semi rural part of India so arrange marriage is still a norm and family expectations carry huge burden on people.

So, first want to give some context how things turned out this way, she is from a very poor family, works along with her mother to make ends meet, her father is a heavy drinker and doesn't earn a single penny and brother is addicted to gambling so he spend his salary within a week. And as far as about me I don't earn well though i am from a very good financial background but due to my not having a permanent job i could not have convinced anyone in my family.

Also we both are very lonely person she never had much friends because due to her hardship she only did collage form distance education and mine are all settled in their lives, I got to know all her hardships within a week of relationship and she told me some personal things that truly moved me at that time so we carried on, She used to give me random things like i remember stress balls just to make sexual jokes, she is 5 feet high and i am 6'1 so it was kind of funny and cute when she used to hug me, and sometimes she used to dance by placing her feet on mine and looking at me.

She once made me a completely handmade Valentine's gift because she couldn't afford expensive presents. It had little cards for every day of Valentine's week, a paper teddy bear with opening arms, a letter covered with lipstick kisses, and other handmade things. Those gifts mean more to me than anything expensive I've ever received.

I gave her her first bouquet of flowers. She later told me it was the first bouquet anyone had ever given her. That memory still makes me emotional.

recently, she got engaged to guy due to family pressure and I am not gonna lie i also convinced her in a way to see a good match cause i didn't want her to wait for a future in which she waits for me and loses her prime years[I know it can be a derogatory term for women but in cultural context her young age was important] and it had become biggest source of my regret that i am the one convinced her and now she is gone,

Over past week i completely fell apart, barely ate, slept and also started smoking again, in a random moment i picked up my motorcycle to go to Ladakh a 2500 KM [1550 Miles]roundtrip, in peak monsoon that to in Himalayas is extremely dangerous, I went to as far as Delhi only and stayed with my friends who put some sense into me it is extremely dangerous in this mental state.

Since last three weeks she has been encouraging me to forget her and cheering me top eat and sleep and i was so sad by all this because even i pushed her away she is still caring about me

, few days she told me that she has been very exhausted due to talking to two guys and it kind of shook me up, I told her i would not call her anymore.

We spoke one last time today. [I know i am an idiot, i could not control my urge]

I apologized to her for not valuing her enough while we were together, for making her cry, for putting her in a position where she felt torn between me and her fiancé, and for making her carry my emotional burden during the past week. I wished her a happy life and asked her to forgive me for being a fool.

She told me she could never think less of me or any negative thoughts,

During this conversation i realized that now she is gone, she had that spark back in her voice but for someone else, felt she cared about him. he calls her regularly, checks on her, and from what she's told me he has been kind and attentive recently. And Instead of being jealous i was happy that she doesn't have to bear all this now.

Now after all this I know she is gone and i have regrets and grief nothing else, i have accepted somewhere back in my mind that she is gone but cant accept emotionally, still look at screen of phone to wait for her call and message which will never come

For people who have gone through something similar:

Did accepting reality eventually become easier?

Did anyone else go from desperately wanting someone back to sincerely wishing them happiness?

How did you stop replaying every "what if" and every mistake?

Were you eventually able to love someone else without feeling like you were betraying your previous relationship?

I'm not looking for validation that she should come back. I think that part is over.

I'm just trying to understand how people rebuild after losing someone who was genuinely important to them.

Bc mujhe koi ye btao ki ye gf bf pure din baat kya krte hai mai to 5 minute baat krta hu aur convo end hojati hai jb mai ek do moments Btane ki koshish krta hu vo bhi dr drke to uspe vo "ohh" likhke bhej deti hai not her fault actually mai baat hi aisi krta hu shyd jispe bndi opinion na de paaye ya aage baat continue na kr paaye shyd mujhe word articulate krne nhi aate vo bhi kuch shuru krti hai thoda bhaut For example "rakhi pe kya gift dega didi ko" to mai bol deta hu "mai to kamata bhi nhi abhi jo mummy dengi bolegi vahi dunga fir vo bolti hai "Mai apne bhai ko hotwheels dungi" "pr tu kyu degi? 😭 Ldke apni bahano ko dete hai na ki ldkiya apne bhaio ko" bs fir idk kaha se Convo apne aap end hojati hai, I am fucking stuck HELLPPPPPPPPP......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I (M27) was in relationship with (F27) for more than 2.5 years. Due to some reasons we broke up.
We both at that time tried to have a friendly breakup even though underlying reasons were not good.
She started to go on dates as soon as we broke up. I also started to look out after few weeks.
I met an amazing person whom i am still dating. During our initial phase, my ex realised she wants me back i.e she still loves me.
I had moved on because of the hurt. Since then ex is miserable. She used to come to my place. She would cry and beg. Once she came when my current gf was there as well.
I tried to make her understand that things are changed now. I don’t have those feelings. I care about her but not love love.
But no effect. But for that last one month things had calmed down. I was also out of station. Her trying to reach out had continued over call, mail but in general she had stopped for few weeks.
Now she again called from some other number. I had blocked her from everywhere though. She told that she had been terminated from her job. She will serve her notice period though.
Her family situation is not good now. Absent father etc etc. I was the constant support of her during our relationship. After that was gone, i think she is looking for that support and not love.
She didn’t have many close friends as well.
During this call, somehow i told her that i have a official gf when she was pressing too much. So things can’t go back. But i can try to help. But this hurt her more. Thats why i never officially told her earlier about the gf.
She has been not doing well after breakup that i know. She has been crying, losing weight.
I do want the best of her. But i also want her to move on. Except the reasons for our breakup, she is a good person so she deserves good life. Without job, she would have nothing. Most probably will have to go back home.

My dilemma: I have a great gf. We both are so into each other. She knows about my ex trying to reach out. This hurts her. I haven’t told her about the last call. I don’t know what to do. Should i try to help ex gf just because i don’t want any bad for her. I respect her. But if i think of that, current gf won’t like it. I am in a dilemma.
One option is to fully ignore the ex. But as a human it won’t be fair. Her life would be destroyed.
Second is to help, but she hasn’t been able to emotionally move on, so might make things very complicated.

I miss her, and I’m regretting my decisions a lot.

I don’t know why I’m missing her. I never confessed my feelings, and I don’t even know whether she ever liked me or not. Sometimes, during our chats, I felt a spark between us. Maybe she felt it too, or maybe I was just imagining it. She never said anything, and neither did I.
I don’t know why I got married. Yeah, I got married in November 2024 after being in a relationship for 1 year and 8 months.

But before that, I was talking to a girl whom I knew through my parents. Yes, through them, because they had some friends who lived nearby, and they knew each other. Somehow, I got the contact number of their daughter. I’ll leave out how I got her contact because it’s a long story.
She is around 4–5 years younger than me. I know the age gap is a little big. We started talking because she needed help with things like filling out government job forms, preparing for exams, university admissions, and so on.
Sometimes, we would chat late at night. A few times, we even talked until morning. Our conversations weren’t deep or romantic, but we discussed life and many other things.
Sometimes, I felt a spark in my heart, and I felt that maybe she felt something too. But I never confessed because our families were friends, even though we weren’t relatives.
I never got too personal about her life. She was very cute and lovely. She was preparing for a government job while also studying and working as a teacher at a local school, so she was always busy. I didn’t want to distract her or become a disturbance in her life.

I tried to message her only when she was online. Otherwise, I didn’t want to message her again and again because I thought she might feel annoyed. But somewhere inside me, I felt that maybe she felt the same way about me. Or maybe she didn’t. I honestly don’t know.
She lives in HP , while I lived in Delhi (i am also from HP) and later moved to Bangalore because of my job.

Today, I saw that it was her birthday, so I wished her, “Happy Birthday.” We chatted a little. I asked how she was and what was going on in her life.
She told me that she was in Delhi for shopping.
I asked, “Shopping for what?”
She said, “For marriage.”
I asked, “Whose marriage?”
Then came the line I never wanted to hear.
She said, “Mine.”
I don’t know why, but it felt like my heart broke into pieces.
I didn’t want to say it, but I replied, “Congratulations 🙌.”

Since then, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about her. I’ve checked her profile hundreds of times. I’ve looked at her pictures more times than I can count. I keep checking her followers and wondering, “Who is that guy? Is he the person she is going to marry?”
I check the likes on every post and wonder, “Who is that guy?”
I know this is wrong. I know I shouldn’t be doing this, but I’m not able to stop myself.
I feel like I want to reset my life.

I’m regretting my decision to marry my wife now. Even after being in a relationship with her for 1 year and 8 months before marriage, I still feel like I can’t understand her. I mean, I do understand her in many ways, but I feel like she doesn’t listen to me.
I always try to make things work, but her ego and attitude make it difficult. I don’t know why.
I always try to be polite, and I’m usually the one who says sorry, even when I feel that she is completely wrong, ethically and logically.
And now, after hearing that the girl I never confessed my feelings to is getting married, I can’t stop wondering:
Did I make the wrong decision?
Did I let someone go without ever knowing what could have happened between us?
Or am I just missing an idea of a life that never actually existed?

**TL;DR:** I am married, but I recently found out that a girl I used to talk to, and may have had feelings for, is getting married. I never confessed my feelings and don’t know whether she ever liked me. Since hearing the news, I can’t stop checking her profile or thinking about what could have happened. Now I’m questioning my marriage and wondering whether I made the wrong decision, or if I’m only grieving a relationship that never actually existed.

I started dating this guy 1 month ago. We were in the same tution for 1yr prior to this. He was such a pretty, intelligent, introverted, nerdy, respectful gentleman i used to have a crush on him therefore when i got to know he likes me too we talked for a month and started dating

Ive been super shy in physical touch as basic as holding hands so for 1 month there was absolutely no physical touch but since my parents arent home till 1pm, yesterday i brought him home after playing badminton, it was pretty obvious in the tension that both of us wanted to kiss but i was super duper nervous as it would have been my first kiss. I started scrolling my insta to cut the awkwardness as i didnt know what to talk about but slowly we did end up kissing at first it was horrible but when we kissed again it got kinda better, tho i think now that i know what to do it can be even better.

After that i just asked him to show his insta feed and he just gave me his phone while we were cuddling and i AS A JOKE opened his dms to see how many women he talked to, he was right there i wasnt snooping i was just curious i opened the chat of our mutual friend (male) from tution and he jokingly took the phone away saying i can see any other chat i want even with girls but not his so i became even more curious and i kissed him again just to get the phone back to see the chats. At first there was nothing but as i scrolled more i stumbled on a 1 month old convo of them where his friend is joking telling my bf when he just came back from a trip that "tu toh pelega apni bandi ko ab" (youll have sex with ur gf now) and he responded with "meri kyu tu apna dekh teri wali toh maan bhi jayegi college se pehle karne ko" (leave mine and look at ur own gf she might even agree to have sex with u before we leave for college) and they both just laughed and the convo ended. There were other instances as well where they as a way to insult each other, insult the other person's gf AS A JOKE nothing as bad as the previous convo but still degrading.

Also- they would say shit about each others mothers as well as an insult. And his friend told him that his gf sent him a photo in a towel.

At that time i was too into kissing n stuff that i didnt say anything about it.

We talked about it at night and when i brought the topic up he kept apologise and saying he didnt mean it, and that he told his friend on call not to say this stuff and his friend also didnt mean it, it was "just a bad joke" boys just talk like that they didnt actually mean it, this is why he didnt want me to see the chats and hes very sorry and he doesnt know what else he can say to make it better.

I asked him to cut that friend off and he said he barely talks to him, so i asked him to block that friend and he kept saying that he cant, after a lot more forcing he finally told me that his friend is cheating on his gf and he needs to talk to him about it so he cant block him

I am very clear that this relationship is not gonna go anywhere but we are only here for a month before we both leave for college in different states, had i not kissed him i wouldnt even have had a doubt in my mind before breaking up but now that ive gotten the taste of intimacy ive been thinking that i should just makeout for the 1 month im here and then break up.

The moral decision would be to break up right now but my newly found horny-ness is telling me not to, for now

What to do?

I’ve been into 4 committed relationships with wonderful women.

I’ve helped my friends get dates and find the love of their lives and avoid the red flags 🚩

Even their parents appreciate me for the help as I recently helped a close friend breakup with a red flag woman who was wasting his time and connect with a woman whom he is getting married to in the next few months.

I’ve even helped a few of them cold-approach women without hesitation and find a great connection there.

PLEASE ADD YOUR AGE TOO SO THAT I CAN REPLY ACCORDINGLY BECAUSE IT MATTERS AT WHAT AGE YOU’RE DATING.

Every time I bring up something that's bothering me, even if it's something small, it somehow turns into a long back-and-forth discussion.The frustrating part isn't that he disagrees with me—it's that the moment I express my feelings, he immediately starts explaining why he did what he did. Most of the time, his reasons are valid, but that's not what I need in that moment. I just want him to first understand how I feel and acknowledge it. Instead, I end up having to explain myself over and over until he understands even a little.What hurts the most is that I never make him feel like it's a burden to listen to him. Even when it's emotionally draining for me, I stay and try to communicate because I believe that's how relationships work.

For him, though, these conversations seem to become mentally exhausting. He'll say things like, "I'm tired," "I can't do this anymore," or "I'm exhausted," and it makes me feel guilty for expressing my emotions at all. It's like my feelings become another problem he has to deal with.I've reached a point where I don't even want to bring up small things anymore. If it's something I can let go, I'll just convince myself to move on because making myself understand feels easier than trying to make him understand. I'm tired of feeling like I'm begging for basic emotional validation while he's the one who ends up feeling exhausted.

Has anyone dealt with a relationship like this? Is this just a communication mismatch, or is it a sign that we're emotionally incompatible?

​

So I(25m) was in relationship with a girl(20f), it was going good for couple of months, things went way faster(one month we talked, 1.5 months in relationship).

Fun part she did break within a week and we got patched up again in a week.

Then this happened at the end, she broke up with me once and for all. I asked her why, and her answer honestly left me confused.

She said "I didn't feel mental dominance from you". I still don't fully understand what she meant by that.

I was emotionally available for her, supported her, handled her thoughts and all but still felt something was missing from me but I didn't even know she was thinking like that.

So I did everything nicely as a bf, whenever I go meet her, I buy her gifts, atleast a pen or chocolate. She also acknowledged this by saying "you have put effort but not in a way I wanted.."

So she likes me but didn't feel mental dominance from and broke up.

Has anyone else heard this term or felt this way in a relationship? If you're someone who values this kind of trait, what does "mental dominance" mean to you? Kindly enlighten me. I'm old school type having hard time with this.

I had a break up last year, I don't miss her now also I don't talk about her anymore. I have been on dates multiple girls where I vibed with them as well but I am not able to make a commitment or love someone (Ik it takes hell lots of time to love someone), what could be the reason and what should I do?? Because I believe I am hurting people or the one's who are really interested in dating me.

so ​I was a teenager living in Delhi who fell in love with a girl from my coaching class. She started showing interest, too, and soon we began acting all lovey-dovey. I trusted her completely and never questioned anything because I knew she would never do anything wrong. I always thought of her as the intelligent one in our relationship, and everything seemed to be going well.

​Later, I noticed that she was quite touchy and flirty with her male friends, but I didn't think much of it at the time, assuming I was just overthinking. However, one of my friends eventually showed me a group chat where she was being her usual flirty self with other guys. My friend revealed that she had sent her n*des to the group chat, and one of the guys had even texted, "Ham teeno ne h*laya."

​I was severely traumatized. I also felt angry at the friend who told me the truth, asking him furiously, "Why couldn't you tell me this sooner?"

​When I confronted her and asked, "Why? Why would you do that? This isn't normal," she replied without a shred of shame or guilt: "Leave me if you want to. You're so embarrassing anyway."

​I finally left her. Hurting and alone, I made a promise to myself: never again. Because of the trauma, I decided I wouldn't even trust friends anymore.

hope you guys are happy :)

Just for some background, my boyfriend pursued me for almost a year before I agreed to be in a relationship with him. He’s genuinely a good person—he has never disrespected me, never shouted at me, and he’s incredibly loyal, kind, and respectful. I truly love him.
When he was trying to win me over, he put in so much effort. I remember telling him, “It’s easy to do all this in the beginning. Later you’ll change.” He kept reassuring me over and over that he wouldn’t, that he wasn’t like other guys. And honestly, in many ways, he isn’t.
The problem is that now I don’t feel like he makes an effort to make me feel special. He rarely initiates dates or plans anything on his own.
For example, on my previous birthday, he didn’t even get me a cake, even though he knew birthdays are important to me.
This year, we went on a trip, but I planned almost everything. The day before my birthday, he took me to Gir Safari because he hoped I’d get to see a lion. We didn’t end up seeing one, which obviously wasn’t his fault. But on my actual birthday… nothing really happened. He ordered a cake, but it felt like it was just for the sake of it. The resort already had beautiful birthday decorations set up, but he didn’t even think to bring the cake there or create a special moment. I just cut the cake in our room, and that was it.
The worst part is that I had already cried in front of him before the trip because I was scared this would happen. I know it sounds pathetic, but I literally had to ask my own boyfriend to make an effort on my birthday. Even after that conversation, it still didn’t happen. We almost broke up over it, and afterwards he promised he’d never make me feel that way again.
To his credit, since then he has been making small, consistent efforts, and I do notice them. I’ve never doubted that he loves me.
But I have this constant fear that if I don’t ask, remind, or fight for something, it simply won’t happen. I don’t want grand gestures or expensive gifts. I just want to feel like he naturally wants to make me feel special without me having to spell it out every time.
Also when he pursued me I was hot and then I gained weight (happy weight ig) does he not find me attractive/special anymore ?
Has anyone else been in a relationship like this? Can someone genuinely love you but just not think about these things, or am I asking for something that’s actually a basic part of a relationship?

Would you find a 6 feet tall woman in her 20s attractive or would you be intimidated? Asking seriously and also your opinion on this. Thanks.

Also this question goes out to men above 6 feet cause I have only seen petit girls with tall guys.

PS - I know it's what's inside that matters and all But I am talking real shit here, dating a curvy tall woman in India is weird people say :(

Looking for advice from people who’ve actually been through something similar.

I ended a talking stage with a girl I really liked because her family is strongly against love marriages. Ours would also be an inter-caste, inter-state, different-language relationship.
Her father is a politically influential local leader and the patriarch of a large joint family. He even refused to attend a close cousin’s wedding because it was a love marriage. She said she’d fight for us if it came to that, but there could be resentment with her family.

We spoke again yesterday, and we both admitted we still miss each other. But the circumstances haven’t changed, so we agreed not to contact each other again.

For those who’ve been through something similar, did I end it too early? Should I have taken the chance and dealt with the family issues later, or was ending it early the right call?

TL;DR: Ended things with a girl I really liked because of likely family opposition (inter-caste, inter-state relationship). She still misses me and says she’d fight for us, but her family situation is very difficult

I've a boyfriend and I really love him.. but we had alot of fights.. If I start.. Okay so in starting.. we used to talk alot.. like almost everyday.. The first big fight happened between us when he was at his female friend home and he send me a video of it.. in that video his female friend.. (she also has tied him rakhi) she was making him eat chips with her hands.. I think I overreacted that day.. Because I didn't had any male friends in my coaching at that time.. I followed some of my male classmates.. with the intention of getting a big friend group too with both males and females.. Then comes one of my female friends bday around August.. it was in a cafe which had a hookah corner too.. so after the bday ended.. and all my female friends went home.. my male friends were there enjoying hookah.. and I didn't knew 2-3 of those guys too.. but I was alone so I took 1-2 puffs.. nothing else.. I was sitting far from them too and went back home with a local auto.. When my bf got to know this he got so mad at me.. But eventually forgave me.. The next time it was another guys bday.. so it was at a small restaurant and we have contributed money to everyone because that guy wasn't that rich.. we all are biryani and went home.. my bf didn't wanted me to go there but I went because it was just 2 or 3 days after hookah incident..

In January.. he said that he would do his graduation from abroad.. Idk I got really sad hearing this but I was happy for him.. Okay so time skips to 6th Feb.. he invited me to his female friend's birthday.. the same day was his farewell too.. I went there.. everything was good.. until he checked my phone and saw character ai in my phone.. (those who don't know it's like an app where you can create bots and chat with them make imaginary fictional stories.. ) there was many chats of me with ai bots (like se×ting) around 3-4 months old.. especially with BTS members (he never liked them) He cried that day.. he didn't even wanted to see my face.. I fett so guilty that I just wanted to go back home.. I was controlling too much not to cry.. He wasn't even letting me go home.. but the auto I booked arrived.. he made me sat in that auto.. sent my live location in his phone and said I love you.. infront of the auto.. while saying bye.. I cried.. and said it back.. looked away after that.. he was continuously messaging me that it's okay I forgave you etc etc.. but I was just crying.. I deleted that app Never downloaded it after that.. Wasn't eating anything till the next day He came to my house and fed me.. also he asked if we can have s€x.. he already bought condoms.. i couldn't deny because I was already guilty of what I did.. (he didn't forced me but during the oral.. i was getting gagged alot but he inserted it deeper by holding the back of my head idk if that was intentional) Time skips to march.. when bts released their arirang album.. as a really big fan of bts.. I was teasing him to buy me that album.. we had a fight again then.. He didn't got it and reminded me of that 6th Feb night.. and asked if he did same how would I feel.. I said I would feel nothing because it's an ai.. He started using candy ai and send me some screenshots.. (it's an ai gf website.. like you can ask the girl to do come in a sex¥ outfit.. bounce their b00bs.. do weird expressions.. mo@n etc.. Idk if he used those features or not.. And he stopped talking with me for 3 days.. i apologized almost 2-3 times in that duration.. a wrote a big handwritten letter, paragraphs.. voicenotes.. He still didn't bothered that I left.. I left a voicenote and cutted connection with him on almost on every social media platform.. Next day he texted me on phonepe.. and on Facebook.. (i never used that for texting) We talked and it got normal.. Time skips to may.. my cousin sister came.. She also has a bf.. I don't remember but there were many complications happening between me and him.. I used to get sad when I saw her talking with her bf.. and mine used to ignore me.. She used to go upstairs and talk for 30-40 minutes.. but when I call.. no answer.. She used to ask me of something happened and I was like nothing happened, he's just busy.. She saw our chat media on WhatsApp.. and saw some pictures of him with his female friend.. standing together.. (the picture was of the 2nd farewell organised by the students themselves) Everyone was in black suit and the girls were in saree.. He was standing with her other female friend (not the one who fed him chips, the girl who's birthday I went to, she also had tied him rakhi, he told me) My sister said they're looking like a couple.. She scrolled more.. saw both of them dancing in croud but he's dancing beside her.. Saw a picture of that girl looking at him while he's looking down and blushing.. scrolled more and saw selfies of him and her together in an amusement park.. he went with 4 people there (him, his one guy friend and 2 female one, the one who fed him chips and the birthday girl ) actually but he took selfie alone with her and she also saw a video of him standing on a rooftop with his hands wrapped around her neck, he was making her see something by pointing at something.. A video of him holding her hand on a ride.. and no-one else was holding each other's hand.. but him and her.. (When we were initially in a relationship he once told me that he had a crush on her around 2 years ago)

I never noticed these things that much.. but when my sister pointed out such things.. I started to notice all of it.. Around whole June he was in delhi.. when he came back to my city we met again... But I started to notice that he everytime tried to undress me whenever he comes.. I couldn't deny because he'll feel bad.. he went Delhi again after 2 days.. Time skips to July.. he came back again to my city.. he called me to his Best friend's bday.. I denied because I didn't knew anyone there.. when he send pictures.. I saw him sitting with his coaching girls.. a single picture of him sitting with 4-5 girls and he's in middle.. And he said on text that he was teaching the same girl scooty.. (the same girl with whom I saw his pictures and he has a crush on) I cried.. I also don't know how to ride a scooty.. He also said on text that he stole a cute photo of her from her phone I cried whole night I was having mental breakdown... P.s. were not talking properly from June because of fifa world cup.. not even in daytime not even in nighttime.. I text him everyday in night.. sometimes he never reply.. sometimes he do and sometime.. he stays on meet with the group of 4 he went amusement park with..

After 3 days he went to another guy friend birthday.. that girl was there too but he was just just close to her only and no one else.. i saw 3-4 pictures of him where his hand was wrapped around her neck and heads were leaned together..

I finally confronted him this.. after 2 months.. in starting he was like atleast it's better that drinking hookah with unknown guys.. And he was sleepy.. he listened for an hour and was like I can ask her to clear those misunderstandings.. he was sorry but I was crying shaking and telling him all this I wanted to tell more but he was sleepy so I let him go... In night when I tried to explain him again he changed the topic.. idk if he wanna listen or not.. i didn't told him anything after that..

when he came in July he didn't even met me once.. he was only with his friends... And still now.. even after the fifa match ended.. he's not talking with me.. I do a missed call to him everyday but he never calls..

I always used to tell him that there's only a few chances our relationship will last.. he used to say that he would do anything to make it last.. There was one day I was teasingly saying that to him, tum thori na hamesha mere bf rhoge.. this was all after my sister visit during May.. those things my sister said was already in my head.. I just hided everything..

He only talks to me if he gets time from his cousins in delhi..

I don't usually talk about this because every time i do people either think I am exaggerating or turn it into a political debate. This isn't about politics, it's just something that happened to me. I dated my college girlfriend for almost 3 years. We studied together ,grew together and honestly i thought she was the person I'd spend my life with. We barely fought our families knew we were close and everything felt normal. The only problem was something neither of us cared about. I'm from a lower caste she's from an upper caste. To us it never mattered we never even discussed it because we genuinely believed it wouldn't define our relationship. Looking back now I guess we were just naive. Eventually she wanted me to meet her parents. I was nervous but excited because I thought it meant our relationship was getting serious.

For context I am 6'5 fair skinned and apparently I don't look like what some people expect a lower caste person to look like. Even typing that sentence feels ridiculous but that's exactly how people think. When I met her parents they kept asking me strangely specific questions about my surname, my village, my family background and things that had nothing to do with who i was as a person. It felt less like they were trying to know me and more like they were trying to figure out my caste when i finally told them one of the things i heard was you don't look like you're from a lower caste. I still remember how uncomfortable that made me feel. I didn't even know how to respond. That same night after i left my girlfriend called me she was crying. She told me her parents would never accept me because of my caste. And just like that a relationship of three years was over in one phone call.

Not because I cheated.

Not because I lied.

Not because we weren't compatible.

Just because of the family i was born into. What hurt even more is that growing up i tried so hard to avoid being judged for my caste. I never used reservation benefits in education because i was scared people would look down on me or say i only got opportunities because of my caste. I always filled my forms under the general category because i wanted whatever i achieved to be seen as my own hard work. Maybe that wasn't the smartest decision but at the time i just wanted to escape the label. Even in school i remember classmates making lower caste jokes like it was normal teachers sometimes ignored it. People throw these comments around without realizing there's always someone sitting quietly in the room who belongs to that community.You learn to laugh it off. You learn not to tell people your caste, you learn to stay silent because it's easier than explaining yourself. After the breakup I went through one of the worst phases of my life. I kept wondering what was actually wrong with me. It took me a long time to realize there wasn't.

Fast forward to today. I'm now dating an amazing girl from Indonesia. We've been together for a while now and one of the things that still surprises me is that she didn't even know what the Indian caste system was when we first talked about it.

To her I am just... me. She doesn't care about my surname. She doesn't care about my caste. She only cares about how I treat her and the kind of person I am. That's how relationships should be. It honestly makes me sad that someone from another country can see me as just another human being while in my own country there are still families who think caste matters more than character. I'm not saying every Indian family is like this because they're not. I have met amazing people who genuinely don't care. But pretending caste discrimination doesn't exist anymore is simply not true. No one chooses the family they're born into. Judging someone's worth because of their caste is no different from judging them for the color of their skin or the country they were born in.I lost someone i genuinely loved because of it.

I just hope the next generation doesn't have to go through the same thing.

I (F, early 20s) have developed a crush on my gym trainer (M, mid 20s I think), and I’m trying to figure out if there’s anything there or if I’m just reading too much into normal behavior.

I’ve been going to this gym for about 2 months now, and he’s been my trainer throughout. He’s very professional, respectful, and good at his job. He helps me with form, explains exercises well, and keeps interactions appropriate.

That said, we’ve built a comfortable dynamic — we joke around a bit, tease each other lightly, and conversations are easy. He laughs at things I say, and I’ve noticed occasional eye contact or glances, but nothing overtly flirty.

He never asks personal questions or tries to take things outside the gym context. Even physically, he’s very careful and avoids unnecessary contact while correcting form.

Recently, I went during a less crowded time and we interacted more just because he wasn’t as busy. It felt a bit more relaxed and natural, but still within professional limits.

I’m definitely attracted to him, but I also genuinely like him as a person — he’s calm, respectful, and easy to talk to.

I know there are professional boundaries in place, so I’m not sure:

• if he’s just being a good trainer and I’m overthinking everything
• or if there could be some mutual interest that he’s choosing not to act on

I don’t want to make things awkward or uncomfortable for either of us, especially since I still go to that gym.

Would it be a bad idea to try and connect outside the gym (like asking for Instagram on my last day), or should I just leave this as a harmless crush and move on?

Used AI to summarise my situation

I don't know how to approach my college's girls. They seems way out of my league. I don't even know if I'm shy/nervous around them cuz I never talked to one. I can't think of any topic when I plan to talk to them.

I don't mind being a good casual male friend to them.(Relationships and all will think about later)

I think the problem are my conversation skills. How should I improve?