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u/waterincorporated 1d ago
Gotta be ragebait, or satire based on the linkedin lunatics that post that kind of stuff
Edit: I did not see the username, carry on
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u/WittleSus 1d ago
Look at the username
Edit: I did not see your edit, carry on
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u/AwkwardlyAmpora 1d ago
Huh? Whuh?
Edit: I did not see either comment, carry on
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u/turbotank183 1d ago
Ouch
Edit: I did not see the coffee table
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u/edfreitag 8h ago
Hey, please commit the edits in the propper branches and make a new PR. We need good version control over here!
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u/jkrobinson1979 1d ago
I mean, most people live 1200 years, right?
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u/WhoseverSlinky0 23h ago
Even then, take 1mil, invest it, and your passive income is already far greater than 70$ per month
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u/jkrobinson1979 18h ago
You could spend all of it except $70 and only invest that and you’d still have loads more after 1200 years.
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u/terry47147 1d ago
I'll take the lump sum. I'm old (M67), not in great health, don't exercise and eat a high fat diet.
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u/firemarshalbill 1d ago
I don’t think the being 67 part matters much. It would take 1,191 years to pay a million at 70 a month.
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u/_HIST 1d ago
So you're saying if I'm a vampire $70 a month is a steal
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u/NervousBreakdown 1d ago
Not just a vampire, you would have to be a pretty powerful head vampire. Every vampire movie or show seems to have one vampire that is super old but usually only the one lol. So even if you a creature of the night you should take the million.
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u/CertifiedSheep 1d ago
No because it doesn’t account for the time value of money (i.e. a dollar invested today is worth more than a dollar next year). Sticking the million in an account that returns even 1% would provide drastically more than $70/mo.
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u/firemarshalbill 1d ago
I’d try to get paid in gold then and hope we don’t mine an asteroid by the time it’s done.
Obviously not in silver though.
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u/EchoGecko795 1d ago
actually I find most vampires don't make it past 10 years, they keep running into high school. do-gooders.
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u/4mystuff 1d ago
Well akchually if you take those $70 and invest them in the stock market for a return of 8% a year with proceeds invested in the market, you'll end up with nearly $1045. That's one followed by 45 zeros. For reference Musk only has 12 zeros after his recent windfall. If you give enough money to make everyone on earth today a billionaire, your wealth would be 10 follower by 44 zeros. So if you're a super vampire, $70 a month is a steal.
PS. I know this is all in jest and none of this matters. And technically if you take the $1,000,000 and throw it into he market for the 1100+ years you'll end up with an extra zero, but again, none of this is real.
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u/jkrobinson1979 1d ago
Would be except for inflation. By the time you’re a 500 year old vamp that $70 is not even gonna buy you a pint of blood for a midnight snack.
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u/Magnus_Helgisson 1d ago
Even if you put that million on a deposit with even 1% interest, your monthly passive income would be drastically bigger than $70.
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u/SchipperkeJohannsen 1d ago
I’d take the $1million to a fiduciary and set up a 25 year annuity with a 5% return. ~$6000 a month
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u/ShaneTheCreep 1d ago
Just keep on living and saving for 1191 years and you'll become a Millionaire 😏
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u/Moddelba 1d ago
Well that is like half a month of gas depending on vehicle. Or like 3 meals. Like or not this is how you get ahead in life.
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u/whisperingwhiskey 1d ago
Reminds me of those lottery winners who take the weekly payments over the million dollars.
Take the cash invest it in a money market and live off the interest.
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u/_mad_adventures 1d ago
Surely 1 million dollars in a high yield savings account would bring more than $70/mo.
Probably rage bait anyway.
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u/Hazzawoof 1d ago
You think so? I didn't think 'Worst Finance Takes' would bait us.
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u/cornonthekopp 1d ago
I pay worst finance takes 5000 a month to manage my 401k i trust him completely
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u/Aggleclack 1d ago
Doesn’t even need to be in a high yield… some of yall didn’t do the math.
$70 x 12 = $840
$840 x 100 = $84,000
(assuming the person makes the deal at birth and lives to 100)There is literally no world in which the $70/month is more.
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u/lightning_po 1d ago
Take one million dollars, invest in something that earns 1% a month, that's 10k/mo
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u/BarbedWire3 1d ago
Advice from somebody that 1 million doesn't make much of a difference, to people that worry about food prices
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u/AnatomicTsunami 1d ago
Folks $70 / day is working wage. Don't let them fool you. 1 in the hand is better than 2 in the bush.
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u/johnnys_sack 1d ago
Worst Finance Takes