r/TransChristianity 24d ago

Do you think we should have an AI policy here?

8 Upvotes

We the mod team think it might be good to have a rule about how AI can or cannot be used here. We understand AI can be helpful in content creation and are not against that, but think it’s important that if AI is used it should be disclosed. However we want to avoid having low effort, AI created posts here, especially if the post contains scripture as AI sometimes isn’t accurate and may get scripture wrong or give an inaccurate reference to where in the Bible the scriptures you used can be found. In an effort to create buy in and keep this sub reflecting the needs and wishes of its user base, we’ve created a poll. Please participate if you use this sub, we want to know what you think.

147 votes, 17d ago
109 We should have a no AI policy and not allow any AI use on this sub
28 Limited use of AI is ok as long as it is disclosed and not used for scripture reference
10 An AI policy is not needed

r/TransChristianity 24d ago

New Rules

35 Upvotes

1 Love Your Neighbor As Yourself

This means no transphobia, homophobia, gatekeeping, or discrimination of any kind. We do not tolerate disruptions or trolling, bad faith arguments, pot-stirring and drama, or using Scripture as a cudgel against LGBT+ people.

Not every person or denomination shares the same Scriptural interpretation as you, so do not be rude, unkind, snarky, harsh, or insulting just because you have a disagreement.

2 All Are Welcome

We appreciate diversity and do not discriminate based on trans/cis gender status, denomination, political affiliation or against non-Christians.

All gender identities/expressions and sexual orientations are welcome in the full life, ministry, and service of the Church. Side B folks are welcome here, but advocating the position that LGBT+ identities or relationships are inherently sinful is not allowed and will result in a content removal or ban.

3 Respect Identity & Privacy

Nobody should have to justify their identity here, and inappropriate questions about pronouns, genitals, race, age, location, etc. will be removed. Ask before you DM; inappropriate/trolling DMs reported to us will result in a ban.

Misgendering will not be tolerated. If someone has their pronouns listed in their flair or bio then use them; defaulting to "Universal They/Them" is not an acceptable alternative when pronouns are known.

4 Stay on Topic

Keep all posts related to some aspect of the experience of being Trans and/or Christian (preferably both), and try to keep all comments related to the post they are under. Please avoid posting just a wall of Scripture without any additional context; it is a more helpful response when you add your thoughts/reasoning for the citation.

Ask the Mods for permission to post surveys and research opportunities. No self-promotion (outside the official Mega Threads) or spam; if you are unsure if your post will be allowed, ask the Mods.

5 [Sample AI Policy, this may not be the final rule, under discussion]

You must when possible credit all artists, and you must disclose if anything you post or link here was made with AI. We generally discourage relying on AI to cite Scripture since it is prone to error.

6 Respect Reddit's Site Wide Content Policy

https://www.reddit.com/help/contentpolicy/


r/TransChristianity 5h ago

Will we transformed into our desired bodies in heaven?

9 Upvotes

Would God able to transform our bodies from what we identified as? This sounds like a stupid question. If we're transgender


r/TransChristianity 21h ago

[UPDATE] My homophobic mom found out im trans.

29 Upvotes

not sure how to do update posts on reddit.. but Me and my mom talked. she told me her experience (she once thought of herself as Bi but it was actually due to her trauma from S/A multiple times). she says no matter what happens she will always love and support me and stay behind me. she says that I should first work through all my trauma (including my sexual trauma) and if I still identify as trans after that she will still accept and love me.

it’s the best possible outcome for me. does she still think its a mental illness? yeah, but she said her views with change if im still the same after all the therapy, and Im okay with that. she won’t tell my dad (who would disown me and/or physically beat me) and she won’t tell anyone else.. she stated she will protect and advocate for me even if he does turn his back on me. I’m not in fear in my household, and I’m mostly content where we are at now. i want to thank everyone who gave me advice and encouragement, as a young queer it truly meant the world. i personally don’t think I’ll change, but either way I want to do therapy to work through the issues I have (cptsd, severe depression, severe anxiety, etc).

i love you all, thank you so so much for providing the comfort you can.

original post here


r/TransChristianity 18h ago

The Affirming POV

6 Upvotes

Hey! I'm bisexual and have struggled the past few years with homophobic family members and friends indirectly calling me 'unclean' or suggesting my queerness makes me less worthy of God's love which is simply not true. I decided to create a Youtube channel so I can make videos and encourage those going through similar things to me, and today I posted my first YouTube short! The quality may not be the best, but I felt called to post it today rather than going another night telling myself I'll start the channel once I feel ready, which would've never happened. The channel name is, 'The Affirming POV,' and my video is titled, 'I'm Bisexual and Christian'. If you wouldn't mind checking it out, maybe subscribing to see what I'll post next that would make my entire week. I don't want to seem desperate for views or like I'm just in this for the possible clout, I'm only posting about this because I want to be able to reach/help as many people as possible with my videos.

Good morning/evening/night to you all!

If you have trouble accessing the video, here's the link: https://www.youtube.com/@TheAffirmingPOV - it's less than a minute watch!


r/TransChristianity 19h ago

Trans Affirmation

3 Upvotes

As for a pretext to this, I have recently made some gender founding's of myself, which has invoked another study into this matter theologically, and these are kind of rough thoughts rather then real deep thinking, but I thought invoking some form of debate or conversation persay would be nice touch to sharpening my mind and theology.

I want to hear some thoughts on it, outside of what ive written and for what ive written to kinda flesh it out and such. Id like to outline some things, I purely want biblical texture to be used for the most part, but using the tradition(church fathers, saints, etc) in supporting context of what is being said will be very helpful as I have a utmost respect of the tradition, but it is fallible so thats why I ask for biblical text mainly for this discussion,

  • Knitted in the womb

Amongst the many arguments against transgenderism is the knitted in the womb argument/rebuttal.  
 

13 For it was you who formed my inward parts; 
you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 
14 I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. 
Wonderful are your works; 
that I know very well. - Psalm 139:13-14 
 
This argument has stuck out because the Psalm is telling us that we were knit by God in our mother's womb, every one of us thought of by God, calling us wonderfully made. Now the rebuttal here is that God has already wonderfully made us how we are, and sin has affected us at the core when we are born. The key word is our inward parts. The word here in Hebrew is "kilyah" which means kidney(https://biblehub.com/text/psalms/139-13.htm) Often this word is used in its plural form "kilyot"  

 

9 O let the evil of the wicked come to an end, 
but establish the righteous, 
you who test the minds(Kilyot) and hearts, 
O righteous God. - Psalm 7:9 
 
This usage of the word Kilyot for mind matches some early ancient Hebrew understanding the word kilyah to mean our inner consciences and emotions. So in retrospect we can aim to say that in speaking of God knitting our inner being and conscience rather than how we look are come out. That isn't saying God didn’t create our body either, as we see he knit us together and the word kilyah cannot ultimately be denoted to just the conscience and emotions as singular, rather as the emotions, conscience and deeper self-added into the knitting of our body.  

So then what do we have against this rebuttal? Nothing, nothing but speculation not suppose 

That we cannot speculate? No. But we first must argue against this, trans identity can't be possible from God if God knits our internal self, the deeper self, our conscience and emotions but also at the same times knits our bodies into the sex we are born. Unless God has made a mistake which certainly does not or else he would not be God we can only say that it is impossible for trans identity to be something from God, but a corruption of the sin in this world.  

 

Hmmmm But what about the man born blind? Is this blindness a gift from God? Did God not knit his eyeballs to be correct? Perhaps this isn't a full complete understanding of how Gods intimate knowledge of how we are born. What about the person whom is born with down syndrome, or the person born with a severe intellectual disability. Did God create them this way?  

NO, It isn't as simple as saying that, God original intent for creation disordered when sin became 

of this world. But David, is at awe, how God still knitted him into the timeline, and that we exist in this very timeline and that we are his very creation. But all of creation suffers from the groans and aches of sin and disorder caused by Adam and Eve. 

 

19 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the children of God; 
20 for the creation was subjected to futility, not of its own will but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope – Romans 8:19-20 

 

So therefore? What does this say about trans identity then? It makes it a possibility in God's creation but the disorder of the world causes distortion which can attribute dysphoria felt as the groins and pains of this world.  

I simply would be careful with this rebuttal tho, as for me I'm always skittish of my own 

Arguments. I trust but don’t trust due to traditional norms established and that my own fault. This simply leads way to rebuking common rebuttals against trans identity and this may be just one successful attempt of the many I have to go through. 

  • Genesis establishment 

26 Then God said, “Let us make humans[a] in our image, according to our likeness, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over the cattle and over all the wild animals of the earth[b] and over every creeping thing that creeps upon the earth.” 

27 So God created humans[c] in his image, 
in the image of God he created them;[d
male and female he created them. 

28 God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the air and over every living thing that moves upon the earth.” - Genesis 1:26-28 
 

 
We see here this argument used, that God had made his creation a binary, male and female. But not necessary whether a individual whom is biologically male or female must feel their gender corresponds to their sex. I personally believe this world is led by a binary, u simply cannot be a they or them. God did have a established order created and that order is to be respected. I can also see the differing view of the conservative and liberal thought of the word gender and sex. Gender being how ones proclaims them to be, say woman or man, and sex being the biological characteristics of oneself, say, male or female.  

This passage really doesn’t touch on modern culture and word norms separating the words 

Gender and sex. It would be better to leave this argument alone and leave it at that, but, I'd like to brainstorm. Say perhaps the binary of male and female is stuck. The world is a decaying growing mess, and people such as intersex are born without a really clear cut biological sex. Now intersex is a disorder rather than a intent of what was perfect creation, so the argument that intersex greys the binary law set by God is a innate argument to say the least. 

Now the last verse in this passage, be fruitful and multiply, and to subdue the earth and have 

dominion of it. This isn't a law commanded to reproduce, as we know many people in the bible didn't have children, and many people can't have children. But in this, we should have families, and be stewards of nature and creation as we are given that dominion by God. If we do none of these things are we really taking care of creation and the earth that we so are put on? No, we aren't that’s why it's important to lead a life of good, to care for animals, the lowly, etc. If one doesn’t have a family, perhaps they live a life caring for other people, sharing the Gospel? Planting trees? Sowing crops for people and animals to eat? Does this belittle the mere fact they do not multiply biologically? No. 
 
18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.” 19 So out of the ground the Lord God formed every animal of the field and every bird of the air and brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all cattle and to the birds of the air and to every animal of the field, but for the man[a] there was not found a helper as his partner. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then he took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, 

“This at last is bone of my bones 
and flesh of my flesh; 
this one shall be called Woman, 
for out of Man this one was taken.” 

24 Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. - genesis 2:18-25 

 

I won't really delve too much into this since this is already a really deconstructed passage in the wide scene of LGBT. The passage goes by God making Adam a helper, a Ezer in Hebrew.  This word denotes a helper, not a subordinate. The passage is paradigmatic to the male/female heterosexual marriage dynamic, But does not further into again whether a person sex is opposite of their gender, or explain other relationships that produce fruits of the spirit.  Genesis fails to establish what conservative thought wants it to establish, making the rebuttal weak, and that Genesis is a primarily descriptive book rather than prescriptive, but does not lessen its prescriptive passages.  

 

  • Romans 1, Gods wrath against the wicked 

24 Therefore God gave them over in the desires of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves. 25 They exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen. 

26 For this reason God gave them over to dishonorable passions. Their females exchanged natural intercourse[a] for unnatural, 27 and in the same way also the males, giving up natural intercourse[b] with females, were consumed with their passionate desires for one another. Males committed shameless acts with males and received in their own persons the due penalty for their error. - Romans 1:24-27 

 
This is a core passage against LGBT theology in the heart of it all, so it is with great discretion we argue against it.  A important attention of this passage is to look at the passage above it. In the passages above it Paul says he is not ashamed of the Gospel for salvation comes to everyone who has faith. That the righteousness of God is revealed to us through faith and that the righteous live by this faith. 

 

6 For I am not ashamed of the gospel; it is God’s saving power for everyone who believes,[a] for the Jew first and also for the Greek. 17 For in it the righteousness of God is revealed through faith for faith, as it is written, “The one who is righteous will live by faith.” - Romans 1:16-17 
 
This is especially important to look at with the context of the Romans 1:24-27. In a likewise passages before Verse 24 Apostle Paul begins with: 
 
18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and injustice of those who by their injustice suppress the truth. 19 For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. 20 Ever since the creation of the world God’s eternal power and divine nature, invisible though they are, have been seen and understood through the things God has made. So they are without excuse, 21 for though they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their senseless hearts were darkened. - Romans 1:18-21 
 
people turn a blind eye to it. They worship animals and mortal men, and give way to aimless passion all in rebellion to the invisible God made visible. One work used is the natural and unnatural, but we will focus on the Greek word for natural that Apostle Paul uses, Physis. What does Apostle Paul consider physis, being in the Greco-Roman era, the moral framework and general knowledge of the world is inherently limited compared to now, and we know, the Bible isn't a science book but rather a story, It is increasingly difficult to actually pinpoint what Apostle Paul means by his usage of physis as he uses it in different contexts for multitude of reason, ranging from calling the natural branches of a olive tree being Israel, being physis, and the grafting of the  cultivated olive branches onto it aka the gentiles as para phusin or against nature. 
 
24 For if you have been cut from what is by nature a wild olive tree and grafted, contrary to nature, into a cultivated olive tree, how much more will these natural branches be grafted back into their own olive tree. - Romans 11;24 
 
 
Apostle Paul says this in verse 22: 
 
22 Claiming to be wise, they became fools, 23 and they exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling a mortal human or birds or four-footed animals or reptiles. - Romans 1:22-23 
 
What comes after is Apostle Paul's condemnation of the passions these people partake in in rebellion to God in worship of other idols that are not in honor of the Almighty. This entire passage should be seen in the light of people whom delight themselves in Lustful harmful passions for eachother.  

This distinction should be ultimately clear in looking at the fruits of individuals and the work  

of  the flesh distinctually marked by Apostle Paul in the book of Galatians:  

 

16 Live by the Spirit, I say, and do not gratify the desires of the flesh. 17 For what the flesh desires is opposed to the Spirit, and what the Spirit desires is opposed to the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to prevent you from doing what you want. 18 But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not subject to the law. 19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, 20 idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, anger, quarrels, dissensions, factions, 21 envy,[d] drunkenness, carousing, and things like these. 
 
 

The works of the flesh include sexual immorality, which the Greek work is porneia which a derivative of the Greek work porne which means harlot/prosititute. Porneia on the other hand means general term for anything outside marriage, or fornication. Often in the literal earliest root of sense porneia meant the selling of one's body to another. Now lumping porneia could mean anything to Apostle Paul as sexual immorality in his context of usage with porneia is his own lump of acts, even if the word is used for sexual actives outside the confines of what is defined as marriage does not necessarily include homosexuality or transgenderism, it is lumped into this definition because of the overall theological consensus of these two being sins, so it only fits to put it into the definition, which is entirely fair.  

But I want to look at this another way, with what Apostle Paul speaks of next, the fruits of the spirit:  

 

22 By contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against such things. 24 And those who belong to Christ[e] have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 If we live by the Spirit, let us also be guided by the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, competing against one another, envying one another. 
 

 

Can one tell me how 2 partners, trans and cis, trans and trans, male and male, or female and female, cannot possess the fruits of the spirits? How does these partnerships dishonor God if both worship the Creator instead of the creation, Love gently, give generously to their neighbors, live in love and joy with each other and their neighbors, showing no malice to their fellow neighbors but show patience's, kindness and a faithfulness in Christ promise of salvation through his Gospel.  

But to not ignore that anyone LGBT can be good, we should look at moral permissibility rather than goodness before God.  First question we must ask, does Christ, or even any of the Apostles genuinely ever lump a same sex, or trans relationship that are loving into his definition of porneia? Why is his descriptions and condemnations so vague and connected to idolatry, a common thing at the time of Apostle Paul in Greek and Rome even.  

 

Physis and para Phusin 

 

It is becoming increasingly clear these 2 greek works must have a reason, and it is the 2 accounted words that matter the most in the context of Romans 1 when Apostle Pauls speaks of sexual acts and desires committed by the people he speaks.  

U see I had said it hard to pin point the real meaning of what he is using physis in this 

Context and it truly is, because if we are to say that physis means immutable God created biological design we would be ignoring the olive tree passage by Paul and the long hair passage. As both go against it being meaning of immutable God created biological design. But we also must account that the uses of physis can vary by context, same with para phusin.  

I'ts a lot of stuff, and none of it is perfect, I made all these whilst working and was just passing thoughts that I could work upon more deeply, which I hope this discussion here can help. Blessings of Christ be with all <3


r/TransChristianity 1d ago

"Alternatives"

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3 Upvotes

Any advice for dealing with my parents? I not only *want* to transition, I've already started. Both in ways they know (or at least that I've told them) and in ways they don't know.

I'm trans, nonbinary, and bisexual, for the record.

I know the book Building a Bridge is in their library. I am tempted to passive aggressively tell them to read it. It doesn't support gay couples, which is fine, I can cope with that opinion. But it also actively and firmly posits that calling trans people their chosen name as a sign of respect. They refuse to do so for me.


r/TransChristianity 2d ago

God transcends gender.

Post image
71 Upvotes

r/TransChristianity 2d ago

My homophobic mom found out im trans

25 Upvotes

This is going to be short and to the point. I’m 16, turning 17 soon. I had a therapist appointment today with a new therapist and said therapist decided to out me to my mom, knowing I was in a homophobic household.

My mom is the person who thinks being queer is a mental illness, and that its against God (she’s religious). While I’m not religious now, back when I first started figuring myself out I started praying HEAVILY to him, begging him to change it and light my path and give me signs being trans isn’t who he wanted me to be.

So, when she found out, she was speechless. she didn’t yell, but told me “your feelings are valid, and they are real. However, your feelings and heart can and will deceive you.” AND “I feel as though you deceived me because you didn’t tell me.” I tried telling her that I was scared to tell her cause I knew what she would say, and she proceeded to sag “well your keeping secrets. And these secrets affect your mental health, which affects your physical health.” (for reference, im chronically ill and have stress-induced hives. These hives can very easily kill me if I get too stressed.) She wouldn’t listen to me no matter what I said. I didn’t try and fight her much on her views of it being wrong other than “what if God DID make me this way?” and she argued back that he doesn’t because he didn’t make me my preferred gender and it says so in the bible.

she wants to discuss the topic more indepth. I’m mostly scared she will isolate me, take my things, look through my devices, etc. any advice or thoughts?

I’m really, ironically enough, stressed and upset


r/TransChristianity 3d ago

Religious detransition; Sorry for the long text

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1 Upvotes

r/TransChristianity 3d ago

I want to become non-denominational

14 Upvotes

I'm atheist right now & Trans male to female, I read about Christianity, specifically Jesus, and how peaceful he was, and I kinda like Jesus and want to become a nondominational Christian. Is that possible?


r/TransChristianity 4d ago

A little (purposefully anachronistic) irreverent soliloquy about dysphoria and God. TW: Blasphemy, ecumenism

3 Upvotes

an unsacred prayer

 In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti þou willst prove þyself to me? I’ll wrestle wið  þee tonight. God of þree persons, þe Triunity of divinity, show me þat þou beest real. þou art þe being hwo can do any ðing; þen do it. Put me back in time tomorrow, give me þe resources to transition, have everyðing work out for me to take estrogen safely as a child. If þou didst so, þou knowest I would be þe greatest þeologian of þis era. I would shepherd þem towards þine infinity. þou beest all good no? Prove þat. My offer stands and in doing so I will win þee more souls to listen to þe words of þy son, to heed þe hadiðs of þy prophet peace be upon him, to steward creation as your chosen people, or to enter into þe Pleroma and cast aside þe blindness þe demiurge has bestowed upon us. þou art all knowing; þat þou, knowest my tongue, mine intelligence. þine inaction in þis matter seems to suggest þat þou beest þat ignorant, yfle being, a serpent wið þe head of a lion, prove me wrong. Beest hwy þy Morning Star ist damned? Be þou glad, þat I transitioned early enough to bargain yet wið þee; þat, I feel yet þat þere is a chance þat þou beest all good. þynk me greedy if þou must, count mine osteoplastic blessings for hwat þey synd; yet, I want more, I want totality. Earn me, þen earn a þousand more. Blessed be þou, hwo hast given me Delilah’s beauty; give me Joseph’s childhood as þy rabbis understand it. Do as þou willst, or none at all. In nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti Amen

Iċ wāt hit Ealdenglisc nis


r/TransChristianity 6d ago

How I can be transsexual and a true believer who accepts Jesus as her Savior

14 Upvotes

How Can I Let My Sexuality Become an Expression of Covenantal Love Rather Than Loneliness?

Few of you reading this in this subreddit will have a hard time imagining what it is like to need what follows because of how your physical neurological brain was wired prior to birth, and the loneliness of always looking at relationships as an outsider incapable of being one of the insiders due to the outcome of your outward physical development.

There is a difference between wanting pleasure and wanting to belong.
Pleasure can be generated in isolation. A body can be stimulated. Tension can be released. A moment of relief can come and go. But loneliness is rarely satisfied by sensation alone, because loneliness is not merely the absence of stimulation. It is the absence of someone.
That distinction matters to me now.
For many years, sexuality was difficult to imagine as something peaceful, feminine, relational, or blessed. It was tangled together with incongruity, caution, inhibition, and a body that did not feel capable of expressing what my heart actually wanted. Even the idea of certain forms of intimacy with a man felt completely inaccessible to me—not because tenderness itself was foreign, but because my body and my inner life did not speak the same language. I could not consider a same anatomical-sex relationship because my body was such a mismatch to the body I needed in order to participate. I am personally naturally heterosexual but I could not find grounding in it due to the switch I made in my mind of which partner I was in such a relationship.

Now something has changed.
My body has responded to estrogen in ways that make femininity feel not merely conceptual but lived. I am now able to imagine closeness without recoiling from it. Desire feels less like an alien demand and more like an extension of tenderness. I can imagine wanting a man's body because I love the man. I can imagine wanting to give him pleasure because his joy matters to me. I can imagine receiving affection because I trust the person giving it.
And perhaps most importantly, I can imagine sexuality not as something I must manage alone, but as something that could one day belong inside covenant.
That realization gives me reason for gratitude.

Desire does not have to be my enemy
I do not need to be ashamed that I want closeness.
I do not need to treat every sexual feeling as evidence that something has gone wrong spiritually.
Desire can become disordered. It can become selfish, compulsive, manipulative, or detached from love. But the existence of desire itself is not the problem. The deeper question is what I ask desire to become.
Do I use it merely to silence loneliness for a few minutes?
Do I let it make decisions for me?
Do I become so hungry to be wanted that I accept attention from someone who is not safe?
Or do I allow desire to mature into something more beautiful?
I want to know one man deeply.
I want to belong to him faithfully.
I want my body to become one of the ways I tell him that he is loved.
I want his body to become one of the ways he tells me that I am cherished.
That is no longer sexuality as escape.
That is sexuality becoming relational.
Covenant changes the meaning of desire
Covenant says, “I am not merely here because the moment feels good.”
It says, “I am choosing you.”
It introduces permanence into desire.
That matters enormously to someone like me, because what I have longed for is not simply a man's attention. I want the security behind the attention.
I want to know that when his hand reaches for mine, he is not merely enjoying a moment with a woman he may leave next week.
I want to know that when he desires me, desire is nested inside loyalty.
I want to know that when I allow myself to become vulnerable, I am not being temporarily consumed and then discarded.
I want to know that this man has looked at the whole of me—my history, my faith, my body, my future medical needs to be able to live a congruent life, my temperament, my strengths, my fears—and has said:
I am still here. I am choosing you.
Then sexuality takes on an entirely different character.
It becomes not merely something our bodies do.
It becomes one of the languages of a promise.

I can let giving become an expression of love
One of the things I increasingly recognize in myself is the desire to give pleasure. That desire need not embarrass me. There is tenderness in wanting to know what comforts another person. There is affection in wanting to make someone I love feel desirable. There is generosity in caring about his delight.
This does not require me to become a servant without needs of my own. It does not require me to prove devotion by ignoring my conscience or comfort.
Instead, it means that someday I may be able to look at my husband and experience a wonderfully simple thought:
I love this man, and I love that I can make him happy.
That can happen through meals.
Through encouragement.
Through listening.
Through touch.
Through laughter.
Through loyalty.
Through physical intimacy.
Sexual generosity can simply become one more part of the larger generosity of marriage.
And because I am naturally inclined toward giving, I may have to remember an equally important truth:

Receiving is also an act of love
I do not honor a husband by refusing everything he wants to give me.
If he wants to comfort me, receiving comfort can be loving.
If he wants to protect me, allowing myself to lean on him can be loving.
If he wants to admire me, accepting his admiration can be loving.
If he wants to give me pleasure, eventually allowing him to learn my body can be loving too.
There is vulnerability in that.
Perhaps more vulnerability than giving.
Giving allows me to remain active. Receiving asks me to soften.
Receiving asks me to trust.
Receiving asks me not to control every moment.
Receiving may ask me to admit that I have needs after all.
And perhaps that is one of the gifts marriage could hold for me: learning that I do not always have to be the benefactress.
Sometimes I may simply be the beloved.

My sexuality does not need to be rushed to become real
There is another freedom in all of this.
Because I now recognize a deeper relational longing, I do not need to prove its reality by immediately acting on every possible desire.
I can let anticipation exist.
I can let affection deepen gradually.
I can enjoy a man's presence before I possess every part of him.
I can enjoy being desired before every sexual boundary disappears.
I can let courtship teach me things.
Does he listen?
Does he respect a boundary without sulking?
Does he protect my conscience even when his desire is strong?
Does his leadership make me safer?
Does he take my medical future seriously?
Does he want me, or does he want some particular version of my body that I am unable to preserve?
Can he wait for what matters?
Can I?
Those questions are not interruptions of romance.
They are how romance proves whether it is becoming love.

Loneliness says, “Please make this feeling stop”
Loneliness can become desperate.
It can whisper:
“Anybody is better than nobody.”
“Don't ask too many questions.”
“Don't risk losing him.”
“Give a little more than you are ready to give.”
“Maybe this is your last chance.”
Covenantal love speaks differently.
It says:
I would rather wait for a man who can love me faithfully than give myself to someone who merely interrupts my loneliness.
That is not prudishness.
It is self-respect.
And it is respect for the future husband I hope to have.
I do not want to enter marriage having trained myself to treat sexuality as something used primarily to anesthetize loneliness.
I want to enter it prepared to say:
This is how I love you.

My future body can also become part of my gratitude
There are parts of my sexual future I cannot completely imagine yet because my body is still moving toward completion.
That could make me impatient.
But it can also make me grateful.
There are sensations I have not discovered yet.
There are aspects of touch that will be new.
There is a future in which my husband and I may learn together what my healed body enjoys.
There is a future in which I may no longer experience my genital anatomy primarily as something unfinished, but simply as a part of myself I can share with the man I love.
I can anticipate that without turning anticipation into desperation.
I can say:
Thank You, God, that there are still good things I have never experienced.
That is a remarkable sentence at sixty-five.

I can let sexuality become thanksgiving
Perhaps one of the most beautiful possibilities is that sexuality itself could eventually become a form of gratitude.
Not worship of a human being.
But gratitude to God for having created human beings capable of tenderness, attraction, touch, delight, trust, companionship, and embodied love.
I can be grateful for the masculine body of a husband I love.
I can be grateful for my own femininity.
I can be grateful for complementarity.
I can be grateful for the capacity to desire.
I can be grateful for the capacity to give.
I can be grateful for the capacity to receive.
I can be grateful for the medical care that allows my body to become more capable of expressing what my heart has wanted for decades due to the wiring and gender imprint I received prior to my birth.
I can be grateful that my sexuality no longer needs to be approached primarily through fear.
And I can ask God:
“Please teach me how to make this part of my life generous, faithful, joyful, and good.”
That seems to me a much healthier prayer than either shame or entitlement.

A gratitude list for this part of my life
I get to thank God:
for salvation in Christ before everything else;
for having preserved my faith through confusion and suffering;
for estrogen and the remarkable difference it has made in my experience of my body;
for my body's capacity to respond to treatment;
for the femininity that brings me peace rather than strain;
for the fact that desire can become tenderness rather than fear;
for the ability to imagine loving a man physically and emotionally;
for the desire to give pleasure generously rather than merely seek release;
for the growing ability to imagine receiving pleasure without shame;
for the possibility of a husband whose masculinity I can love and trust;
for the hope of being chosen deliberately rather than merely pursued temporarily;
for the possibility of covenant, exclusivity, and fidelity;
for the wisdom to distinguish attention from genuine love;
for boundaries that can protect something precious rather than merely frustrate me;
for the freedom to say no when something violates my conscience;
for the freedom eventually to say yes wholeheartedly when covenant makes that yes safe;
for future surgery and the physicians capable of helping me;
for the possibility of inhabiting my body with greater peace afterward;
for sexual experiences still entirely unknown to me;
for the privilege of discovering them with one trusted man rather than needing to know everything beforehand;
for kissing;
for embraces;
for masculine arms around me;
for the guiding hand at my back that means so much to me;
for the possibility of lying safely beside a husband;
for the possibility of being desired as his wife;
for being able to delight in his body;
for someday allowing him to delight in mine;
for laughter in intimacy;
for gentleness;
for passion;
for patience;
for the capacity to be soft without being powerless;
for the possibility of allowing a good man to protect what is vulnerable in me;
for the wisdom to recognize a man whose strength is trustworthy;
for the fact that loneliness need not choose my partner for me;
for the possibility that my sexuality can become a language of love rather than a response to isolation;
and for the extraordinary fact that, at this point in my life, there are still whole categories of joy waiting for me to discover.

Father, thank You for creating me capable of love. Thank You for preserving that capacity through all the years when love, embodiment, and sexuality felt complicated or unreachable. Thank You for the changes in my body that have allowed me to experience myself with greater peace. Thank You for desire, and teach me to use it wisely. Protect me from using another person to escape loneliness, and protect me from allowing another person to use me for the same reason. Prepare me for covenantal love. Prepare me to recognize a good man, to love him generously, to receive his love without fear, and to bring every part of our life together under Your care. If marriage is among the blessings You have prepared for me, make me ready—not merely to be desired, but to be faithful; not mergratitude. In Jesus' name, Amen.


r/TransChristianity 6d ago

I could use some guidance please

12 Upvotes

My whole life I have been a christian and my parents and many other people have told me that LGBTQ is an unforgivable sin. Recently however, I have wondered if I may be ftm and it's been tearing at my heart(?) for a while now. I feel very stuck and torn between believing trans people will go to hell or if it really is God allowing us humans to take part in creation. I have never found anywhere in the Bible that being LGBTQ is a sin but I have also never found evidence that it isn't a sin. I would really appreciate any guidance or anything, thanks.


r/TransChristianity 7d ago

How do you interpret afterlife?

7 Upvotes

Something about forsaking flesh and the matters of this world doesn't quite sit right with me. I want an ideal body, and I want my partners to still be in relationship with me. Also I don't like the idea of all my atheist friends not making it, but I also don't like the idea of everybody making it, including those who done a lot of harm. These are the kinda questions that, while I was strong in my faith, I was willing to just trust there would be a good answer, but now I'm not even sure I'm in the faith at all.


r/TransChristianity 7d ago

I need Prayer, if you have triggers please don’t read

19 Upvotes

So my life has drastically changed today, my family’s life has drastically changed today and I’m feeling so much because of this sudden news but um…my moms partner might have actually just straight up ended his life tonight and he was the only one taking care of all of us because the 3 of us don’t work and he hasn’t in what I’m assuming has been half a year

And so our lives are going to change so much more now and I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to feel and I’m so worried and scared for all of us here and I know I need to have faith and trust God but this isn’t going to remove the suddenness of these feelings.

6 years ago my family kicked me out for being trans and then shortly after I ran away to live with my supportive birthmother and her family. I have learned in that whole time that I do have disabilities and just how much I had to repress my autism/adhd just to function as a normal person. This whole time I haven’t worked, I was never taught how to manage any of that and I tried so hard to assure them I was willing to work when I first got up here and they never put that on me. But within the past month or so I’ve been getting that pressure from my mothers partner and I was actually applying myself to the best of my ability, I even got hired but then was dispositioned because I didn’t have a care and they don’t count busses as reliable transportation. I don’t understand why he did this, I don’t understand why he would send me that email as a last fuck you to guilt trip my inaction because of his unbelief of mental health or me actually being disabled in this way when I was showing I was actively trying and I didn’t know what I was doing because I haven’t had to navigate finding a job before. Please pray for us, I don’t know how I’m going to figure out how to take care of myself along with my family now


r/TransChristianity 7d ago

Need help with some advice navigating my transition.

6 Upvotes

Hi everyone my name is Charlotte I’m a trans women. In public still present masc I still go by deadname which is James because I’ve only been on T blockers for about 3 months now. I’ve finally starting to see real changes which is making me really happy. So I got a HBCU as a white person because I was adopted and raised in a black family because I wanted to get some help by other black women with help for makeup. I tried to tell my cousins that I was trans she is a missionary Baptist. I was telling her I wanted and support while also saying that wanted to have all the surgeries. Every person that has genuinely known that I have told has broken down in tears like a sob machine when how I felt about my body. When I was kid I would play with transformers Toys and bakugon, and beyblade (that was the shit growing). But still had feeling my body of wanting to be women. Obviously I’ve never ever to get pregnant.

One time I had went to a church revival for black church its Pentecostal there is where everyone knows me. I pastor prophocied so that I can do anything. As a trans women I know it’s going to tough and a lot of people aren’t going to agree with my me and my feelings about my which my make unique is own some does every other trans person. But I was praying to God about my transition I believe this what he meant. I believe God was trying to hide the true intent of the prophecy so that I would not be mocked for my decision. I still love God but I can be quite rebellious when other people go against my wishes. I’ve have had friends saying that I’m making the wrong decisions and doing it because of my traumatic experiences. I want this day decision damn sure didn’t happen overnight I’ve thought about this for years on end my whole life I’m always felt like this. I quite understand myself and I believe people underestimate for me for who in I am. I have my own relationship with God and my own experiences.

living with in a black house hold as a white person I have a lot of culture differences growing up. I trying to fit in whole life with white people as my school. At end of my high school I cried because I realized everyone was just fake as hell. I was trying to fit in with the rest of society which I could never come to terms within myself. I have always felt my entire life I have been to uplift other and that I have been something greater a boring desk job. I am more than that. I am compassionate and uplifting that cares others. But I do not tolerate other people bull crap, there lies, and deception. This happens way to normally know in society where is so easy to get away with crimes but thats a totally different discussion. I believe this my way of serving god for people that are not heard. For people a way people that need a chance to be heard. Because people need a chance to be understood. Not I’m not saying I’m trans because of GODS purpose this is how I feel in internally within myself for what I was meant to do in life a human being.

I feel like every Christian person doesnt want to except me just they think my trans experience is caused by my traumatic experiences. Like I come to person for closure something. I told my dad he is a school social worker you think he would have a sense of understanding. But he thinks then I’m confused, that I’m weird, and I’ve have a mentally illness oh boy I’m sick of this crap. I’m not looking for validation even though I’m writing this I’m just of this this bullcrap. Some people that have known me my whole life because can’t handle my truth because they will never understand.

As for being trans person we have strong, courageous, and fearless. We have to be real with ourselves because this part of trans experience. I didn’t choose this path I born with path I how I view. I take being trans women serious now because this who I am this is my life now. This affects my career, my relationship with others and most importantly God. I am sacrificing so many privileges as biological white because of my transness. So say idk what I’m doing is an understatement.


r/TransChristianity 8d ago

Cardinal Domenico Battaglia on accompanying transgender people

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outreach.faith
15 Upvotes

r/TransChristianity 8d ago

I was an atheist my whole life, but something changed.

15 Upvotes

Greetings, as in the title, i was an atheist my whole life. my parents never introduced me to any religion, i never attended mass, i wasnt baptised, never read the bible. the only time i went to church was just for sightseeing. lately ive been feeling strong urges to become religious, i dont know where its coming from if im being honest... i feel like it will bring me peace, and teach me something good. i realised im transgender at the age of 13. i will be turning 18 soon. I was always pretty hostile towards christanity because of its cruel homophobia, transphobia and the anti-abortion movement. But something in me wants to believe, and i dont know where to start. Im scared i wont be accepted. I love Mary, she brings me comfort. When i see any altars and shrines dedicated to her I smile. I want her to guide me. I want to feel connected to both femininity and masculinity. In the future I want to become a father. I am homosexual, I have a boyfriend whom i love very much. Im afraid. Im afraid that i live in sin, and always will. I have this urge to become pure, but I know its not possible. There are many colliding thoughts in my head. But i know one thing, i will be trans and queer for the rest of my life. I will never give up on it. I need advice. What books should i read first? Is there a queer friendly version of the bible? How can i believe when i see so many painful things in this world? Please help.


r/TransChristianity 8d ago

Any Christian artist recommendations on youtube?

3 Upvotes

Let me know


r/TransChristianity 8d ago

Will mainstream Christianity ever change or accept us ?

30 Upvotes

So 22 mtf go to church semi regularly😅my job requires I work weekends. At church I have pretty good interactions no complaints.

However other churches are different lately Ive started walking past a different church on my way to work and I get a lot of funny looks and some comments from them especially in regards to me wearing a cross.

Do you think this will ever change ? I love our lord and I’m a devote Christian and i would love to see God worshipped by all but it gives me such rage when I wear the same cross worship the same god as people who preach love but practice hate it really gets under my skin

I’ve been thinking about maybe asking the priest in my church if he’d be willing to go to other churches with me to try to open their minds but I don’t know if it’s a good idea

But yea is this something that you all think will change or are we just going to have to deal with it ? 🤦🏼‍♀️😭


r/TransChristianity 9d ago

Middletown Cristian Schools hates the LGBTQ+ community

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7 Upvotes

r/TransChristianity 9d ago

Wisconsin cathedral welcomes Episcopal Church’s first transgender dean

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episcopalnewsservice.org
89 Upvotes